I was watching my little Granddaughter Megan and how she LOVES her 'Bubble Guppies'.  I have to let her watch them every day on my phone or I won't here the end of it...lol.  Anyway It reminded me of Pat when he was a kid.  I had to watch Disney's 'Fox and the Hound' nearly every day for like 2 years or more.  He absolutely loved that movie!  There was also 'All Dogs go to Heaven' and of course '101 Dalmations'.  I guess you can see the pattern, all movies about dogs.  Pat has always loved all animals. 

I still remember watching Nick Jr. with him every day after we would drop Katie of at school.  He still had a year to go before he started so that was our time.  We would watch 'The Rugrats' and he loved 'The Adventures of David the Gnome'.  Hmm, probably why he used to talk to the Gnome statue his Poppy had in his back yard.  Well, now it's at my house to be with Pat forever.  

As he got into his teens him, me, Marion & Justin would alway have to watch 'The OC'.  It was corney but it was our time together.  He was the biggest fan of the "Fast and Furious' series of movies.  So ironic that Paul Walker was also killed tragically at such a young age. 

Way back when Pat was about 5 when we lived in Yardville, there was this house down the road that really went all out for Halloween.  This guy had a dead guy on his roof, zombies running around, spooky music going, the whole dry ice and strobe lights effects.  Really good shit.  Well, he wwould play the Leatherface from Texas chainsaw massacre.  It was pretty damn scary even to me.  Patrick refused to even go to this house for 2 years.  But on the 3rd year he kept saying "I'm going to go to that house on halloween, you'll see.  I'm not scared of that house anymore!"  So when halloween finally came we kept reminding him that he said he would go to that house.  He was like "I know! I know!".  When we turned the corner to that house I could see Pat getting scared so I said "you don't have to go there If you don't wanna", but Pat said "yes Dad, I do".  So he breathed deep, let go of my hand and walked straight up to Leatherface and all 3 foot something of him looked up at the guy and said "I'm not scared of you anymore!".  The guy laughed , we all began to laugh and the guy gave Pat a handfull of candy and walked Pat around to look at all the props.  Pat always faced his fears head on, even as a child he showed how brave he was.  He carried that with him even when he left us and taught us all how not to be afraid anymore.

When Pat was 3 or 4 years old he was angry and upset and was gonna run away.  He was gonna hide somewhere that I couldn't see him, that'll teach Daddy to holler at me!  He stormed out the front door to the sidewalk where I saw him standing there with a small waste paper basket over his head.  I told Katie to go get Pat and ask him what the heck he's doing with a gargage can over his head standing out on the sidewalk.  She came back and told me that I would never find him because if he couldn't see me then I'd never be able to see him underneath the can.  Another classic in a lifetime of pure comical genious this kid had.  I close my eyes and I can see him standing there with that basket over his head as if it just happened yesterday.  Patrick, when God made you he broke the mold.  You were 1 of kind.

Christmas morning will never be the same without Patrick.  But we share the fun that used to be every time we speak of Christmas.  Patrick and Justin would get up every Christmas morning, sometimes as early as 3:00, wake Katie up and make her get up to see what Santa Claus brought.  Mind you, they are now well in there teens!  Katie would be telling them to go back to bed but did they?  Nooo, they would make Mare and I a cup of coffee and bust into our room to get us up.  We'd be looking at a 17 year old and a 15 year old saying "What the hell are you doing up already!"  But we'd get up and get the camera and stumble downstairs and watch them like little kids every single year.  Wow, what I would give to wake to that just 1 more time!!!

Whenever we went out to eat and Pat was there it always turned into an adventure.  I remember we were all out to a nice sit down dinner and Mare and I would try like hell to keep the comical antics to a minimum.  That wasn't happening from the get go.  The waitress is taking orders and she comes around to Pat.  " Sir, would you like Soup or Salad."  Pat's replies " Hell yes, I'll have a Super Salad!"  We all just lost it including the waitress, she's like "No, do you want soup - or - Salad."  Pat with that silly grin and turtle neck was like "OHHH, ok I'll just have salad then."  CLASSIC!!  Everytime a waitress asks any of us that we think of that time and laugh.  BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES of you Patrick!

