We have created this memorial website to honor his life, spirit, and to capture our memories of him.

Kinhthi is survived by his parents, Trâm and Jim Sanborn and sister Ayida with many extended Tran and Sanborn family members. 

Kinhthi was a student at El Camino Community College with the intent on studying Music and Cyber Security. He was a Redondo Union Highschool graduate. His love of music was the deepest connection with his long time friends. His light hearted spirit and comedic personality was magnetic and a great treasure among his peers. 

He was deep thinker and hobbies included music, gaming, meditating, running, rock climbing, and swimming at the beach. He also loved his beagle, Cody, and took great care of him.
Posted by Dao La on May 24, 2020
Hello Trâm, Jim & Ayida,
We are deeply sorry to hear about your loss. Life passes by so fast, especially when we are forced to move on without the one we love. We hope that our thoughts & prayers will lessen the burden you and your family carry on.

Vũ, Đào, Hân, Minh
Posted by TaRessa Gebhardt on May 24, 2020
Dear Tram, Jim and Ayida,
We are so sorry for your loss. There are no words that can convey our deepest sympathy for you. Please know we’ll always keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
Hiep and Taressa Ho
Posted by Doria Richardson on May 23, 2020
Dear Tram, Jim, and Ayida,

We are so sorry for the loss of Kinhthi.  We didn’t get to know him much. Through my(Doria) conversations with Trâm, as we shared common motherhood concerns, and the testimonies of family and friends, we got the sense of how special and loved Kinhthi was.  It takes a family to raise such a compassionate, kind, free spirited, genuine person, and for that you should be very proud. May pleasant memories of Kinhthi bring you joy and comfort. May God give you peace during this time.

Doria, Robert, and Gregory
Posted by Linda Gossage on May 22, 2020
Jim - I am deeply saddened by your loss. I will cherish all of the stories and memories that you have shared with me about Kinhthi since we met 19 years ago. Sending you and the family my deepest condolences, love and light.

Hold tight to memories for comfort
Lean on your friends and family for strength
And always remember how much you are loved my friend

Posted by Patricia Happy on May 22, 2020
I don't know that any words exist to encompass the grief your family must be enduring and we are so very sorry for your loss. Kinhthi had such a good sense of humor, which seems to be a wonderful trait that runs in your family. I hope that at times when the sorrow ebbs, fond memories of his wit provide some comfort. Love to you all,
The Happys
Posted by Khoi Tran on May 22, 2020
KinhThi. You touched so many lives with your zest for life and your beautiful smiles. You taught us how precious and how short life is, to make life meaningful and to live it fully. I learn much about you through the conversations with Mom Tram. She loved you deeply, on a level that few mothers can. Rest In Peace KinhThi.

Tram, Ayida and Jim, this loss is so great but KinkThi lives on. Our deepest condolences to you and to the entire family.
Nam Mô Tiếp Dẫn Đạo sư A Di Đà Phật.

OanhKhoi and family.
Posted by Sheri Fejeran on May 22, 2020
Jim, Tram and Ayuda:

From our family to yours, sending you our deepest condolences and warm thoughts with the loss of KinhThi! I remember when he was born and each year you'd walk to my house on Halloween to show him off :). I also remember when we were getting ready to sell the house before you left for South Carolina and I told him we were going to paint his room purple and pink. The loss of a child is one that we know personally and we found amazing support in our family and friends. We know that you will find the same as seen on this thread. We love you ❤️

Kin and Sheri Fejeran
Posted by Thi Thu Ha Nguyen on May 22, 2020
Xin chia buồn cùng gia đình Trâm.
Thương xót tiễn đưa cháu về cõi vĩnh hằng. Dì Hà, Nha Trang, bạn Mẹ Trâm.
Posted by Morgana Kennedy on May 21, 2020
Dear Sanborn Family, We are at a loss for words and are so deeply sorry for your loss. Kinhthi was a friend of my sons, through Redondo Union - and I was always happy when they would hang out because they always had such a good time filled with smiles, music and laughter. Such a joy to have in our lives!!! Our hearts are broken.
Praying for your healing, comfort, strength and peace during this painful time. Love, Rory, Morgana, George & Dane Kennedy
Posted by Mylan Nguyen on May 21, 2020
   It is with great sadness that we are saying goodbye to KinhThi. Was it not just 6 mos ago when we were altogether hanging out, playing games and pigging out on pizza?
   Jim, Tram and Ayida, we cannot fathom the depth of your pain. We are so sorry for your loss.
   Thinking of you all during this time of sorrow.
My-Lan, Phong, Ellie and Andrew
Posted by Jenny Ho on May 21, 2020
Dear Sanborn family,
Our deepest condolences to your family in the time of this great tragedy. Our family is sending all our love and prayers to yours. Kinhthi will be in our hearts and greatly missed.

