At the end of an inconsequential work day, December 3rd, 2013, I said "See you tomorrow, Pete" to the guy that I spent every work day with, at arm’s length, for several years. The rest of the night was so completely inconsequential that I don't remember one single second of it to this day.

Next morning, I answered a 6 A.M. ringing telephone. I knew a call that early wasn't going to be good. It was Marc Tomiselli on the other end. "Pete Vargas died."

I was wishing it was a prank but knew better. I asked how it happened and Marc said that he had a heart attack the night before. Seriously? Pete changed his life around! Worked out, ate sensibly and was a member of a dragon boat team. But none of it meant a thing. For Pete, there would be no reprieve. No three strikes. No bypass surgery. No tough diagnosis and long, sad goodbyes....just gone from the radar. If I was ten years old, I’d be shouting “No fair.”

Pete had many more friends than anyone I know and I'm sure they feel the same as I do.  A loyal friend a really nice guy, and one of life's unforgettable characters.  But above all, he was the ultimate family guy. With admirable devotion, he held up his family on his broad shoulders like Atlas. His wife, kids, grandkids and aging parents, all. He was the glue that held it all together.  The maestro.  How the hell are they doing it without him?

This kind of abrupt separation is always a call to re-evaluate the quality of our input in relationships. Unfortunately we have too many of these wakeup calls and never really wake up.

Personally, I wish that I'd laughed it up a few more times with Pete. Maybe gone on that fishing trip we were always talking about that was always ‘next spring’. What was stopping me? Work? We had plenty of vacation time. House needed paint? That house is still there; my friend is gone forever. I'm hearing crickets. It's too late now. And that's that.

I hope he was as fond of me as I was of him.

I hope his wife and family have found comfort.