Sometimes it's so easy to say, Time heals! That's true in context. But it's also true that events and places in the present, whenever there's a familiar setting, trigger treasured memories that leave us just sighing and saying, God knows best! I have so much memories to share about Oqua, but picking on one leaves me wondering how hard it appears that one doesn't know where to start from, or what to say. Should I touch on the memories of the Street we grew up? First Park? The Samsung Childhood photos? My nickname, 'Zimondo'? Or the ones from the last high school? What about FirstBank? Truth is, I'll come up with something to share soon enough, that will not only bring back those cherished memories, but will be a great inspiration to all!

Many Christians have a wrong view of death. We think we’re going from the land of living to the land of dying. But the opposite is true. If you know Jesus, you are going from the land of dying to the land of the living. Here are some of the images the Bible uses for the death of a Christian: going to sleep and waking up in heaven . . . moving from a tent to a mansion . . . walking from the darkness into a well-lit room . . . coming home to see your family and friends . . . being set free from prison . . . taking a long journey to a new land . . . riding a chariot to the New Jerusalem . . . moving into a brand-new home . . . opening a gate to a brand-new world. for all of the things you taught me, I say thank you. We miss you dearly but we believe you're in a better place. Solong Oqua!!! 

Hard to forget how we met: competing for who could fit the entire airplane snack in their mouth the best. Not sure who won, but I was sure I had found a friend for life.

And that's who you were: easygoing and fun, yet serious and responsible when it was warranted, with a large heart. I just want to say thank you for the fun memories, and for touching the lives of many in as many ways as you knew how, no matter how small.

You are missed. 

I still remember the first day we met. It was your first year in Unical.  At Anietie Okon's place. You came it straight with a joke! I immediately asked who you were and we started talking right from  there. You were so much fun, always making fun cracking jokes and beating me at Tekken. I still find this hard to understand and question it all. The Lord Almighty knows best. This tribute board is a testament to who you were as a person and I pray your children will grow to read them  to appreciate  the kind of person you were, maybe just maybe it will help fill the void. You left too soon but like they always say there is a method to the madness and there is a grand plan.

RIP Oqua Itu. May the Lord almighty comfort your family.

There isn't much you can say to someone who truly lost their heart, least telling them you understand what they are going through. When my wife called, I couldn't help myself. I tried to imagine what my world would mean without that person who gave my nights meaning. That person whose words is so powerful, it fueled every single second of your life.

I find that instead of speaking to death and elevating it beyond life, looking down at what was and what could be, letting pain and anger consume me. Instead of giving death another day from which it could steal more than a moment in time.

Instead, let me speak of things that will always be. Let me speak about a man who stood head above shoulders to his peers, me included. A man who found time to give more of himself to his family and friends. A man who stood by many. A proud son of the people who relished in culture and people. Even if it meant showing off a few ekombi moves or dressing in his full traditional attire. And if you dare question his moves, he will respond with his ‘shoki’, ‘running man’ or ‘etigi.’ He was truly gifted.

Oqua's gifts didn't end in just his feet, he was a gifted banker. Anyone who ever sat across the table from him can tell you how much they respect his quiet, but persistent aura that filled the room. He made you feel safe and sold his every word. His carefully placed words and smile could calm the strongest storm from an angry client. He cares about everyone and more importantly he knew how to show it indeed and deeds.  I am yet to meet a soul who would cast this lot as false

There’s a lot I will never understand about life and living. Why the rain falls on the righteous and the evil. Why the race is not to the shift or the battle to the strong, why time and chance happen in all things. I will never truly understand...but I know how I feel. I know that sadness that has over taken my soul and drowned my very understanding of life and death. Yet I find that I am not afraid of death. Like Oqua I will live everyday with love and joy.

When my last sunrise beckons upon my soul and my star is at its highest peak, when I’ve given my last laughter and filled my sweetness with kisses, when my tomorrow is nothing more than memories of kindness and warmness for no reason or season. Then like Oqua I ask the Lord to give me those amazing words, frozen forever in time. His last words

Kami, iris and Zina; inestimable assets of mine

The journey has been rough and it's been fine

You all give me joy beyond definition 

I cherish every moment spent

I appreciate everything learnt

His last words

Neither man, woman, devil, evil, sadness, darkness, pain, sin, death or earth can keep us from our love. Now unto him that kept Oqua, loved Oqua and owns Oqua. Our immortal beloved; Father, savior, lover and friend. Unto him who is, was and will ever be. We trust Oqua till we meet again. True God, One God forever.