Ho Family
Posted by Satoko Atha on May 21, 2020
I am so sorry, Tram. I love you and miss you and your smile.
We wish we could offer you something, anything but we are at a loss for words. We really don't know what to do and we know you don't either.
We will be here for you when you are ready. We are praying for you and your family and hope you all heal.

Love, Satoko, Dan & Umi
Posted by Tarmo Talts on May 22, 2020
Dear Jim, Tram and Ayida,

Our deepest condolences for the loss of your beloved son and brother. It is difficult to imagine the pain you are going through. We hope the memories of wonderful years you spent together with Kinhthi will bring some solace and peace to your hearts. Our thoughts are with you in these difficult times.

Tarmo, Ülle and family
Posted by Thuy Ho on May 21, 2020
I am honored to have known Kinh Thi. He was a sweet, friendly, handsome young man and I will miss him.
May he Rest In Peace.
Trâm, Jim, Ayida, and extended family, please accept my condolences.
My love and support will always be here for you.
Thúy Ngọc
Posted by Pearl Saffery on May 21, 2020
Though I did not know Kinhthi for very long, I had the pleasure of meeting him my senior year of high school through marching band. He was loved by everyone in the program. Such a genuine, funny, kindhearted person taken from us too soon. I will hold the memories I have of him close to my heart. My deepest condolences to the Sanborn Family. Kinhthi will be deeply missed.
Posted by Linda Tran on May 20, 2020
Dear Kinhthi,

My earliest memories of camping were watching movies together with you and Ayida in the RV. Thank you for being one of my first Van Lang friends and for bringing all of us closer together! I remember how you were always coming up with different ways to make us laugh - whether it be through your Temple Run commentary as you played, the way you narrated our Mafia games, or even showing us how you jumped over both your two arms at Di Nguyen's house!

Our family will miss you a lot, and we send our love and condolences to Di Tram, Uncle Jim, Ayida, and extended family.

Posted by Cynthia Knott on May 20, 2020
I am so very sorry for your loss. I remember celebrating Kinhthi’s first birthday with his parents and family. It was a lovely day. So many years have passed since I’ve seen your family. My son Buddy (Burton Weick) told me the terrible news today and my heart aches for you all and the loss of Kinhthi.

Dear Jim, Tran, and Ayida, I wish you comfort and peace in the love and memories of your beloved son and brother. 
With love, Cynthia Knott
Posted by David Terry Wagner on May 20, 2020
Dear Sanborn Family,

We were heartbroken to hear about Kinhthi. Our deepest condolences and all our prayers to you all. He was an amazing young man and will forever be remembered for his illuminating spirit, infectious smile, being a true friend, and loving brother and son.
With our heartfelt ❤️ love,
The Wagner Family -
Parras Friend Logan
Posted by Tracy Mintz on May 20, 2020
Dear Sanborn Family,
Our deepest and most heartfelt condolences. May his memory be a blessing.

With love from the Mintz Family, home of the infamous Kindergarten Kegger for the class of 2019.
Posted by Thanhthuy Nguyen on May 20, 2020
I have hard time to accept that Kinhthi is no longer with us. My deepest condolences to Tram, Jim, Ayida, and extended families. No words can describe your pain. I pray that you find strength to go through this extremely difficult time. May the beautiful memories of Kinhthi bring some ease and help you carry on. RIP, Kinhthi. You will be forever missed.
Dien,Thuy, and family
Posted by Kelly Tran on May 20, 2020
Dear Tram, Jim, and Ayida,

We are deeply saddened by the sudden and tragic loss of Kinhthi. My mom was rattled by this news. She was always fond of you guys, and especially Kinhthi and Ayida, have a special place in her heart. Eventhough I only met Kinhthi and Ayida a few times when they were little, I felt like I knew them because my mom used to talk about them all the time. She would tell me about the cute and silly things that they did and it made her chuckled or smiled. I know she treasures all those memories. I can't imagine the pain you're going through. May all the sweet memories you shared with Kinhthi bring some solace during this difficult time. Our thoughts are prayers are with you and wishing you the strength and peace now and the days to come. 

With deepest sorrow and sympathy,
Kelly & Yen "Bà Hạnh"
Posted by Marcus Martin on May 20, 2020

You were such a joy to spend time with. Your humorous and upbeat personality never failed to make everyone laugh. Every moment with you was a fun time. Out of the many memories I have with you, I especially remember the times we spent playing cards and watching Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory in the RV. Seeing you at the beach this past summer was amazing and I wish I could spend more time with you. I miss you Kinhthi, and my condolences to Di Tram, Uncle Jim, and Ayida.

