“The moment you left me, my heart was split in two, one side was filled with memories, the other side died with you. 
I often lay awake at night when the world is fast asleep and take a walk down memory lane with tears upon my cheek. 
Remembering you is easy. I do it every day, but missing you is a heartache that never goes away. 
I hold you tightly within my heart and there you will remain, you see life has gone on without you, but will never be the same.”

An Irish Saying About Grief and Loss

It's been a year since Michael left us and I think of him almost every day as I think of Sally every day as well. It's been a tough year for all of us who knew and loved Michael and not just because of his loss, but also because COVID-19 only added to our pain and anguish with the restrictions and fears this pandemic has caused. I wrote to Sally in a card I sent her for Michael's anniversary and she told me how well I described Michael and how much my words and feelings and support have meant to her. She then emailed me after typing up what I wrote so that I might post it here on Michael's Memorial website. I loved Michael even though I met him years after he and Sally met and came together, and the visits I had with both of them at their house were too short, but very, very sweet, fun, and cheerful. So, in the spirit of sharing, here is what I wrote to Sally: 
"Since the coming days this month will bring with them turbulent emotional swings, I wanted to assure you that I am here to support you in whatever way you need.
I am thinking of you all the time and also remembering with love and fondness Michael, his quirky sense of humor, his generosity of spirit, his kindness, and his caring personality and while I am sure he had his faults as we all do, I know how much you miss him.
Please take advantage of my shoulder and ears any time, day or night. My phone is always on.
I miss him too, every time I think of you, he is there behind you.
I wish I had known him better and for longer, but what I do know is how easy he was to like, get along with, and have fun with.
Hugs and love go flying to you every day. I am always with you.
Your loving sister, Stacie.
June 2021"

And so I say now: I love you, Michael! I see you there behind Sally every time I think of you and every time I talk with or spend time with Sally. Thank you for the laughter, the tears, the good and bad times and everything you shared with Sally, and with all of us. We have been truly blessed to have know such a real human being as you!

John and I recently visited Sally at her home in Averill Park after many years and were overwhelmed by the creative, artistic and architectural beauty of what we call her Great Camp, created by Michael. We never knew all of his incredible talents and skills and imaginative abilities in designing this light, airy and beautiful building, not to mention his amazing collection of plants in and out and decoration of walls from ceiling to floor. Michael was clearly a Renaissance man, and we wish we could have congratulated him.

My husband John and I have many years of wonderful memories of dinners with Michael and Sally, often at a Vietnamese restaurant in downtown Albany, enjoying fascinating discussions of topics from personal experiences camping, hiking and paddling to books, politics, travel, and Michael's memories of Vietnam. I will never forget those evenings, nor will I ever forget Michael's wisdom, wit, warmth, energy, uniqueness in so many ways, and his many achievements. I have appreciated this opportunity to get to know him further by viewing photos and other tributes of his leadership abilities from a young age and his warmth and love for his sons and family.. It was such a shock to learn of his unexpected death just following his birthday, and my heart goes out to Sally and all his family. We will miss him greatly, as will all who knew him. We look forward to a future celebration of his life.
Phyllis Bader-Borel 

My wife, Phyllis and I, were very sad to lose our friend Mike, whose company we have enjoyed with Sally on many occasions, often in a vibrant evening discussion at a Vietnamese restaurant in the Capital District. There were other memories, but the one that sticks in my mind is the time we spent a night at the Kunjamuck log cabin in the woods north of Speculator next to the Siamese Ponds Wilderness. We heard some noise during the night and thought nothing of it. But a rare October snowstorm had come down during the night. We were able to drive out the 10 miles on a logging road and thought, wait until folks hear about this down in Albany. Well, the real storm hit south and Albany was impassable. And Mike and Sally and we just marveled at all of it. He was a wonderful, memorable person. We miss him.

How very sad I was to learn from Sally of Mike's unexpected passing.

We met in the late 1970s and, in 1979, I had the opportunity to work for Mike at Kirkman 3hree in Delmar for four years. I had wanted to work in advertising and marketing and it was the perfect opportunity to learn about the business, as working at K3 ultimately laid the groundwork for the rest of my career in private, nonprofit and public sector marketing communications.

