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De Soul Centre

June 13, 2021
We all sat in for a drink and some grilled fish at De Soul Centre in Lagos. It was with you, Innocent, Uche, and his wife Sandra. This was in March, and I was about to leave Lagos for good. Knowing I will not be doing this hangout with the bunch in a while, I played host on the evening. 

Now everything about that evening has a new meaning to me. I will come back to that.

2013, at the prime of our youth, a budding stage of our careers, Innocent and I shared an apartment. Although we had been schoolmates, played basketball together and hung out together, I got a deeper insight into Innocent Chukwukelu, his true essence, and your undeniable positive impact on who he is today. He is a great man, and fate should have been kinder to him by preserving you on earth even for a day longer.

The first time we met was in a cramped bus in Ijesha, Lagos. While innocent carried the rusty gas cylinder we just bought for the apartment, I followed with the tabletop gas cooker.This was 2 months after we moved into the apartment. He sat next to you, while I sat by the window. We looked like we were back from digging trenches along Adeshina street. Innocent, donning his ever-reliable "Rocha, John Rocha" T-shirt, patterned with dust and rust, and with dusty feet, while I...(shall not mention my appearance on the day. I was worse). This was after a long sweaty day of repairs, and household shopping.

Although being quite reserved and a bite size sensitive, Innocent struck a conversation with the light bulb in the back seat with us. Seconds before you alighted with your sister, whom you had seated on your thigh through the trip, Innocent whipped out his phone to ask for your number. He handed over to you, his dim screened Nokia 1100, a contraption held together by 2 rubber bands. To my surprise, you obliged with a smile, passing over your your Blackberry Bold flagship. A second of pride from you would have cost us the beautiful moments that you have us. 

You never stressed Innocent at all. A few calls and a date later and Innocent said to me, "I never knew I'll be privileged to date a Girl like this".

I had the pleasure of living in the same house with you and Innocent. 1001 dates and awesome moments later, you handed Innocent the palm wine, and next I was giving a toast as the best man telling this story.

I watched you both grow as a couple. Your relationship with Innocent was so close and beautiful that we "the Goofers" cheekily morphed your name into a verb 'benny', meaning, to be bound or confiscated by a woman.
While we felt you made Innocent less crazy, and more scarce from the pack, being 'bennied' became a keyword we used for friendly banter amongst us. This remained unbeknown to you and Innocent until that day in March.

We soon realized that we all wanted to be 'bennied'. I guess we grew older and wiser. It was a secret code among the boys, and we used it for years.

Only a few urged me more than you and Urch to get into a relationship and get 'bennied'. While Uche would hitch me to any female who crosses the streets, you would without judgement, in that calm charisma, smile, and encourage me to never relent. 


I thought that final night at De soul Center was about me. I knew I will miss everyone, and so I wanted to have us sit and talk. That was the first time we broke the code 'benny' to you. I could see the blush on your yellow face, I guess you didn't know you were so much of an influence and an inspiration to us all. We all talked about everything that night, our lives in Lagos so far, our mistakes, losses and winnings. Opened up on some pending issues and ironed out a few creases.

I was wrong. That night in March had nothing to do with me. It was about you all along. At the end of the evening, when I told you our next meeting must be in a better place, I didn't mean heaven, I meant Canada. I guess you misunderstood me. 
Oddly this all happened at a place called De "Soul" Centre. Little did we know that your beautiful soul will be harvested by God.

You were a bright spark to us all, and you have a special place in our hearts.

We love you Benny
June 13, 2021
Your exit is very painful and shocking..  May God be with your family and give strength to carry on..
Rest on Trish.. You will be greatly missed..

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