I was the lucky auntie who got to go to Scotland and be with Kate during her first few days at St. Andrews.  Kate's mom Linda was suppose to be there too but stayed home because the student visa people messed up. Linda always put her children first and this was just another example of her love and dedication to Kate. The beautiful house Kate and I are standing In front of was rented for us by our sweet friend Marsha Coupe' and her loving husband Richard. Marsha and Richard came all the way from England to make our stay wonderful and perfect. It was my honor to accompany Kate to get her settled in the dorms, eat gross cafeteria food, do all the registration stuff and buy her red St. Andrews Robe. She would wear this special robe to many school functions. I feel so blessed to of had this time with Kate. We walked the amazing streets of St. Andrews talking and laughing. I greatly enjoyed listening to Kate and all her plans while attending St. Andrews University. What a perfect magical place for Kate to be. St. Andrews looked like a beautiful movie scene or picture from an incredible story book. Kate was so happy and so excited to start this next chapter of her life and I couldn't of been happier for her! 

Love you sweet niece, Aunt Jacque

Yesterday my sweet precious Kate would have celebrated her 26th birthday.  Kate was born on out 9 th wedding anniversary so we have shared this day with happiness for 24 years. Now without Kate it is truly a sad reminder of all we have lost. We miss you terribly sweet angel and love you more than ever.  Love Mom

Happy Birthday My Dear Loving Kate,

This would have been your 25th Birthday, and we should be celebrating your graduation from the University of St. Andrews.   I am proud of you earning your Honours Degree in Economics. Know that you will be graduating with your class today, even though you will not physically be there. 

When thinking back on your birthdays, one of the two that first came to mind was the year that we were visiting Yellowstone National Park, and planned to be at the Old Faithful Geyser on your Birthday.   We'd purchased your Birthday cake and all agreed that we should celebrate at the Geyser.  You were about age seven or eight.  

We were at the Geyser, it went off ... and we lit the candles on your cake and started to sing you the Happy Birthday song to you.   There were about 75-100 people who had gathered to watch the Geyser go off, and most of them joined in to sing Happy Birthday to you, and congratulate you on your Birthday.   And you, lovingly, wanted to share your Birthday cake with everyone ....

And at about that time is when it dawned on me, that I hadn't fully thought this situation through ... as we were woefully in short supply of cake, paper plates and forks in our motorhome and at the geyser.   But you helped lead the way with the solution, suggesting that the cake be cut into very small pieces so that it could be shared with anyone who wanted some, and making sure that you talked with and said thank you to almost everyone gathered around for your birthday celebration.     It was a great and cherished moment, that I will remember forever.   

I Love You. 

Dad 

For Kate
Kate was a star, and like a star she shone brightness and beauty upon who all who knew her. She was a star in her performances, for her voice, and for her heart. I never got the chance to see Kate on stage, but much to her chagrin I have heard many stories. She loved the stage and musical theater, and it was one of the million qualities I loved about her. She was talented beyond measure, and when I got the chance to hear her sing I understood what everyone had said about her. She radiated beauty in all aspects of her life, but none more important than her heart. Kate gave all she was to her friends and family, and all who have came into her life know the light she brought with her. Her beautiful soul led to her to so many friends over the years, and she always advocated and cared for each. Ten months ago, I too ended up among these
ranks. When Kate and I met, it was a blind date and I was nervous. We sat down for dinner, and it wasn’t until she made a joke about Pokemon that you could see my tension roll off of me. She later told me that when she made the joke she was scared she had made a fool of herself, and little did she know that comment would the beginning of our relationship. When she flew away to Scotland shortly after, I was adamant that she was not getting away. We began
messaging nonstop through the use of Facebook messenger and compared ourselves to a couple divided by war writing letters back and forth. The messenger tone soon became a beacon for me to stop whatever I was doing and check my phone, I couldn’t get enough of her wit and jokes. This is how we fell in love. She won me over with constant teasing, asking me to watch “Company” and the four hour “Les miserables,” (multiple versions) and arguing with me about political and foreign affairs. We never ran out of anything to say. And although those qualities told me I liked this girl, it was much more than made me love her, much more that stole my heart, much more that became my world. It was the way she scrunched her face when I said to her I loved her more, and when we played ro sham bo to make decisions. It was the way she
would start a snowball fight in the middle of the street in truckee, and the way she would hide under the blankets to pretend she was mad. It was the way we would set our alarms to fall asleep skyping each other, and the way she would say we are so cute it’s misgusting. It was so much more. And in all of that, Kate was intelligent, and challenged my way of thinking. She brought out a side of me that I had began to forget. She was compassionate, and I wanted to
match her in caring and kindness. She would call me when she was upset, and I too would confide in her secrets I had not shared. We became everything to each other, needing each other. What she didn’t know was that she was my rock. When I came home from work, she was the first person I wanted to talk to, which is ironic because I was on my phone constantly messaging her any chance I had a break. When I needed to talk, or rant, or complain she
always listened. She would console, give advice, and affirm. Never have I met a person that made me feel as whole and important as she. She respected my job and enamored my personality, very few can offer as much support and unconditional love than her. She made me feel alive. She came into my life when I needed her most, and that is a gift I will never be able to repay. She, like a star, like the sun, gave my world meaning and hope. My day rose and set with her. So she became my star. To quote Robert browning:

My Star
BY ROBERT BROWNING
All that I know
Of a certain star,
Is, it can throw
(Like the angled spar)
Now a dart of red,
Now a dart of blue,
Till my friends have said
They would fain see, too,
My star that dartles the red and the blue!
Then it stops like a bird; like a flower, hangs furled:
They must solace themselves with the Saturn above it.
What matter to me if their star is a world?
Mine has opened its soul to me; therefore I love it.

Kate had opened her soul to me, and I her. Everything that I am, and everything that I will be exists now because of the love we had, and the love that will bring us together in the end. When I now look upon the sky, I don’t see stars, but Kate’s smile reminding me that life is beautiful and that this is not goodbye. We will someday see Kate’s smile, and feel the touch of her hand, and
hear the beauty of her voice. My heart goes out to all that love Kate, and especially her family, nothing will ever fill the void that now exists. Know, this is not goodbye, and the only words left to say is to Kate, I love you, and never will I forget all that your heart has shown me. As you would say “Promise?” in your cute expectant tone. I Promise, promise my love.
Thank you.

For those of you who do not know me, I’m Kate’s very proud Uncle, Alex. I have the privilege of being married to Kate’s loving Aunt, Jacque, who was like a second mom to Kate, and we have two beautiful children, Kate’s cousin’s, Jonathan and Lexi. Both of our children have always looked up to Kate and loved every minute they had together, yes, even when she made them do their homework! When Guy and Linda asked me to speak, so many emotions came over me and like many of you here today I was at a loss for words because when someone as precious and extraordinary as Kate is taken from us it defies all wisdom and comprehension. Like all of you, our family has struggled with many emotions and feelings… disbelief, anger, hopelessness…
But Kate would want us to celebrate her life, to not be angry or sad. Today is a celebration of joy that Kate brought to our lives. Someone once said,” If we are to call ourselves Christians or Children of God then we must trust God and trust and believe in his plan for us.” Don’t get me wrong, it won’t be easy to let her go, she is loved by so many people and she has touched so many lives. But let us remember that Kate never really belonged to us, she belongs to God, like we all do. During this time, Kate would want us to be faithful, courageous and kind.
From the time she was born, people were drawn to Kate. She had a remarkable personality and a beautiful smile. Guy and Linda were so loved that it was right that their first born would come into this world eagerly anticipated and loved beyond measure. Because of this, she had more pictures and movies taken of her than anyone I’ve ever known. I’m not kidding; I think Guy and Linda single handedly kept Kodak in business for at least three years. One afternoon when Jacque and I were watching Kate and Brooke, we were looking at photo albums and I remember Brooke saying “this is great and everything but are there any pictures with me?”
When Kate was only 8 months old, we called her Katie then, Jacque and I had just started dating. I remember asking Jacque out on a date and she said ” I’m sorry, I’m taking care of Katie.” I told her I wouldn’t mind helping. Little did I know she was always taking care of Kate even when Kate didn’t need to be taken care of. Jacque just couldn’t stay away from that beautiful little baby! As you can imagine, most of our dates ended up at Guy and Linda’s home having fun with Katie whether we were reading her favorite stories, playing games, belly laughing, swimming or participating in her many plays. We loved it so much we would cancel our plans for an opportunity to care of her. And as we watched her grow so did her personality. She was not only kind and loving but she was a little bossy too! In fact, I take full credit for her ability to Direct. I must have played the role of the Killer Whale from the movie Free Willey a thousand times and I had to do it exactly as she directed or we had to do it over and over again! And those of you who know Kate know that telling her no was not an option. Honestly, I probably had more fun than she did. And that personality trait, well it served her well in life. She was extremely driven, like her Mom and Dad, a perfectionist in many ways. She wanted to please others and most of all her parents. Kate, if you are listening right now, know that you far exceeded any of our expectations and you made your parents and all of us very proud.
