ForeverMissed
Tributes
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
Some beautiful words from some Deming friends:

Janet Woolsey
I am so sorry to hear this. She was ahead of her time as far as advertising in Deming. I think everyone knew who she was. My condolences.

Jo Lynn Carlton Kinman
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One of the sweetest ladies I ever knew.

Pam Frosch Riddle
So sorry to hear about your mom! She was loved by so many. She was so lucky to have you and Lee by her side until the very end. Cherish the memories you have of her! Prayers for you

Billie Smith
Breaks my heart Shaun! Loved Patty!

Jim Reedy
Such a wonderful woman, many many great memories.

Janice Gray
I’m so sorry for your loss. Everyone that knew Patty loved her. She always had a smile.

James Brdecko
My condolences Shaun, she was a wonderful woman
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
Some beautiful words from some Ft Sumner friends:
Adie Achen
I am so sorry I grew up in Ft Sumner with Patty. We were good friends and visited with her in Deming and here in Las Cruces. I will truly miss her.

Jerry Willis
Sorry to hear about Patty! Her parents and their girls helped a multitude of children in Ft. Sumner learn to swim. She was always so sweet and patient with us at the pool. All the boys had crushes on the Bain girls. Prayers for her family!

Gerald Drake
One of my all time favorite families in Ft. Sumner. The Bain Girls, had so much fun with the family. Dreaded going to their house and facing Kenneth when going out on a date with one of the girls. God be with the family.

Mona Howe Pomeroy
Our deepest sympathy and prayers to you and all the family. I grew up in Fort Sumner and after WWII when the pool reopened Kenneth taught me to swim. I think he and Glenda taught every kid in Fort Sumner how to swim! My little brother and I spent lots of happy time at that pool. The Bain girls were excellent swimmers and helped out there so much. After reading the things from the family it sounds like Patty grew into a remarkable woman who will be greatly missed.

Scott Stevenson
My sincere condolences to the family! Patty was a vibrant, smart, and athletic lady that lived life to the fullest! She will be forever missed by all of us that were privileged to have known her throughout the years. ( And they didn't call Kenneth "the old bear" for no reason!

Marilee Koontz
Our thoughts and prayers are with your family. I always looked up to Patty, as being the most beautiful girl I aspired to be like, as a child growing up in Fort Sumner. ❤️

Dolores Gallegos Gonzales
I am so sorry for your loss . I thoughg Patty was so pretty in school. I see she grew up to be a beautiful lady! The Bain girls & their mom were all so pretty. Prayers for the family. RIP , Patty.

Jim Burke
Where does a person start Shaun except to say how very sorry I am for the loss you are going through. So much of my youth revolved around the Bain house, the swimming pool. I learned to swim, dive, and dance from the Bain girls and how to be social. The last time I saw your mother was in Sedona, she talked about how she and Steve were so looking forward to retirement and how proud they were for the woman you had become. Patty will be missed by all who had the pleasure of knowing her. God bless you and your family and know we all grieve with you.

LeaAnn Fikany Curry
Shaun, I am so very sorry so hear about your mom. She was a wonderful lady! I have many great memories of you and your family. Keeping you in my prayers.
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
from a family friend:
Ronna McCoy Mares
Shaun my friend. I'm so very heart broken over the loss of your momma. The first time I met her I thought she was the most beautiful woman I ever met, I was in awe that she was your mom. Prayers for you and your family.
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
From an old high school friend:
James Herring
I am very saddened by Patty's passing. I remember her from high school where she was a cheerleader and active in so many things. She had so many friends and was both beautiful and intelligent. You and a lot of other people will miss her.
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
from a family friend;
Dave Lindberg
Shaun, so sorry for your loss. Your mom was my first celebrity crush. Beautiful inside and out. I will be praying for you and Lee during this time of mourning.
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
from a family friend;
Rickie Young
very sorry. she was a beautiful woman. good heart. i love irises as well. enjoyed playing poker with her. fun God Bless you an yours
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
From Very close friend; Nina Yamaguchi
Please accept our deepest condolences. She was a remarkable person and one of my best friends. I miss her already and can only imagine what you are going through. Sending you love!
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
From very close friends; Ray & JoAnn Dunnaway

