ForeverMissed
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Tributes
November 11, 2022
November 11, 2022
Thinking of you today, Uncle Michael, and hoping you know how loved and missed you are.


A Meeting
by Edith Wharton

On a sheer peak of joy we meet;
Below us hums the abyss;
Death either way allures our feet
If we take one step amiss.

One moment let us drink the blue
Transcendent air together—
Then down where the same old work's to do
In the same dull daily weather.

We may not wait . . . yet look below!
How part? On this keen ridge
But one may pass. They call you—go!
My life shall be your bridge.

November 11, 2022
November 11, 2022
Thinking of you today Michael, and remembering how strong and inspiring you were as both an older brother and a young man entering the Air Force during a very turbulent time in our country. I'm sure that's why you come to mind at least once a day, usually when I'm experiencing my own meaningless challenges or concerns. and I hear your voice in my ear responding with the brand specific faith and optimistic words you always managed to inspire me with when you were here : "Ya never know Margo" .....and "No guts, no glory". Happy Birthday Michael and most importantly, thanks for your service....to all of us.
March 29, 2022
March 29, 2022
A full trip around the Sun without you Michael and nothing is the same. I think of you every day as well as our deep conversations about the spirituality of the Universe, Christmas on Ganymede, and your inspired ideas about our place in the vast cosmic scheme of things. Needless to say, your passion for the stars became my passion for the Cosmos and for that reason I will always be grateful to you--the first Astronomer in my life--the thoughtful and patient stargazer who always had time for his curious, but somewhat scientifically-challenged siblings.

This beautiful poem by Sarah Williams is a tribute to who and what you will always be to me.

The Old Astronomer (To His Pupil)

Reach me down my Tycho Brahé, – I would know him when we meet,
When I share my later science, sitting humbly at his feet;
He may know the law of all things, yet be ignorant of how
We are working to completion, working on from then to now.

Pray remember that I leave you all my theory complete,
Lacking only certain data for your adding, as is meet,
And remember men will scorn it, ‘tis original and true,
And the obloquy of newness may fall bitterly on you.

But, my pupil, as my pupil you have learned the worth of scorn,
You have laughed with me at pity, we have joyed to be forlorn,
What for us are all distractions of men’s fellowship and wiles;
What for us the Goddess Pleasure with her meretricious smiles.

You may tell that German College that their honor comes too late,
But they must not waste repentance on the grizzly savant’s fate.
Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light;
I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.

What, my boy, you are not weeping? You should save your eyes for sight;
You will need them, mine observer, yet for many another night.
I leave none but you, my pupil, unto whom my plans are known.
You “have none but me,” you murmur, and I “leave you quite alone”?

Well then, kiss me, – since my mother left her blessing on my brow,
There has been a something wanting in my nature until now;
I can dimly comprehend it, – that I might have been more kind,
Might have cherished you more wisely, as the one I leave behind.

I “have never failed in kindness”? No, we lived too high for strife,–
Calmest coldness was the error which has crept into our life;
But your spirit is untainted, I can dedicate you still
To the service of our science: you will further it? you will!

There are certain calculations I should like to make with you,
To be sure that your deductions will be logical and true;
And remember, “Patience, Patience,” is the watchword of a sage,
Not to-day nor yet to-morrow can complete a perfect age.

I have sown, like Tycho Brahé, that a greater man may reap;
But if none should do my reaping, 'twill disturb me in my sleep
So be careful and be faithful, though, like me, you leave no name;
See, my boy, that nothing turn you to the mere pursuit of fame.

I must say Good-bye, my pupil, for I cannot longer speak;
Draw the curtain back for Venus, ere my vision grows too weak:
It is strange the pearly planet should look red as fiery Mars,–
God will mercifully guide me on my way amongst the stars.

Godspeed my beloved brother.
November 11, 2021
November 11, 2021
You're on my mind today, Uncle Michael. I'm wishing I could call you for your birthday, but instead I'm reading Robert Frost and thinking of you. I love and miss you so much.

Reluctance
by Robert Frost

Out through the fields and the woods
And over the walls I have wended
I have climbed the hills of view
And looked at the world, and descended
I have come by the highway home
And lo, it is ended

The leaves are all dead on the ground
Save those that the oak is keeping
To ravel them one by one
And let them go scraping and creeping
Out over the crusted snow
When others are sleeping

And the dead leaves lie huddled and still
No longer blown hither and thither
The last lone aster is gone
The flowers of the witch-hazel wither
The heart is still aching to seek
But the feet question "Whither"

Ah, when to the heart of man
Was it ever less than a treason
To go with the drift of things
To yield with a grace to reason
And bow and accept the end
Of a love or a season?
November 11, 2021
November 11, 2021
Thinking of you all day today Michael and missing you more than you know.
July 7, 2021
July 7, 2021
Not how he died, but how did he live?