II can still remember the 1st time Pat was put in the Penalty Box in ice hockey.  It was when he played his 1st season in Medford.  Mind you Pat was no stranger to commiting penalties in roller hockey, he always lead the team in penalty minutes.  But this was ice and he wasn't yet used to the heavy pads but he still wanted to be pro.  As he eagerly watched the last seconds of his 2 minute minor count down he couldn't do the 10 year old way of opening the box door and skating out.  Not Pat, he had to hop the boards like the NHL players do only what he didn't see was the entire play was coming up the ice along the boards where he jumped over.  I saw him hit the ice and turn to see 2 teams worth of skaters bearing down full speed right at him.  He tried like hell to get out of the way but the whole bunch of kids just plowed right into him like a giant car crash.  Kids were flying all over the place and Pat just lay there like a deer that got spun around by a car. Everyone in the crowd laughed their asses off.  I thought I was gonna wet myself I laughed so hard.  He just got up and jumped right into whatever was left of the play.  What a character.  He not only was a very skillful player but he also brought plenty of comedy to the game as well. 

One thing about Pat was he always would go the extra mile to make us laugh.  I remember this time we were all watching this comedian on TV and he said if you want to screw with the person at McDonalds just order a McDonalds Fun Pack and point at the menu.  So we all go to McDonalds one day, none of us are thinking about that and we place our orders. Pat walk up to the counter and says "I'll take a McDonalds Fun Pack." The lady looks at him and says "We don't carry that sir." So Pat points at the menu behind her and say "Yes you do, it's right there on the menu next to the Happy Meal!" No shit if she didn't turn around and was looking for it. We all just busted up laughing. She didn't think it was to funny though.

I dreamed about you again last night. It was very real. It was about hockey to start with. I was watching you play hockey and Kevin B,  Kenny & You were all on the Flyers Youth team.  You guys were playing for the title but even though you played great you came up just short.  Then the dream took me to the mountains by myself with Ginger.  We were walking around a golf course surrounded by the mountains.  It was peaceful and serene.  As I was leaving I ran into the 2 boys with their mothers.  I showed them in the club house that the game you had just played was on National TV.  I then left with Ginger and as I drove off towards home it was you sitting next to me.  You didn't say anything you just sat and smiled at me like before.  As I was getting onto the highway to go home, the on ramp just kept rising higher and higher into the sky.  I began to get hyper and started panicking but you just stayed calm and smiled at me.  Eventually I calmed down and kept driving on.  The road seemed to turn upside down as it climbed through the clouds and left the Earth behind.  I felt at ease as we continued to rise higher and higher as if we were just flying away together. I looked over at you and you just smiled to me.  Then I awoke to realize it was just a dream.  Or did I just spend one precious moment more with you that I can only achieve through the magical world of dreams.  I'm counting on the latter of the two.  However you reach out to me, whether in a dream, a cool breeze on a hot summer day or just a visit from a momma bunny and her newborn baby, I will always be here for you son.

With spring coming, all my thoughts are turning to Pat.  He loved the spring.  I see him and feel him everywhere.  I look at the flowers blooming and think of how he loved to manicure every yard we had.  The last time he ever cut our grass was the best.  Ken said he cut all kinds of crop circles in the front yard and they told him to leave them there but he didn't.  He thought I'd get pissed.  I wish I saw them, that must have looked hillarious.  Then he carved the bush out front in the shape of a heart but we all thought it was an ass crack.  He would be like, "It's a HEART, don't you see it?"  It was so funny how he defended his heart from us making fun of it.  God I miss him so much. 

I had a 1985 Buick LaSabre that we referred to as "The Buick".  I had this car years  before my divorce in 2001 until years after I moved to Philly with Marion.  When Pat moved back in with me, we were living on Algard St.  He was going to Lincoln High in Philly and his younger brother Justin was in Diston school right around the corner from our house.  Little did I know until just before Patrick passed away that the 2 of them would take my car to school everyday for a while.  The were so slick they would park it in the same spot so I wouldn't catch them.  ! day they told me that the spot was gone when they came home and were shittin' bricks 'cause they thought we would catch them but neither I nor Mare even noticed it wasn't in the same spot.  They held that between themselves for like 5 years until they told us.  What could we do but laugh our asses off. 