Love, Marcus
Posted by Matthew Martin on May 20, 2020
Dear Kinhthi,

Every time that I saw you, you were always so positive and cheerful. Your humor made me laugh so many times! I had so many wonderful memories with you. From playing cards in the RV, biking, hiking, riding the ripstick, and eating marshmallows over the fire, no moment was ever dull with you. You brightened so many peoples' lives. I miss you, Kinhthi. Condolences to Uncle Jim, Di Tram, Ayida, and extended family members during this time.

Love, Matthew
Posted by Vicky Nguyen Ho on May 20, 2020
Dear Anh Jim, Chi Tram, and Ayida,

We are very saddened by the news of Kinh Thi's passing. Kinh Thi was fortunate to be born in a family with caring parents and sister and extended family members. We hope the beautiful memories of Kinh Thi will help you overcome this difficult time.   Nguyen and Nhut (Cuong's brother in law).
Posted by Jacqueline Morrison on May 20, 2020


I didn’t want to believe it and I still don’t. I remember you were such a fun and free spirited child. It was fun seeing you grow up into a cool kid before you moved; I didn’t know it would be the last time I’d see you though. It feels unreal that you’re gone, but you have many people here, including myself, that miss you. I always asked my mom how you were doing, but I should have reached out to you myself.

With love,
Your old neighbor; Jackie
Posted by Holly Skarda on May 20, 2020
Our thoughts are with you. May his memory continue to bring you joy for all the moments you shared.

- Kim and Holly Skarda
Posted by James Sanborn on May 20, 2020
To My Beautiful Kinhthi,

I will fall short of providing the words that truly describe how proud I am of you and who you have become. You never allowed your physical and emotional setbacks to define who you were as a person. Instead you leveraged those experiences in defining the man you had become. A truly respectful, gentle, witty, loving individual that YOU are.

You have touched the hearts and souls of so many around you. I will cherish the limited time we had together and forever hold you close to my heart. I will endure this unimaginable pain of losing you as a reminder of how fragile life is and how much I must embrace it.

I love you and will miss you so much my son.

-Your Loving Father
Posted by Kelly Dickson on May 20, 2020
Dear Kinhthi,

It's hard to put into words how much you mean to me and to our family. We grew up together and shared countless memories in Redondo, in the RV, on camping trips, at Easter Parties and Mud Runs, and everything in between. It'd be impossible to list out all the good memories but here are a few of my favorites that come to mind: accidentally drinking Mike's Hard Lemonade when we were 8 because we didn't know it had alcohol, singing Barbie Girl on your karaoke machine, you beating me every single time we played chess, and countless games of Mafia at every Van Lang get together (which you always narrated because no one could make the stories as entertaining as you). Your wit, kindness, and humor were unmatched and there was never, ever a dull moment when you were around. Thank you for being a caring, funny, and steadfast friend to me since we were babies. I'm lucky to have known you and will miss you so much. To Di Tram, Uncle Jim, and Ayida -- I'm thinking of you and sending love to you all during this tough time.

❤️ Kelly
Posted by Buu Nguyen on May 20, 2020
Chỉ mới mấy tháng trước gặp em dịp tết ở nhà cô Tú, cùng ăn uống và chơi song hường với đại gia đình. Khi chia tay em tối hôm đó, anh không thể nào ngờ đó là lần cuối cùng mình gặp nhau... Em ra đi, nhưng vẻ khôi ngô, tuấn tú và sự thông minh, thân thiện của em sẽ ở mãi trong lòng những người đã tiếp xúc em.

Gia đình con xin chia buồn cùng cô, chú và em Ayida. Chúng con không tưởng tượng được nỗi đau mà cô, chú và em Ayida đang phải trải qua, nhưng chúng con mong gia đình sẽ mạnh mẽ vượt qua nỗi đau này.
Posted by Kim Dickson on May 19, 2020
Where should we begin?  Our kids have pretty much grown up together. We spent countless vacations, camping trips and parties together. 
It was shocking to hear that Kinhthi has left us too young and too soon.  But his charm, his politeness and especially his smile will stay with us forever.
You will be missed Kinhthi!

Di Nguyen, Uncle Scott, Kelly and Kristin
Posted by Ngọc Vo on May 19, 2020
Dearest Trâm, Jim and Ayida,
We are at a loss for words during this sorrowful time!! We cannot begin to imagine what you are feeling, but let us share our heartfelt condolences. Please know that we are thinking of you all and praying for peace and comfort.
❤️ ❤️❤️
Gia đình chị Anh & Hạnh
Gia đình Phương & Phụng
Gia đình Trai & Tâm
Gia đình Ngọc & Linh
Posted by Trang Tran My on May 20, 2020
My Trang cầu mong cho cháu được về bên Chúa nhân từ và xin chân thành chia buồn với bạn Trâm .
Posted by Kelvin Lu on May 19, 2020
Please accept my heartfelt condolences, words cannot begin to express the sadness you are feeling right now, God rest his soul.
Phong & Ut
Posted by Claire Morrison on May 19, 2020
We all loved having Kinhthi in our lives, and we will miss his boundless energy, radiant smile, youthful innocence and heart of gold. We loved watching him grow up as our neighbor, and always looked forward to his surprise visits during Halloween after moving back to Redondo. Kinhthi has enriched everyone's life he has come in contact with, and he will be sorely missed. Kinhthi is a loveable soul who will never be forgotten.

