This section includes the eulogies that we’re given at Primula’s funeral. (Videos of the eulogies have been posted in the “Gallery” section of this website, under “Videos”).

If you would like to place a tribute for Primula, please do soin the “About” section.

When a Loved One Goes Home

Once they saw through a glass darkly, now they see their risen Lord.

Once they fought through tests and trials, now they stand in faith's reward.

Once they had but partial knowledge, now they know as they are known.

Once they walked a pilgrim's journey, now their feet are safely home.

'-Roy Lessin '

A Tribute to my friend Primula

Friday the 15th of June the daily reading said ' We are citizens of Heaven' Phil 3:20

It said God created us for Heaven and nothing in life will fully satisfy that longing.....and that is why we try to make Heaven down here. You could see this with Primula, her garden was always flourishing, her home beautiful and colourful, her heart was open, generous and so hospitable.

I'm going to miss hearing, ' Now Kath, what are we going to do about.....? Lately my grey hair.

How close is a friend who could tell me truths about myself without causing offence....' Kath you know you are very opinionated ' !

We in our family loved this about her and Roy and Primula were highly valued and treasured in our home.

So my friend, you leave a huge hole in our hearts, but we release you to enjoy Heaven, to walk around God's garden, to soak up His sunshine and warmth and as the reading for that day concluded....

' And as your redeemed ones leave to go to Heaven, your longing to join them will increase.'

To this we can say YES AND AME

As the oldest grandchildren, Sarah and I are honored to talk about our amazing Nan.  Along with our cousin Peter, we are speaking on behalf of all the grandkids.  We each had a very special relationship with Nan and shared many wonderful experiences with her.  She has been a big part of all of our lives and we have all learnt a lot from her.  As such we wanted to share four valuable lessons that we can thank Nan for! 

I saw Nan only a few weeks ago, when she came to visit us in Queensland. I have to apologise to you all in advance. I think she gave me the best of what was left. Once again, she reminded me of how 'healthy' I looked. We joked about how she should wear her headscarf to get the most sympathy and special treatment on airplane on the wayhome. We sat close on the couch and I held her soft, golden hands one last time. My dear, dear Nanny. We would all know the parable of the talents. You know, I don't know what talents Nan would have been gifted with at birth. I don't know if she would have had a gift for science or math. I don't know if literature was her thing. I don't know if she had a knack for the creative. Here's what I do know though. Whatever natural talents she may not have had, she made up for in simply pulling through. I don't know if she was born with the talent of looking after a boy with Down Syndrome in the 1950s. I don't know if she had the talent of being able to usher him to build his capacities. I don't know if she had the talent of managing a house when her very industrial and upwardly mobile husband was travelling for work. I don't know if she had the natural talent of packing up and moving all the way Down Under, away from all she knew. I don't know if she had the natural gift for hospitality. But I can tell you this: if she wasn't born with them, she certainly developed those talents to a mastery level. I'm pretty sure that she will be greeted in the heavens with a 'Well done, good and faithful servant. I gave you a flower, and you created a beautiful garden'. I don't think Nan was ever the type to lead from the front. I don't think you could say she was the life of the party or the one that jollied the group along. She was, however, the one that would make sure everyone had a cup of tea before they even realised they needed one. She was the one that, if you were coming for dinner, she'd planned it a week in advance. The table would have been set by 2pm. Anything that could be done before hand was done, so she could give her best to her guests. So she could give her best to you. I don't think she needed much to feel loved. A garden of pretty flowers. A warm spot to sit and a hot cup of tea. One-on-one conversation where she could ask you a question, and ask another before you could sufficiently answer. Someone to ask questions of her. Nan was the one that looked out for the residents in her village. She was a voice to many voiceless people with disabilities, striving to give them all dignity, capability and care. She was a passionate supporter of Israel and a rock-solid believer in the Risen Lord. She was the heart of her home and kept it beating with kindness, hospitality and warmth. She brought a bit of colour everywhere she went. I know she said it toeveryone, but I'll let you in on a secret. I was actually her absolute number one favourite. If you were Nan's child, grandchild or great grandchild, I know that you too were her absolute 100% favourite, too. I'll forever miss you Nanny.

My beautiful Mum , Primula, was a vibrant and colourful lady.

