Love, Goals, Loss, Grief, Grit and Goal.

A very big congratulations to your dearest husband Sabastine Wakdok, PhD, MD, MPP, MBA for this Award of Degree of Doctor of Philosophy in Global Health Policy by the The University of Edinburgh.

Despite our loss of you his dear wife, in your first year of PhD in 2021(yours at The London School of Economics and Political Science (LSE), in spite of the overwhelming grief; his staying power at continuing what both of you had started which he had to accomplish alone, shows so much grit.

The love, the loss, the grief and now achieving the goal of a PhD, which you so much wanted, by himself.

MBBS, University of Jos
FWACP,
FMCFM,
MPP, University College London
MBA, University of Oxford
PhD, The University of Edinburgh

Dedicated to your everlasting and loving memory of Dr. Olije Ega Wakdok

We shall remember you for all ages!

Hello big sis,

I am here to tell you that I miss you. A number of things have happened that I know you would be proud of and also a number of things that your guidance and advice would have made a lot of difference to.

I trust GOD and I know you are well; looking right at me as I write this.

I love you.

Dearest Olije,

You live on in my heart! You never left!

I will never understand but it’s okay….

Hello Love

For you lived and lived in our hearts, you will live for always.

Everyday passes but no day passes without you in our hearts.

Everyday passes but no day makes it any easier or lighter.

Death may be strong but love is stronger. Death stole you from us but love keeps you in us forever.

You shall always be remembered. Your memory will be remembered for all our lives.

Hi Hun,

The second year running and a Valentine without you Hun. I still continue to judge him faithful. Time has frozen for me since you left and what is broken can't be whole anymore.

To keep me going, I count time from the end; it is now 1 year 10 months closer to when my own race will end so I can see your face, your smile, and to be with you where you are. I will find my way back to you.

I dedicate our favourite song every Valentine's eve to your beautiful soul- "Tears of Angel"

https://youtu.be/gg4zxY1vF1w

Sabastine

https://youtu.be/gg4zxY1vF1w

Deearest Olije, this was you people's song for years on each Valentine's eve, after you both found the song 13 years ago.

Little did Sabastine know that it was going to happen in reality.

We will love you always.

Remember us always, Sweetheart.

Sweetheart, yesterday six whole months just passed like days. Half a year gone. Without your physical dwelling with us.
Speedy as these 6 months are, it's been a long difficult journey.

Time does different things to different people.
To some it heals, to some it hurts.
To some it stands still, to some it speeds past

To us, time doesn't take you farther away from us but it hasn't brought you back to us.

We continue to pray for your beautiful soul.

We will always love and miss you.

Mama♥️♥️♥️♥️
I miss you sooooo much. 6 months already . These 6 months haven’t been easy without hearing your voice, seeing a text from you, video chatting you or even an assignment to carry out. I miss you soooooo much Mama. I’m certain you’re resting peacefully. Surely, we’ll meet in the Lord’s bosom. 

How time flies by,it's already six 6 months you have gone to be with the lord,in all we judge him faithful thank you for the beautiful memories Momma❤ I love,cherished and missed you so much,keep resting endless Jewel

You will always and forever be loved and remembered. Your unique nature, strong smiles and godly ways are always with us sleep on dear

I love how you keep coming to mind. It shows you are here with me. I have found it difficult to say something here but it’s months now and this seems to be the reality.

I know you are guiding and interceding for me from above.

Thank you for being ever amazing and a big sister. I love you 

Because it is said that still waters run deep,
We opened the tap of our hearts for our rivers of tears to flow endlessly. Yet, the flowing waters that is our tears ran deep.

5 months ago you woke up healthy and started your day on a beautiful note.
Then bang!
Everything changed. Our lives changed.

Not a single day in these 5 months have we forgotten you. Not a moment has it felt easier or lighter.

You are in our hearts and minds every blessed moment.

Sweetheart, we will always love you. We miss you.

The deepness of our grief .
Not only still waters run deep.

Our angel, our candle on God's alter. You flame will never go out.

