When asked at Area F Police Command why adeleke was being wicked to Omolola and if he would have done it if there was a child in the marriage, he responded, “Of course if there was a child, I won’t but I want to punish her, I want her to know she cannot just come and marry in our family and walk all over us!” The venom he spewed was so typical of the madness that gush from men who are drenched in the ego of self entitlement! A Nigeria trait my beloved husband hated with passion.

The woman he claimed walked all over “them” hosted them in rooms she furnished. Cooked for himself and his family so much so that he asked Olubunmi to learn from her culinary skills, drive him and his family to stores and malls and was responsible for their welfare. Visited with gifts. Counselled and cared for his daughters... Yet, his myopic summation of all she did was “walk all over us.”

The truth, he HATED her. All she did was not strong enough to melt his iron heart. He hated her for daring to marry a brother who was condemn d to wifelessness. Being wifeless meant he could hatch his plan of manipulating him to adopt his daughters. That way, upon his death, his daughters being young, he would become the sole administrator. But this carefully masterminded plan, hatched at a time he thought his daughters were named beneficiaries backfired when he found out after Bola Omoteso’s death that he had edited his beneficiaries

It has been over two years yet family chose to bury my peace with my husband. But Jesus has kept me sane, safe and secure in God’s everlasting arms.

If you have read anything online, consider it the crying out loud of a widow who endured abuse and attempt to perpetrate fraud for over two years before she decided that having mourned her husband, it was time to defend his right to his labour being used to keep his name alive, not symphonies by a man who claims to be his brother yet whose complicity and negligence led to his death.

I call upon you to stand with me in prayers and in publicity, not for only #JusticeforOmolola but in many areas that would entertain justice once justice is served.

I have read more tweets on black widow spider than “black” human widows since I began the campaign! Please join me to make the campaign VIRAL.

#TimeIsNow #EndWidowAbuse #JusticeforOmolola #JusticeforWidows #ReformProbateLaws #WomenParticipate #BlackLivesMatter

The paper below was presented by Mr. Yemi Ogundein, a retired banker and farmer. He is a member of the Solidarity Action Network (SAN), a movement for change md good governance towards better life for Nigerians shaped by Mr. Bola Omoteso.

For us to survive the present economic challenges, we would need to understand how we got to this present situation. In doing this; I would want to illustrate that with a story of a very successful Farmer called Farmer Bishi. Note: This story is without relationship to any individual living or dead.

Farmer Bishi was a very successful farmer of his time, he had ten (10) hectares of land and began by planting rice, known at that time as the New Grain. He started with one (1) hectare and began to make so much money, more than he needed. He sold his paddy rice (unprocessed) to his customers in other villages ad he bought other foodstuffs and all that he needed from other villages around including the processed rice which he planted. Year on year, he improved the yield on his one hectare cultivated land by use of fertilisers and mechanisation and sold his product at a higher price due to the increasing demand for his paddy rice, he became so wealthy and forgot that he had nine (9) other hectares. Soon other villages around started to complain and began planting his type of rice, others who could not afford the increasing price of rice switched to other carbohydrates like cassava. Farmer Bishi’s revenue began to drop as price of rice began to crash. He could no longer afford all the luxuries he enjoyed hitherto, he needed to buy processed rice, beans, vegetables and all other things he needed.

Farmer Bishi, a very religious person, began to pray and fast, called his spiritual leader and they prayed so much for many months but the situation never improved. He began to borrow money to meet his daily needs and satisfy the luxuries he once enjoyed but his debts grew larger and larger.

I guess at this point you know that all the actions of Farmer Bishi would never get him out of the challenges he has found himself. You will agree with me that God has not placed Farmer Bishi in this predicament rather he had been wasteful with God-given resources; prayer without works is simply dead.

This story illustrated above is the picture of our individual stories in Nigeria:

• He planted rice only on one hectare and bought all other things when we had capacity to plant other crops that would have provided a means of diversified income and added to his revenue.

• He refused to think of processing the paddy rice such that his expenses would have at least reduced on buying processed rice and he would have earned greater revenue if he sold processed rice instead of paddy rice.

