ForeverMissed
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This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, SSG Allen Fenwick, 46 years old, born on September 7, 1964, and passed away on May 31, 2011. We will remember him forever.
September 7, 2023
September 7, 2023
Happy Heavenly Birthday,man. I'll try to be better at keeping an eye on your love, maybe take a trip to CA and lay eyes on her for you. I know you're always watching over her and the girls.
May 31, 2022
May 31, 2022
Today is 11 years since we lost you. It is the first over the years of the exact day and date you passed. It is still so hard to believe you are gone. I can still hear your laughter and see your face. I can also still see you laying there and thinking this can not be true. Even after all this time, I hope to wake up and find it was all just a dream. They say time heals all wounds but my heart will never fully heal because a piece of it is missing. You were the heart and soul of our family. The joy, laughter, healer, support, and everything we still need so very much. I would give anything to see your face and to hold your hand again.

Your daughters have grown into beautiful young women, I wish you could see them. They are both enrolled in college now and you would be so proud. I spent a lot of years not doing exactly what you hoped I would but I found my way. I just graduated with my master's degree and am on my way to becoming a forensic psychologist. Of course, I can hear you now telling me that a woman does not belong around criminals! But I know you would be proud. It is because of you that your daughters and I are the women we are today. You gave us so much and you can never be replaced. I love you, we love you, and always will. 
June 2, 2021
June 2, 2021
This May 31st marked the 10th year since Allen's death. It seemed worthy of poignamt remarks, but I didn't come up with anything poignant. Nonetheless, the passage of time is a strange phenomenon. I can recall that day and the ensuing days through the funeral service as vividly as if it just happened. However, much has occurred in 10 years that supports the notion that it really has been 10 years. I had my job interview 10 years ago on the same day of Allen's death, and I have now had that job for ten years. Feather and Elena were 10 years younger and are now young ladies. My and Allen's nephews were just 8 and 6 when we went to San Antonio to visit that Memorial weekend. Eli is now 18 and graduating from high school while Jake is 16 and driving. Two additional nephews, Jed and Isaac, have joined our nieces, Sarah and Bekah, in my sister's family.  Dad (also known as Grandpa Fenwick) is on his own after the death of our mother. Allen's son passed away. Much time has passed and while the loss of our brother has become accepted, a part of our family is still missing and always remembered.
September 7, 2020
September 7, 2020
Today you would have been 56 years old...We would have teased you about being an old man. Oh how I wish you were here. After all these years I can still see your face and here your voice...I can’t believe your gone. Your daughters and I miss you so much. Sometimes it seems like it was just yesterday you were here and then gone. There will forever be a hole in our lives but not in our hearts as that’s where you live within us everyday. Happy Birthday. I love you.
June 3, 2020
June 3, 2020
There are so many memories for our family that all sorts of things evoke thoughts of Allen. It is hard to believe how many years have now passed since that tragic day. We remember and talk about Allen often, and he is still missed. Just the other day, Tammy (cousin), talked about a three-wheeler experience that had been unforgettable. That made me think of the only I time I ever skipped out of a class in college. I and a friend of mine went with Allen and one of his friends to the Little Sahara in Oklahoma to go three-wheeling. Also, anyone that knew our mom might be surprised that she loved driving the three-wheeler when Allen showed her how to ride. Allen will continue to be remembered and missed.
July 13, 2019
July 13, 2019
Today would have been our 20th anniversary. I am so thankful for the 12 years I got to have with you. I am thankful that I was able to know and feel what it’s like to truly be loved unconditionally. They were 12 of the best years of my life. I miss you.
May 31, 2019
May 31, 2019
They will always miss you... They are still doing well, still beautiful and still a huge piece of my heart. I know you're watching over them.
May 31, 2019
May 31, 2019