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

You are all here because you knew my Mum! Everybody knew she was ‘colourful’ and sometimes just a bit quirky – but it is my intention here today to let you know that she was much, much more than that!!

She was a woman of strength, substance and a very big heart!

Those who knew her well will think it strange that I might use a sporting analogy to describe Mum, her being a person with little interest in any sport …

But Mum was indeed a lot like a bowling ball!!

If you have ever had a go at lawn bowls you will understand what I am saying here – because the thing with a bowling ball is that it has an inbuilt bias. A leaning.  It can’t help it – it is made to swerve off the straight and off in another direction. Mum had a bias – and it came from the very core of her being. It was a bias which caused her to veer at every possible opportunity toward person who was either disabled, handicapped, vulnerable or needy. It was a bias which gave her a yearning to be a part, however small, of their lives.  It was a bias that outworked itself in not only emotion, but also in action!

Whether or not it started with the birth of ‘my Richy’ I cannot say, I am told that long before that she had a kindness towards the less competent and those on the edge of society because of their needs.  But there is no doubt that 1964, the year in which ‘my Richy’ was born, changed her life and ours, forever.

Throughout the late 1960’s, my young life in England, I well recall Mum (and Dad) being activists in establishing various local organizations which both connected the families of other disabled children and led a challenge to the local authorities to provide for the needs and education of these special members of our society, which back in those days were almost non-existent in our area. Our home was abuzz with activity and purpose, this was a young woman, a mum, with a passion to see the best possible outcomes for not only her beautiful and precious son – but all those in that same situation.

(For a very interesting conversation, you may wish to have a chat to my Dad and ask him about Mum’s work in England in those early years.)

The story continues as we moved to Australia in 1971, and Mum got a job.  She became a Personal Carer in a hospital which was then known as “Weemala – Home for the Incurables”.  There Mum blossomed, and would come home from work fulfilled and energized by the difference she was able to make in the lives of severely disabled people. She cleaned them, changed them, fed them and loved them. She even brought some of them home and Dad was sent to pick them up and drive the bus home! She’d invite them home for lunch.  And then – we were taking them, in the bus, to church. They loved it, we grew to love it (I think) and Mum was in her element.

I can remember visiting Weemala on one occasion. Mum had coached me that when you speak to these patients you must always reach out and touch them – a practice she never failed to implement. She’d say,

“Most of these people are never touched except by staff who are performing a duty. You must always touch these people when you speak to them!” It spoke to them of LOVE.

I was about 15 years old.

What I saw that day was so confronting – not only their bodies broken through accident, disease, brain damage or genetic disorder, bodies contorted, spasming arms, legs, bodies – but also their mouth and their dribbles and everything. Such was the impact of these sights, sounds and smells that I, I am sorry to tell you, was completely overwhelmed and overcome and dropped in a faint onto the nearest bed –

At which dear old Les, bespectacled, twisted in body but not in mind, roared with laughter. Why are you laughing? Mum said.

“I’ve never had a girl in my bed before!” Ha ha!!

When Mum was in her 50’s she was confronted by the “Richmond Report” which sought to bring ‘normality’ to the lives of the disabled. Some carers saw this as an opportunity to introduce them to the “pub and club” scene of that day. Mum said,

   “Right! It’s also normal for young people to attend a Christian Fellowship group!”.

So it was that she initiated the formation of such a fellowship which was called the Agape Fellowship for the Disabled ( ‘agape is a Greek word meaning unconditional love’– and over time up to 80 members with varying degrees of disability, would attend this monthly Christian Fellowship, sometimes for an outing, but usually for an evening with entertainment, sharing, singing, music, dancing, a simple gospel message, and of course, a plate of supper! This fellowship ran for 19 years, with a team of faithful and capable workers supporting the fellowship. And Mum, though never at the forefront, was a dedicated behind the scenes manager – committed to providing a quality evening of fun and connection to those who so often miss out. At Agape Fellowship, no one missed out, because Mum made sure of it! This was her vision. This was her work. This was a place her bias had led her.

Life continued on the same trajectory and I could tell you countless tales (my Dad could tell you many, many more), tales which illustrate mums compassion for others.

Eg: How on our trip to Africa together Mum wasn’t half as interested in the nice ladies as she was in our dear Kenyan bus driver who had recently lost his much loved wife.

