How to best describe Our Saff; thoughtful and caring, liked to create thoughtful, meaningful gifts, that she took great pleasure in sharing. Saff had a quirky interest in frogs, bees, memes, cats, dogs and feeding ducks peas. Her sense of humour was developing, strange but hilarious, her wit was quick and timing perfect for a dig, she was learning how to take it too.
She was naturally good at anything she tried, but cooking was intense!
Saff was unique - Sticking her swear fingers up violently, as a sign of love. Crying with love when she saw dogs and ducklings. Her sense of adventure, wanting to go to new places, try new foods. Her infectious laugh. Zigzag foot dance, dancing in general, head bops, random lyrics, whistling, drumming with her hands. Doodles of paper aeroplanes, willies, frogs, cats.
Her love of succulent plants. She would talk about food and the way it makes you feel, you could almost taste the flavours she described.
Saff would make comments, titles, sayings and pisstakes: “Oi stinky (stinkyyyyyy) smelly. Oh my god I love hiiiiiim. Oh my god that was so scary. Cute. Suck on this DIIck. Lick my balls. The boys. Her wicked digs. Willy.
There were so many funny moments; Going on an icy walk with Kodi and slipping on her butt. Eating loads of the cheese because she likes it and then getting the shits. Re-enacting the Lion King with the cats. The day Saff fell into the fish pond at the public gardens. Losing things that end up being in her pocket, normally her phone. Getting really far in all of the Super Mario levels but walking off a planet before she gets the star.Screaming at her own dismay at 2am every morning because she died in a game with the lads.Hearing Saff at night talking to ‘the boys’ on discord, laughing so hard, full of glee, belly chuckling with explosive screams of delight or dismay, she often said about her poor attempts on new games. She would roll on her chair wheels, pushing from the desk, it sounded like a distance challenge and she’d chat all night.
Birth and early years
It was a Sunday, 6.08am that Saffron was born. It was Halloween, October the 31st 1999.
Mel and Dan (Dan and I) were young 18 and 21, and lived at Mill Hill in Braintree. Saff was the first grandchild and not many of our friends had had babies yet so she had lots of adults around.
She came into the world laughing, that’s how I wrote it on her baby book, when she was born, she made a sound that resembled a faint chuckle, and whether that was right or wrong, she continued to chuckle and giggle which was often commented on, she had a cute, dirty little laugh, it was catching.
Saff was a chilled baby, always smiling and curious of her surroundings and always watching family, reaching out for hugs. She was Easy Peasy, always loved being around others, stuck to a good routine and loved her sleep something that continued into adulthood!
We called her Saffy for years but were under strict instruction that Saff was her title more recently.
Her soft hair took a long time to grow but became the most beautiful, bouncy, blonde curls. She wasn’t particularly girly, we trialled dresses but she was more comfortable in bright clothes that had the freedom to handstand, lay upside down and run freely in. She loved the freedom of our garden, playing in the grass, taking off her shoes and socks, playingon the garden swing and pottering around outside.We often took a rug and spent the day outside playing and reading. She loved the park but mostly having the freedom to explore outside in the wilderness, green places, the river and open spaces to run.
We spent lots of lovely days together with family; Nanny Trousers, Andy, Nanny and Grandad Glasses, uncles and aunties, cousins, often meeting for a cuppa or a ‘feast’, gathering for tea parties, birthdays, picnics and beach days. We had some great friends around us to help support our family, often lending a hand around the house or in other helpful ways, Lee, Twain, James, Gemma, Sabrina, Nic and Stace.
Saff was a joy to have around, often keeping herself busy or helping around the house. This really helped when her siblings followed closely. Two years later Kodi, then quickly twin sisters Yazmin and Izzy. All four girls aged 3 and under.
It was a busy household, crazy, messy, fun, noisy. It was like a herd of children but she managed to maintain some authority over her younger sisters, often telling them how to do things properly. We spent lots of time together. We would dance around the front room, with Saffron, Kodi, Yazmin and Izzy taking their turn to stand on my feet, or sit on a hip, holding hands, ballroom dancing, until we couldn’t dance anymore.
Debbie was a big part of this time, a college student on placement with us for an early years course. Debbie became a very good friend of ours and spent lots of time with us as the girls grew.Her help around these crazy young years allowed us to spend more time with Saff and Kodi as she was a great help with the twins, or on the other hand would always be there for Saff and Kodi if I was busy with the twins. She became part of our crazy, fun, creatively messy family.
