Nancy has been and always will be my forever friend. Growing up neighbors, there was just 2 houses between her place and mine and a total of 10 girls in those 4 houses. With just 6 months between us, there was never a time we were not together...where you saw one...you saw the other. We wore a path in everyone's back yard, often walking past Grandpa Oyler's sunflower garden to play together. During those wonderful times of fun and imagination, we became the "Dare Sisters Trapeze Artists" as we hung upside down on her swing set, we listened to The Monkees and The Beatles as we read comic books from her large collection and spent endless hours playing board games and learning how to play cribbage.

I was born with cerebral palsy, so when Nancy was diagnosed with diabetes, we bonded even more closely over our physical /medical challenges. We made a pact that we would always take care of and be there for each other. When she got married, she asked me to fly to California to stand up with her at the wedding. It was one of the best trips ever! Though miles apart, our friendship never wavered.

As we grew older and the challenges got tougher...losing parents...broken relationships...lost jobs...poorer health...she promised to be my legs and I vowed to be her eyes...we could still laugh at ourselves even through our tears.
As the pandemic separated us, those phone calls became more precious. Our last communication was on her birthday.If she could not go out, she loved meals brought in, diet 7-up, crunchy Cheetos and peanut M&M's!!

Our friendship was like the heart necklace you bought with 2 halves, where each friend wears half the heart. For the heart to be complete, you needed both parts together.
Nancy, I am glad you are free of pain and suffering. I pray you will hold onto your heart until we meet again and our hearts are complete once more.

I love you,my forever friend...rest in peace.
Ginny

These memories will be written, not in any specific order, but as God reveals them to me. There is no possible way that I can EVER express how much I loved my best friend Nancy.

God brought us together as four years old in Kindergarten at Possum Elementary School. Nancy wore a green and blue plaid jumper, little brown shoes with white anklet socks. She was in the play kitchen and we began a friendship that has lasted 61 years. As a matter of fact, I was extremely withdrawn and shy and would cry to the point that the teacher would have to call my mother to pick me up early. The separation anxiety was real. My mother came in one morning to, again, pick me up and take me home but the teacher suggested that she encourage me to find a little friend. So mother stayed and as I calmed down, she asked me if there might be someone that I would like to have as a friend. She saw Nancy playing in the kitchen and coaxed me to go over with her and say hello to her. So, I did. And like it or not, Nancy was stuck with me!! I suffered with shyness most of the time I went to school, but knowing Nancy was going to be there made all the difference in my world. Nancy could make me laugh and she was truly a loving person who helped me throughout my life. She always checked on me and I checked on her.

I was either at her home or she mine. She was well loved by my parents and siblings. I remember in Mrs. McClure’s class that Nancy began having problems with fatigue in the afternoon. Then one day she was absent and then another. I was worried about her and my mother called Francis and learned that Nancy had Diabetes. I began feeling almost like I wanted to be in charge of watching over her at school and making sure she was feeling ok. I worried about her and stuck close to her. We signed up for the same classes as much as we could in high school, shared lockers, shared study hall, etc. I would spend many nights at Nancy’s with Francis close by watching over her. (Back then, there were no glucose monitors.)

We had a blast dancing to records and talking about anything and everything! Playing cards and watching Johnny Carson, laughing our butts off at the stupidest and silliest things! Laughing at each other! Nancy had the best laugh ever! Nancy had her own pace and I will never forget that she was constantly yelling at me to slow down in the halls at Possum and Shawnee! I have been known to play a few pranks on Nancy and she always forgave me, but she would bring them up to me in these later years and expected me to apologize again…and I would!!

When I was allowed to begin using the phone, we would talk every night. And that routine never stopped. We have always, always had a bond that we had to talk either every day forever or at least two or three times a week. That may seem silly, but she is the sister I never had. We could always call each other day or night.

As she waited for a transplant many, many years ago, we prayed every day that it would be soon. When the call did come in from Minnesota, she called me and told me that she would keep in touch from the road, from the hotel and from the hospital. Nancy knew how I could be and seemed to always anticipate how I would react to learning about another hurdle she had to jump in her physical challenges.

Nancy would constantly tell me too, “Now, Harriet, don’t worry about me, I am going to be just fine! I will get through this! God is with me and will take care of me.”

About eight days before she passed away, Nancy called me and said, I know this is crazy, but I have a favor to ask. And I will be just fine if you can’t do it! They served those horrible cabbage rolls again tonight and I HATE cabbage rolls and I am really hungry! Would you mind getting me some dinner at Wendy’s? It ended up to be McDonalds since the restaurant is closer to Dayspring and I wanted her meal to be hot. So she asked for a double cheeseburger with everything, fries and a drink. When we pulled into the parking space it was about 7:50 in the evening. I called Nancy and told her that we had arrived and to meet me in the lobby since we couldn’t come in. As I stood in the lobby chatting with the cleaning staff, I heard her talking to the aide that was pushing her in a wheelchair . She said something to the aide about me and the history of our friendship that I will never forget that brought such joy to my heart and got me crying right away. As she came up to me, I looked at her and immediately wanted to hug her! With Covid restrictions I could not. I told her that I loved her with all my heart and asked her to raise her head and look upwards so I could see her pretty eyes and smile. As she raised her head I busted out sobbing and told her how much I had missed her sweet face! I asked her to call me after she finished her meal and we would with speak again before she went to sleep. I also told her that I would bring her high power special reading glasses that I ordered for her in a few days. It was so hard to leave after just arriving. My sweet friend had been through so much. After we got home the phone rang and I couldn’t get to it in time. It was Nancy. She left a message. She was thanking us for making the effort to get her dinner and that it was delicious and the best dinner she had ever eaten!! I am serious! She said that! I tried to call her back, but it went to voicemail.

I didn’t hear from my dear friend after that. I had left voicemails. I felt the way I had felt in grade school when she was out. I wondered if something was wrong. Then on my way home from work, I received the news that Nancy was not well and I went in the house and prayed.

I miss her sooo much and know that she is healed and not in pain any longer. I called my mother and she was also sad. But she gave me a visual to think about Nancy in this way… that God said, “ I will no longer allow you to suffer and bring you home with me”and he swooped her up and carried her home in his arms. That visual will remain with me and comforts me.

The next day when I got to work, I saw Nancy’s name printed on a label of her optical tray containing the just arrived new glasses. I held the tray and picked up the glasses and remembered what Ellen’s words to me were as she told me about Nancy’s passing, “ SHE CAN SEE” I put the glasses back in the tray and thanked God for restoring her sight. The glasses were given as a gift to another low vision patient who felt so blessed to have them.

Nancy, I am missing you terribly and am so blessed to have had you for a friend. I promise to continue fighting the good fight and stay faithful as you have always been. I promise you that this friendship will continue to live on and that one day we will be chatting it up in Heaven praising God together! Until then . . .

I love you Matthew and am praying for you, Olivia, Ellen and All of the family near and far. May God comfort your hearts.

Love,
Harriet

Words cannot express what a loss you are to the family but heaven’s gain. You have had so much pain in your life but you are now pain free & in God’s loving arms & with your sister Elaine. Though I haven’t seen you in a long time due to Covid restrictions you’ve been in my thoughts & prayers. I pray your son & granddaughter will find peace & comfort remembering those wonderful memories.