-The Morrisons
Posted by Gao Gao on May 19, 2020
We are truly sorry for your loss, he was taken from us too soon. Our condolences to your family; may he never be forgotten.

From: Phil, Trang, Eric and Edin.
Posted by Darren Trieu on May 19, 2020
We are sending our sympathy and condolences to Di Tram and Jim. Kinh Thi was a wonderful boy and was always great to spend time with. He brought happiness to so many and that happiness will carry on forever.

Dora and Khang
Posted by Binh Nguyen on May 19, 2020
RIP Kinh Thi!

My deepest condolences to Tram, Jim, Ayida and all Extended Families.
Posted by Nam Nguyen on May 19, 2020
Kinh Thi,
Được cậu Cương báo tin má chị bàng hoàng cứ ngỡ là đang mơ. Bàng hoàng và đau xót. Em còn quá trẻ và chỉ mới bắt đầu một hành trình mới và để lại nỗi đau vô tận cho những người thương yêu em. Lần đầu gặp Kinh Thi là đám cưới của tụi chị lúc đó em mới hơn 1 tuổi. Em thích leo cầu thang và sau mỗi lần té là em lại leo tiếp và dù té đau cũng không khóc. Chú Jim bảo là em chỉ khóc khi chảy máu mà thôi. Lúc đó em đã gây ấn tượng cho mọi người ở đám cưới là một cậu bé vô vùng xinh xắn và gan dạ. Lần thứ 2 gặp Kinh Thi là ở Los Angeless khi gia đình chị qua thăm gia đình Kinh Thi cũng đã hơn 10 năm. Lúc này em là một cậu bé trai hơi nhút nhát nhưng rất dễ thương và đàn piano rất hay. Chỉ hai lần gặp ngắn ngủi nhưng chị vẫn luôn nhớ đến Kinh Thi. Gần đây nhất là cô Trâm chia sẻ hình của Kinh Thi chụp chung với chị em họ trong một tiệc cưới vô cùng vui vẻ và hồn nhiên. Chị vẫn không thể tin được là em đã không còn trên đời này. Chị có thể cảm nhận được nỗi đau của cô Trâm và chú Jim và những người thân yêu của em. Chị còn nhớ mới đây thôi cô Trâm đã bảo, cô không ước mơ gì lớn lao, chỉ có một mong ước bình dị là Kinh Thi luôn sống vui vẻ. Và chị cũng đồng ý là cho dù cuộc đời có bon chen thế nào thì cuối cùng quan trọng nhất vẫn là được vui vẻ và bình an. Em đến với cuộc sống này quá ngắn ngủi nhưng một sứ mệnh đã hoàn thành, em đã giúp những người ở lại nhận ra cuộc sống này ngắn ngủi biết bao. Ra đi thanh thản Kinh Thi nhé, chị tin là em đã hoàn thành một sứ mạng ở thế giới này và đang đi tìm một sứ mạng khác. Em hãy tin là những người thương yêu em ở thế giới này vẫn sẽ luôn cầu nguyện cho em.

Cô Trâm, chú Jim, Minh và Bé chia buồn cùng cô chú. Cuộc đời này không thể nói dài cũng không thể nói là ngắn, nhưng những gì cô chú đã làm cho Kinh Thi vượt xa những gì mà những bậc cha mẹ có thể làm được cho con. Tuy nhiên, sống chết đều có số, Bé hy vọng cô chú có thể vượt qua nỗi đau này và mong Kinh Thi ra đi thanh thản.

From Nam Nguyen, Austin, Texas.
Posted by Doantrang Martin on May 19, 2020
We just could not accept the fact that KinhThi is not here with us. We camped together, partied together at uncle Scott’s house, giggled with the group under the stars at the beach...yesterday. Have to spill my secret to others: you are my favorite boy with the soft voice and mischievous smiles, the most handsome boy in the group. I am forever grateful that I did tell you that.

19 years is too short but you did live the fullest life with people around you. Your family also did a wonderful job to be there for you. Rest In Peace my KinhThi. Love you and your family very much. You are forever lives in our hearts. 

You showed us life is fragile and full of uncertainties. We treasured the times we spent together with you, to grow with you...