                       

               Not how he died, but how did he live?

             Not what did he gain, but what did he give?

              These are units to measure the worth

              Of a man as a man, regardless of his birth

         Nor what was his church, nor what was his creed?

           But had he befriended those really in need?

           Was he every ready, with words of, good cheer,

             To bring back a smile, to banish a tear?

           Not what did the sketch in the newspaper say’

        But how many were sorry when he passed away?

                             Anonymous

                         (This was Michael)

  
July 6, 2021
July 6, 2021
I wanted to share this on 6/26, but I just couldn't get it all out, very hard. "How about them Yankee's"

 So. . . .

Since I first arrived on the scene, Michael was always there. He was 15 steps ahead of me (if you calculate each step equals a month). We use to talk about our earliest memories, most of them were the same, some weren't. We experienced the same time frame, early TV programs, cartoons, goofy fashions (especially ours), school, games, children songs, Bosco. So much more. I just feel like we would have had more. We remembered a lot of the same things.

Most importantly, I remember who he was. Fair, kind, smart, generous to a fault, supportive, funny & brutally honest!  He was my "Go To" when I needed a honest, fact based, unbiased answer, not just someone I wanted to agree with me. Boy, did I get them!

We also had a lot of things in common, like not backing down from a challenge. Michael used Logic & His Intelligence. I preferred a Big Stick with a nail in it!  He told me I should be more tactful, I said "I was, and that I told them, if they didn't want more of the same, don't tick me off". After his "tsk, tsk, he gave up. He was the Brains, I was the Brawn. ("Let's go beat up Keith").

Michael was always there for me, in many different ways, never expecting any thing in return. When he moved down to VA, he was at our house every week, for a few days at a time. Oliver & Abby Rhode (Michael named her), loved him. We played cribbage, experienced & enjoyed many journeys: conversations, we meditated the meaning of "balls of string" & "the clapping of one hand", not to mention "Gundelfork Universe", but mostly "Planet Can'tfeelmyface").

He was looking forward to all of us moving to N.C. He wanted dogs more then anything.. We talked about my Michael & I getting a few acres (a small compound). We'd have a house, Michael would have a house, on the property, all fenced in so all the dogs could run from one house to the other. I just wish that part of his dream happened.

He was my Lighthouse in the fog.

I can't say "goodbye", I don't want closure. I want to remember & I want answers, (The mystery of life). I pray & wish he would come to me some how, and let me know he's ok.

Michael, I'll meet you at "The End of the Line", on the Bright Side of the Road".  I really miss you & Love you.  Know that you're always with me. 

"How about them Yankee's"
Francie

June 22, 2021
June 22, 2021
We are all so heartbroken with your passing. There are so many fond memories of time spent with you. The nights you came bowling with Jimmy and me and Steven and Kathy and walking into the kitchen in Jersey and Harry the crow welcoming you with his loud "hello" from his cage. Your surprise birthday party at Steven and Kathy's house with so many of the cousins there. Not sure if you were happy about the birthday get together or sad that you didn't get to go to see the Jousters at Mid Evil times. You always had a smile and a kind word for everyone you met. I don't think I ever saw you in a bad mood. You loved your parents and your siblings and enjoyed each others company all the time. We will hold you forever in our hearts. Rest in peace, Michael, and enjoy a beer with Jimmy and the rest of cousins. Love and prayer to you. Joan
June 20, 2021
June 20, 2021
May the road rise to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face.
And rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until me meet again,
May God hold you in the hollow of His hand.

Sending love and peace to all that were blessed to know and love you Michael.

Much love,
Mandy, Bob & Megan
June 15, 2021
June 15, 2021
Dearest Uncle Michael,

You have the Midas touch -- anyone's heart you touch turns to gold. From when I first met you in high school you've embraced me as one of your own nieces, truly exemplifying the adage that "anyone who's a friend of the family is automatically my family too." I felt that and Samantha did too. Though she only met you a few times, you left a beautiful impression on her heart that she carries with her.

Over the years I have so many fond memories, including Lindsay's graduation and wedding, showing me how to perfect my gutter ball, visits with you and Grandma Dot in Fredericksburg, to our last time together a few summers ago. Your generous spirit lights up anyroom, putting Thomas Edison to shame!

I love you and miss you, and though I wish you were here with us, I feel safe knowing you're watching over us. And, I'm heartened to know you're with Grandma Dot, no doubt elbowing each other with trash talk. I love you...today, tomorrow and always.