Remember us!

Dear Ojile,
Met you briefly during my posting as a House officer in Paediatrics and later in O &G but you left a lasting impression on me.
Your kindheartedness, friendly nature and understanding as a registrar then was what we would talk about amongst ourselves as house officers.
This indeed is a very painful loss.
Continue to rest in peace and may God comfort your immediate and extended family in Jesus name

Sweetheart, it's been one whole month since your internment. One whole month since we last saw your beautiful face as you lay peacefully.

It's been a long month of weeks, days, minutes and seconds. But it's been a longer 8 weeks since you left us.

It's been tough, rough and painful. It wasn't meant to be this way. No, not like this. No one saw it coming, no one ever thought it will be this way. Just like that? Just like that!

While we mourn, we still believe in life everlasting. Keep resting dearest in the Father's house, in your room prepared by His son.

You shall be remembered for all times!

6 weeks today
6 painful weeks
6 hurtful weeks
6 hurting weeks

Dearest Oli,
It hurts so bad
Who would have ever thought or imagined?

You didn't have to leave Sweetheart. Not so soon. Not so sudden. Not without a goodbye, we don't say goodbye I know. So, so long our dear angel.

6 Saturdays ago. Our world spinned. Our world changed. You left and left us broken. And no, it's not a film trick..

6 weeks today
6 painful weeks
6 hurtful weeks
6 hurting weeks.

You are a great person. You will always be great.

Perpetual light shine upon you darling.

Forever in my heart Olije!!! Your smile! Your warmth and liveliness! My darling I only gathered the strength to tell your babies that Aunty now lives in Heaven! Let your wings spread on us especially on Sabastine and your family! Let it bring calmness and peace and cover them from the sun! I miss you!

Today was difficult Olije! There were moments when I felt I couldn't breathe because of the heaviness I felt in my heart! I could only imagine what your family was going through. I couldn't carry myself to get the coldstone icecream you loved so much, which I meant to give your children in your honour. Your absence hurts Olije! Your husband is broken! Your family is in agony! But this too shall pass!
Happy birthday my dear! Keep smiling with the angels for all eternity! You were, and still are, deeply loved.

Today was the day we agreed I’d come to you! We planned it two month prior! So today I spent it praying for those you loved and cared for! Sabastine, your family and friends!!!!Today the 18th May, I reflect on the human race as a whole!!! It’s essence! The pursuit! The emptiness and perpetual dissatisfaction outside of Christ! Indeed to live is Christ and to die is gain! You have gained! You will not be forgotten! Every year on Katlynns birthday I will remember you went on a long sleep!!! Sleep on! for all of our pursuit will end in this sleep!

Dearest Oli, I never forget your birthday just as you never forget mine. Yesterday I did not receive the lovely birthday message I usually get from you and today I could not send you one either and it hurts but I will send my message here. Happy birthday dear, I know you are resting in God's arms. I love you. 

Our dearest Olije, today's your earthly birthday darling, your first birthday away from this earth.

Very few people are special like you with special dates.
Born on the day Pope St. John Paul was born, 18th May.
You left us one month one day to your 41st birthday.
Both Pope John Paul II and you left this world in April.
You were interned on the Feast of our Lady of Fatima 13th of May which also happened to be the feast of Ascension of our Lord in 2021.

You left and left us broken.
But you shall be remembered for all times.
We will never forget you Honey.

Happy birthday in heaven our angel.
We love you and will always miss you.

May perpetual light continue to shine upon you always.

My dearest one and only sister, Dr Olije Helen Alexandria Ega Wakdok
I have been lost for words on what to say since your passing from this world. Today would have been your 41st birthday where I would have called you to wish you a 'Happy Birthday' but I can't anymore. However, I commemorated your birthday with you in a sacred way through a "Special Memorial Thanksgiving Mass in honour of your life and your passing from this world. Each time we celebrate the Holy Eucharist at Mass we are joined in union with all the angels and the saints. I believe you are now part of that heavenly union in JESUS Name. Our Heavenly Father allowed you to be taken from us to Rest in our Eternal Home. I believe you are safe in GOD's Hands and I will see you someday in GOD's Divine timing.
For now, May GOD grant you Eternal rest and let perpetual light shine upon you and may your beautiful and gentle soul rest in peace Amen.

