一年又一年。時間好快。想你了，豆豆。希望一切都好啊。

转眼又是一年。我们都老了一岁，只有你的青春永不褪色。想念你！

豆子 希望你在那边一切都好 继续做个风一样的女侠！风里还能传来你和蕾子的笑声。。

转眼这又是一年了，希望你一切都好。

又是一年了。过几天去看看你。

讨论起去yosimite的事，想到上次还是和你一起去的。那时候hiking的时候你走的飞快，步履轻盈。
希望你在天上也继续做一个快快乐乐的元气少女！

祝天上的你安好。。想你了小灰豆。。

生日快乐呀小灰豆

豆豆呀，转眼一年了，还是想到和你一起好玩的事情，看到一些脑洞好大的东西想要转发却不知道发给谁。希望你一切安好啊，做一个像风一样的快乐少女，爱你。

芳，又想你了，想带你第一次去爬你一金鸡岭你的开心和兴奋，还有和你最后一次看电影你说的那些话……跟你在一起的时间，是一段特别美好的时光，你的真性情和快言快语真是会感染到身边的人。你是个特别懂事的人，要保佑叔叔阿姨健康平安。

I found out this morning that you have left this world. Wish we had kept in touch. Rest well xhd. You are missed.

今天看到了一部很有趣的综艺，想找人分享。突然就想起小灰豆了。如果你还在的话，我一定会跟你发微信，我们还会一起吐槽。
记得那个时候三十而已热播的时候，你那么义愤填膺，吐槽里面的渣男。
虽然你已经走了有段时间了，但是突然想起的时候，还是觉得很难过。看看我们以前的聊天记录，其实大多是些这样那样的小事，我们也说不上是经历了什么试炼的深厚友谊。但你真的是一个难得的，非常真性情的人。You will forever be missed.

It is such a strange feeling now. Just 2 months ago I was still having active discussions with Kexin on scientific papers and how they would apply to the problems she was working. If anything, I think it really exemplifies the person she was: a dedicated, smart, hard-working person who did not want to let her disease become a blocker to making our team successful. She wanted so much to deliver and contribute to the team, because for her, as for me and the others on the team, we all really felt like an “office family”.

Kexin and I joined the team at about the same time in 2018 and in many ways, I saw her as a little sister: we would laugh about many things, gossip a bit, but she would call me out and keep me real whenever needed. Through our conversations, I also learned a bit about her family. First of all, she loved her parents SO MUCH. She talked about her mother and father very often. I remember when she was diagnosed that she was hesitant to tell them because she knew how much pain it would cause them and she just did not want them to suffer. Also with respect to her husband, I still remember her happiness when she came back from their trip to Hawaii. She tried to hide her secret date a little bit, but she could not hold back for long because she was so in love, you could see it all over her face. Throughout our conversations both before and after the diagnosis, she just loved Xiaochang more and more. Thanks for being there for her throughout this whole time, and marrying her. I know you meant the world to her.

There are so many stories and anecdotes I could share with you, but I will limit myself to two moments that really stood out to me:
1.    In 2019 we went for a team lunch in an Italian restaurant that I love. Kexin ended up ordering a pizza pepperoni as she was really hungry, but because she was ‘on a diet’, she asked the pizza to be without cheese. At one point, someone jokingly said that the pepperoni probably was just as bad, if not worse than the cheese. So when the pizza arrived, Kexin removed all the pepperoni and ended up just eating the dough with the sauce. As you can imagine, she never wanted to go back to this restaurant because the pizza was so bad ;)
2.    I also remember when I brought my son Daniel to the office for the first time. He was only a few months old and he was still very uncomfortable with other people. However, with Kexin he just felt right at home. He kept on smiling and he loved how she held him close. Kexin actually did not know in advance that I was bringing him, but when I then came back from lunch with Daniel, Kexin had gone out to a shop to buy some baby cookies for him. It is just one of the many ways that she showed how much she cared about everyone she came in touch with

As a last note maybe, I want to note some of the things the people on the team associated with Kexin: “Smart”, “proud”, “makes subtle jokes”, “thoughtful”, “Caring”, “Ambitious”, “persevering”, “vibrant”, “laughter”, “always willing to help”

芳，对不起，我刚知道。20年7月份，你找我聊天，我以为就是简单的聊天，却不知你正忍受着病痛。我注意到你时常换微信背景墙，我以为你还是那个调皮孩子气小芳，不曾想这么多。
在我眼里，你很孩子气、很幼稚、很情绪化、很上进、很执着。
和你在一起，我真的很开心。你说我们背书包的姿势一样不着调，我很开心；你说是我陪你看的09年最后一场电影，我很开心；我们各自去大明湖，在门口相遇，我特别开心；你毕业买了两件T恤衫，要我们一人穿一件，我嘴上说不穿，心里很开心；你学业重、压力大时见到我会一句话不说，我很害怕；你悄悄离校不告诉我，我很失落。
芳，我会一直想着你。

Kexin, you were such a patient and kind person to work with- so knowledgeable yet humble. Thank you for all that you have done for us and you are deeply missed.