Saff could by shy at times. It took a while to build confidence around new people. We signed her up to a Street dance club in Black Notley when she was 3, and swimming lessons at Riverside in Braintree. This helped her reach out and start making some great friendships.
She went to Rainbow Nursery, then John Ray Infant School where she met more solid friends, Abigail, Emily, and their families who continue to be good friends.
Our social circle grew, as did our friends and families. There were lots of fun days out visiting Dorewoods Hall Farm, Saff’s favourite. Many hours spent here petting the goats, sheep, rabbits, donkey and feeding the ducks.
We would visit the river, catching fish with nets and containers or pop to the public gardens-here I remember a very young Saff picking up bumble bees from the clover on the grass, placing them in the palm of her hand, stroking their backs with a tiny finger, saying they’re cute and fluffy (much to my horror) but seeing the intent in her eyes allowed me to understand that she saw the world in a different way. She nurtured the tiny glimpses of the wonderful nature around her.
Primary age
In 2005, moving to Malyon Close, Saff decided she wanted to change schools closer to home, and started at St Michaels aged 6. As Saff developed a group of close friends; Jess her best friend, Jannah and later Amber and Nadia. Saff would spend countless hours with these friends that helped build who she became. Sleepovers, DS gaming, baking, sleepovers and just being together.
She was cheeky and fun, her energy would bounce to others. She was creative, keeping busy for hours, painting, sticking, gluing and later taking photographs, a digital camera gift and underwater camera were her starting points before her later interest in Polaroid and her Canon camera.
Saff continued with clubs as it seemed to be a great way to build her confidence; Street dance
Gymnastics, Ballet - Saff seemed to love physical groups like dancing. She loved horseriding, but not so much when it got cold! Then there were the Brownies and Guides. RSPBflute, bikes, scooters, exploring, walking, going to the beach. Her curiosity for gadgets, DS, Wii, headphones, laptop and music. Saff went swimming every week forever. Whatever clubs came and went, swimming was the solid club she continued, her arm technique was strong and she made it look so easy.
We had holidays Caravan camping all over the place;Lowestoft, Hastings, Wales, Cornwall, Isles of Scilly, Isle of Wight. It was very exciting for all of us, squeezing a weeks’ worth of kit into a car. Saff refused to sit next to Kodi, as she didn’t want to be splashed with sick, sorry Kodi. Whetheronto a tiny caravan, or mansion tent, all of us learning how to micro live as we went, this was new for all of us, camp cooking, fire pits, picnicking, playing, rainy days, card games, crafting, bike rides, days out, beach fun and open fields, brave cliff diving IaptKynace Cove, this was the beginning of some great travel adventures, not luxurious, just raw and real, discovering new personalities and smiles from around the country. Saff didn’t find it difficult to find new friends.
We enjoyed lots of special days out; Museums in London, some of the bigger sights and along the Thames. We also had lots of memorable days at local beaches, rivers and on the Flitch track, riding or walking, or at the Discovery Centre. Often, we would collaborate with cousins or friends to make a big day out, which Saff really enjoyed.
Music was always a big part of Saffs joy, often listening to old Cd collections and iTunes from her laptop, as well as current pop, her collection was vast and varied.
Her ability to recite the script of Simpson’s the movie, or sing in harmony to her favourite songs made us mad or mad with envy, we couldn’t sit and watch the film without a guaranteed character voice impersonation.
Saff was always very neat and tidy, everything had its place and her room was immaculate. She took pride in her room often feeling as though it was interior design inspired. There was colour and size organisation to books, clothes, shoes, make up and pens. She loved keeping things in order and finding the right place for her bedroom items, she was a bit of a perfectionist, but this was part of the fascinating personality she was.
High school
Saff was always known for kicking her shoes and socks off, unless she was cold, then she would layer herself in fluffy socks, blankets and hot water bottles. She would find a sun patch in the garden, normally the summerhouse step and read or listen to music with the cats.Megan, Fred and Luna. The cats were her followers.They knew they would get undivided attention from Saff and maybe even the odd sneak treat from the fridge or some of her bacon sandwich. Bribing Fred to roll over like the dog we all joked that he should’ve been. Fred was often the star attraction of Saffs informal photo and video collection, and he loved that, they had an understanding and an unspoken bond.