Shaun, Lee and family. Although JoAnn and I knew that this message was inevitable it was heart rending to receive your call. Steve and I became friends during our Junior year in High School in about 1952. I met Patty when Steve had the Rectory night club in Albuquerque. Then when Patty and Steve moved to California many years later Steve contacted me and he and Patty and JoAnn and I got together in the Bay Area. The chemistry and affection between the four of us was immediate and we were frequently together. We had Thanksgiving together almost every year from the time they moved to San Jose until they moved to Redding. I was consulting in Silicon Valley for several years so I had the opportunity to have lunch with Steve and Patty a couple of times a week. Over the years the four of us became very close. Patty and JoAnn really hit it off. We were all proud of Patty's accomplishments at Coldwell Banker and constantly amazed at her range of interests. I have a collage of 20 pictures of the four of us together hanging on the wall in my office that Steve assembled and gave us as a gift one year. We loved the times Patty came to visit us in Texas during the last couple of years. She is missed. Ray JoAnn Dunaway
This tribute was added by Beccie Small on September 26, 2020
I told my mom and bob yesterday of this wonderful woman's passing and they send their condolences and love. She will forever hold special places in our hearts as she helped each of us at one time or another. She was always so gentile and caring. Though she was out in the prairie the last few years and away from us, she will definitely be missed.
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
post from Best Friend, Pat Green:
Patty was always sending words of encouragement. This is something she sent me 20-30 years ago. I have had it hanging somewhere in my house ever since:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, Champagne in one hand - strawberries & chocolate in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming WOO HOO - WHAT A RIDE!"

Well friend..... WOO HOO - WHAT A RIDE indeed!!
This tribute was added by Shaun Gardner on September 26, 2020
FROM BEST FRIEND, PAT GREEN:
We were best friends for over 50 years! 1st met at the Rio Membres Country Club in Deming NM in the early 70's! After that, it didn't matter where we lived, close or far, we stayed in close contact and took every opportunity possible to be together. We were blessed with having 2 husbands that were also best of friends and that made for some amazing trips and experiences together for most of our lives. We traveled to Keno Bay, Mexico City, New Orleans, Maine and Las Vegas. Patty brought out the best in all of us and even convinced me that riding motorcycles through the streets of Mexico was not only smart but fun! We could talk for hours and discussed some very important, worldly topics while enjoying (small) amounts of beer, wine and whiskey! If only I could share all the beauty and fun we shared over the years, but it is impossible to sum up what my heart wants to say. 

We sold real estate together in Deming NM and Redding Ca. She helped me paint 2 houses and we spent countless hours working on the Deming Duck Races together. For years we had a lot of fun being silly, but she also worked harder than anyone I knew.

Patty was the most "outrageously happy", optimistic person I've ever known. She never let the world get her down and anyone around her had no choice but to feel better simply from her smile, laughter and words of encouragement. She inspired me, my family (especially my grandsons) to be better people, to improve, grow always and to live life to the fullest everyday, no matter what obstacles we face.

We were not "in love" but we loved each other dearly. We saved each other during the lowest times in our lives. We survived losing our husbands because we had each other. We survived family tragedies because we had each other. We survived new loves and losses because we had each other. We LIVED, LOVED, LAUGHED AND ENJOYED OUR LIVES TO THE FULLEST, because we had each other.  I will survive this because Patty insisted I do... but for now, my heart breaks because my dearest friend in the whole world is gone (but never forgotten), even now, we have each other!
This tribute was added by Beccie Small on September 25, 2020
Patty is such an important person from my past being my 1st caregiver. She always had my well-being in mind, making sure I was taken care of, even when she had huge personal challenges to deal with. I will always picture her out there roughing it as it made her seem 10 years younger! My condolences to her whole family as she will truly be missed. <3
This tribute was added by Javier Pacheco on September 24, 2020
My great grandmother was the best great grandmother I could have ever asked for. She was great at everything whether it be cooking dinner for the family, teaching us how to golf, or teaching us about wine. Growing up with her was a great time in my life, she would always make sure I was safe and happy, even if that meant us going to circle k and satisfying our sweet tooth. I will always remember the trip to Florida, just the two of us. It was an experience like no other, we were just two people living la vida loca with the Miami locals. It seems like every time I would see her she would always have a different story to tell, every story more interesting than the last. She was a great woman to learn from and I could definitely say she is one of the people who has molded me into the person I am today, and I am truly blessed to say that. Even though she passed before I can start my military career, I know she is looking down on me and protecting me from all enemies, foreign and domestic. I know she wouldn’t have wanted to see me with my bald head anyways since she likes me better with long hair. I will truly miss her and her great smile, I love you forever grandmother.