• He never saved and so when challenges came he started to borrow without corresponding increasing revenue.

• He resorted to the spiritual without working. I thought that if he truly was spiritual, God would have told him what to do. Many of us pray and never listen or most probably, we don’t hear God.

TIPS FOR SURVIVAL

1. Embrace and strengthen your access to information and technology, you need to know what is happening around you; both informal and formal information are relevant. Information will enable you know your threats to survival such as projected price increase. Information will enable you know opportunities for survival, such as alternatives to the expensive goods you currently use. Technology on the other hand will enable you reduce your cost on the short and long runs. It will deliver information closer to you and bring you closer to opportunities. There are great apps that solve basic problems and deliver value. Escape from the stone-age and enter the future.

2. Sort, certify and utilise information; you need to understand that not all information are useful, not all are true and not all are relevant to you. So with the advent of technology, you can easily achieve this. What are the opportunities that are being floated? What skills are in demand? What products are in demand? What technology can make some tasks less expensive?

3. Readjust your prioritie. Itimes like these, resources will never be sufficient and indeed most times in life time, resources are never sufficient. You have to continue to reallocate your needs in-line with your resources. Where do you go, what do you do with your time, who do you talk to? All these decisions has cost implications. If you used to visit a friend just to gist and while away time; these are the times to review the benefits and what that relationship adds to you. If you are fond of staying in Church after service to talk for another two hours or engage in long meetings that could have taken a shorter time, it might be advisable to revise and develop a better strategy to make that meeting smarter and reallocate the excess time to personal development. Learn new skills and sharpen your competence in your field. Do you really need to do that party? Buy that “Aso Ebi"? Have three phones and pay for data on each? Think about these things.

4. By far the greatest challenge is EXPENSE PROFILING. Though, it seems very simple, it is not very easy. Expense Profiling embodies information gathering, priority adjustments and reality checks. It is a line by line, day to day and expense by expense review to determine if that expense is truly valuable at this time? Are there alternatives to this expense? Can I defer the expense? What value am I getting from this expense? What cost am I saving by making this expense? Can I achieve the same or better results using alternative means? These are critical questions everyone should and must ask before making expenses. Many of the needs we tend to worry about are not actually needs but wants. What would qualify as needs includes food, clothing, shelter and nothing else. You would agree with me that even our needs if healthy, basic and simple would actually not cost much. You really don’t need as much clothing as you seem to be seeking. Eating well and eating right can be very inexpensive, vegetables, fruits and cereals are very affordable. Expense profiling would require you to consider which means of transportation to use when going to a particular destination; should I use my car which has no air conditioning facility and stay in traffic for about 2hrs or simply take a BRT with air conditioning facility. Expense profiling would require you to review your telecommunication expenses, laundry expenses, power and electricity expenses, transportation expenses, car maintenance, feeding style and other expenses. With profiling, I’m not saying you begin to live like a pauper or deprive yourself of basic comforts, I’m simply saying be smart and effective with your expenses.

5. Build viable relationships, these are not the times to buckle and fail in the areas of relationship building. Many times due to fear and complex especially when our financial resources seems not to be at par with our contemporaries, we tend to enter our shell, avoid friends, families and associates. We must understand that in times like these where many seems to be struggling financially there are others who are actually getting better financially as cash never disappears at any time only that it is not circulating freely, so you need to know what others are doing to survive and get-by.

6. Do not keep cash but increase your cashflows. Sincerely these are not the times to continue to throw money into a savings account, keep cash at home or refuse to spend. Inflation is that silent stealer of value that is determined to take your money without removing your cash. Today, it is carrying a 15% ‘pump-action riffle’ and that cash; N10,000 you had in April has decreased to N8,500 as prices has jumped up. Keeping all your cash in a low yielding account (e.g. savings account) at this time is not a wise decision, as you can only attract 2% per annum or 0.17% flat which is 1/88th of the current inflation rate. Rather, buy what you need now and ensure your cash is circulating, let your cash be involved in commercial activity, so that it increases in value as inflation increases.