Today marks 8 years we lost you. You were taken so young and too soon. Our daughters and I still love and miss you so much and think of you all the time. You gave us so much. You were such a wonderful husband, father, friend, and man...the strength, love, compassion, and heart of our family. Losing you changed our lives so much..It’s been so hard these years without you. We know you are still with us but we wish you were here.
September 7, 2017
September 7, 2017
Happy 53rd birthday. You were taken far too soon. We love and miss you so much everyday. It is still so hard to believe you are gone.
May 31, 2017
May 31, 2017
Allen, although it has been 6 years since you were taken from us, it feels like only yesterday. You are so loved and missed everyday. Not only by your family but by many. Your daughters and I still receive contact from those who's lives you touched. You were an amazing husband, father, son, friend, and soldier. We are all better for having had you in our lives no matter how brief. ❤️
May 31, 2017
May 31, 2017
I I0ved y0u because y0u I0ved her...I I0ved y0u because y0u I0ved the girIs...I kn0w y0u I00k d0wn 0n them and that y0u're aIways with them. I wish y0u hadn't Ieft....she I0ves and misses y0u s0 much...
May 31, 2016
May 31, 2016
Today marks 5 years that u were taken from us. It's still so hard to believe your gone. Life still seems so unfair. The pain is still like yesterday. I would give anything to have you back. I miss you and think of you everyday. I love you always my love...always.
May 31, 2015
May 31, 2015
Four years ago today Allen's family, immediate and extended, was tragically changed forever. It certainly is true that he is "forever missed". It is also true that the family members we are fortunate to still have with us are that much more appreciated. This is a day for remembering. Coming from a sister of Allen, I can't help but remember so much fun, so much ornery, so much commitment to serving his country and so much life.
September 7, 2014
September 7, 2014
So I woke up wondering if we would be having a HUGE 50th birthday bash for you. Maybe I would have come down to Texas, and you could have met my new Beau. I miss you, yes. But the truth is, I only met you once. Aside from that, I miss you so much for my sister Supreenia, and those beautiful girls growing up without you. I miss you every time I hear pain in the voices, every time I see their pictures with smiles covering the pain. Oh, how I wish this hadn't happened to you. So, Happy Birthday Allen! I know the party in Heaven will be AMAZING!!
September 7, 2014
September 7, 2014
Today would have been your 50th birthday. I still struggle with the belief that you are really gone. I miss you so much. You were such a wonderful man with so much more life to live. Not a day goes by that our daughters and I do not think about you and wish you were here. While you are not here in body you are here in our hearts. Happy Birthday!
July 14, 2014
July 14, 2014
Today would have been our 15 year wedding anniversary. I miss you so much. Life is not the same without you. I am so thankful that I had you in my life. Because of you I knew what unconditional love is like. I had something so many never have. I wish you were here. You were supposed to be my forever the one I grew old with. I love you so much and I always will.
May 31, 2013
May 31, 2013
Today marks 2 years since you were taken from your family. It has been hard for us being without you. We miss you and love you very much. It is so hard especially for your children not having you here. I know you are watching over us and we need you so much. Life is not the same without you. You brought so much love, safety and security to our lives. You were our rock. We love you!
November 24, 2011
November 24, 2011
It has been six months since you were taken from us. Thanksgiving will not be the same without you. There is no one here to steal food while I am cooking, annoy me about cooking too much food, and constantly asking if it is ready yet! It will be hard for us to sit at the table and not see your smiling face. We love and miss you very much!
September 7, 2011
September 7, 2011
Happy Birthday Allen!!! Today you would have been 47 years old. I miss you so very much. Today, your daughters and I will celebrate the life you had and the life you gave us! I love you!!!
July 13, 2011
July 13, 2011
Happy 12th Anniversary! I love and miss you! I would give anything to have you back. I have decided to spend today celebrating the life and love we shared. I will be sending you part of my soul today in the hope that once again we may become one, if only for a moment.