I always appreciated that I could always call Mike whenever I had a question about some print production issue I was dealing with, or could bring him and his staff a project to help me produce when I eventually became a K3 client. He always made working with him so easy and seamless. What a great introduction those four years at Kirkman 3hree were in the early stages of my career. Most of the credit for that goes to Mike, who was as much a mentor and good friend to me as he was my boss.

It's a testament to him as a kind and supportive friend that we always remained in touch for the ensuing 37 years thereafter, meeting periodically for lunch and catching up on developments in our respective lives, or introducing him and Sally to the latest performing artist who had caught my fancy.

I had fully expected to see Mike for lunch again at some point this year, but, sadly, it wasn't meant to be. I will dearly miss seeing him and enjoying our periodic lunches and our wide-ranging conversations. He truly was one of the "good guys" who held a special place in my professional and personal life - a rare fellow and truly a treasured friend.

I will look forward to seeing Sally, Jason, Spencer and their families, along with mutual friends and colleagues when we are able to gather when circumstances allow to celebrate the very well-lived life of our very dear friend. 

Please accept my deepest sympathies of Mike’s passing.  He indeed had a significant impact on his many friends. Mike and I had many competitive one on one basketball games and tennis matches in high school. He was Mike with his tenacious somewhat unorthodox way of shooting baskets and serving in tennis. He must have carried this tenacious approach to life in all of his endeavors. Mike contacted me this year of which I will cherish my reconnecting with him even if only by phone. 
Lowell Harvey

Thank you, Jason, Cyrus, and Sera for giving Mike’s friends the opportunity to express their thoughts about and their love for Mike.
I pledged Phi Delta Theta in the fall of 1963 when I was 17 years old. I was embarrassingly shy. Mike was the first person in my pledge class who I met. He was not just friendly; he was extremely open. We became friends immediately. I had trouble meeting people at that time—hey, I still have trouble meeting people—and I am not sure how my first months at the Phi Delt house would have gone had it not been for Mike’s friendship. Today, many of my closest friends are old Phis, so I know that Mike’s friendship at the time was very important to how my life has turned out. Mike and I roomed together in the Phi Delt house our sophomore year and we shared an apartment the second semester of our junior year. 
Through the last 50 years, our communication has been off and on, but each time we have gotten together, either in person, on the phone, or via email, it has been like we talked the day before. 
Twice, I visited and stayed with Mike and Sally in Albany. Once was in 1985, when I visited with my wife, Holly. In 2018, I visited Mike and Sally alone. It was a great four days that I will cherish forever. There were times during the visit when I felt sorry for Sally—a really wonderful lady—because Mike’s and my conversations always somehow reverted to our Vietnam experiences.
Twice Mike came back to Lincoln. The first time--sometime around 2008--my pledge class had a reunion. Mike came back from New York and stayed at my house in Omaha. We drove to Lincoln two days for reunion events. Our talks to and from Lincoln each day were always special to me. One of the other people who left a message on this site said that Mike always “thought hard on things.” Wow! A perfect description of Mike’s thinking and it is a perfect description of our talks to and from Lincoln. In 2017, our pledge class had another reunion and Mike came with Spencer. I am grateful I got to meet one of Mike’s son. Both of his sons, I know, were not just important to him; they were everything to him.
These last four or five years, Mike and I have been in pretty consistent contact on the phone or by email. I loved his positivity. I loved his enthusiasm for life. I loved the fact that although he loved sports and especially Nebraska football, he always wanted to open himself up and talk about deeper things that meant something to him—he wanted to think “hard on things”. Most of all, I loved Mike. I will always miss him.

My cousin Mike is older than me but not by more than a set of cloth diapers. I was raised in California, quite a distance in those days from Nebraska. Every year we got a Christmas Letter from my uncle Bud. He was a newspaperman and he was proud of his family, the letter was always filled with the yearly achievements of his children. When Bud’s little sister, my mother Jean, got through reading the letter she would look down at my sister and me and say, “What’s WRONG with you two?”. So it was that my first impression was that my cousin Mike wasn’t starting out making my life any easier.

My first real impression of Mike came when I visited them in North Platte. I had just gotten my license then and Mike let me drive his stick shift alone all around town. Wherever I went people recognized and waved at the car. I felt grand. Mike had firecrackers that summer and he taught me how to launch cans by half filling one with water and nesting another upside down on top to get amazing hydraulic lift. A scientific breakthrough. But, most of all, Mike and I were curious about each other and we were not judgmental. We liked each other straight away.