Still can’t get to terms that you are not here physically with us!!! Sleep well baby ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Our condolences to Trâm, James, Ayida, and all the extended families for your lost. It’s too much, too suddenly!!! We are with you ...
Cô Trang, uncle Ed, Marcus and Matthew
Posted by Michael Neville on May 19, 2020
Such a tragedy. I pray you find the strength each day to manage the sorrow and pain.  My family grieves.
Posted by Gigi Tran on May 19, 2020
It is still difficult for us to accept that Kinhthi is no long here with us. A beautiful soul has been taken way too soon. RIP Kinhthi. Our heartfelt sympathies to Jim, Tram, Ayida and the extended family. Love you all.

Gigi, Tuan & Timothy
Posted by Thuy Dang on May 19, 2020
My deepest condolences to Tram,Jim,Ayida and your family.
May cherished memories and the passage of days bring healing peace to your heart.
Chị Thuỷ và 2 cháu.
Posted by Hoa Vo on May 19, 2020
Still having a really hard time accepting this reality; it's just unimaginable! I can't even imagine the pain Tram, Jim, and Adyda are going through. I could only hope that you are able to find strength during this dark time.

RIP Kinh Thi!
Posted by Emme Sanborn on May 19, 2020
I have searched for words, poems, music; anything that may express my sadness at the loss of such a unique, full of life, and determined young man. But there are none. The loss is too much, too soon, too deep, too unanswered. 
And yet I feel Kinhthi's spirit has moved on from this life with peace and grace to another calling without us for now. He does live on with us here on Earth in the smiles and laughter he elicited, memories shared. He was too big to just silently leave us.
And so I remember him saying his first word: chocolate, so very clearly over the phone with Jim groaning in the background knowing he'd have a challenge getting him off the topic after we hung up; his child's eyes so full of mischief and joy playing with his cousins at reunions; climbing up the rock cliffs of the Colorado mountains as if he was born to do it, so nimble and quick; playing cards around a campfire, his mind racing 1000 mph ahead of mine, a smile quirked on his mouth. 
These are but glimpses of a young man who lived his life on his terms, short as it may have been here with us. May he feel the warmth of the love we have for him always.
Posted by Huy Pham on May 19, 2020
Hi Trâm,

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

Huy Hạnh
Posted by Julia Behrenbeck on May 19, 2020
A young man, a grown boy
Our son, brother, grandson, nephew, cousin, friend
A happy boy, so pure and innocent
A young man; intelligent, searching, learning
He liked to play chess, he found passion at the keyboard
He appreciated things in their place
And now suddenly gone; what, how, why?
We mourn, we cry, we want to fix it
Most of all, we want to be together
The family, memories, reunions, friends
In our hearts, always there; a way to breathe, a way to soften the hurt

Dear Jim, Trâm and Aiyda - We mourn the loss of Kinhthi with his beautiful smile and twinkle in his eye. Some day soon we will be able to be together for hugs and comfort. We always look forward to our time and visits with you. Know that our love and hearts are with you and Kinhthi always.

Julia and Thomas
Posted by Rachel Klismith Klismith on May 19, 2020
Dear Jim Tram and Aida,

This terrible loss of such a sweet person is hard to undertand. I hope the tears that we cry can somehow subtract from your pain.
                         Aunt Rachel
Posted by Hanh Vu on May 19, 2020
Dear Tram, James and Ayida,

Anh Cuong, chi Anh and cac chau (Hanh, Khang, Sy, and be GM) want to express our deepest condolences for your loss. There are no words to ease your pain and sorrow but I hope you can find solace in 19 wonderful years of memories with Kinhthi and the love and support among family and friends. We wish you strength during this extremely difficult time. 

Gia dinh Cuong/Anh
Posted by Diep Tran on May 19, 2020
We send our love and energy to help you through this very sad time in your life.
From Ray, Diep, Long, and Trang.
Posted by Lien Ton Nu My on May 19, 2020
Cô chú là bạn học của mẹ Trâm, đã 02 lần cô chú gặp KinhThi khi cháu theo mẹ về thăm quê hương Việt Nam. Cô chú vô cùng thương tiếc khi nghe tin cháu đã xa rời trần thế. Cô chú nguyện cầu hương hồn cháu sớm siêu thoát về cõi Phật. Nam mô Tiếp dẫn đạo sư A di Đà Phật.
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Recent Tributes
Posted by Dao La on May 24, 2020
Hello Trâm, Jim & Ayida,
We are deeply sorry to hear about your loss. Life passes by so fast, especially when we are forced to move on without the one we love. We hope that our thoughts & prayers will lessen the burden you and your family carry on.