Of attending the Jerusalem March, in Israel, where we had gifts from Australia to give to the local children who lined the streets of Jerusalem. They reached out their hands as they clapped the passing parade – but Mum held on to her little gift koalas.  She told me she was saving hers for someone special. Her eyes scoured the back of the crowds, she was looking for a ‘little soldier’, or someone in a wheelchair who couldn’t get to the front of the crowds.  This was who would be getting her gifts.

But finally, may I tell you about what happened when we went to India on holidays. One day, according to our itinerary, we were supposed to be visiting a park to see the birds.  But we decided together that we weren’t so excited about seeing the birds, but we wanted to see if there was a home – for special people – somewhere close by.

We enquired at the reception desk and amazingly the manager came out of his office, and said,

“There’s a home nearby that I often visit – I’ll take you if you like!”

“If we like!?!”  “Oh, Yes Please!”

We set off eagerly, way off the road and into the countryside, up a track and finally arrived at a large set of gates with a huge sign,

“The Home for the Lame and Mentally Handicapped”

Up a long, overgrown driveway to a very large, very ugly, very concrete building. There we met 3 lovely nuns, in full habit, who showed us around the house.  I’m not sure what we thought we would see.

We entered a large foyer with many rooms coming out of it.  Each room led to other rooms, each holding beds – though not like beds we have here – and on each bed was an elderly lady.

We entered the first room and there lying on their wire beds were about 5 elderly ladies whose eyes turned to look at the two strange, white, unexpected visitors.

We couldn’t speak their language. We looked at them, they looked at us – I looked at Mum. (What would she do now? I thought to myself)

Suddenly, her face lit up – her arms opened wide and she gently went to each lady, one by one,

“Hello Darling” she said, she sat beside them, held their hands and said,

We’ve come to see you!”

We went to every patient, no matter what condition they were in – she held each hand and kissed each cheek.

Each and every person was greeted, hands were touched.

We went upstairs to see some more patients, these had private rooms and the residents showed us their treasured but meagre possessions. Someone had some music and played something quite upbeat – and not being able to say much – we danced!

We took their hands and as the music played, we danced. They all joined in, we danced, we twirled, we danced and we laughed together. So rich and blessed a time I cannot recall in all of India!

That was MY MUM .. and I am so proud of her.

My 2 minutes!!!!  is over, I close by honouring my Mum for what she taught us; what she gave to others who could never give anything back; and for sharing with all of us her very big heart.

Thank you Mum!

I was very honoured that Primula would ask me to speak at her service, and I know she would like me to share with you how we met and the context of our friendship.

Roy assures me we met at a prayer meeting for Israel at Gretta Anna’s but I don’t recall that. My first remembrance was at a WIZO fund raiser (Women's International Zionist Organisation) I was surprised to meet another gentile, as most of the women there were Jewish. It was some time after that I was told about a Friday night Bible Study meeting in West Pennant Hills to study the Torah (1st 5 books of the Hebrew scriptures that we call the Old Testament) that I discovered it was actually in Primula’s and Roy’s home…It was our mutual love of the Jewish people and a search to discover the Hebrew roots of our faith that cemented our friendship.

After meeting for a year or so, Roy and Prim felt God was asking them to set the Sabbath apart, and that we should celebrated it as the early believers did, over a meal. This was a lot more work for Prim than providing tea and biscuits for supper! But it became for all of us the highlight of our week. Roy and Prim were the Co-ordinators. Roy appointed who would pray, teach the Torah portion, bless the bread and wine etc., and Primula, who would bring what for the meal. Just this last Saturday we gathered for the first time without Prim, it was then we discovered that she actually carried the lion’s share of the work and what’s more, she did it with such ease! In many respects Prim oversaw the flow of the evening but each of us contributed and the dinners were wonderful. We were aware that the fellowship we shared in the Word around that table celebrating the Lords Shabbat brought in the sweetness of His Presence in way we had not experienced before. She and Roy made a wonderful team with their blend of giftings, allowing God to create what was for us all a treasured Shabbat fellowship! Indeed the joy of discovering together the Hebrew roots of our faith and how they gave a deeper understanding and richness to the New Testament revolutionised our individual walks with God.

