Life's been rough for everyone in the family since Mom's passing. I wanted to put this together for all of us to go to whenever we need that few minutes to regroup. Putting this tribute together about Mom for everyone to look at brought many many tears in my eyes as well as me sitting at the computer laughing out loud looking at some of these pictures/videos and reminiscing, as I am sure you all will too. 

Anyone can add a story to this site, you can add pictures, you can even add music so please add your memories of Mom/Nana so we can always remember the special times we have ALL had with the most truly amazing woman in our lifetime! I don't have some pictures I am sure you all may have so please post your pics on here. If you are unsure how, please ask me or just send the pics to me and i'll upload them to the site. There is no limit on pics, music, videos...anything! This is ours for life!

~We Love You Mom~ Your Always In Our Hearts~

Mom (Patricia Ann Knouse) was born in Benton, PA. on April 14, 1936. She was the youngest of 11 children! Mom used to say "Grammy said I was a change of life baby"! 

I can say Mom and Grammy pretty much had the same relationship me and Mom had! Boy oh boy did she cherish her! Grammy's real name was Anna Mae Knouse and was born on February 2, 1891 and passed away in 1980 at 89 years old! She was the sweetest Grammy anyone could ask for, just like Mom was the best Mom anyone could ask for! 

I never got to meet my Grandfather, Ralph Knouse, he passed away suddenly in his 40's of a heart attack. 

Mom and Dad were married 22 years and had 4 children: Paulie, Karen, Diane and Vicky! They were the best parents you could ask for! Us kids never went without anything! Our family home was in Rochester, NY and our home address was 60 Ontario St. We lived directly across the street from Mt. Carmel School so that was great! 

Mom was a "stay at home Mom" and she was the best at it! I remember Mom's spring cleaning! All of the walls washed down with spic and span (and nothing else), Mom would wash the Venetian blinds in the tub, change the color of curtains each season, she just worked all day, everyday!

Dad worked for the City. He was a hard worker for many years and supported us like no other Dad! Dad retired from the City early as he suffered a back injury while at work and then retired early. At that point Dad started buying corner stores and that's where we all worked! Mostly them, open to close. We owned a total of 3 stores: First store was on the corner of Clifford Ave and Thomas St., Second store was on University Ave. and the third was on Scio St. Having the stores was a ton of work for them, eventually Mom and Dad sold the stores. 

I titled this Chapter 1980 because this was a life-changing year for Mom. Grammy passed away, Mom was heart broken, as any daughter would be who lost their Mom. We took off to Pennsylvania to attend Grammy's funeral. 

Upon our return home, Mom and Dad's 22 year marriage ended. Dad relocated to Puerto Rico and then it was just Mom and us kids. Mom tried to find a job asap to pay our $132 mortgage but no one would hire her since she basically had no work record other than the hard worker she was staying home. We lost our home and moved into an apartment at 502 Lake Ave. It was just Me, Mom and Paulie. Karen was married to Junior and Diane lived with her boyfriend.

So....you'll find this funny! Bryan and I were living together starting our future and decided we wanted to have a baby! Karen only had Juni and Danny at the time and wanted to "try for a girl"......well needless to say, I got pregnant!.......and so did Karen........and so did Diane! OH NO! All 3 daughters are pregnant and we need to tell Mom who was living in PA with Paulie! So, I called Paulie and said, "I have some news I want you to tell Mom", he says "what news?", I said "I'm pregnant!", he said "well that's great! I know you've been trying!", I said.... "well there's more".....he said "Karen's pregnant?", I said "YES!", he said "well she wanted to go for a girl right?".....I said "well there's more".....He said "Don't tell me Diane's pregnant too?"....I said "YES!" Needless to say we made it Paulie's job to tell Mom all 3 of her daughters were pregnant! And we all wanted girls!! Diane and I were both due in December, 1985 and Karen was going for a C-section in January, 1986!

Life was great! I had my first born on 12/12/85, Diane had Alecia on 12/16/1985 and Karen was ready to deliver Adri in January! We all wanted girls and we all got them! Mom was ecstatic! She moved back to NY to help us all out. Paulie was still in PA.

And then "that morning" came, it was a cold, snowy morning on January 16, 1986, around 7am I hear a knock on my door. Bryan and I got up, opened the door and Mom and Tony were standing there. The look on Mom's face was one I never saw, I said "Mom.....", she was crying and said "There's been an accident", I said "An accident? With who?", she said "Paulie", I said "Ok, what kind of accident Mom? He's ok right?"......she said "He's dead"......I just looked at Mom with such disbelief, there's no way this is true, this is a dream, God wouldn't take our Rock from us, No way. There's no description I can give to describe my emotions, I lost the only brother I've ever had at 26 years old? He was the glue to this family after my Dad left and now he's gone. Mom lost a piece of her heart, she lost her Mom, Dad left and now Paulie's gone in 6 years. Life is never gonna be the same again, and it never was. Mom's heart was forever broken, therefore so was mine. This can't be true, he was just in NY the week before to see Nicole & Alecia for the first time. Never got to see Adriana, life was so great, why this?

We found out the night of the accident Paulie left to go to the store to buy pampers and dog food and was going to call Mom as soon as he got back to let her know Wendy was pregnant with their 3rd child. And now he's gone..... Paulie left behind 4 children: Patricia (named after Mom), Paulie Jr., Aimee and Tiffany was Paulie's last born he never got a chance to see. 