Vũ, Đào, Hân, Minh
Posted by TaRessa Gebhardt on May 24, 2020
Dear Tram, Jim and Ayida,
We are so sorry for your loss. There are no words that can convey our deepest sympathy for you. Please know we’ll always keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
Hiep and Taressa Ho
Posted by Doria Richardson on May 23, 2020
Dear Tram, Jim, and Ayida,

We are so sorry for the loss of Kinhthi.  We didn’t get to know him much. Through my(Doria) conversations with Trâm, as we shared common motherhood concerns, and the testimonies of family and friends, we got the sense of how special and loved Kinhthi was.  It takes a family to raise such a compassionate, kind, free spirited, genuine person, and for that you should be very proud. May pleasant memories of Kinhthi bring you joy and comfort. May God give you peace during this time.

Doria, Robert, and Gregory
his Life


Kinhthi came into this world 9 days late. His mom had finished a jigsaw puzzle of many exotic frogs, while waiting for him to come. Since birth, he was always a rebel and a life-seeker. 

He grew up in Redondo Beach, he loved the water, his friends, and his life. He attended Jefferson Elementary School, Parras Middle School, Redondo Union High School, and was going to El Camino Community College. When he was young, Kinhthi was a big troublemaker, whilst being a smart student. In middle school, he learned how to hack through the school's firewall and go onto the dark web. His parents were called to the school and were given a 4 inch thick stack of paperwork. 

Growing up with a large extended family on both his mother's and father's side, Kinhthi never was "alone," and always had someone to hangout with, or talk to. He was close with his cousins and often kept in touch with them, even when they lived far apart. He had many memories with all his cousins including performing Ayida and Uy's Wedding, hiking in the Rocky Mountains, and the countless Tran and Sanborn family reunions.  

Since family was such an avid idea in his life, it is no doubt that family was so important to him. Every time there were family issues, he would always step in to try to relieve it. He would talk to each of his family members about it and make sure they were truly okay. He had such a mesmerizing way with words that one would always understand what he was talking about and they'd know he'd always understand what they were talking about or going through. Kinhthi and his father always knew they both loved and cared for each other and would do anything for the happiness of the other. They had this unspoken communication and understanding  between each other and were a good team. His relationship with his sister, started out like any other sibling relationship, endless fighting. He would always tease her relentlessly, but deep down he loved her to the core. In the last years of his life, they had outgrown their childish habits and reached a deep understanding of each other only they'd know. Kinhthi had an especially unique relationship with his mother. During his late teen years when they lived apart from each other, they would stay up late at night talking about their problems, their relationships, their friends, their family, and their everyday lives to update each other on what's up. Kinhthi was someone who wasn't afraid to say what's on his mind, so whenever his mom was giving him shit, he would always call her out on it, thus building a devoted and meaningful relationship to each other. 

Kinhthi’s friends were of the utmost importance to him. They made up an integral part of who he is. During Kinhthi’s free time, he'd always choose to spend it with his best friend, Jonathan. The two were inseparable, and their friendship and close bond was very obvious to anyone that knew them. When he moved to South Carolina, they kept in touch and despite being thousands of miles apart, their friendship never wavered. Kinhthi then moved back to California, and thus began a new chapter in his life. He was convinced to join the school’s marching band, an activity very foreign to him at the time. He instantly became loved and admired by the entire band, and people were fascinated by his unapologetic way of being himself. He made many close friends during this time, who can all say that Kinhthi was someone who they could confide in, and there was not a judgemental bone in his body. Not only was he truly caring, and considerate, but he was incredibly entertaining and fun to be around. His humor was unique to him, and people constantly had their phones out to film his next move. Without realizing it, people began to adopt his goofy mannerisms and sense of humor. There was a little bit of Kinhthi in all of his friends. He truly was the glue that held together his friend group, and he made people feel comfortable and safe when around him. 

Kinhthi grew up into a man whom everyone admired and left a deep mark on anyone he met. He was a person never afraid of consequences and lived his life to the fullest. He was one who wouldn't have a plan and  instead would be spontaneous and have fun. He lived life with no regrets and was a walking icon to the people around him. His carefree nature and empathetic personality always drew people to him. Kinhthi would always make an effort to make sure people never felt alone, and he always knew the right things to say to people who were feeling down, and even just his presence could cheer someone up. Kinhthi was truly someone who was so capable of empathy, a trait rarely found in today's world. Kinhthi was truly the only person of his kind and will be forever missed, and his legacy remembered and celebrated.

Recent stories

Living without you

Shared by James Sanborn on May 26, 2020

A few days have past since your service. I suppose as funerals go, it went okay. What I took away from it was the incredible impact you made to the people around you. How you made it a point to look out for the underdog. Parents of your friends have contacted me directly to share their story of how you brought their child out of their shell. You don't know how good that makes me feel given the current circumstances. 