Throughout high school Swimming continued, progressing to Lifeguarding club which she thoroughly enjoyed and was particularly good at. Swimming took up a large portion of our lives, often spending a few days each week at the pool between all four sisters.
Saffron took photography at high school as a choice for her exams, she was so talented in her own style it seemed the right choice. She often spent time behind a lens, or with a camera close by, avoiding being photographed herself.You were lucky if you managed to capture her beauty on film. Saffron loved taking abstract photos, documenting beauty in the unknown. Who knew that rust and everyday mundane item could be so colourful? Saff had eager eyes, absorbing the environment and projecting its wonder, similar to how light travelling through a prism would be refracted into the colours of a rainbow. She always spotted those rainbows, quickly taking a photo before the sun hid behind a cloud or moved a fraction.
We started exploring further afield, investing in passports meant we could travel abroad and this was very exciting for everyone. We made some fantastic memories in Italy, Spain, Germany and France, switching between camping, Airbnb stays and all you can eat hotels. These were all brilliant opportunities that Saff, Kodi, Yazmin and Izzy continued to bring up and speak of fondly.They would all recall the type of accommodation we stayed in, the room they stayed in and the features of the quirky home-stays. They would recount the people that made our journeys significant and the kindness in those that struck a memory, the places we were amazed by and the food that satisfied an explorer’s hangry belly.We tried out a festival too, camping for a few days at Latitude in 2012. This was a fabulous event that sparked our yearning to revisit one day, full of fun and creativity, alternative music that inspired Saffs playlists for years to come, Ben Howard and Lana Del Ray.
A 13th or 14th birthday treat to the Teen Awards concert in London and a gig for the new band Bastille’s early days really concreted Saffs love for music, Bastille becoming Saffs life soundtrack, that she would come back to again and again, for long car journeys, surprise radio edits, nights out and gatherings with friends.
Saff desperately wanted to invest in a penny board (skateboard), I think she’d seen one on her favourite youtuber account. she saved all her birthday and pocket money and bought a glow in the dark board. She spent hours falling off, getting back up, bruised and grazed knees,hips and elbows, gradually teaching herself to make it look effortless. She spent hours at the top of George yard car park with Amber, running through hacks to get a good glide. This became her best mode of transport for years, she would be known for her hair whipping in the wind, skating down the road in her converse to get to a friends house or even to college or work.
Her style began to develop and she has specific items that she loved wearing, long, straight, dip dyed hair, headphones which became a typical look for her but was more of a necessity as she loved her music. She perfected her eyeliner flicks and neat eyebrows. She would wear many pairs of unique earrings, waiting for their turn, piled in her room. She wore her vans as endlessly as her many colours of converse, her rare, light blue timberlands and white DMs.
But mostly she wore that smile. She had enormous spirit, her energy beamed from her soul, heart, smile and laugh. She had an aura that drew you in, a kind soul, forever listening, she would listen intently to you but never knew how much she could mesmerise you with her stories and detail so great you could literally imagine being there with her, in that moment.
Her beauty was more than what you saw, it was how she made you feel. She was beautiful but didn’t know it.
College/university
Saff really blossomed at Braintree college, studying photography, which she clearly had natural talent, passion and dedication to/for. Still a significant look was Saff with a camera, she seemed to capture moments every second. Her love for abstract or landscape beauty was profound.
At college she met some new characters that she spent some great times with, and everyday with, and this was more important in lots of ways. It built her confidence, adding memories and making some lasting, brilliant friendships. These friends remained close to her heart, she always spoke of them and tried to meet as often as she could after the college days. She stretched as a person, working hard to achieve her potential, creativity and reaching out of her comfort zone which undoubtedly gave her the love of life and all it had to offer.
Saff had the opportunity to visit a good friend Sam, in Melbourne, Australia when she was just 17. This was a big deal and a life changing event for her. Sam and his family were very kind in offering her to stay with them for Christmas and New Year. She travelled all that way on her own. She was brave and free, lapping up the fresh glimpse into life on the other side of the world. Thanks to Sam’s family she tried many new experiences, surfing atBondi beach, dolphin sailing, a tepenyaki restaurant, Sydney harbour, meeting extended family in landmark places that she explained in great detail on her return. She was so thankful to them enabling her to have that chance.
