This memorial is for you my beautiful Nanna, and well for me too. I'm still in Scotland so I've only been to the crematorium a couple of times and to be honest I don't feel you there. I light candles for you in church on your birthday, mothers day, christmas and that horrible day in February that makes my eyes and throat burn all day long and for days afterwards. It's a silly gesture but I don't know how else to try and be near you at will. You catch me unawares all the time. When I'm laughing with my children I feel you hug my heart and when I'm at my lowest you come to me in my dreams telling me to stop being so soft and I wake up smiling even though it aches. They told me time was a healer Nanna but they lied. I still get a lump in my throat and tears pricking my eyes a moment before I even realise it's you I'm crying for. I love you with my whole heart and more and I'll miss you for always. Sleep tight x x x