The service made your departure a reality for your mother, Ayida and myself. It was a bitter pill to swallow. With more time on my hands to think about you the harder it has become to let go.

Your sister Ayida, has been such a comfort to your mother. Although grieving herself, she musters up the strength and courage to provide the shoulder for your parents to cry on. She is truly a special child. The world is a better place because of you two. Through all of the craziness of the past few years between your mother and I, you two kept things in perspective and never let it negatively affect you. I don't know what I would have done without you two.

With all of the stress of preparing for the service gone my body has reached a point where enough is enough. I contracted some sort of virus. Strep I believe. And it has really thrown me for a loop. Everyone is nervous that its more serious than it appears. I hope not. So far so good. 

I find myself frustrated at things. As you know I had a short temper to begin with, but now I'm even more easily agitated. I think because I'm truly afraid of facing the feelings I should be feeling during a lose like this. I don't know. Its worse in the morning because the only thing I can think about is you and how much I miss you. This has put me on a course with depression. Any fun activity I can think of at this time, is muted due the sadness that hangs over me on a constant basis.

I'm sure there will come a time when this grey cloud will pass. Talking with friends that have been through such losses, they say that it becomes of a process of accepting that the sadness of the loss always stays with you. You just learn how to deal with it better. 

I'm not sure what my path will look like, so many unfortunate events have taken place recently in my life that I have become numb. To the point where I don't really care what happens to me physically, financially, emotionally... 

What keeps me from jumping off the cliff is the desire to protect what remains of our family. To make sure your sister has all of the opportunities she deserves in life. To make sure your mother, even though we don't always see eye to eye, has someone to lean on during these difficult times.  But for myself, at this particular time, I just don't know.  I just don't care.

Kinhthi, Before You Go..

Shared by James Sanborn on May 22, 2020
  Kinhthi I wanted to talk to you before you go. Your family and friends have all gathered here to see you off. We all wanted a chance to voice what we wish we had said while you were with us and simply say, “goodbye”.

We all wanted a chance to describe the positive impact you made in our lives.

What you meant to us.

How reflecting on the past helped us to better understand who you were and why you were put on this earth and perhaps maybe just maybe why you were taken from us so early.

Your family and friends are here today to wish you farewell and share their experiences with you. Today we will all understand how we became better parents, siblings, cousins, grandparents, friends because of you and how you enriched all our lives. We want to tell you how wonderful you made us feel when you were around, and how special a human being you are.

I hope that you understand how difficult it is for us to have to gather in this way. Please be patience with us. We are all trying to cope with this new reality. Many adjustments still to be made as we strive to live a life worthy of your love and respect.

I would like to share with you some of my own personal observations.

Kinhthi, you have always been an original.

Not many people in this world get to live their life like you did. That is, on your own terms. Even when pressured by your parents to follow someone's concept of a social norm. Take school attendance for example. Well maybe not. Let us not go there!

I remember the night you sat me down and described to me your philosophy of life. Granted I thought you were trying to rationalize why you did not need to do your homework or go to class. But I could hear, that in your mind, you had to understand cause and effect. Your world had to be organized and a certain order maintained for you to make sense of it all.

Even the smallest details of your life were organized. We checked out your clothes drawer the day you left us and check out your underwear drawer. I have never seen underwear folded to such exacting specifications as yours.

I must admit that I did not follow everything you said. I guess that was because of how lucky I felt that we were able to spend the time together. I will miss that very much.

As children go, you were an easy child to raise during those first few years. You rarely cried, always in good spirits trying to take in as much as you could. You started sleeping through the night at 5 weeks. Thus, luring your parents into a false sense of security thinking that this parenting gig was way too easy. Aside from the occasional misstep, raising you over the past 19 years has been one of the easiest most fulfilling experiences I have ever had.

You were always a fan of the comic book superheroes. I believe Batman was your favorite. Like any superhero, I believe each child has their own superpower: yours was the ability to focus on a singular activity while blocking out anything that would distract you from carrying out your mission. I often wondered if your mother and I did the right thing by keeping you in public school rather than finding a school that would cater to the way in which you learned. As early as the fifth grade, we noticed something different. Your teacher came to us and said that you went from being a “A” student to a student who did not turn in their homework and was always tired in class. Your mother and I thought that perhaps you were sick or having issues with other students at school. Weeks later we discovered the root cause of the problem. …. “Origami”

While cleaning out your room, your mother came across what appeared to be a bunch of folded up paper under your bed. Upon closer inspection, it was not just crumpled up trash, it was meticulously crafted origami stars, birds, flowers, cubes, and other origami forms. We marveled at how you had taken the time to master the artistry of each piece you made. That is when your mother and I realized that you learn differently than others. We even entertained the idea of finding a school that would promote your superpower.