Tribute to my darling wife, best friend, colleague, motivation, and angel!

My sweetest Oli, it is said that God is too kind to be cruel, but why did fate deal me such a cruel blow? How am I supposed to cope without you my soul mate?

My dearest Oli, it is said that God is too deep to explain himself, but how am I to know that my life would suddenly change on that afternoon of Saturday the 17th of April 2021 with your sudden exit?

My loveliest Oli, it is said that God is too wise to make a mistake, but what is this nightmare I have not woken up from? Who can tell me the meaning of all these?

There are no words in any language to describe you, who you are and what you mean to me. God sent you, one of his angels down to earth to take care of me. There are also no words in any language to explain my devastation since you left me, left us. I am desolate, I am lost, I am crushed, and my world is spinning. I really wished you stayed longer but like magic you are gone.

We shared our lives, our world, our hopes, our plans, our fears, our faith, our career, our joy, and our pains. Our lives were completely intertwined. We shared our greatest gift which is love. You took my heart and made it yours, but you left me suddenly without an opportunity for goodbye, leaving me broken and shattered. Now I am left without joy but only pains. I am only left with memories, your memories, our memories. Only memories all the same.

You were smart, brilliant, and intellectually stimulating. I was in awe of you each day I wake up. We could engage at that level from sunrise to sunset. You were a loving and thorough clinician who had empathy for your patients. You were a deep thinker, a passionate researcher and a fierce advocate for Universal Health Coverage and a promising world-class academic. All your colleagues and professorial advisory team at the London School of Economics echoed this at every opportunity. I could not stop speaking highly of you to every colleague of mine at Oxford, University College London and Edinburgh. They all virtually feel they have known you for years.

I know you are seated up there in heaven and you can see how broken I am. We had our own world, we built our own world, we lived for us and by us in our own world. Ours was not a perfect world, but it was perfect for the two imperfect people that we are. With you I was complete. In you I was complete. But in a matter of seconds, you evaporated from my life without a warning or any sign.

We are meant to grow old together, living, walking, holding hands, sleeping, eating, reading, laughing, traveling, loving, and doing all the things we always do. Now, you will forever remain young in my heart and mind. You will never grow older than the last time I saw you.

I close my eyes hoping this was some dream that I can wake up from. I stare at the door thinking you will walk in saying you took longer than you planned outdoor. But this is some tragic reality. My sad reality and as the days roll by my reality hits harder. My heart aches and the feeling of it ripping apart will not go away.

More than 8 years ago on the 20th of October 2012, during our wedding reception, I recited this poem to you.

Soul mate

I had eyes
Which could not see.

I had ears
Which could not hear

I had nostrils
Which could not smell.

I had lungs
Which could not breath

I had brains
Which could not think

I had hands
Which could not touch.

I had legs
Which could not walk.

I had a heart
Which could not beat

Then you came my way Oli

I can see
I can hear
I can smell
I can breathe
I can think
I can touch
I can walk
I can feel
But above all, now I can love.

Then suddenly you left. You left me. Today I stand alone without you my all, without you my love, without you, my wife; dejected, confused, and helpless. You left me stranded in this world. I stand bare while the arrows of pains pierce my heart, flesh, and bones because the most beautiful soul on earth, the most loving being under the firmament, my most cherished of God’s creation left me without saying goodbye. Without me saying sorry or forgive me. We were still talking, and you just left.

You were always praying, for me, for you, for us. You prayed for all our plans and hopes. You prayed on your knees, on your feet and your back. Your rosaries and bibles were at every corner of homes. You prayed at day and night, yet God did not keep you for me? You of all people know how empty I am now. I look back at the over 15 years of knowing and loving you, I look back at over the 8 years of being married to you. All gone? Gone like the wind or with the wind? When will you come back to me?

