ForeverMissed
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Her Life

Mum's Eulogy - 21.03.2011

April 23, 2011
My family would like to thank you all for coming and joining us as we say goodbye to Katy -  wife, mum, mother-in-law, grandma, great grandma, aunt and friend, as she continues on her next life journey.

As we sat together as a family we were able to share some of the memories we have of a woman of great inner strength and resilience who had faced a life challenged by much adversity/hardship/loves/struggles and at times, great deprivation. All these traits join to shape the woman we admire and love.

I would like to share some of our memories and mum's memories with you all today.

As a young child, mum grew up in Krasnostav, in the Ukraine,borne to Olga and Wasili(Basil) Sinitschuk, 87 years ago, not long after the ending of the 1st world war.

Life was tough in Europe at this time and mum's father decided to go to America to see if a new life could be had for his wife and daughters.The iron curtain came down and at 5 years of age, with the beginning of the Stalin Regime, life became a fierce struggle. Mum's mother had to become sole caregiver to her girls as this new life began without a husband or father. As all communications with the outside world ceased, her father was never heard of again.

Hardship and poverty was part of daily living - mum had to walk many miles to school and even in the below freezing winters was barefoot and without underwear - homework was done by the flickering light of the open fire. She had little formal education, leaving school at 14. But life was no picnic as days were filled working in the fields to earn food - no wages - just food for the family to eat. Mum on occasion would talk of having nothing to eat but grass and leaves. In this land of plenty we cannot begin to comprehend this type of hunger and famine - the struggle to stay alive - as we enjoy food in abundance in our daily lives.

Mum was 16 in 1939, when the Germans invaded her village and she was taken as slave labour to Germany. Mum was, in one way, very fortunate in that she worked for a good family on their farm. She worked very hard with long hours starting at 4am milking 8 cows 3 times a day, rain, hail or shine along with domestic duties. Bread and milk was her breakfast and she had a warm bed to sleep in - for the first time in her life she was not hungry and another first was having a doona but she sorely missed having the warmth of her mother's love.

Mum was never to see her mother and sister(Toni) again. Wartime life was not easy for any.

At 22, at a dance at the immigration refugee camp, mum was swept off her feet by the dashing Michail and they were married in 1947. Fellow camp friends helped to prepare the wedding feast - the women cooking up a storm in the camp canteen and the men selling blankets on the black market to buy vodka.

Married life began in style - a rented flat shared with a friend - mum now could stop her domestic duties - working for a wealthy family outside the camp because dad was doing well selling chocolates and making vodka to also sell on the black market.

In Germany the family became 3 with the birth of Sasha(Alex). An opportunity to work in the coal mines in Belgium came up for dad and the family left for a new life in a small mining flat.

My life began in Belgium - now a family of 4. Due to a breach of contract by the Belgian authorities a huge family decision was made to move back to Germany. Another deciding factor was that coal miners' sons had to work in the mines - this was not the life mum or dad wanted for us. A secret escape was made across the border back into Germany - mum armed with her babies, frypans and porcelaine enamel ration bowl.

After a further 2 years in a refugee camp in Germany we were finally provided passage to Australia.

New life begins again in another camp - this time in Nelsons Bay. After 3 months home became an old milking shed in Salt Ash where mum and dad worked and saved to buy their land in Fern Bay. Many happy times were spent together as a family in our garage home with mum developing her love of gardening, growing veggies and keeping chooks and when one was required for dinner she would prepare it for the table.

Mum taught herself English by looking at pictures in newspapers or on labels of jars or packets and trying to work out the words. Also by talking to neighbours and memorising several words a day from a dictionary. We often laughed as she recalled mixing up apple-turnovers as apple-overturns.

Mum and dad built their family home and moved into her pride and joy. Mum was a wonderful caregiver, homemaker and worker dedicated to improving her family's lives. She could turn her hands to anything - sewing beautifully, knitting, crocheting, etc - all self taught. She had a cheeky sense of humour and loved a good laugh.

Our little Aussie Michael was born in Stockton making us a family of 5.

Life was embraced in Australia and mum relished in watching her children grow and thrive in a free world.

She was able to make contact with her mum and sister again and was most grateful that life here was much easier than the struggles her mum and sister still endured back home and she and dad helped them as much as they could.

Over the years her family grew and Alex, Michael and I married and moved on with our family lives. Mum had great delight baking wedding cakes and also entertaining at the family home. Not a birthday or wedding was celebrated without mum's fantastic cooking, accompanied with wine, beer and song and, of course, vodka.

She enjoyed helping her children with their babies as they arrived and loved nothing more than to have the family home for meals to sample all her delicacies - borsch, vereniki, piroshki to name a few. The kitchen was always a hub of activity and the garden was always a picture. Let me tell you mum was so house proud we could have eaten from the floor. Mum took great delight in perfecting cake recipes and her sponges and xmas cakes were enjoyed by so many.

Children grown, grandchildren grown, dad retired - time for a life together - off to the club to play Hoy and Bingo and make new friends.

The passing of Alex was a great loss for our family and mum found life very difficult as she dealt with her grief. III health gradually beginning to slip in.

The last couple of years have been a daily vigil for dad and my brother Michael caring for her needs as she moved from home care to Wescott Nursing Home, they gave their time with much love and dedication and we are all most thankful for that, and also Tracee who did the night shift during mum's last 4 days.

As we talked yesterday(20-03-11) dad said to us, I called her golden hands - she managed her husband, her home and the finances to ensure the family enjoyed a quality life after much hardship in their early years. Dad said he would have been penniless without her.

We all have little treasures and mementos of mum. We remember a lady of great strength, a devoted wife and mother, loving grandma and great grandma. We admire how adversity shaped her life and we are thankful that she is no longer suffering and at peace. Mum's life journey had many happy times, and we thank you all once again for sharing with us today.

As the curtians close now you will hear a Russian Folksong - Katuschka - a song which was special to mum and dad telling of a woman sending her love to her home and family as she walks through apple and pear blossoms in heavy mist by the river - this expression of love was what mum always wanted to surround her family with.

         ( Many thanks to my sister for reading this eulogy on the day )