I know that, given your situation, we did the right thing. Keeping you close to your friends. Allowing you to develop socially was as important or even more so than taking a chance at a different school. A difficult lesson learned for your mother and I as we saw you struggle making friends in fitting in in Charleston. Let alone, having to suffer through a misdiagnosed appendicitis and spending three weeks in the hospital. We watched you physically and emotionally slide in a downwards direction. What got you through this, was the bond you had with your friend Jonathan who stayed up late at night on the west coast to talk about the subjects that you were taking at school and what college you were going to attend after high school. Right Jonathan?

It was a difficult time in your life but having established such a deep relationship with your friend you made it through. Lifelong friendships such as yours with Jonathan are incredibly rare. In the recent days, I got a chance to chat with your friends and their parents. You made an indelible impression on them. Your untimely departure will forever leave a hole in their lives that will never be filled.

Jonathan, you, and your family meant the world to Kinhthi. You were there when he needed you the most. It was because of your family’s love that I believe he did not digress further than he did. Tram, Ayida and I will forever be in debt to you and your family. We cannot thank you enough.

Kinhthi, not only did you learn what it meant to be a great friend, but you learned what it meant to be a wonderful brother.

You began your relationship with your sister Ayida, in typical form, making sure you got some sort of reaction from her as you teased and harassed her. The kind of stuff little boys do to their sister to get a reaction. (We have evidence on display. Sorry man!)

As your relationship with your sister developed, I noticed that each of you developed your superpowers in a very complementary way. Where one fell short, the other mastered. For example, your math abilities and her reading comprehension. I tried to constantly remind you after each harassing session, that someday you will see Ayida for who she is. Understand how important she is in your life. To stay close to her, leverage her and she will leverage you. I knew the two of you will make a great team someday. Your mother and I are happy that you two became close these past few years. That you managed to develop a bond with your sister Ayida. A relationship that she recognized as her gold standard from which to compare future connections. Thank you for being there for her. It means a lot to your mother and me.

Living on separate coasts these past few years, your mother and Ayida in Charleston and You and I in Redondo, presented several challenges as well as unique opportunities. Upon moving out here I got to see you completely turn your live around 180 degrees in a positive direction. It was wonderful seeing you out with your friends engaging in band. Such a contrast from the previous years in Charleston. Although I was there physically, you continued to develop your relationship with your mother over the phone. I got to see the physical you; however, your mother got to see the inner you. You and your mother spent long nights talking about mother son topics. It gives me immense comfort knowing that you and your mother were able to nurture such a close relationship.

Well I must now hand off to you mother and the others waiting for their turn to say goodbye. But before I do, I need to tell you that I do not necessarily subscribe to the notion that your spirit is taken by the heavens. I believe that one’s spirit collectively exists in all who knew you and loved you. That each of us you left behind, received our own special spirit-gift (for a lack of term) custom tailored to our cherished memories of time we spent with you. Your family and friends thank you very much for this gift.

Kinhthi you are the best son any parent could wish for.

I thank you for all the love and joy you provided during your short time here on earth.

I will miss you dearly my son. There will not be a day that goes by where I will not be thinking of you. I will forever love you.

Your heartbroken father.

Shared by Doantrang Martin on May 22, 2020
Neither Coming nor Going
This body is not I
I’m not trapped within its bone and flesh
I am the limitless life force
That which has never been born
And has never died
Immense oceans and myriad stars upon the sky
Are all infused with that same Primordial Awareness
As That, I’ve always been eternally free
Life and death are but the doors
In and Out
A game 
Of hide and seek
Cry with me
Laugh with me
Wave goodbye
And then instantly welcome me back
We’ll meet again today
We’ll meet again tomorrow
We are forever meeting one another at the source 
In every moment of this boundless existence

Translated from “ Không Đến Không Đi”

Thích Nhất Hạnh

Không Đến Không Đi

Thân này không phải là tôi
Tôi không kẹt vào nơi thân ấy
Tôi là sự sống thênh thang
Chưa bao giờ từng sinh mà
cũng chưa bao giờ từng diệt
Này đây biển rộng trời cao
Muôn vàn tinh tú lao xao
Tất cả đều biểu hiện tôi từ
nguồn linh tâm thức
Tự muôn đời tôi vẫn tự do
Tử sinh là cửa ngõ ra vào
Tử sinh là trò chơi cút bắt
Hãy khóc cùng tôi
Hãy cười với tôi
Hãy vẫy tay chào để rồi tức thì gặp lại
Gặp lại hôm nay
Gặp lại ngày mai
Chúng ta đang gặp nhau nơi suối nguồn
Chúng ta sẽ gặp nhau từng phút giây trên muôn ngàn nẻo sống.

Thích Nhất Hạnh