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Recent Tributes
September 7, 2023
September 7, 2023
Happy Heavenly Birthday,man. I'll try to be better at keeping an eye on your love, maybe take a trip to CA and lay eyes on her for you. I know you're always watching over her and the girls.
May 31, 2022
May 31, 2022
Today is 11 years since we lost you. It is the first over the years of the exact day and date you passed. It is still so hard to believe you are gone. I can still hear your laughter and see your face. I can also still see you laying there and thinking this can not be true. Even after all this time, I hope to wake up and find it was all just a dream. They say time heals all wounds but my heart will never fully heal because a piece of it is missing. You were the heart and soul of our family. The joy, laughter, healer, support, and everything we still need so very much. I would give anything to see your face and to hold your hand again.

Your daughters have grown into beautiful young women, I wish you could see them. They are both enrolled in college now and you would be so proud. I spent a lot of years not doing exactly what you hoped I would but I found my way. I just graduated with my master's degree and am on my way to becoming a forensic psychologist. Of course, I can hear you now telling me that a woman does not belong around criminals! But I know you would be proud. It is because of you that your daughters and I are the women we are today. You gave us so much and you can never be replaced. I love you, we love you, and always will. 
June 2, 2021
June 2, 2021
This May 31st marked the 10th year since Allen's death. It seemed worthy of poignamt remarks, but I didn't come up with anything poignant. Nonetheless, the passage of time is a strange phenomenon. I can recall that day and the ensuing days through the funeral service as vividly as if it just happened. However, much has occurred in 10 years that supports the notion that it really has been 10 years. I had my job interview 10 years ago on the same day of Allen's death, and I have now had that job for ten years. Feather and Elena were 10 years younger and are now young ladies. My and Allen's nephews were just 8 and 6 when we went to San Antonio to visit that Memorial weekend. Eli is now 18 and graduating from high school while Jake is 16 and driving. Two additional nephews, Jed and Isaac, have joined our nieces, Sarah and Bekah, in my sister's family.  Dad (also known as Grandpa Fenwick) is on his own after the death of our mother. Allen's son passed away. Much time has passed and while the loss of our brother has become accepted, a part of our family is still missing and always remembered.
Recent stories

5 Years

June 1, 2016

So yesterday was your five year mark of passing. You are missed and loved more each day. I wrote this for you, a bit ago. I hope you like this. I know you are happy, with your mom and your son by your side, love you forever 

Dad

Within every waking hour

In every aching step

I am painfully reminded of you

I wait restlessly for a sign

A calling that would rest my fingers

Something I suppress still

I am searching at every turn

Where are the bright lights they spoke of?

When will I know you've come back?

You're in such a euphoria

You wouldn't be able to recognize my name

My face has morphed into the unfamiliar

I find myself unafraid of your embrace

To hear of all the magic you've created

To smile in your awaited wake

I've loved you, missed my teacher

No soul has yet managed to hold position

Why should they even try?

You are where my soul belongs

In debt to your kindness and thought

In every bird of every bird

In every minute on my swing

You are always with me 

Dad

May 24, 2013

The two year anniversary is steadily approaching and it all seems quite crazy to me. I still cannot believe you died, you, of all of the people. (tbc)

MY FRIEND SUPREENIA

September 6, 2011
Beethoven's Symphony No. 9 (Scherzo)

WHEN SUPREENIA TOLD ME HAD MARRIED  A GUY SHE HAD ONLY KNOWN THREE MONTHS, I THOUGHT SHE WAS CRAZY.  I HAD TO SEE FOR MYSELF.  I WENT TO SEE HER AND WOW!  I HAD ALWAYS WANTED HER TO FIND SOMEONE WHO LOVED HER FOR WHO SHE WAS.  SOMEONE THAT COULD LOOK BEYOND HER BEAUTIFUL FACE AND SMOKIN BODY (:-)) AND SEE THE REAL PERSON INSIDE.  ALLEN DID.  I SAW HIM....I SAW HIM LOOKING AT HER WHEN SHE WASN'T LOOKING.  I COULD SEE THE LOVE AND AMAZEMENT IN HIS EYES.  THAT'S WHAT I WANTED.  HE LOVED SUPREENIA, THE GOOD AND THE BAD.  HE LOVED HER IN THE WAY WE ALL HOPE AND DREAM TO BE LOVED. 

SOON AFTER MEETING ALLEN, I MET MY HUSBAND.  IF IT HADN'T BEEN FOR MY DEAR FRIEND, AND ALLEN, I MAY HAVE WAITED TOO LONG AND MISSED OUT ON THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME.  WE TOO ONLY KNEW EACH OTHER THREE MONTHS BEFORE WE GOT MARRIED.  MY HEART BREAKS WHEN I THINK OF ALLEN AND SUPREENIA APART.  I KNOW, HOWEVER, THAT THEIR HEARTS ARE MELDED TOGETHER FOREVER.  EVEN THOUGH WE CAN'T SEE HIM, I KNOW HE'S THERE WATCHING OVER HER AND THE KIDS.

I LOVE YOU SUPREENIA.  I ALWAYS WILL.  EVEN THOUGH WE NEVER SEE EACH OTHER, AND RARELY TALK, I CONSIDER YOU ONE OF MY DEAREST FRIENDS.  I WISH I COULD HAVE KNOWN ALLEN BETTER, BUT I KNEW ALL I NEEDED TO KNOW.  IT WAS WRITTEN ALL OVER HIS FACE WHEN HE LOOKED AT YOU.

HE WAS A WONDERFUL MAN INDEED.

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