I learned a lot about Prim from just being in her home. Her beautifully tended garden was full of bright strong colours and her love in particular for every shade of orange and yellow were evident throughout her home. These were so reflective of her lovely sunny nature that embraced people and life.

I remember when she and Roy celebrated their 80th birthdays. I found it hard to relate to this as Primula always seemed so much younger. I believe her secret was that she was open to new ideas and change and she embraced people as people. It did not matter to her if you were 15 or 50 you were a person to her and she was interested in you. She loved her iPad which was a new acquisition only a few years ago and loved to share with us Messianic sites she had found on the internet that interested her – she embraced new ideas.

She was a natural homemaker. Part of loving her family and friends involved creating a home that was warm and welcoming. She loved to cook and she was a good one.From her colourful garden to her beautifully laid table or the eclectic mix of pots at her front door, you were always made so welcome. Prim excelled at hospitality and her home was an extension of this.

The beauty of Prim was her servant heart that cared for people. She was a listener. Over the years at various occasions I heard her make comments like, so and so was very quiet tonight I wonder if they were alright or I think they might have found what was talked about confronting or maybe they looked tired or sad. I would notice her go and sit with that person and minister to them her concern and compassion and love. Conversely, Primula could be forthright, she did not shy away from speaking the truth or if she felt something needed to be said. She was no pushover which added to her lovely character. She was both kind, caring and loving as well as strong, and this was undergirded with stability; she was incredibly stable. Primula was a godly woman.

It was this relationship with her God that allowed her to face cancer with hope. She did not want to focus on her illness but rather on God’s word. If you pressed her to find out how she was, she would often look at Roy and say, “You tell them Roy”, she just did not want to talk about it. Rather she loved it if you gave her a psalm or a promise or even a poem, anything that she could take strength from. Until the end Prim was believing for healing but when it became apparent this was her time to go home, she was able to embrace this with peace.

I want to borrow from Proverbs 31 words that I believe sum up our lovely Primula.

Strength and dignity are her clothing and she smiles at the future. She opens her mouth in wisdom and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the way of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and bless her and her husband also, he praises her saying

Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain but a woman who fears the Lord she shall be praised.

I had the privilege of being there to say ‘good bye’ to her on the day she died. My last words to her were. “I look forward dear one to sharing Shabbat with you again, but this time around the Lord's table in His Kingdom”.

Hello…I’m Helen Kallmier. My husband, Lynton, and I have known Primula (and Roy) for almost 20 years, since meeting at Telopea Church of Christ. I was going to let you in on a secret today, but I’m realising after what has already been said this morning, that this is no secret whatsoever! Primula was a woman of colour! But not quite in the way this phrase is used today! Colour was such an important part of Primula’s life:- In her clothes and all that she wore; In her home and all that she put in it; In her garden with all the plants she chose to grow there. Bright colours and Primula just went together……no wonder Roy said in his email about this service that “those who knew Primula well, would not wear black”. Primula was a friend who was so generous and had such a compassionate heart…she was always interested and concerned about my wellbeing, and that of my family….and of course, anyone else that she knew. Lynton and I grew to know Primula and Roy even more closely after they invited us to be part of the team with them in running Agape Fellowship. This was a group they had set up many years before we knew them, which met on Saturday nights, once a month, to enable adults with all sorts of disabilities to come together for fun and fellowship…..a very special time , which meant such a lot to a great number of people. I believe that the greatest blessing on those nights, on top of everything else, was the love that was shared with all who came. Primula’s heart for these less able people, was so much a part of who she was. She really helped me see clearly, that, no matter what disability, each person was valuable and lovable…and this understanding continues for me today. Lynton and I really enjoyed our nights at Agape, and we still often bump into some of the people who used to come. Without exception, they, or their carers, comment on how much they loved Agape and are sad it no longer exists. On a lighter, very personal note, I feel I must talk about “hair”…another subject very important to Primula. She always wanted her hair to look good (and it did) and she always noticed and commented on mine. It was usually one of the first greetings when we met….and not always did she approve of how mine was looking on that day! I could go on and on, but I will finish , knowing that Primula is now with her Yeshua, whom she loved so very much and I am sure she is delighting in His love. I’m also sure that she is finding that His love for her is even more wonderful than she could ever have imagined!! We love you Primula and will miss you!