Paul Frederick Izquierdo 6/2/1958-1/16/1986

Things were rough for Mom after the loss of Paulie, it was hard to celebrate the holidays, especially Thanksgiving (Paulie's favorite holiday) and Christmas but Mom tried. She did it for her family. Mom worked and worked to keep busy at the Arcade Sandwich Shop downtown. She was now living with Me and Bryan and our relationship was never better! Mom was my best friend! I could go to her and talk to her about anything, and I mean anything and I knew she always had the right answer, may not be the answer I wanted but it was the right one. If it came from Mom, then its good! Mom left the Arcade Sandwich shop and was working in the bakery at Tops Markets part time. Eventually she quit working due to her rheumatoid arthritis effecting her hips and knees. She had both hips replaced first in the 90's and both knees years later. 

Mom spent her time with her grand kids, her daughters, taking spur of the moment trips to PA to see Judy and family. She was one to always be on the go! The kids were off to school and Mom was off in her car going here and there, keeping busy. She loved to go to bingo too. Mom was an awesome cook but eventually got tired of it and passed that along to me! Mom would do anything for anyone, no matter what! She taught me so much I can't put it all into words, a lot of lifes lessons, a lot. 

As Mom grew older she didn't really get out to socialize to meet friends. She was the baby of the family so most of her siblings had passed away or lived in PA so she only saw them when she went to PA to visit. 

One friend Mom had right off the get was Shelvy, my mother-in-law. They hit if off and became best friends! At one point Shelvy and Mom were both living with me and Bryan and they used to get up on "check day" and take off! They would go to Ames, Walmart, the dollar store, tops and to lunch and come home and tell me about their adventure! Two peas in a pod for sure!! They were both so good for each other it was so special to see both of them happy! They loved to just sit at the kitchen table smoking their cigarettes and drinking their coffee. Sometimes they would play yahtzee all day! It was a very special friendship.

Eventually Shelvy moved to Maryland to be with her daughter Teresa to help her out. They sure did miss each other.

And then that day came....Bryan and I were in Maryland, Bryan's father Norm passed away. The morning of the services Shelvy and I were in the kitchen preparing food for family to eat afterwards. I noticed Shelvy struggling when cutting an onion. I asked her if she was okay, she said she's been having this pain in her shoulder and it was killing her to use it. She said she was tired because her shoulder was keeping her up at night. I told her she should make a doctor appointment to see what it is. She did, she had an x-ray then a CT, the pain in her shoulder was a large pancoast tumor...cancer. 

After Shelvy had her PET scan she was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer. The day we found out Shelvy was on her way to NY to go to the Wilmot Cancer Center for treatment. The best they could do for Shelvy was four aggressive chemo treatments. Shelvy moved in with us, we had her hospital bed and her oxygen machine in the living room. Mom literally would wake up every morning and spend the entire day in the living room with Shelvy. They watched endless episodes of family feud or just sat there talking to each other. Shelvy passed away on May 4, 2013. Mom was heartbroken. I never realized it until Mom said to me one day "You know, Shelvy was the only friend I had left and she's gone. All of my brothers and sisters are gone too, I have no one who is my age left in my life". Mom suffered so much loss and Shelvy's passing was so devastating for everyone I guess I never imagined the impact that would have on Mom. 

Losing my Mom has been the most difficult thing to deal with. Yes, i'm aware of what grieving for someone feels like, I had that with Paulie......but this is "MOM", the only person who has known me the longest, the only person i've known the longest, the only Best Friend I had that I could tell anything to, and last but not least the most wonderful, caring, compassionate woman I will ever meet in life. I miss her every single day of my life. The only thing that helps me move onto the next day is knowing Mom is at peace and she is happy. Dementia is the most horrific disease ever. To see this strong-willed woman go from that to not even knowing who she is, and on some days didn't know who we all were is just the most heartbreaking experience I wouldn't wish on anyone. To know she isn't living in that hell helps, who am I to wish she was here? She's at peace, she told me prior to her passing on her "good days", "I'm tired, I'm ready"......and I knew she was. 

My last visit I had with Mom, I knew it was my last.....I whispered in her ear "well Mom, everyone has been here to see you except one person and you know who that is (Her oldest Grandson, Juni who would've been here sooner but the airport was shut down due to snow) and if you want to wait for him, he will be flying in at 5pm tomorrow, I will have him here to you by 5:30pm, I promise.If you don't wait, I'll know that's what you wanted" It was just so hard to look at my idol knowing I wasn't going to see her again, my tears just flowed. I then said "Mom, you have to give me a sign you are in heaven, you found Paulie and Grammy, please give me a sign Mom and you know from telling me what signs are so please let me know you are good Mom." Needless to say Mom passed away the following morning right before 11am, right after Juni boarded his plane and was on his way here not knowing what happened. I went to see Mom, didn't want to let go, didn't want to leave her but I did and as i walked out of nursing home what do I see? The biggest, fattest, prettiest robin ever! I knew it was Mom, no doubt in my mind. It stood there next to my foot and did not move. I bent down and put my finger out and she pecked my finger three times! When I visited Mom before I left her I would always give her three kisses on her forehead. I know Mom knew I needed that sign and that's just Mom, always giving everyone anything they need.

       ~I Love You Mommy~ I miss you ~ Your Always In Our Hearts~