Love,
Becca
June 15, 2021
June 15, 2021
Dear Uncle Michael,

I love you to the next galaxy and back. I'm so glad my cousins and I got to play in the pool with you. I had so much fun splashing you and splashing with you. I wish I had more time with you but I feel you and Grandma Dot all around me all the time, especially when I see blue butterflies. I think of you and love you always, and I know we will be together one day and we can splash and play together forever.

Love, Samantha
June 7, 2021
June 7, 2021
Dear Uncle Michael Jellybean,

I really miss you. You are the best. I have your butterfly and your calculator, and they make me think of you. I know you’ll always be around us and even though I miss you, I’m glad you’re with your mommy. I love you so much.

Love, Madeleine
June 7, 2021
June 7, 2021
Dear Uncle Michael Jellybean,

I love you so much. I miss you and will always remember playing in the pool with you. You are a great uncle. Mommy gave me the pendant that used to be yours and I really love it. I’ll think of you every time I wear it, which will be all the time except for when I go to sleep and when I take a shower. I will never forget you.

Love, Caroline
June 7, 2021
June 7, 2021
Dear Uncle Michael Jellybean,

I’m sad that you’re gone. But I know you’re always here with us. I’m so glad to have your necklace—it reminds me of you, and will always help me remember to stay strong and brave. Thank you for always sending me birthday cards and reading to me. You are a great uncle and I know that I will miss you. But I know we’ll all be together again one day.

Love, Natalie
June 6, 2021
June 6, 2021
Uncle Michael,

While we only had our paths cross a handful of times, I truly wish there more time for us to spend together. However, in those moments we did share, I will always remember seeing the joy in Natalie, Caroline, and Madeleine’s eyes to see their Uncle Michael Jellybean, and you were just as happy to spend time with them. That tells me all I need to know about the quality of your character and the good in your heart. The stories Whitney tells me of your generosity, your intellect, your thoughtfulness, and your kindness will live on. I hope you have a chess board set up for us when I see you next so we can finally have a match. You’re deeply missed by all of us and we’ll think of you always and often.

With love,

Jay
June 6, 2021
June 6, 2021
Uncle Michael,
My favorite and only Godfather and the uncle special enough to be named after our favorite childhood candy—

I really hope you know how much you’re missed down here. You’re thought of, remembered, every single day. And everyday I think more and more that I wish I’d had more time with you. Time to finally finish that family game of Dungeons and Dragons, go to a Renaissance Fair together, talk life, philosophy and science with you. I want to thank you for being such a fantastic uncle, brother and overall human being with the most generous heart. Your character, compassion and smarts are unmatchable. And a constant source of inspiration for me. I love you so so much, Uncle Michael Jelly Bean. I miss you everyday.

Love,
Your Goddaughter
Whit
June 4, 2021
June 4, 2021
So sorry, Vaccacio Family. You're loved one is at peace ❤️
May 25, 2021
May 25, 2021
Michael,

First, let me say that there are so many things I will miss about you. Your generosity of spirit and actions, your dedication to and love of family, your commitment to living by the golden rule—character traits that I’ve always admired. But perhaps most of all I’ll miss your funny stories about growing up with your brother and sisters in Towaco, NJ and our many conversations about our shared loves--music, sports and politics.

Leaving us so suddenly and unexpectedly has left a giant hole in our hearts. I know that it will take some time to heal and get over our loss, but I also know that (at least for me), grief is already lessening because I truly believe that death—just like birth--is a new beginning. An opportunity to reunite with those loved ones who have also been taken from us.

Michael, it provides great comfort to me to believe (no, more than that, to know) that you are now with your loved ones in spirit who were there to welcome you “home”—your Mom and Dad, your beloved Jerita, Uncle Frankie, Uncle John, Uncle Tommy, Jimmy Evans, Aunt Flo, Aunt Ellen, Aunt Margie and so many more.

My greatest hope is that this poem (The Little Ship) reflects your personal journey as you transitioned from this life to the next:

   “I stood watching as the little ship sailed out to sea.

   The setting sun tinted his white sails with a golden light, and as he
   disappeared from sight, a voice at my side whispered, "He is gone."

   But the sea was a narrow one. On the farther shore a little band of friends
   had gathered to watch and wait in happy expectation.

   Suddenly they caught sight of the tiny sail, and, at the very moment when
   my companion had whispered, "He is gone", a glad shout went up in
   joyous welcome.

  "Here he comes!"


Michael, my brother, even though you are no longer with us please know this: you were and are loved. I miss you, your friends and family miss you and none of us will ever, ever forget you.