   The 1st time i got in a car with pat it was the lazer or as we found out later on a trip to the junkyard "kiddy killer" i thought to myself "how bad could this b he just got his L's"nd as fast as i could think that we were gone,speed climing faster then i could say slow down until we got to oohh about 115.At that point of my life the fastest ive gona in a car but shortly after that day we def went faster.we could honestly beat the school bus home even when it left 10 min b4 us lol.i look back nd realize that even tho i hated being in the passager seat with him driven thers no one i trusted more with my life then him.He might have been a crazy driver but the best one i know,Well becides the time we did 360s in front of the police station on pemberton/brownsmills road cause we jus had to beat the red light i swear i was so mad at him that day i didnt buy him breakfast like i normaly did when we got to wawa.                                                                                    People see driven as something they have to do we saw it as something to do for fun probly why he got so many tickits cause he could drive all day like it was nothing.reminds me of the 1st time we got pulld over for speed ofcourse on deephallow by a ranger. all he said to pat was u think this is ur own personal raceway, i was laughing cause i always said keep speedn nd ur gona get caught nd it happend. but back to the storie pat answerd the ranger by sayn well i do live around the corner.lol such a hi answer. luckly for him he workd with tarry nd let us off even tho we laughd the whole time lol.Miss my speedracer 

I still remember the 1st time Patrick sat on Santa Claus' lap.  He didn't want anything to do with sitting on know strange guy's lap when he was only 10 months old so his 1st Christmas was a no go.  The following Christmas wasn't much different.  It was his 3rd Christmas and he was almost 3 yrs old now and he had things to ask for.  He was talking all this smack about the toys he wanted as Katie and Mike took their turns talking to the Big Guy.  When his turn came he started hesitating.  I brought him up and placed him on Santa's lap and when Santa asked if he was a good boy he nodded yes.  So Santa said "What would you like me to bring you for Christmas this year?"  In the fashion only Patrick could do he responded "A BOWL OF SOUP!"  We all just busted up laughing, Us, Santa, Elves and others getting their pictures done.  It was just classic Patrick as know one can ever copy.  Things just rolled off his tongue that were out of this world funny.  He truly is and always will be 1 of a kind.

i miss you so much i remember the first time i went to see one of your hockey games you were the best  kid out their on that ice we had such fun i think i missed one game cause i was so sick i could not get out of bed but when you and dad came home i had to know all the details and of course after each game we had to  go to taco bell miss and love you son and yes we put a plate out for you for Thanksgiving  

I remember one Halloween a long time ago.  Patrick was in 1st or 2nd grade and we were living in Yardville.  This was a huge neighborhood and we trick or treated for hours and hours.  At the end of the night when we got home Katie's bag was loaded with candy.  Well, Pat's was only about a quarter full.  I thought he must have been sneaking it as we were walking but that was a lot of candy.  He was so upset and crying "I didn't eat it Dad, I don't know what happened to it!"  After we emptied his bag I noticed he had a hole in the corner of the bag and figured it probably fell out as we were walking.  He was flipping out as only Patrick could do.  I felt so bad but it was also so damn funny because that would only happen to Pat.  Sure as hell the next day walking to school there is this trail of candy all the way down the street.

I came across the funniest videos of us on my computer the other day Patrick. i wish my computer wasnt such a piece of shit cause i would upload them for everyone to see ! We were at jenns house for christmas , me you larissa jen tony dave & ms laur.  I got my chirstmas money so the first thing we bought was a bottle of Cherry three olives & RED BULL ahahaha We had a blast that night doing next to nothingg lol but we always had fun together , no matter what it was or where we were at. but anyways in the video were in jens room and you wanted me to take the video so you could see what you looked like that you had your black phillies hat on that made you look like a dogg & a black tee shirt and light blue jeans, the video was stupid and made n0o0o sense cause all we were doing was talking about how i lost 75$ that night and how i thought i was fattt & you said in the video " its cause your wearing strpies and stripes make you look fatt" ahaha i gotta laugh outta that. You always had me laughing , thats the one thing i loved about you. No matter what mood i was in when i was around you i was happy & thats what you always loved about me, I was just a happy person & whenever i wass ssad you would pick me right back up again. You were the bestfriend a girl could ask for & i thank you everyday for becoming a part of my life. You changed me for the better and made me inot a beautiful , friendly person. You made me realize my worth & whenever i did something bad or wrong you were right there to call me on my shit. I miss you everyday Patrick, every single day your not here with us. I will hold onto the memories we've had together forever, nothing will ever replace them. Theres soooo many more funnny times i could say but i wont cause it'll just take waaay to long lol But i promise buddy im doing my best to get everyone threw this. Your family has become a family to me. I love you babe. Always & forever.

 haha..i was just thinking about some of adventurous. nd how over the summer we were up to no good. we drove to the park nd yes we ended up smoking. half hr later we were our usual stupid selves laughin at everything and anything. We started walkin bak to the car but we started laughin so hard we just sat down nd couldn't get bak up. So you (pat)  picked me up nd carried me to the car but wen we got there we realized how bad it looked that the driver (me) couldn't even walk bak to the car. Lmao so we just sat bak down nd continued to laugh. I miss being myself with you Pat.