Our love and deepest condolences to Kexin's family and friends!

I'll deeply miss Kexin's smile, laugh, and unending kindness (and patience!).

For those of us who are not scientists, she had such an incredible way of connecting with and teaching us how to make sense of what she was doing and how she was thinking. She was always eager to answer questions and explain something over and over until you got it. We'll miss you.

T

I am at loss for words. Kexin was my onboarding buddy when I had my internship for the very first time at Amazon. She was always kind to me. I haven't even had the chance to catch up with her since. May you rest in peace, Kexin.

May you rest in peace, Kexin. My thoughts are with your family at this difficult time.

My thoughts are with Kexin's family. And, may she rest in peace.

Matt

刚得知这个信息，感到很震惊、很悲伤。小灰豆是我在安娜堡期间的同学和室友，我们一起共度了一年半的时光。这是我人生中最难过的时候，我们一起生活，一起学习。她给我带来了很多欢乐，似乎有她的地方就有阳光。我还记得她最喜欢我给她做西红柿炒鸡蛋，她也给我做过巨大的山东包子。后来一别，两地分隔，我看到她继续在安娜堡完成第二学位，又在美国找到了工作，替她感到开心。没想到以这么意外的方式离开了我们。人生有聚有散，逝者已矣，生者节哀。希望yufang一路走好，你给我的回忆和快乐与我同在。

灰豆，你是一个乐观，热爱生活和热心肠的朋友。你积极的情绪总能感染身边的人。我一直很钦佩你在治疗过程中依然保持着充足的能量， 到现在还是很难相信你离开了。 希望你在另一边都好，大家都会记住你是个快乐的灰豆。

It seems impossible that Kexin has left our small circle and coming to terms with this loss has created a profound sadness. But it is also impossible not to celebrate the vibrant, warm, shining essence that defined Kexin and her positive impact on everyone who was fortunate to experience her presence.

Kexin was the very first science hire for our team. We didn’t know what exceptional science looked like until we met Kexin. And she was not only incredibly capable and intelligent, but she was also thoughtful, creative, and kind. Kexin and I worked across the country from each other, with me in New York and Kexin in Seattle. And even though the majority of our interactions were digital via email, text, or video, Kexin’s personality always came through. And, it was always a pleasure to see her name pop up on my screen. Looking back, I feel very lucky that I had the chance to share a meal with Kexin in one of my last visits to Seattle, just the two of us, at one of her favorite places in Seattle, Din Tai Fung. We had dumplings, (likely too many), and chatted on end about life, family, and friends.

Over time, as we became aware of the serious health issues that Kexin was confronting, her concern often seemed like it was for our own peace of mind instead. She wanted to continue to work as well as she could, even as that became more difficult over the months. She would constantly ask us not to worry and to not be too overwhelmed by the difficulties she was facing. Her valiant bravery, combined with her empathy for those around her, will always remain in my mind as the defining dual nature of her spirit.

Kexin was a cherished part of our team, and her absence leaves a void that is impossible to fill. We miss you and love you.

亲爱的小灰豆，
一起走过的两年安娜堡生活真的很开心，有你的记忆都是那么的美好那么的快乐。感恩你带来的温暖和陪伴。我们永远不会忘记有个可爱的少女名叫小灰豆，她喜欢看电影吃爆米花喜欢说走就走的road trip喜欢杨幂还有一身功夫。。。希望你在另一个世界一切安好，永远快乐自由。很想你。
mini和法拉

小芳，还记得2007年9月开学第一天，你是我见到的第一个大学同学，我们分到一个宿舍，两张床正好对着，你来得比我早一些，早就自己铺好了床铺，妈妈送我进宿舍的时候你热情的跟我打招呼，帮我铺床，说你住校很多年了，而我是第一次住校，有什么需要帮忙的尽管叫你。你虽然年纪最小却能力最强，我一直觉得像你这么厉害的学霸怎么会跟我们一个大学。我们一起去报社团，你画画特棒直接去了文艺部，之后每周末就舍我而去忙社团了。还记得一起去教室占位上自习的时光，课间溜去小卖部买猫耳朵吃，你常常抱怨学不进去，却是成绩最好的那个。记得你最喜欢看《my girl》，在你的带动下我也迷上了薛功灿，那时候你的铃声就是里面的主题曲，现在我依然会唱。得知你走的消息，我的脑海里不停的回响那首歌：
you never say goodbye
한동안 멍하니 우두커니 앉아
다시 생각했지만
멈출 순 없겠어
온통 그대 생각 할 수밖에 없는
내 자신이 미워
don't you let me go
baby don't you let me down
不是never say goodbye么，你怎么先走了呢
小芳，单纯善良古灵精怪又聪明有趣的小女孩，希望天堂里再也没有痛苦和别离。