So, rest in eternal peace with all your loved ones in spirit. But, before I go I would like to ask you for a special favor: When it’s time for my ship to sail, I’d like you to be there on that farther shore with your unmistakable voice shouting with welcoming excitement, “Here he comes!”
May 25, 2021
May 25, 2021
Uncle Michael -

I still remember meeting you as the new boyfriend of your darling niece. Leading up to the family function, I was nervous about making a good impression on everyone new I’d be meeting. But despite your towering stature, implacable mustache, and vice-like handshake—your huge, genuine smile put me at ease. I knew in that moment that if your niece was willing to vouch for me, then that was good enough for you. You treated me like family from the start.

I enjoyed joking around with you and talking about gaming and science fiction. And so with that in mind, I’ll quote an author we both loved, Isaac Asimov: "Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.”

This transition certainly has been troublesome to those of us who miss you terribly. But you, and your life, truly were unforgettable, and I'm so grateful to have known you. I love ya, Uncle Michael Jellybean.
May 25, 2021
May 25, 2021
Uncle Michael—I miss you so much already, and can’t help but feel that your time here with us was cut far too short. I’m so thankful for all the many memories we made: The good-natured trash talk you liked to throw down during family volleyball games, your astounding patience while attempting to teach me how to aim a bowling ball correctly (e.g. without hitting a member of my own team on the backswing), the birthday cards that arrived from you like clockwork every single year without fail (and always a day early). These are moments I’ll never forget, and for which I will always be grateful. I’ll think often of the cumulative HOURS you spent throwing your nieces and nephews around in the pool over the summers (for which you most definitely should have received combat pay). And the the joy and gratitude I felt watching you do the same, years later, with my own children.

I unknowingly saddled you with what turned out to be a beloved family nickname (Uncle Michael Jellybean) when I was only a few years old—and you never held it against me. So to say our relationship was a special one from the start would be an understatement. You were always such a wonderful uncle (as you often referred to yourself, teasingly, my “favorite” uncle) and I love and miss you so much already. Thank you for your patience, your generosity, and your love all these years—the world truly was a better place with you in it. But, instead of saying “goodbye,” I’ll say “I’ll be seeing you.” Partly because I know I will. And partly because that’s the kind of hairpin I am. You know what I mean, Jellybean?

What am I saying? Of course you do.
May 24, 2021
May 24, 2021
Michael,

I am so brokenhearted, there are no words to describe how much I miss you already. Aside from being the best “oldest brother” any sibling could ask for, to me, you were always the kindest, most generous and authentic soul in whatever room you happen to be occupying. Someone who not only really did spend your life living up to the golden rule, but did so while giving everyone else you encountered the benefit of the doubt that they were doing the same.

Unfortunately, for you, you were my “counselor of choice” growing up and looking back, for that I thank you immensely and apologize profusely. Fortunately for me, however, your beyond-your-years insights and the freakishly patient tutelage you never failed to supply when I came to you for clarification on everything from the “birds and the bees”, the truth about “soul mates”, the moons of Jupiter or best of all, how not to drive the wrong way down a one-way street, meant more to me at the time than you could ever know. So much so, they became indelibly etched in my psyche as the template for who I wanted to be when I grew up as well as a constant reminder of how blessed I was to have you playing the role of my big brother in our story together in this lifetime. My only hope, and if I’m lucky enough, is that you’re willing to take the job on again in the next one. Until then, Michael, please know, you will always be a part of me and I will always be here where you left me, looking up at the stars, loving you forever and missing you like crazy.
April 12, 2021
April 12, 2021
Michael,

I miss you & love you so much! Trying to understand all this. You will always be with me. You're touching the face of God! God Bless You always!

 
Bright Side Of The Road
By: Van Morrison

From the dark end of the street
To the bright side of the road
We'll be lovers once again
On the bright side of the road

Little darlin', come with me
Won't you help me share my load
From the dark end of the street
To the bright side of the road

Into this life we're born
Baby sometimes, sometimes we don't know why
And time seems to go by so fast
In the twinkling of an eye
Let's enjoy it while we can (let's enjoy it while we can)
Won't you help me share my load (help me share my load)
From the dark end of the street
To the bright side of the road

Into this life we're born
Baby sometimes, sometimes we don't know why
And time seems to go by so fast
In the twinkling of an eye
Let's enjoy it while we can (let's enjoy it while we can)
Help me sing my song (help me sing my song)
Little darling come alone
To the bright side of the road

On the dark end of the street (on the dark end of the street)
To the bright side of the road (to the bright side of the road)
Little darling come alone
On the bright side of the road

On the dark end of the street (on the dark end of the street)
To the bright side of the road (to the bright sight of the road)
We'll be lovers once again
On the bright side of the road


After many discussions regarding this song, I know you loved it, hope you get to hear it up there. 

Francie

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