Happy New Year, Nichole,

Another year without you , and it breaks my heart.  I am gonna really try hard to live my life without you, but it ain't easy.  I still think about you all day every day.  People say that the pain gets better with time but maybe my body is not allowing that to happen.  I try to think about the good times we had and that helps sometimes.  People can't tell me how to grieve because I was with you at the end.  I watched you take your last breath and I still have nightmares about that   Whatever you tried to tell me at the end, I guess it was not meant for me to know at this time.  Save it, so when we meet again you can tell me, until then, continue to rest well, love you and miss you

Merry Christmas Nichole, dad and I are in Orlando sitting around in our stank pajamas.  This is the 3rd Christmas without you, and I must say, it hurts like its the first.  I still can't muster up some Christmas spirit, perhaps next year, or maybe never.  I always considered my self to be a strong human being , but not so true.  Your brother took up your slack for games systems for Christmas, but I'm sure they are not much fun without you.  Neisha seems to be coping, but I can tell in her voice sometimes when she is missing you.  Wayne is hooked up with seems to be a nice young lady, and he seems happy.  Have not spoken to Natalie in months, but I'm sure when she is ready , she will call me.  Jourdan is going to high school next year, and is keeping up with good grades, you would be proud of her.  That's all for now, baby girl, love you to the moon and back.  Continue to rest in paradise. Mom

Wow....... Its been 2 years since we had our last conversation and all i can think of is how we met during the Ravens AFC Championship game and playing Call Of Duty and yes, you kicked my butt alot that night. I could never forget the times we had and i really enjoyed myself with you. I always think of you every night and i cry myself to sleep thinking about you and its sucks that your not here. Yes, things were rocky at 1st, but we managed to rise above it and move on from it. I have a decal with your intials on it and i will never stop wearing it on my helmet. I hope one day we can be together again. I miss you and it hurts for me to write this and rest in paradise.



                                                                                                                    Love,
                                                                                                               Ernest F.