Hi，小灰豆！希望你现在可以自由自在，开心快乐，天堂没有痛苦，请继续做个美好的小仙女吧！一直想在这里写点什么，犹豫很久，因为我没有太多的故事可以分享，但还是很想送上我的哀悼和怀念。我们虽只有一面之缘，但我对你的开朗乐观幽默有很深的印象！你可以很快的打开话匣子，聊起我们对安娜堡的共同印象，你可以云淡风轻的说起自己出了点事故于是就拒了亚麻，你也可以细数对西雅图的喜爱让我更坚定了如果面试通过就赶紧搬过来！当时我就在想，这个潇洒可爱的女孩子，如果我能来肯定会和你成为朋友，但好像命运一直都让我们相差一步。也许在安娜堡的那几年有无数次擦肩而过却没有机会真正认识对方，而当我终于来了西雅图开始跟你在一个楼工作时，你也开始了跟病魔的斗争。这几天我看了很多关于你的故事，感觉大家眼中的你和那些回忆，还有关于安娜堡和SLU的点点滴滴都是那么熟悉那么美好。很遗憾总是失之毫厘不能跟你相处更多，更难过年轻善良的你需要去经历这么多磨难。思绪万千，还是那句，一路走好，永远开心！

Cassie

Dear Kexin,
You are fever in our hearts. What an incredible soul you were. you leave behind so many special memories. Praying that you rest at peace.

I offer Kexin's family my thoughts, prayers, and well wishes during these dark times in your life.

Best,
Haotian

小芳，已经习惯了这么喊你，昨天晚上听闻这个消息后，我的心情久久不能平复，有点恍惚，我无法想象也不忍想象你经历了怎样的痛苦、挣扎、无助与绝望，此时只能深深的给你祝福，希望你化作天使，在另外一个世界快乐幸福。
虽然已经许久没有联系，但在我的脑海里你一直是大学时候那个善良、可爱、热情的你，时间仿佛又回到了2007年的夏天……
那年的我们考入了同一所大学，在一个班，一个宿舍，你是宿舍里面年龄最小的那一个，却是智商最高，反应最快的那一个，总是能用最短的时间解决那些我们感觉很难的课题，虽然自嘲是学渣却是实实在在的学霸。宿舍里的人都很佩服你。
现在回想起来，虽然你的年龄最小，却是对自己的人生目标最有规划的人，因为你知道自己想要什么，因为你崇尚自由，所以你选择了去美国继续深造。你的努力、坚持与韧性我们都看在眼里，不同于普通的学霸，你还有很多特长，运动、画画、游泳你都不在话下，而且还能和大家都相处的很好。
大学毕业后，你只身一人去美国继续学业，我们慢慢少了联系，但是通过你的朋友圈，知道你在那边非常精彩，也有了恋爱，我以为一切会顺理成章，优秀的你值得拥有这些。没想到再一次听闻你的消息竟是永别，在人生最幸福的年华，你遭遇了人生中最大的难题。我只能以这种方式寄托对你深深的怀念和祝福，愿你的家人能够继续勇敢积极的面对接下来的生活，希望你在那边一切都好，在我们心中，你永远是那个乐观、热情、善良的姑娘。

My condolences on her passing. She was always very helpful and kind, with a joyful smile. May she rest in peace.

I worked with Kexin for over a year. When everyone was stressed and worried, she was always a ray of sunshine and an incredibly hard working teammate. She brought positivity and joy to our team. Her dress up for Halloween brought many prizes for our team.

We went to a women in tech conference together for a week where we discussed our present aspirations and future goals. Her goals, hope and positivity will definitely rally through everyone she has met. My sincere condolences to her family and friends.

Sincere condolences on your loss. Kexin will forever be missed. May her soul Rest in Peace.

你来人间一趟
你要看看太阳

和你的心上人
一起走在街上

了解她
也要了解太阳

-- 海子 《夏天的太阳》

节哀。

噩耗总是那么突然 愿天堂没有痛苦
愿表妹一路走好
大姑节哀

欣赏豆豆的哥哥一胡金朋

娇：孩子，我和你妈妈一样爱你，你曾是我们的骄傲，过早的雕凌，使我们无法接受，但也不得不接受，这个天塌下来的现实，孩子，我无力控制住自己的泪水，我的心在滴血，孩子，如果我们能替代，我愿意，一路走好，我可爱的孩子………

爱你的文静姨