Rebecca’s Memorial
I am grateful to be here in quiet, beautiful Topanga. The place Rebecca loved. I’m grateful to be with you, the family and friends who love her. I’m grateful she passed in her home among the mountains.
I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills from whence cometh my help. My help cometh from the Lord who made heaven and earth. Psalm 121
Some of you know the significance of the butterfly and how it has become a connection with Rebecca.
Not many days before her passing Matt, Rebecca, and I were in the main room. I looked out the window and saw a white butterfly among the rosemary, “Oh, there’s a white butterfly in the rosemary! Rebecca burst into tears. She said she had asked God if she was going to be well to let her hear the word, “butterfly.”
Of course, we were thinking of her being healed in her mortal body. But she’s healed! She has the ultimate healing. Several times she dreamed she was running. She runs, she flies, and as Matt said, “She’s dancing, drawing, and designing.”
December 3, I walked with heavy feet to the mailbox. All my thoughts. Noah and Nate so young without their mother. I was thinking to get a word and this word came, “Carousel.” I repeated it so I would be listening for that word. A word that would lead me to something I needed to know.
When I got back to the house, Nate said, “Mimi, do you want to see the park I made on my phone?”
“Sure.’
He began giving me a guided tour “And here’s my carousel.” Wow, the word! It was delightful that there was a Presence to give a word I would hear. But what did it mean?
A few days later Matt told of a dream he had of Rebecca. I took this opportunity to ask him, “Does carousel mean anything to you?”
“No.”
Later that day I was out with Atrick, their dog. She was running up and down the hills and I was throwing a ball to her. I was praying about my family and our country. Suddenly, in my spirit, “What goes round and round?” A carousel! And then I knew.
“Atrick, come!” I ran in the house to click on a song! A song with the words, “Are you tired of spinning round and round?”
Before when I had played this song, there was Evie, the soloist, with her audience, but now there were all these photos of butterflies. The title, “
Give it all, Give it all, Give it all to Jesus.’’
Give Them All to Jesus - Evie Tornquist - YouTube I cried. I was comforted.
Later, when I told Jacinda this story, she said when she had been there previously, she had made a video of Rebecca and Nate going round and round in a carousel. I knew nothing of this. But God did. Rebecca did. I have a picture to give you of Nate and Rebecca. Also, one of my favorite pictures of Rebecca with Noah.
There are more butterfly stories which are on the Memorial Page. I’ll tell one more. When I returned to Topanga in June, Jeff, Matt’s Dad brought me to the bottom of the steep hill going up to their house. Matt came down As we both got in his car, a white butterfly flew in the window, across the car and back out! Rebecca was happy we were together.
Rebecca was remarkably cheerful and patient all those months. Of course, sometimes she cried. She continued to help Nate and Noah with their schoolwork. And go over Matt’s book. She was not a complainer. She would say, “When you get a chance, could you. . .?’ I felt I had to say to her, “Rebecca, don’t hesitate to ask me to do something.”
Several times Rebecca quoted, ‘‘
In everything give thanks.” What? There she was in her wheelchair saying, “
In everything give thanks.” In recent days I’ve thought about this a lot. “
In everything, give thanks.” I’m familiar with that verse. Yes, to give thanks for good things, but everything? The seemingly bad things? I’ve known in my head that that was right. But have I really been putting this into practice? No, I haven’t. I made a list of things I wished were different and pronounced over them, “
In everything give thanks.” Today, especially we need this. We need to guard our minds against negativity. When a person goes to war, they go through boot camp. If one is going to be in the Olympics, there is training—not all of it easy. “
In everything give thanks” is in the armory of the Spirit. Everything in the physical is a shadow of the reality in the Spirit. Many have said this, including Plato.
‘While we look not at the things that are seen but the things that are not seen. The things that are seen are temporal; the things that are not seen are eternal.” (II Corinthians 4:18)
In everything give thanks enables us to see things from another perspective, to see behind the scenes where we can be better guided to know what to do. In guarding against negativity, we should not affirm that which we do not want to continue. It enables us to see The Invisible, to enlist the Invisible Host. Things may not be as they seem.
“
In everything give thanks” is not easy. It takes practice. We can understand something, yet not be proficient in it. A tennis instructor illustrates what to do—you understand, but you don’t immediately become an expert tennis player.
I called Mark Wallace, one of Rebecca’s professors at Swarthmore. We talked for an hour and 16 minutes, and we felt Rebecca heard everything.
[SH1] I was hoping he might have some of Rebecca’s writings. He said “unfortunately they had been renovating his office and he had been throwing everything out.” However, later he emailed, “Absolutely a miracle ; you suggested I look in my office one last time; I was convinced nothing was there but, lo and behold, there it was:”
Surely the angels preserved that particular paper!
He wrote:
I enjoyed Rebecca's Statement of Purpose to Berkeley you posted at the memorial site. I hear the clarity of her distinctive voice in this statement. I can't believe it is 20 plus years old; it sounds like she wrote it yesterday. I don’t understand why she passed, what sense it makes for such a vibrant and visionary young woman to be taken from you and her family and other loved ones and friends. But then I recall the hymn, It is Well With My Soul, whose author penned this haunting song during a terrible time in his own life, and I think perhaps some comfort, if not comprehension, can be found in times of terrible loss
Yes, we identify with what her professor has expressed.
