Thinking of you today on your birthday, Mom, and recalling that statement you liked so much that Mimi said years ago...”Remember me as I was”. I am. Thank you for being the beautiful person you were, for the amazing mom you were, and for all the love and devotion you poured into us kids. I love you so much! 

A memory today of a special time with Mom and Larry - singing Messiah together up at the Music Center one Christmas about 15 years ago (where we saw many shows and heard many symphonies growing up). It was hard for me to post anything on the 7th of this month, a little too close to the heart. But seeing this photo brings me back around to the wonderful, joyous times shared in all the 55 years I had with our incredible Mom.
I sang Messiah with a choir about 2 years ago, to honor Mom's memory and to capture the joy of learning and sharing that beautiful music with her. In fact, I always have and always will think of Mom when I sing. She was my greatest cheerleader and fan. I still feel her pride and see her glowing face whenever I perform, and the sweet flowers she would often bring me; her excitement in handing them to me. What a Mom.
I have a beautiful butterfly garden dedicated to her in my yard. I hope she loves those flowers and butterflies. I think it's time to go and sit there awhile.  

Another Anniversary - "tempus fugit" as you often said! You are remembered each day and loved always.

...loved being a grandma!!!

Family camping- great memories!

Spontaneous, fun, adventurous- what a great Mom!!!

Our Mom was so brave, such a great role model for the three of us.

On this the second anniversary of your passing, I went down to the beach at dusk and placed a flower in the waves. It was taken away too quickly. I am grateful to you for so many things, and I carry in my innermost parts a peace and assurance that despite suffering and loss, you are in God's hands and your lovely spirit is in His care.  The years pass quickly, but the memories sustain. So many of us love and miss you. Be at Peace Mom.

Cheryl, the photo you uploaded of the fall leaves feels so appropriate to me on many levels.  Lulu loved collecting these leaves. Their transformation in late life is revealed in such beauty; invdividuals depart the tree and create the rich conditions under which new growth and new life will flourish. It's all part of God's plan and the circle of life of which each of us has been blessed to experience and celebrate.

I have many happy reflections tonight as we begin 2014. This Christmas mirror ball ornament on my tree reminds me of the huge mirror ball of Times Square on New Year's Eve. Growing up, we would all gather around the TV and wait, in great anticipation, for Guy Lombardo to lead us in the countdown and watch that magical ball descend and usher in a new year.Then the great exchange of  hugs, kisses and sometimes a taste of cold duck in a waterford crystal glass. Although the cast of participants has changed over the years, I still hear their laughter, see their smiles, and feel the warmth and the joy of those special moments shared. Here's to all the wonderful memories of the past and to those that lie ahead. Happy New Year to all and I raise a special glass overflowing with love to you, Mom.

Today marks one month since Lulu's passing.  This website does not allow responses to comments; othewise I would have reached out to so many of you to thank you so much for sharing your thoughts & prayers and honoring Louise.

About a year ago, Lulu read this poem aloud at Cheryl's. It obviously had great meaning to her, and was written many years ago by her mother Carolyn Magill Phipps Watts (Mimi). I'll include the poem below; perhaps you will find comfort in it too.  The photo is of my mom visiting her parents gravesite in Kensico Cemetary, NY.

Here's the poem:

"No matter what happens, Nature continues producing the seasons, and June comes, always. When things go wrong with us personally or with the world at large, in a month like June, remember the timid but insistent sound of bird cries in the dead of winter and remember that there is no time when we do not meet challenges , no time when there is not need for courage, hope and trust. As the bird trusts in Spring, as the bird trusts that nourishment will be found for him during the bleak, bitter months, let us learn also that we too can trust, whatever the problem, and whatever the climate of the tired heart.

Grief, loss, anxiety - all comose a part of our living on earth; but there is always a song in the coldest winter, a ray of light in the darkened sky, and always, eventually, if we are patient, June.

As one grows older the seasons slide one into the other and are shortened; hardly has the Christmas tree come down, denuded of ornaments, before we are deep into Winter, early Spring, promising Easter, and then, June. 

Wherever you go, whatever you do this June, remember that in the heart's own seasons, no matter what the calendar says, it can always be June.

So, be hopeful, be happy."

Those of you who were fortunate enough to dine with Louise at one of her holiday dinners will remember her amazing tables - festive does not begin to describe the attention to detail and spirit of celebration, from personalized place settings to candles everywhere.  Her tables were the expression of a loving and artful spirit.

I have a somewhat odd story. I shared with some of you recently that my mother's favorite number was 26 (even though it should have been 7)!

On Saturday I was photographing an event in Pasadena. As the couple were entering their limo, I noticed a quarter on the sidewalk. Although racing, I remember thinking to myself "a quarter is a quarter" and I reached down and pocketed the coin.  Less than an hour later, at a different location I looked down and spotted a penny. 

I'm not particularly superstitious, but finding 26 cents in less than an hour on the sidewalk is almost beyond coincidence. That realization hit me just as I spotted the penny, and at that moment I had the distinct and overpowering feeling that my mom was with me in spirit and was reassuring that all would be okay. An odd story, but the feeling of her presence nearly knocked me over and I will cherish and carry that memory the rest of my days.

     When I was 23 years old, Mom and I had a small conversation that made a huge impact on my life. I had flown from the East Coast to be home for two days at Christmastime, soon needing to hasten back to my dream job: performing in a National Tour of "Annie". Before getting "Annie", I had just completed another long National Tour (of "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers") and although I LOVED the work, I was frankly exhausted and homesick. I remember saying to Mom something like," I love all this, but I am so tired and I just don't think I can go on anymore. I think I'm going to quit the show ". Mom looked me in the eye with those beautiful blue eyes, smiled gently and said," You can quit if you want. But years from now, when you look back on this experience, all you'll remember is that you quit." Wow. That's wisdom.
     Well, I didn't quit the show. I snapped out of it, and continued on to have the time of my life performing. Ever since then, when I face a challenge that seems unsurmountable, I know that I can make it because I'm a finisher, not a quitter.         Thanks, Mom.

Louise enjoyed taking walks around Las Palmas the past couple of years. When I'd visit, she always shared some prized leaves she'd collected on her walks.  We'd put them in her bathroom sink and photograph them on my iPhone. 

Each leaf tells a unique story. These are not bright green and new, but have seen many seasons. As they have aged and fallen from the tree their unique aspects have emerged. 

And they are still quite beautiful to behold.