7. Eat healthy and watch your health. Due to the harsh economic environment people tend to skip meals to save money and worry had become very rampant. You must be careful to ensure that you are healthy enough to survive to see the time of plenty. After every difficult time, there would be a time of plenty and only the strong and living would be able to enjoy this time. Take lots of fruits, water, vegetables and cereals, do exercises, take walks, read a lot of books and share jokes. Just make yourself happy in every possible way you can.

8. Increase your faith and faithfulness. Beyond all, we’ve said and what you know, there is an indispensable supernatural being that controls the affairs of men. He controls times and seasons ensuring that difficult times do not last forever. Seek Him, draw closer, listen to Him and let Him direct your affairs.

Thank you.

Thanks so much for being a part of this vision.

Be sure to read the narratives and view the photos on this site and add your tribute if yet to do so. Feel free to share with others who met Deacon Bola Omoteso aka Baba Bolae. I spelt it as Bolay and was going to use that acronym for the leadership programme but only recently stumble on a sign off where he used that spelling

Thanks so much for being a part of this vision.

Be sure to read the narratives and view the photos on this site and add your tribute if yet to do so. Feel free to share with others who met Deacon Bola Omoteso aka Baba Bolae. I spelt it as Bolay and was going to use that acronym for the leadership programme but only recently stumble on a sign off where he used that spelling

Narrative 5: Delivered by Mr. Sunkanmi Shotonwa

Permit me to read from a friend who NEVER heard from him an idle word spoken about the woman that came into his life.

Beginning of quote

Could you have “stopped his transition” is a legitimate question to ask. I don’t think anybody can answer a “yes” or “no” to that. To do that would be to assume the status of God. Folly. The best anyone can do is to shed light on the circumstances of his transition. In that light, you might better understand what you could have done, couldn’t have done, might have done, or should have done.

I had many discussions with Bola about a sojourn in Nigeria, given his health care needs. That said, I look at his passing not as a question of whether one could have stopped his transition or not or persuaded him against a sojourn in Abuja.

For me, it is that he found you, he found peace, he found vigour, he found love, he found happiness. And, with you at his side, your community development, empowerment projects and zeal, he wanted to make the world a better place for many more. He wanted to help others to find happiness, and he wanted to be at his friend’s side in his time of need. He was fulfilled, he was loved, and he was happy in the end. He left me good memories for the rest of my life and inspiration till the end of my time.

Believe me, only a really, truly special person could have made Bola commit [to marriage]. I know. And only a truly exceptional person could have made Bola embark on an Abuja sojourn. That I know, too.

The attached put all this in context [his vision and his mission]. I hope somehow they help in your long, difficult journey.

End of quote

How could such a story of love to spouse, devotion to friends and dedication to an undeserving nation be cut short so soon?

Only God knows.

The Man and The Milestones 5 Part 5

*The Man and The Milestones 1-5 was written by Dr. Omolola Omoteso

Narrative 4: Delivered by Pastor Dapo Akinosun, lawyer, pastor and special senior aide to the VP

Deacon Bola Omoteso as minister at RCCG the Kings Court in NJ helped to shape lives. He was minister in charge of sunday school and teaching others brought a glow to his face. Without betraying his health challenges he would stand for an hour to teach, kneel in worship before ministering and give hope to many who were at fhe brink of endinf it all. His teachings brought about renewed love for studying about God and desire to worship in his local church.

He would joke to his friend the now VP after the American economy and challenge of his health almost snuffed life out of him that someone else would have committed suicide and always his friend's throwback was the Ijebu's have to much at stake to consider such. His laughter was cathartic, his smile was infectious, his excuded confidence that was strong wnough to light up a room. People did not understand why devotion to friendship mattered to him but in the comfort of his haven, he would tell the story of the friend who travelled all the way from Nigeria and stayed with him for a week while recuperating from surgery and the friend who got his back when he was down and broke and the friend who sent him tons of ChristiN books to strengthen his Christian faith. Big or small, he never forgot any act of kindness to him but those done by him are just being unfolded.

