ForeverMissed
Created in memory of our loved ones: Larry & Mag aka Dad & Mum aka Grampa & Granma aka GreatPaPop & Greatma ... you are in our hearts, with us forever ...

Tributes are short messages commemorating Larry and Mag, or an expression of support to her closest family and friends. Leave your first tribute here, and others will follow.

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Fussy Ol' Man

Shared by Elsa Tan on July 22, 2021
My grandpa is the fussiest, grumpiest old man i know! but that said its his personality and its what makes him unique! he is a dear fellow who has the kindest heart despite such a nasty front. I will always remember even during the last few times I saw both my grandparents before we were totally banned from visiting he always shoos me off! not because he didn't want to see me but more because he was concerned for us...:-(

I will always remember him as a very traditional, pious taoist who was very particular about all the prayer rites and traditional customs handed down by his ancestors. I try to keep up with the customs and traditions where possible and try to pass it down to my little daughter. My memories of him and his 9 emperor God beliefs and his ancestral worship is priceless, also all the chinese customary celebrations and the traditons behind them his legacy to me. If I'm not wrong, at one point of time in life he was about to die at a young age due to a heart attack, a father of 4 young children. According to my grandma, she and all her children knelt down and begged the Emperor of Heaven to save his life and they made a promise to the Emperor of Heaven to put a 1sen coin at the temple of the Emperor of Heaven of the age grandpa was that year and that is what grandma does for grandpa every year. Without fail. Keeping the promise. Since then, grandpa becomes more religious and prayerful too and both have always made sure to put God as their 1st priority.

He was rather hateful when we were young, scaring all our firends away...especially guy friends. But he mellowed down as he aged and although still not fond of us having friends of the opposite sex he become a rather impressionable old man when they met him instead.

Other than being such a fierce person my grandpa to his friends was actually a real practical joker. I heard he purposely got married on 1st April so that he could play a joke on his friends. It was such a joke that his frineds didn't believe him and didn't show up thinking he was pulling their leg. When I heard about it I was pretty upset...I asked my grandma how does she feel about him doing that? cause for me I would have been super angry! but my grandma seems to be able to accept it in her stride and just smiled a small smile at the memory of it. i think she must have been so in love with this joker! grandma says grandpa wanted to make fun of his friends. So every year on April fools's day my grandparents would have been celebrating their wedding anniversary but none would believe that..even till today I find it hard to believe, thats why they never celebrated their wedding anniversary ever as well! Maybe it was his way of doing away with wedding anniverseries Hooha plus also something he won't forget.

Then there are the many many stories of our family and our extended family and stories of relatives and the past which he shared with me. I might co-write a book of it one day with my mum, I would call it Grandfather, Grandmother Stories! how apt that would be.

by Natalie Low, eldest granddaughter.

Teenage Angst, Adult Appreciation

Shared by Elsa Tan on July 22, 2021
My Dad ruined my life when I was a teenager and even as a young adult.  I was never allowed to go ANYWHERE!  Most (more accurate to say "ALL") social activities were disallowed.  This meant anything that involved boys, who would have been shot if guns were allowed in Melaka, where I was born and raised.  He even patrolled my all-girl convent school when I had band practice, the utter embarrassment!  That was just the kind of utterly old fashioned, aggressively fierce, and obsessively protective father he was.

Oh, how I hated him . . . then.

I never appreciated him until I went to work in Singapore.  And as I got older, I realised that there were so many times when he showed how much he loved me, which I foolishly took for granted.  Like when I drove his van up a curb whilst practicing for my driving test.  The van had to be lifted off the curb by a passing group of guys (so shy!).  I went home on jelly knees, expecting a big telling off when I told him about the incident and the resulting dragging metal sound from the bottom of the van.  All he said was, "Oh, that's how you learn mah.  Never mind, I will check the van."  And that was that.  I passed the test the next day, mind you!

When I was a kid, I went to my aunt's place after school as both my parents had to work.  My father was an alcoholic then.  But no matter how drunk he was, he never forgot to pick me up and bring me home.  It would be known as child endangerment now, of course.  My whole life, he only lifted his hand to me once and I must say that I deserved it then, brat that I was!

Most profoundly, when I found the man I wanted to marry and told my parents that he was a divorcee with 2 young boys, all my utterly old fashioned, aggressively fierce, and obsessively protective father said was, "As long as he treats you well and makes you happy, it's ok."  (Flashback the van moment!).  Looking back, that was his way of love.  Tough and hardly perfect, but his way.

The times when I needed him most, he never failed to surprise me with the depth of his love.  And in my heart, I knew it throughout all the ruckus he made, the tantrums I threw, the shouting matches we had, the aggravation we put each other through.  And I know it now.

Oh, how I love and miss him . . . for always.