I came to Madison today and sat at Papa Mummy's bench for a while.  Not so long ago both Papa and I used to go there and he would always send off a balloon for Mummy.  I just sat there and talked to him for a little while.  It was a cold and dreary kind of day.  I felt his spirit there.  He missed mummy very much after she was gone - I guess this is normal.  But I think he would have been able to bear his condition better if Mummy was still around.  Mummy lost everything when he had the stroke - the last protection; her room; and her will to live (though she had promised me not so long ago "I won't give up".  But she did.  She talked very little after he had his stroke.  Papa lost everything when Mummy left us.  He was very lonely and even lost his home and was forced to move to nursing home.  Even though he and Mummy didn't talk much as he spent a lot of time on computer, the feeling that the other person is there - just an arm's length away - must have been a comfort.  Once it was gone and he even lost his home, it was very hard for him.  Harder than we can imagine.  But he still smiled a lot.  Everyone who knew him always mentioned his "Big smile".  I don't know where he got the strength to smile and to play bridge and to learn to paint and to learn and do so many things.  When my time comes, I hope my parents and grandparents will be there, in spirit, to have the strength to not fall apart.<br />

But it was a nice day, though sad, at Swan Creek Park talking to Papa...  Hope he heard...  Though he probably made face and said "but, where is my balloon?" :-)

Had I been there, I would have tried to stop him; fought with him but he still would have done it!  He did have fun!  and he was very proud of this adventure.

Papa bought a van in July of 2015 inspite of everyone else's advise.  He was determined to pass his tests held by OT at Meriter and MVA.  He found the van on his own, had it made accessible with ramp; installed a rear-view camera and whatever else was needed.  He started picking me up again at the airport - did that twice and drove me around town.  It was just as scary now as it used to be prior to his stroke.  He was a fast-driver - though never had an accident in his life!  His brave genes did not transfer to me.

This was taken on October 4, 2015, 2 days before his 82nd birthday at the Community Center.  He made every effort to go there for "Puja" with people who cared a great deal for him. I envy and admire the way he could laugh even under these circumstances.  So much loss and yet he could find strength and the will to do so much.  How did you do it, Papa?

Papa never held a paint brush in his hand!  Have never known him to draw.  He was a number-person.  But an artist was discovered at Belmont when he started going to Activities.  To my surprise, he loved these classes.  He sent me and Chris a few.  Now I have most; few are with grand-children.

Enjoying the challenge of a flight of stairs with student staff in Adapted Fitness.

Tim and Sushil agreeing to the days exercise plan

Sushil enjoyed coming to class in uniform