Yet behind all that was tucked away the disappointments with and from friends and family who tried to steal, destroy and kill. In God, he found peace and happiness and the warmth of a home that marriage lit up. A friend said, I know he was happiest in the last 5 years of his life.

He found a renewed vigour in his friend seeking an elective post. He took up the mantle and helped to shape the Solidarity Action Network (SAN) vision and its advocacy for change and good governance in the run up to the elections, came up with a number of discussion papers with a team of friends to assist the incoming government and returned home from the USA, where he had been for 29 years, as a measure of solidarity to Nigeria.

On January 6, 2016 he signed a contract to serve as an Economic Adviser on Trade & Investment in the office of the Vice President under a foreign government project. Nigeria's health system cut short his life on February 11, 2016. The vision of the amiable and selfless man continues through the Bola-Omoteso Memorial Watch (BMW).

As part of continuing, two heavy duty loudspeakers, purchased to expand his musical collection has made it to a church to continue to sound out God's worship, a sister here received monetary gift to further her education, a missionary received the same amount to support her selfless service in a village, an orphanage - Heart of God received the same amount, a widow is here today to receive hers, while a widows group waits in line. Such donations, this event and other programmes and projects spelled out on the BMW banner will continue in his living and loving memory with support from loved ones.

The Man and The Milestones Part 4

Narrative 3: Delivered by Mrs. Motunrayo Alaka nee Famuyiwa

After a fatal accident with his BMW sent him abroad for treatment, he was compelled on account of SCD and recurrent appointments to remain abroad. He quickly grew through the ranks.

He loved life and lived life but marriage was not initially part of the equation. Not that he could not afford it or find an "ele" but he felt it would be callous to have a woman go through his challenges with him. He travelled across the ocean for pleasure and in like measure engaged in charity.

One would not expect someone who looked as fragile as him to move near performance cars or musical instruments which required extra energy and agility but those were his passion - before he could drive one, he would pose by one. Soon he cruised with no care in the world and learned to play the trumpet later settling for the clarinet. There was no stopping him.

He outgave himself. The church had a building project and the fee was set at 5000 for workers, he gave for himself and for the woman that would come into his life. This must have been the point God succeeded in sowing marriage into his life.

After God brought the woman, crossing ocean to sign the dotted lines was the least of his problems. Like he needed to make up for lost years, he said "I do" 5 times before he could be reminded that once would have been enough.

Soon sensodyn gave way to herbal toothpaste, coffee gave way to green tea, spaghetti bolognese gave way to ogbo, lace became better than versacci and home baked bread started tasting better than mass baked. "My mother would have been shocked to see me eating ogbono but Omolola, you cook it so well! How did I end up with such a local woman" he would joke. Her throwback was, "I wonder o! Baba Oloyinbo like you; and all you were attracted to was a locally tush woman. See your life!"

Yet, she soon became the fashion police, better cheff, crazier yet safer chauffeur; he only just never agreed she had better ears for music and she never stopped wondering whether his love for cars and music would ever stop rivaling her best!

Narrative 2: Delivered by Mr. Segun Oshin, President 6872 Loyola College Alumni

Kindhearted, witty, amiable, seemingly quiet and hardworking, he started his career working as a sales assistant in his father's imported suit store. He told the story of how a man continued to save until he could afford one. The day he was able to pay, he said "Now when I talk, they would listen!" He new then that good life would only be meaningful with credible hard work. The man obviously saved through grit and grin to buy a suit not a coat.

He later served with the Centre for Management Development (CMD) as a corps member, joined the NIB and moved through the ranks building a network of powerful friends and building a vision of career excellence and success.

One story he told to establish that corruption had eaten deep into the fabric of our society from long ago was when Loyolans cried out to the Rev. Father about not being fed well from the dinning hall. An enquiry was set up, students were added to the food committee and they became part of the team that went to purchase food stuff.

Soon without adding extra income students started reporting cases of being over fed with the same amount that hitherto created moral panic. No journalist needed to report that fingers had been previously soiled by the same staff who were employed to protect the rights of children. Every case of corruption was sadness to his ears, he never could understand where individuals could own jets when many died in penury.