A few months from here, Saff began training for her lifeguard qualification, a week’s intense course in Halstead, during a half term, which led to employment at Braintree Swimming Pool, somewhere she had spent many hours of her life. She initially viewed it as just a job, but it became clear that she enjoyed spending time with the team here. Her shifts were often early so she would be out of the door before anyone was awake. We all knew her work days as there was a familiar rhythm to the sounds of her leaving the house, she would stomp down the stairs (and probably back up again a couple of times) before shutting the door and gliding her penny board on the pavement out of ear shot. She was super at getting organised and managing her time but she would probably never agree, she was methodical and precise, running on lists, I was envious of her organisation.
This is where she met some significant lifeguard friends Kacper and Jordan, which also led to some great links to other groups of mates that she spent some hilarious moments and life memories with. Random drives, a last-minute trip to Paris, 24 hours in Bremen, London days out, exploring, camping, travels and time together that meant everything to her.
Saff started to date Jordan in 2017 and her already happy spirit was lifted immensely, she found someone that she could be herself with and for the next few years we watched her and them grow together and develop, both especially in their own right into awesome, well rounded, dedicated people.
Saff worked hard during the last year at college and in 2018 got amazing A level grades and decided to take the leap and leave for Nottingham Trent University, Jordan also studying in Nottingham concreted her decision to embark on a new adventure. She was brave and ready, settling in over time. We are all incredibly proud of her hard work and determination. She showed resilience and the immense need to thrive and be independent, something that took courage and trust in herself.
In Nottingham, Saffs solid friendships grew, she met so many inspirational friends, many personalities, pods of people she could celebrate, dance, sing, chat the night away and mooch with, people she could rely on, joke with, share stories with and just be herself around. The stories she would tell back home led to the realisation that they and Jordan were her foundation of her future. She was surrounded by the life she wanted to create. She showed great enjoyment retelling stories of where she’d been in the city, what happened that night and filling us in about the people she loved spending time with. Saff made an excellent hostess, loving showing us around her accommodation and the sights and tastes of Nottingham.
Saff had many pods of friends that she loved.(oh my gaaad, I love them)She often told us stories of her impromptu days out, drives and meet ups, as well as ‘cute’ Starbucks dates and Yo Sushi snacks. She loved spontaneous trips and had a few to tellabout- her eyes sparkled and her hands animated as she recounted the exciting adventures with people she loved, laughing hard and loud, squealing at hilarious moments. It didn’t need to be a big plan, she relished on the details and would explain the beauty captured through her eyes, of the places she walked, the delights she tasted, the environment she absorbed, all with people she loved.
She had favourite places, people, food and drinks, wholesome loved jumpers and well trodden shoes but loved the comfort of her trusty faves as well as the thrill of finding new adventures, amazing friends and unexpected delicious tastes (this was relatively new for saff-she spent years trusting her old home made dinners)
Saff was full of love, she was wonderful, magnificent, humble, cheeky yet charming, with an infectious, full body laugh, She had a curiousness about her but was relatable.
Her style was impeccable, she had her own look and wore it well. She made it look flawless and effortless.
No friend was left behind, she tried to keep all her best people in her current life, often planning a day out, trip, catch up or skate.
She loved a swear word or two and if the content wasn’t enough to make you both horrified and snot with laughter at the same time her conviction for the way she said it would make you weirdly proud.
We are all so immensely proud of Saff, who she was, the Saff she developed to be and the Saff we all think of when we reminisce about our special times together.
Richard the pastor from Nottingham stated:
“If someone said to you, we are going to give you this baby, but you can only have her for 21 years, would you say no?”
You would just jump at the chance to have her and all the joy and happiness she would bring.
As parents invest themselves into their children and they become part of you, Saff is woven into us, we are entwined, we will carry her,all of us.
She has become a huge part of ourselves, our choices, our thoughts and who we have become. Whether something small or much more consuming, Saff is like the sunshine, her warm smile, her radiant kindness and love pour out of her soul. That has saturated our hearts and lives forever.
The sun reflects off the moon so we can see it in its glory.
Saff once wrote,
Wherever we are in the world, we can look at the moon together, isn’t it amazing that we can share that