From the end of the earth will I cry unto Thee. When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:2 For where your treasure is, will be your heart also.I
Sometimes sorrow and joy hold hands.
As sorrowful, yet always rejoicing. II Corinthians 8:10 This I believe— All of Rebecca’s hard work, and everybody knows she was a hard worker, her standard of excellence is not for naught. She carries it with her. On The Other Side we begin where we left off. Nothing is wasted. This I believe with all my heart. I am comforted.
People say, ‘It’s not fair.” Not fair.
Our time on earth. All around us are unfair things. The earth is full of seemingly unfair things. We are here to experience life. To make mistakes, to learn, to grow. We need to guard our minds against negativity. How can we be conquerors with no conquest? How can we be overcomers with nothing to overcome? If there is no sadness, how can we know joy? Our life is a vapor. Rebecca’s life was short but even if you live to be as old as I am—82—life is a vapor. When you are my age, you are no stranger to sorrow. My husband passed when we were both 29.
Yes, all of us have experienced seemingly unfair things---how do we respond?
Also, probably most of us have done unfair things to others. I know I have. And to people I love. I want to be forgiven.
This is something else that Rebecca was diligent about. She forgave. She cared about resolving issues in relationships. I remember one letter especially she wrote. How important to forgive and be forgiven—to ask for forgiveness. It’s foundational for earth school. We all have these challenges. It’s foundational for world peace. And we know Someone—the Prince of Peace who said, “
Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.’ `Forgiveness, along with love. When Rebecca was 5 years old, she recited the love chapter, I Corinthians 13 for my cousin, Stefanie’s wedding. It’s a good chapter for us all to memorize. Just a few phrases.
Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not love, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. . . Love suffereth long, and is kind. . . Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things Love never faileth. For now we see through a glass, darkly, but then face to face; now I know in part. . . Rebecca and I told each other our stories. Some of the things we knew about each other’s lives were sketchy. We filled in the details. Near death experience testimonies speak of a life review. In a sense, we had a preview life review.
Many near-death experience books have come into my hands without my initiative. One told of a mother in the spirit world walking along her physical son trying to tell him something. He couldn’t hear anything she was saying. It was a different vibration.
Everything vibrates. Gratitude is the easiest way to raise our vibration. We’re thrown a curve ball, things are not turning out as we want. Throw the devil a curve ball,
In everything,
give thanks. Helen Keller said, “Although the world is full of suffering, it is full of the overcoming of it.” John Lewis was asked about how current protests compare to the ones he was in. He said, “Well, there is one thing that is different.. Singing. They sang.”We must sing. We must sing in the dark. And not be part-time soldiers. Singing only in the sunshine. Just condemning something doesn’t fix it. In fact, it can make it stronger as we focus on what we don’t want instead of what we do want. Covid. In everything give thanks. We need to change the energy, the vibration.
Rebecca had perseverance and character. If Rebecca in her wheelchair could say, “
In everything give thanks, then what about us? Rebecca was reflective. In her writing she challenged landscape architects “to identify for urban dwellers the places to get lost. . .those places that allow for contemplation.”
Rebecca loved nature and beauty. She loved planting things. She spoke of neighborhood gardens and green space and how our actions affect the land and vice versa.
December 27: I took my journal and sat on a tree stump surrounded by sage and the majestic Topanga mountains. I felt so close to Rebecca. I texted my friend, Ed, the son of my friend, Elaine, who has passed on.
People on The Other Side can be close to us because we sit in heavenly places. Ed’s son, David, had been killed in Afghanistan... He texted back:
This is a great revelation you get about heavenly places. I talk to David daily and Elaine. . .and I believe they hear me, both being in that great cloud of witnesses. A warm feeling comes over me.
And hath raised us up together and made us sit together in heavenly places . . . Ephesians 2:6
Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses. . . Hebrews 12
From her Statement of Purpose:
“Modern society and urban living have cast us out of our natural habitat, but we must find our way back to the Garden.”
We must find a way back to the “Garden.” Garden. .capitalized. I once had a stone to put on the ground with this inscription; “I heard Your Voice in the Garden.” There’s an old song,
‘I come to the Garden alone, while the dew is still on the roses. And The Voice I hear, falling on my ear, the Son of God discloses. And He walks with me and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own. . .” Rebecca’s in the Secret Garden. Noah and Nate, your mother is in the Secret Garden. You will find her there in The Secret Place of the Most High.
Secret Garden - Song From A Secret Garden - YouTubeRebecca, we carry you with us until we see your face again.
"As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, And at the last, He will take His stand on the earth. Even after my skin is destroyed, Yet from my flesh I will see God, Whom I, on my part, shall behold for myself, And whom my eyes will see, and not another." [Job 19:25-27] You Raise Me Up
You Raise Me Up So That I Might Stand on Mountains, Andre Rieu André Rieu - You Raise me Up - YouTube When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary
When troubles come and my heart burdened be
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence
Until You come and sit awhile with me.
You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders
You raise me up to more than I can be
Songwriters: Graham Brendan Joseph, Loveland Rolf