This tribute was added by Spencer Roberts on September 6, 2020
Grandmother Patty was always so kind and loving to me. From the first time I met her she instantly gave me a hug and made me feel part of the family. Though I only knew her a short 7 years, I feel as if she has always been my grandmother. She always surprised me with what she had the ability to do at her age. She was elegant yet rugged and always had a way of pulling out a winning yahtzee game! She will be greatly be missed.
This tribute was added by Camilo Arango on September 5, 2020
Patty,
human life is ephemeral.
a short time to enjoy as we rotate around the sun,
yet the imprint we leave on each other is eternal,
and we find our soul brothers and sisters along our human existences. You my dear, left deep and very profound imprints in me and everyone you met, and everyone that met you.
you exemplified the definition of a life worth living. A true and brilliant shining star!
You showed us all by example how to truly rise to each and every occasion with grace, wit, humor and tenacity.
I was and am very impressed by you, by your charm and love. so blessed to have had you as a part of my life for a decade.
I love you Patty, and I feel your love, still.
I am so very lucky to be married to Easton, who is a reflection of you in so many ways, some of your best is in her, and some of Easton's best is because of you. Her beauty, inside and out. Her genius and tenacity. You were not just her grandmother, but also her mom, her friend, her inspiration, and in many ways my inspiration as well.
I was lucky to share some of my writings and poetry with you, and you were always inquisitive and eloquent with your response.
THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!!
We miss you
we love you Always
and we really appreciate your visits as a bluejay, now with Steve, our beautiful angels singing and dancing in the sunshine and rain.

con muchísimo amor
camilo
  
This tribute was added by Janice Kelton on September 5, 2020
Patty is my favorite cousin! I mostly got to know her in the late 60’s and early 70’s. My sister and I used to babysit sweet Shaun when Patty was first dating Steve Marlow in Albuquerque. I loved listening to her “The Mamas and the Papas” album. I remember a Thanksgiving we shared with the Donnell’s, the Bain’s and the Earnhardt’s when I was about14 (so Patty was around 25). My mother (also Patsy Inez) and Glenda loved playing blackjack in those days and the kids were always included - so much fun and food! Anyway after the turkey did it’s magic a lot of people took naps. I remember looking at Patty as she slept and she had this beautiful smile on her face (while she was sleeping - who does this? My mouth is always wide open. Lol). Anyway I remember thinking this is a person whose soul is as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside.
     And then at Glenda’s memorial I remember her still being that sweet, thoughtful person she had always been. We all went to “Fred’s” that night in Ft. Summer and had green Chile enchiladas.  She was an amazing person and she will be missed!
This tribute was added by Totsie Slover on September 5, 2020
Oh Patty, I will always remember getting to know you and Pat and Gini in the 80's and all the fun we had together. You were such an inspiration when I got into real estate! You went with me when I presented my first offer. And we got it accepted and closed! Your absolutely positive attitude about life was pretty amazing. Everything was always going to be good. You had more determination than anyone I will ever know.

The few days that Pat and I stayed with you in Sedona saved my life. Howard was diagnosed with brain cancer just a few weeks after we got home and the energy I got from the visit gave me the strength to survive the next few weeks! I couldn't have done it other wise. Thank you.

It was wonderful having you for a friend over the years. Thank you. Love you.