My darling Oli come back please.

Please come back to me Honey!

May you live forever in God’s glory with all the holy angels and saints till we meet to part no more. The memory of the Just shall never be forgotten.

You shall be remembered for always!

Your broken husband,
Sabastine.

Sweetheart

Today makes it exactly one month since you left us. One month ago by this time 8.46am, you were bubbling with life and full of hope for greater life ahead. You were excited and optimistic.

You are such a special person who came into our lives and touched us in ways we can never describe, then left us with pains we can never explain.

Yesterday, little Sanches said he wasn't going to your house because he misses Auntie Olije. We all miss you. This is one very difficult situation. It's a hail of pains.

Your memory will be remembered forever!

We will always love you.

Pray for us mortals.

Dr Ega- Waldok lived a very short and impactful life
Praying for God’s comfort for the family she left behind
Eternal rest grant her oh Lord and let your perpetual light forever shine on her Amen

It's taken a while for this to sink in. The news had been simply unbelievable. But yes, a rare gem has gone to be with the Lord..

Very few people are like you Olije. Intelligent, insightful, loving, kind, helpful, a comforter and such an encourager. Thanks for the great times we had Nigeria-trotting and preparing for and passing exams. Thank you for your boldness to stand for truth and justice - the world needs more like you. Thanks for being there for me when I lost my Mum. Thanks for so many things we can't write about. You sure packed a lot of love into so few years. The world has lost a precious soul - those of us who know you and the ones who now will not have that privilege.
Adieu, till we meet again.

The Lord comfort Sebastian and all your family and friends like only He can.

Its really disheartening to hear of your demise. Your death has left a big vacuum in the heart of your loved ones. I have known you virtually all through childhhood. The Zaria connect, the family friend connect and the UniJos connect. All I imagine is your warm smile and simplicity.
May God console the loved ones you departed from and grant you eternal rest in His blossom. Olije your death is a very rude shock. Sleep on Dr.Journey well with the Angels until the resurrection morning.

My heart was broken when I was informed about you leaving this earth... I wish God gave us chance to pray for your recovery...

There are very few people that can effect lifes passionately in this world, and you are one of them.... "You will say as a woman you have to multi-tax". A woman can always do more, Whoever is connected to you, you always have them at heart....

"Mama" (as I will always refer to her)....You will never be FORGOTTEN, You will ALWAYS be love in my heart....
Keep sleeping in the Lord until we meet and depart no more.

It's so sad and shocking hearing about your demise. This hit me so bad. You loved me dearly and only wanted the best for me. U did everything u could to see that I was happy and successful. Thank you for the love and care u showed me. I'll miss your long calls, words of encouragement and concern especially about my masters. U will forever be in my heart.
I promise to make u proud and ensure that the dreams we had for me comes to pass by God's grace.
I pray God forgives all your earthly transgressions, grants you a merciful Judgement and receive your soul in Heaven.
Rest in peace dear Aunty Helen till we meet to part no more.
Love,
Tipalin.

It's so sad and shocking hearing about your demise. This hit me so bad. You loved me dearly and only wanted the best for me. U did everything u could to see that I was happy and successful. Thank you for the love and care u showed me. I'll miss your long calls, words of encouragement and concern especially about my masters. U will forever be in my heart.
I promise to make u proud and ensure that the dreams we had for me comes to pass by God's grace.
I pray God forgives all your earthly transgressions, grants you a merciful Judgement and receive your soul in Heaven.
Rest in peace dear Aunty Helen till we meet to part no more.
Love,
Tipalin.

This is quite shocking , condolences to all family members and the SOFPON family. Rest in peace dear colleague, you left your positive mark on everyone you met

I didn't see myself writing this ma'am but.....you were an angel beautiful in and out, greatly admired with your magnetic smile... I can still hear how happy your voice sounds whenever you called you never failed to ask after our wellbeing after every conversation same thing the last time you called which was on thursday before your death... We can't ask God why but pls we can at least ask Him to give you the most cosy place in heaven warmer than the joy and love you radiated. You are greatly loved, cherished and will be missed by all the lives you touched.