Another was the story of his bosom friend whose parents would always visit him in boarding school with his dog. Obviously a recent returnee or son of the rich but soon he got the name alaja and he quickly figured Loyola was not the place for such frivolities. What mattered was not what your parents acquired but what you are positioned to achieve in life. He never struggled for his portion at his father's table

He told the story of a Headboy's speeach when he needed to charge up the students in relation to never succumbing to being beaten down by folks from other schools... Always with a smile he would recount with the head boy's closing line, God in Heaven, Loyolans on earth.

Such was the wisdom that shaped his path

Narrative 1: Delivered by Mr. Ogunojemite, Bola's friend from childhood

Born with SCD Bola Omoteso made up his mind to never let that define him. He had a father who loved and gave him the best and mother who did not think it was necessary for him to be treated differently.

He had many stories and one was his place of birth. Many who thought he was "Yanmirin" were somewhat right because he was born during a parental away match in far away Opobo where his aristocratic father was deployed as a General Sales Executive for GB Olivant.

Yet he grew to speak Yoruba well and English flawlessly and was appauled by the decadence that have eaten so deep into the fabric of our culture such that values and language were no longer important.

As far back as when he was in Loyola his dad had to ask again and again if he needed pocket money and he seldom did. He was prudent and had his eyes on investing. He recalled an occasion where a sibling had asked their family driver to secretly buy him chicken from left over lunch money. The driver came in and announced the mouth watering purchase within Baba Bola's hearing shot. Baba did not have to ask who, because he knew Bola was a saver. He descended on the culprit with laws of investment 101.

While at UNILAG he invested in music and would make his way to witness FELA Live. He could read and make out the arrangements by Fela himself and those by others. In later life he fell in love with the music intelligence of Miles Davis. He began to invest in records, books and music lessons. Along the line, he decided that while the music of these two resonated with him, the booze, drugs and women did not. Such was his discipline and passion.

The Man and The Milestone Part 1

Many who met Bola Omoteso would attest to the fact that he remained kind, caring, deeply spiritual and loyal. He was dearly admired by friends, neighbours, colleagues, staff and tenants. Mr. Oshin, during his condolence visit, kept saying, “Decent man!”

He was optimistic about the possibility of setting up a research centre in OOU (a location close to his roots in Oru, Ijebu) or endowing a chair in UNILAG (his Alma Mater). Consequently, his wife with whom he privately discussed this would love for siblings and friends to make this happen via the following mediums:

What stories did he not tell about Loyola College and the beautiful people he met there! A living pointer to what Loyola meant to him could be a computer centre, care centre or library wing (with titles in his areas of interest) in his name. It would be a pleasure to discuss and institute this with his 68 – 72 class set.

Establishing Adebola Research Centre (ARC) at Olabisi Onabanjo University (OOU) where one or all of the following, Sickle Cell Diseace, Kidney Disease, Cancer and Fibroids, would be researched. Such a centre will go a long way to save lives.

Endowing a chair in the Business Administration department of University of Lagos.

Sponsorship of 2 indigent students who would come to be known as Adebola Omoteso Scholars in either university. Preference would be given to candidates from Oru in Ogun State or Obanikoro in Lagos State.

He was at the verge of instituting a Lecture Series for his friend the VP of NG. While we will go ahead to do that in his memory, another will be instituted in partnership with the Solidarity Action Network (SAN) in his honour. It would be tentatively called Bola Omoteso Leaders Assembly (BOLA). Issues relating to national development especially in the area of the economy will be discussed.

We can all become Cares Campaign Advocates, for Kidney Disease centres and other centres set up for those with life threatening medical issues, to have intensive care units (ICU) or personnel. The Renal Dialysis Centre in Allen Avenue, Lagos where Bola Omoteso died did not have an ICU; if they did, Bola Omoteso may still be with us today.

Should you be interested in being a part of The Adebola Memorial Vision, please email Omolola via annecares@hotmail.com. Thank you and God bless.