Totsie
This tribute was added by Cindy Seff on September 4, 2020
Ms Patty I probably will be the one that has known you the least but feel like I have known you forever because that’s the way you make people feel. I am honored to have shared my home with you to be part of our family Thanksgiving. I’m honored that you have left me a a forever forward lifelong friend in your beautiful daughter and son in law. You will be missed on our mountain but always remembered. I will for sure smile and point out your frogs as I stumble across them down the road! ❤️ I will remember you as I sip my wine and take an extra sip for you and smile knowing how much you loved life and your wine!!!!! Rest In Peace my friend till we all meet up on the other side ! I
This tribute was added by Pat Hathcock on September 4, 2020
I knew Patty since maybe 1952; I always thought her exactly as a girl should be – smart, funny, pretty, good-natured, and a dead-game sport. Odd but vivid memory: we would chunk rocks at yellowjacket nests, and then when the wasps came swarming out looking for revenge, we would hide under a big old chunk of discarded carpet, laughing like crazy, And that's the kind of a girl she was. It breaks my heart that she's gone. I'll probably never find another companion who'll join me to knock down wasp nests. She was a splendid girl.
This tribute was added by Mary Gay Hall McClain on September 4, 2020
Some of my earliest memories we're at the Bain pool. Kenneth telling me to sink or swim. Patty helping me to swim like a fish instead of dog paddling. Watching her and all the other girls swoon over Davy. He was my yu ky big brother, why would anyone swoon over him. Seeing each other at the Donnells in Santa Fe and knowing that if I worked hard ay it, I might grow ip to be as beautiful and nice as Patty, Jane, Kay, and the other big girls. I think of them all with great joy and very fond memories.
This tribute was added by Lee Gardner on September 3, 2020
From your son-in-law...
I was 20 yrs old, it was Friday the 13th and i met your daughter Shaun, it was the luckiest day of my life! Then I met you, you were 34 yrs old, younger than my daughters are now.. Now our grandson, your great grandson just turned 20! After all these years, over 41 years, we have never had a fight, disagreement or even a mild argument. Well, as long as you don't count our heated discussions over the benefits of celery or sour cream!

I have always thought of you as a beautiful women inside and out. And have given you credit for how beautiful my wife and our daughters are. I can't tell you how grateful i am that your looks and amazing character shines through them to this day. Of course everything everyone says about you is so true, but for me, one of my favorite memories of you is the story you told me, that when you were a "dodge girl" and you got to drive the brand new 1970 purple convertible challenger with the "big" engine (you can't remember what size engine, but i forgive you on that) and you were driving through the streets of Albuquerque and a policeman pulled you over. You assumed it was for speeding, but when he walked up to you, he said, "i just wanted to see this amazing new car".. But, I have always thought it was really because he just wanted to see the beautiful young woman driving the hot car!!

I don't know how to shorten 41 years of our relationship into a tribute you truly deserve. So, I have come up with the top 10 things that I want to mention:

1) I remember when you and Steve moved to San Jose and asked me to drive the moving truck. I later learned it had no power steering & no AC. I didn't mind as this would be the 1st time this ole country boy went to the big cities of Calif. Loading the furniture was nothing, it was the 20 tons of clothes that took up 3/4's of the 2 ton truck that was so impressive. I followed you through LA.. then ran out of gas, coasted up the ramp and miraculously made it to the gas station. (this was before cell phones and after Calif changed to the new fangled weird gas pumps).. Somehow, I was blessed with a young, tanned, beautiful, dressed like "daisy duke" car attendant who was happy to pump my gas for me. As I watched her work, I was thinking.. I may never be found and have to live here the rest of my life. But- Just about that time, you & Shaun found me-dang it.. I mean Thank God! ...Then we headed up the 101 and I almost added a bicyclist as a permanent addition to the grill. Thank God I work out, cause it took every muscle to steer away from him, into the dirt and kept control of the truck. Unfortunately, when we got to your new home all your clothes had shifted and wedged the back door, it took hours to open it.... Then, 20 years later, you moved back to join us in Sedona and I was so happy to see that you brought all the clothes back and more! Then, 8 years later, we moved all those clothes and more here to Burro Ridge. I look at your closet now and feel so proud, I get to move them all again!

2) The cooking... I don't know where to begin. You and Shaun were always cooking something amazing for us to eat. We never suffered out here even though off grid and not the easiest way to cook. You always wanted to try new things and most of the time (lol) they were fantastic. The pasole, the sopapillas, enchaladas, the Chinese combos and so much more. You never once took offense when I said, this is "slop" and knew that I was always teasing. You would tell me that I can start cooking anytime I wanted.. to which I said " if I did, you would never want to eat anything else"... I'm so glad we could always rib each other this way!

3) Your food concoctions. I will never forget the amazing piles of unrelated food items you would put together. Mayo, butter, grease, cheese, bacon bits, celery, yogurt, green beans and more, in a bowl with fried hamburger... or something similar.. I could watch you build for hours to get this concoction.. and then would tease you about what wine goes best with that meal... you would smile and say BOTH!!

4) Party prep. over the years we threw some pretty amazing parties and/or weddings. You, along with Shaun, Brandy &/or Easton (and friends) put together unbelievable amounts of high quality food for an amazing feast. Especially out here at Burro Ridge, I never thanked you enough for all the work. Many times, Shaun and I left you here with a horrible mess to clean up before, during and after the parties. You never complained, just always chipped in and did a ton of work. Thank you.