Again, I still think this is a dream... I'm in the service of songs and pray for you Olije....
I can only say May God comfort you Sabastine, her families and all who loved her. It is truly well with our souls.... Amen

It is still a shock to know you are no more. You contacted me out of the blues recently, now i look back at that convo with so much nostalgia. I am glad i could help.
Rest on dear Olije, may God comfort your loved ones.

Hmm, Death has really pierced an infallible hole in my heart. lnfact hearing the news of your demise was a shocker that I have never encountered in my whole life.You have been more then a mother to me,a role model and an idol. How can I say a few words that would express all the years of love you have showered on me, But the truth still remains that we can never question God, because everything he does is perfect.My world best Aunty may your joyous soul find peace with the Lord.      Amen

This is so sad! Rest on Olije, you will be missed.

It is still hard to believe you are no more here with us, it is so hard to breathe too. Oh Olije, may your gentle soul rest in perfect peace. We love you, we miss you.

*Dr Sebastian Wakdok I mean.

I never met you in person but we maintained contact over over a period of time when I helped you and your husband process Unijos transcripts for the Chevening scholarship. You were such an easy going person, full of life and hope and always cheerful as we spoke over the phone.
Heaven has truly gained an Angel.
God's comfort to Dr Stephen Wakdok my senior in Gindiri and the entire family and friends.

Sweetheart
Seeing you today, was heart wrenching.
Welcome back to your land of birth all the same.


God is too deep to be explain himself..but He should have pitied us and left you for us longer.
He is Omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent
He owes my brother, he owes your parents, he owes my parents. He owes us. He owes the people who depend on you. He owes the world who miss her impact. He owes the children whose Auntie and role model he called to himself.

I do not doubt God.
I do not question my faith in God.
I pray for my brother's faith, strength and mind.
I pray for our families, your friends and colleagues.

May God who gave us you and who took you from us fill your void himself in our lives. Amen.

You came, you saw and God conquered!

Blessed be God.

This is so hard! You gave no warning! There were no signs! It all still feels like a bad dream! It all still feels so unreal!

But I will not mourn you like one without hope. I know that He who loves you more than anyone else took you away at the time that was His best, and I thank Him through my pain! Thank you Lord, for the blessing of having this beautiful person in my life, even though for a short while!

Thank you for Olije's life, love, friendship, smiles, tears, pain, prayers, and all that I was privileged to share with her. Thank you for all she taught me about giving oneself, loving family, being principled, being strong, being different, self love, taking breaks, enjoying life, loving others in words and actions, loving You despite what life throws, and so much more! Thank you Lord!

My darling friend, sister, prayer partner, rest! You have run your race! Rest dear! Victory is ours in Christ Jesus, even in death!

Love you always!

Olije.. It's so hard to leave u a tribute, but we are consoled that u left us with a lasting memory of how gentle u were, u were kind and passionate. Rest in perfect peace dear.

Everyday since the news! I have sat down and read our chats! Looked through our pictures! Oh Olije! My no nonsense Olije! I am convinced that you enjoyed your life to the fullest! Your anthem “please there’s NO TIME for rubbish”.

You lived! You lived and loved! You enjoyed this life! You vibrated positivity and strength! I didn’t think I’d make it to write this but I heard you in my spirit saying you are fine! You said “you of all people should know I am fine”!!!

My journey here has changed by your passing! We planned life together! We moved cities! We hoped together! Now my angel stay warm in the real place of peace and continues praise! Bow with the angle and feast with them!! One day we will be feasting, praising, bowing and laughing together! Until then keep Shinning brighter than a diamond out angel!

Love**
Becky Mvande Ohiaeri

Your death is a sad shock. I can't understand it. Thanks for been my voice of reasoning and comfort when you heard about my husband's passing last year. I can't believe Its a goodbye..

SISTERS ARE ANGELS WHO LIFT US UP WHEN OUR WINGS FORGET HOW TO FLY .


