I met Michael the very first evening he had been admitted to the hospital...the same day he had learned about his challenging diagnosis.
That very same evening, Michael had introduced me to his loved ones - GiGi & Jeff.
The time of year was Christmas time, and on that evening, I sat with Michael in his room in the wee hours of the morning; we watched the sun rise over the frigid cold Buffalo skyline. The city's landscaped had just been washed over with a fresh blanket of snow.
As with most patients, Michael, GiGi, and Jeff researched all their options for Mike, and were heading to Boston for treatment.
I thought of Michael often during that time. He was a patient and a person I was immediately drawn to. It helped, greatly, that our personalities and sarcastic wit played off one another.
Roughly 6 months or so later, I ran into GiGi and Mike at the same hospital, and inside of its lobby. Mike was walking, and as soon as our eyes met, his face lit up with excitement from us simply recognizing one another. GiGi was excited to see me too, and I her. Our reunion was brief, but a happy one seeing as they both informed me of Michael's great news about remission....Boston had been a success. I breathed a momentary sigh of relief at this news.
Fast forward another number of months, and Michael was admitted again. The cancer was back, & he was no longer in remission. The next plan of action was chemotherapy and gamma knife.
One thing I loved about Michael, and as frustrating as it was from a health care perspective, he always tried so incredibly hard to be brave...to not show any signs of weakness or worry.
I KY. to the side of my professional role, and could easily tell how scared Michael was about his first round of chemotherapy. The universe intervened in Michael's care, and it somehow appointed me his nurse for his very first cycle of chemotherapy. All 4 days.
I'll be honest, the first day or two Michael did incredible. But by day 3, we could all see the horrific side affects of the chemo wreaking havoc on Michael's body.
Luckily, GiGi and Jeff were always by his side. I continued to try my hardest to explain medication processes, procedures, etc to all three of these amazing people. Michael kicked chemotherapy's ass!
That was my last full involvement in Michael's care. As a nurse, we very often remember a majority of our patients - but the patients don't always necessarily remember us; and the same goes with their family members, too. But the fact is, no matter what else was going on during Michael's stay on my floor, I always found the time to hang out with the 3 amigos. Dungeness, we'd all be laughing hysterically - to the point of tears - that we anyways had to ensure his room doot was closed during these times....so as not to inadvertently offend anyone.
My most treasured memories with Michael very often involve him and I just sitting in the dark throughout the night. Sometimes we discussed music, our favorite bands, movies, etc. But the great thing about our friendship was the fact that we could both just sit there; in Andale blissfully peaceful silence, and be comfortable and enjoy one anothers company.
During the last year, I followed Michael's disease progression through the writings and updates of GiGi, Jeff, and Michael himself, on his dedicated Facebook page.
Watching from the sidelines was incredibly difficult & heartbreaking; but I knew, at the time, that it was the professionally sound route of action to take. Surely this doesn't mean that I casted for Michael, GiGi, and Jeff. It just meant that I had the upmost faith and respect for GiGi and Jeff standing up, and dedicating their own lives, to be Michael's caregiver. They dud snd indescribably, beautiful & courageous job.
Although Michael's time here on earth is done, and the fact that many hearts are left empty and lonely today...we can at least find strong comfort reading the words on this memorial page. And for that, I feel as though Michael will continue his legacy forever.
You were one of a kind Michael; and so are the loves of your life. As time progresses, I can promise you that I will remember our time together, forever. And in the still of a quite night...one with no need for conversation or external stimuli....I'll smile to myself knowing you're near & enjoying the fleeting moment with me.
Until we meet again,.
Your forever friend,
Ashley