As most of you know, Kate loved the arts…singing, acting, directing and playing the piano. Linda exposed Kate to the arts at a very young age and Kate took to it quickly. She was very dedicated to improving her many talents and it was a joy to see her succeed at something she really loved. Her voice was so beautiful and we all enjoyed listening to her sing especially at our home during family gatherings Thanksgiving, Christmas or other special occasions. My fondest memories are of the two of us singing her favorite songs from Phantom of the Opera “All I Ask of You” and “Think of Me”. She even made me practice before we sang together, because you know Kate, it had to be perfect and every once in a while she would say to me fondly, “Let’s try a different key” I think we all know what that really meant…
Kate was in numerous productions and she enjoyed being in all of them. She really loved having people come to see her perform, especially family. Kate really enjoyed her fellow actors. She loved them like they were family. It was always fun to see them together, laughing, joking, and having fun together. They really cared for each other. As for Kate, she couldn’t wait to be on the stage! Most of us would have been intimidated but not Kate; she felt right at home on stage. She was brilliant and fearless.
Oh, have I mentioned she was incredibly smart? She could have gone to any University or College of her choice. She interviewed at Yale, chose my Alma Matre, USC but ended up at the third Oldest University in the English speaking World, the prestigious University of St. Andrews in Scotland. Jacque was blessed with the opportunity to accompany Kate during her first days at St. Andrews getting her settled in her dorm room and registered for classes. Jacque will never forget the time they shared together, standing in line to get her ceremonial red academic gown, introducing her to the awful dorm food, trying to introduce her to boys as they walked by…but when Jacque skyped me from the University, she said the most endearing thing to me, she said, “Kate is home here at St. Andrews and she is going to blossom. And blossom she did. Hearing about all her accomplishments including graduating with first class honors made us all very proud. As much as she loved being at the University, we all knew she was looking forward to coming home after graduation to be with family and the love of her life, Jay.
This past Christmas we all had the opportunity to meet Jay. She couldn’t wait to introduce Jay to all of us. Jay, I have to tell you, when you came to our home for Christmas you were there to pass the Uncle Alex and Aunt Jacque test…Let me just say that you passed with flying colors! She loved you deeply but you passed the test because we know you loved her just as deeply and that is all we could ever ask. I want you to know that you are always welcome in our home and you will always be a part of our family.
So what now? How are we supposed to heal? How are we supposed to feel? And how are we supposed to act? One of the most difficult things about Kate’s death is the loss of potential of what could have been. Kate had a lot of unfulfilled dreams. However, I believe that Kate is fulfilling those dreams now in a much better place for she has found eternal peace and she is one with the loving embrace of our father. What we do in life echoes in eternity. Kate gave us so much. When we leave here today, let us remember all the good that Kate represented in this world. Remember that a part of her is in every one of us and her spirit will be with us always.
For Guy and Linda, Brooke and Craig, our hearts break for your loss and we pray for your recovery. Guy and Linda, please take solace in the fact that you did an incredible job. You raised a beautiful child and you did it the right way. You are a great example for all of us. (Today is the day we let go of Kate.) Lord we pray that in your heart and in your peace, which passeth all understanding, abide all the days of our lives, never forgetting that Craig and Brooke are still among us, shine your light upon all of us and please bring comfort to the Vasconcellos family and to all of us. Thank you and God Bless.

This has always been one of my favorite pictures of Kate, and one that she used on her acting CV for several years. 

I Love You Kate.

Dad