Amen

I am standing behind because I hadn't participated in rehearsals, so barely knew the song, but I still had to join men. Two years down the road, they made me President of the Fellowship and we had our first outing just about two months ago and trust Oqua not to have disappointed us when he was called upon to perform.

We had so much fun. He was such a reliable guy. Ever smiling.

Adieu our trusted Treasurer,  brother and friend.

“Was that really necessary?” - Oqua Oqua Itu

 That’s an old joke Oqua and I share. It was a silly story about a homeowner hearing a knock at the door. He opens it and there’s no one there apart from a snail near his door mat. He promptly picks the snail up and flings it deep into his front garden. A few months later……………..the home owner gets another knock at the door, and same scenario, sees a snail; only this time, the snail asks “was that really necessary?” Since then, whenever we heard something silly, or unbelievable, we would ask the “famous snail question”!!!! 

Ironically, that’s the first thing that came to my head when I heard that my younger bro had packed his things and left for Heaven. Oqua always liked doing things differently; I guess that’s why you chose to sign out in style, with that amazing post to your darling wife and family! The words are etched in our hearts forever. Fortunately, God knows best, and He reminds us that it’s not for us to wonder, ponder or lament. He is always in TOTAL CONTROL.

A few quick updates that you may have missed; we won the Charity Shield & Pogba (as you predicted) has moved to back Manchester United. The Naira has fallen to N400/$. I acquired a new sideboard; styled after the one I saw in your living room in March when we finally stopped by to visit Zina! The road between Calabar and Uyo can no longer be called “a road”. Aniekeme is happily married & now a father of two!!!!

Oqua, you’ve played your part. It’s an honour that we bumped into ourselves along your journey. We laughed, cried, “stained”, joked, raced and rescued each other along the way. There were bailouts, car purchases, weddings, “rituals”, debates, arguments and prayers. 

There are so many things to remember: Flashback…….The routine of grabbing Chicken and Chips at Peniels! Delivering Valentine gifts to Ilaa in 2006! Riding to work together in your Honda “Bullet”! Going to eat “Harvard” Spring Rolls at Marian Hotel! Taking the pictures Ilaa and I used on our Wedding Programme! Your stellar coordination of drinks at my wedding reception, with Ndi Okon providing “covering fire”! The laptop lease purchase that took forever to conclude! Saturday morning cleaning and rearrangements of both our houses! The surprise party Ekamma planned and executed flawlessly; you promised you’d get me back for not letting you in on the secret. When exactly will you do that? Oh okay, I forgot, it’s supposed to be a surprise, so I guess it won’t be right for you to tell me now, would it? I could go on and on.

Well, it’s apparent that you chickened out of our last challenge; who’d shed the most weight in our race to the Calabar Festival December 2016. I guess you’ve lost that one!!!!

Still Bro’, you’ve left me with a number of lessons and I pray that God gives me the grace to keep remembering them:

To serve in God’s vineyard: Every Saturday evening of yours was dedicated to an activity in church. Family is everything: You were always there for Ekamma, Zina & Iris. Well, now that you’re away, my wife, daughter & I will always be there for them. That’s a promise!!! Life: You made out time to have go out and smell the roses. Lions’ Club, Eastside functions and weddings. You made every day count.

 

I have not read this through. I am just clicking away on my keyboard because I know that right about now, time isn’t my friend and I have to send this out before we send you forth on Saturday, August 13th (My 5th Wedding Anniversary …you got me there…nice one!!!!). I sincerely hope it conveys my angst, hope and faith.

Oqua is, and always will be, my brother. See you on the rebound Bruv’!!!

Even though I am still tempted to ask if indeed, it was really necessary.

1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

Akan (“Ekpo Okon Eyo”) Akpadiaha

Dear sir, I find it hard to believe your demise. You have been a great young man, so cheerful at every situation. Even at work you were outstanding, in Church ... Everyone is crying. I can't say Big Bro... Rest in Peace My Big Friend... May God give your family the grace to bear your loss. It is well with your soul. Samuel

I have known Oqua for well over 13 years and closely so. For those number of years I had opportunity of shaking hands with the young and most humble man almost every weekend, except when either of us was out of town. During that time, I can't remember ever seeing Oqua frown or take a swipe at anyone. Not even children who almost took his free mindedness for granted. It is actually difficult to know where to start, especially because we were just becoming closer by virtue of my recent responsibility in Church, after he plotted with few others to bestow the responsibility of leading the men on me. As the Treasurer of the Audacious Men's Fellowship of the Springhouse,  our Church, the place that bonded us under one dynamic Pastor for all the time I have known this young man. We were just settling down to work when this shockingly unpleasant development arose.

We will certainly miss this wonderfully good hearted friend of all.