When I was 26 I moved to Hartford, CT and Mike was out of the service and homesteading in Albany, NY. We got stoned and started anew. We hiked, barbecued, debated, shared pain and joy and raised families. Mike always thought hard on things and had some deeply held beliefs but he was a truth seeker more than a zealot and was willing to agree to disagree until next time. We always parted closer than when we met. And he always had a twinkle in his eye.

I have heard it said that “without death life would be unbearable”. From where l sit at this moment this death came to early. There are arguments unmade, empathy unshared and wisecracks unuttered. And life is a long way from being more bearable. I was angry to lose my friend but now I am sad.

I first met Mike in Army Basic training at Fort Lewis Washington in 1969. From there we both went to Fort Sam Houston in San Antonio Texas for Medical Corpsman training and then on to Vietnam ending up in the same company as combat medics. We went on our first R & R together to Sydney Australia. We both extended our time in Vietnam to get an early Army discharge. So we shared many of the same experiences during our military service. I did stop to see him in Lincoln,Nebraska shortly after our military discharge.
   But regrettably we lost touch with each other until this year, I think it was February when I received a text message from him with his phone number. We visited sharing some stories. He gave me some suggestions on books to read that were more specific to our time and location when we were stationed in Vietnam. In March he sent another text asking for my mailing address because he had found another book very specific to the Laos incursion we were involved with at the end of our time in Vietnam.
   I told him when I received the book and would read It on a trip to Hawaii I was taking. He responded by making some suggestions on what to visit while there. That was in March of this year.
   I share this because I find it ironic we shared so many similar experiences, some very difficult and challenging times together and then lose touch for 50 years. Only then to get reacquainted for a brief time and then suddenly, permanently lose the relationship.

Regards,Gary A. Lee

Mike and I first met when Chris and I moved to Albany from NYC in the mid 70's. We were introduced by Kathy Kaplan, who sold us our house. Mike knowledge of advertising helped us market our art business in 1976 and continued to help us grow it, well into the 1980's. That relationship grew into a strong friendship as Mike and I both liked college hockey. For over 20 years we shared RPI hockey tickets and the occasional pregame DeFazio pizza. We would also meet almost every month for lunch at My Place in Delmar or The Ships Pub in Loudonville where Mike brought his interest in politics, sports, home repairing, movies and the many interesting things going on in his life to our relationship. With our spouses we enjoyed good restaurant dining throughout the area, museum visits, stage shows, and just plain spending time together. Mike, I will miss you. You helped fill my life. RIP my good friend.

I remember Michael as an incredibly kind and gentle soul, with a sharp intellect and wit. I have such great memories of being with him and Sally at their home. They were both so supportive of me after I retired from a dance career and was fumbling my way through figuring out how to get "a real job"! I appreciated his guidance so much (and Sally's!). I believe the last time I saw Michael was a trip we took to Jacob's Pillow to see Mark Morris. We had lost touch after I moved to Michigan, but I've often thought of him because I fell into work at a marketing communications agency. He was a great man, and I was so sad to learn of his passing. I send lots of love to Sally and the kids. - Jesse

Mike, my Dad, and I would meet up at the US Open (on what always seemed to be the hottest day of the year) and we would hang out all day watching the tennis matches. I think I liked to go because my Dad and Mike loved to watch the matches. One year, I remember we asked Mike if he wanted us to get him anything for lunch and he said that he had brought his own. He brought out a package of deviled eggs which I thought was a funny choice for a hot day. I'm going to treasure that memory. Mike always had an easy going way about him which I can appreciate even more as I get older. Suzanna Banana

Mike was a friend of all of us! I can't think of another member of our class of which this can be said. We are all sorry that we didn't stay closer in contact. You have put together a beautiful photo memorial to him! When I think of such a good friend passing, I think of what Helen Keller said, "What we have once enjoyed and deeply loved we can never lose, for all that we love deeply becomes part of us." 

My father was always there for me. Though he wan't always able to express his love for me and his family in words, he very clearly expressed himself through his actions. Always responsible, true to his word, and the protector and provider for his family, he has served as an excellent model for how to live my life. I am blessed that he took the time to teach me how to ski and fish and play cards and how not to cook and how not to argue. You were a great father and friend and I miss you.