5) Building your "little" house. What a job that was, but so well worth it. You tried your hardest to keep up with me and do whatever needed to be done. You always joked that I built the house by myself with 1 helper (you and shaun), but i hope you know that we couldn't have done it without you. Even when you tried to kill me by making me use the roofers harness and then I fell off the roof for the 1st time in my life. I am so glad we got your "little" house done in time for you to enjoy it. Complete with your 3 double french doors and walk around deck. I have never been so proud as to know, I was a part in making your dreams come true. I saw the love and pride you had in your "little" house every day and it makes me very proud to have been able to do that for you. This house is an absolute tribute to you and who you are.

6) I know that you love my paintings, you have always bragged about them, it made me feel very good. When the weather was bad and I couldn't paint outside, you insisted I come in the house and you would watch me paint for hours. You seemed genuinely entertained and said it made you feel like you were part of the painting. Even though your "little" house was packed with paintings, you wanted to display every one of them!! thank you for all your support!

7) Driving through all the storms over the years. You always told me that with me driving you knew you were safe.. but I knew you were still scared. I remember you saying "thank God, you are driving and not me". We had some big adventures trying to get out of Burro Ridge a couple of times. You would laugh when i would say "hold on, I'm floorin it and not stoppin til we get to the other side".. we always made it!!

8) Your spectacular Iris's... You were so excited when i designed your iris beds around your "little" house, that you couldn't wait to get them all planted. We planted all you had and then drove out to a special place and dug up some old old iris's that a pioneer family must have planted YEARS ago. You and Shaun carried 2 huge bags of those iris's for over 1 mile back to the truck. I told you they probably wouldn't bloom cause they were so old. But to our amazement they bloomed the very 1st year. You loved your iris's, they were absolutely beautiful every year. I will always think of you when I see these iris's bloom!

9) You loved walking around Burro Ridge but because of the terrain, it wasn't the easiest. So, I decided to build you a trail system to be able to walk safely around the whole area. You were so excited and for years enjoyed walking a different trail each day. You would tell me in such detail all the sites you saw on your daily trail walks and it made me so proud that I did that for you. Over 3 miles of trails for you to enjoy. It broke my heart that for the last year, you just couldn't find the energy to do the trails any more. But would always ask us what we saw and which trail did we take so that you could enjoy them still through us! I will always think of you every time we walk the trail and you will be with me every step of the way!

10) Just in case you are worrying about the Poker I.O.U. for my losings. I will not lose it and promise to pay you next time we are together (with interest of course). You were ruthless, especially after a little wine and some competitive encouragement! I know you certainly enjoyed raking my pile of chips to your side of the table! Your Uncle "Bill" would be proud of his niece!!

This was the hardest top 10 to write as there are so many more amazing life stories to tell. You were an amazing mother in law and friend. We lived together in a way that most people could never do and it was all good. We loved, laughed, teased each other, played, worked and ate like kings together. We laughed during good times, cried during bad times and watched the world turn in a dark way.. but still found time to enjoy Burro Ridge. You are a huge part of this amazing place and in my heart. I will miss you tremendously. Love you
This tribute was added by Easton Arango on August 31, 2020
To my Dear Grandmother Patty ~ with infinite love, your granddaughter, Easton

In the midst of a sleepless night
I lie awake thinking of you
Almost as if I’m lying by your side
I feel your warmth and soft slumber
I sense - you are a part of me

I remember all the moments
That you ignited my spirit
With your dynamic presence
Your golden touch
I feel - you are a part of me

Your beauty always shines
Drawing attention from all
But it’s your caring touch
That illuminates the real you
I see - you are a part of me

You live in the moment
Taking in the wind and rain
As if it’s your last touch
Your last taste of the wet dirt
I taste - you are a part of me

I giggle in the midst of our play
Games galore, mysteries and more
The stories you told and wrote
An imagination without bounds
I hear - you are a part of me

The depths of your soul are rich
Filled with dreams of the beyond
Knowing deep down that
This is not the only life
I know - you are a part of me

And now more than ever
I know I’m going to miss you
More than you can imagine
So I embrace every moment
I’ll always remember - you are a part of me

I promise to always make you proud
Because I love you to the moon
I know you will always be with me
Because – you are a part of me!
Because – you are a part of me!

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