I don't know why you had to go so soon but I believe God has a great plan. I find it difficult to accept that my sister, my best friend is gone, but you taught me to be strong. 

You gave me a true definition of friendship and made this friendship thing so easy, you were only one call away and always there to safe the day. I will always remember that special smile, that warm embrace you always give me,you were the big sister I never had, the best & greatest amongst friends so hard to find, harder to leave & impossible to forget, my encourager, my confidant, my strength, your kindness was out of this world. To everyone you met you left a print of joy, love, hope.To me you will forever remain my "priceless & irreplaceable big sister.

I sit here and ponder how very much I would like to talk with you today. There were so many plans we made and each time I think of you I know I will miss you.

I know how much you love me and how much I love you, For every time I think of you, you are right here deep within my heart.

You had so much to live for, you had so much to do, it still seems impossible that God was taking you, and though your life on earth is past, in Heaven it starts new.

You will live for eternity just as God has promised you.

And though you have walked through Heaven's gate we are never far apart.

I will always remember you my precious sister.

TO AN AWESOME LADY
The news of your death was very difficult and unbelievable to behold.
You came, shone like the star you were, vibrant, energetic, awesome and a-must-like personality ; you definitely touched lives my dear sister.
I wish you stayed much longer than you did, but your time came for you to be with the Most High God.
My wife and I wept when the sad news got to us, because you were so dear to us.
Your memory reigns in our home, and we'll forever remember you.
Adieu Olije!

I remember approving travel on behalf of LSHTM for you to collect data in Abuja for your MSc dissertation in 2018. Rest in peace, Olije and may the good Lord bring comfort and strength to all those you have left behind.

I don't think I can ever be ready to accept your departure into the world beyond,this huge shocking loss pierced my soul millions times in a split of second,the pains and anger I felt at once can never be explain,I can't imagine a movement without her being around,her strength,courage,rigor at discipline and work ethic as legendary and appreciated by all who knew her well,so you fought and you won,because you love the lord and held on to your faith,thank you for the beautiful and purposeful years you live while here on earth,always grateful to God for making our path cross.May God grant you eternal peace.
forever in my heart God's Mother.
Good night Endless Jewel
Till we meet to part no more.

My dear cousin sister Olije, the last time I saw you was 1991 about 30 years ago and you were very young and promising then, I have heard of your kindness and beauty inside of you but I never had the chance to feel this but I believe in the voices of majority. I can tell exactly what your siblings are feeling right now because I have been there too. My consolation is that we have a God over all our thought, decisions and life and he knows better. He didn't ask our permission to give you to us as a daughter, grand daughter sister, niece, cousin and wife. so he's never ever going to ask or take permission from us when he's going to take you away. I wish there's a death date like we also celebrate birthday so we can bide our loved ones goodbye. My consolation is in Isaiah 57:1-2. The righteous perishes, And no man takes it to heart; Merciful men are taken away, While no one considers That the righteous is taken away from evil. He shall enter into peace; They shall rest in their beds, Each one walking in his uprightness. Am sure you must have seen my beloved bestie brother Edwin Ogo Ella (AKA. Eddie Murphy) pls tell him that I still love and miss him every day. Like it is written, my dear sister olije, enter into your peace and rest till we meet to part no more.
                   Cornerstone Elakeche Matilda ogo-KYANA.

Dear Olije, it's shocking that I am writing a tribute at your passing. What a loss! I am still processing it.
My youngest sister, Ene truly treasured your love for her & the children. You lit everywhere you went with your warmth, kindness & sunshine.
Indeed you came, you saw, and you conquered in your short but very impactful life. You will be sorely missed.
Rest in the bosom of the Lord.

Dear Olije,
Our hearts are broken!!...........................
Words fail me............................................
You touched so many lives, you were an Angel who lived among us, a gift from God who shared with us your love.
I will always remember you as the ever smiling, gentle and elegant Queen!! I had always viewed you through the eyes of your darling Onyowo, oh how she loved her Oli she is devastated, we all are!!
May the lights lead you home.
Forever in our hearts