Remembering Helen Lega Tata and Dr. Thomas Fofung Tata
By Dr. Marie Ngetiko Fongwa
March 28, 2021
“Bani hya njiti won” – Bali Nyonga people say, that Is how it starts!
Ma Helen, I had started to wonder why you were not responding to my telephone calls or to my text messages over several days.
Then on March 10 at 10:07 pm I received the last text message from you, “we are down with COVID”.
My heart sunk but it is now a common thing to hear!
I immediately sent a prescriptive note on how to ‘fight COVID-19’ at home in addition to Western approaches – steam inhalation of boiled lemon grass, ginger, garlic, lemon/lime fruit and onion.
Prayers, prayers, prayers, many times in tears and on my knees and silence from you end.
Understanding from the voice of my nursing education – conserve energy for disease fight and healing.
I devised a different approach to keeping in touch: taping my prayers in Mungaka and singing all our favorite Mungaka songs from the hymn book and sending to you to share with Ba Nkom Tata. Texting as soon as I get up from bed and before going to bed, quickly set into place.
No response! I worried and cried! Felt helpless but hung to hope and denying that the unthinkable might be near! You, Ma Helen, No! It cannot be!
Then I received the news of your hospitalization in the next two days for breathing difficulty!
My heart sank deeper, my knees knocked, lots of uncontrolled tears became my friend; sadness!
On Sunday March 13th and just before I went into zoom church, you called and I saw you in full hospital gear fight against coronavirus – in hospital bed, mask pulled down, nasal oxygen cannula in place, shrouded in a mask of tiredness; a few words uttered by you and I said it would be okay because our living God is in control all the time; less than a minute video call but you wanted me to see you and you repeated, “Tom is in the tent” (no in room space)! Yes, I saw you and that would be the last live video image of you I hold onto.
I joined the zoom church in tears and could not wait for the prayers of the people time!
My anxiety level was up and I could feel the butterfly feeling in my gut! Fear was all over me!
During the people’s prayer time, I called your name and Ba Nkom and the congregation joined me to say, God, in your mercy! Panic set in as all calls from relatives were of heavy duty.
Idea of moving you to another hospital was scary to me because of low oxygen saturation level!
Telephone call to Ba Nkom Tata was a dead end – no answer!
Oh, I was scared and helpless and it was in place!
It is about Ma Helen; the only one Ma Helen Lega in my little life.
Ma Helen, friend and sister from childhood! I was restless and crying every now then.
Fear was all over me.
On Wednesday, March 16th, I cried almost all day – audio taped the Mungaka prayer to you very early in the morning; at a grocery parking lot, I tearfully audio taped my last song to you – “In the hollow of His hands”. The song says I am safe whatever may betide me in the hollow of His hands!
That Wednesday evening Ma Patience Ndi called me and I kept clearing my throat and she asked me to take a drink of a water; that was when I told her I had been crying almost all day – the image of you wearing that mask in the hospital and the oxygen cannula did something to my soul!
I went to bed only to be woke up by Ma Patience on Thursday, March 18th, morning with a painful cry! I asked if you had passed and she reminded me of my crying the day before and then added that it was time for me to cry as Ba Nkom Tata was no more!
I could not believe my ears and all the screaming woke up everyone in the house.
I never got the chance to say word to him since I heard you say both of you were down with COVID six days earlier.
He was gone, just like that! What a fast drama!
You, Ma Helen, called me, within the hour of my hearing the news, crying that Ba was gone and you said, “fang ngwen weh a oh” (I am in a bind) and I said “fang ngwen weh bo oh (we are in a bind). Your voice was stronger than it was the week before and hopeful.
But fear had taken over my life and each time I communicated with you, I tried to shield you from my deep fear of the unknown – you were very ill and your beloved husband was no more!
At the zoom church service on March 21, I informed my church that Ba Nkom had passed on but powerful prayer for your healing was requested; later that day, I learned that you had been moved to Mbingo hospital for a much more centered care and that the outlook was hopeful and I joined in the shaky hope. Sunday/Monday night was a very difficult night for me as I tossed in bed almost all night, was still awake by 3:30 a.m. and by 5:30 am I was quite awake but feeling tired, for I had not slept for more than two hours all night!
Ma Alice Lima called and updated me on a possible treatment plan for Tuesday, March 22.
We were hanging on a very thin thread of hope as we ended the conversation and for me to go teach a class and for Ma Alice to join a prayer chain on Ma Helen’s behalf.
In class, I alerted my students that my telephone was on because of possible emergency call from Cameroon and they were understanding.
Low and behold, Ma Alice called in the middle of slide presentation; the students said I should go answer the call and I told them I will instead call her back during break.
In less than five minutes, I noticed another call and this time from Ba Nkehti Vincent Gwanyama. I took permission from the students to end the class half hour earlier!
Life had become unpredictable and the sequence of events were so emotionally charged now!
Within the hour of my ending the class earlier, Ma Alice Lima called back and this time with the saddest news that you, our Mama Helen, has also passed on!
March 22, 2021, a day to remember, when Helen Lega Tata left this world for eternity!
Just four days after your beloved husband who preceded you in death on March 18th!
I am at a lost, weary, and confused about how to continue without you, Ma Helen.
You were so central in all of our lives and I had my special space in your life!
Oh our experiences – Sunday school days when your favorite song was, “Are you ready?” and the each of us will answer, “Yes I am ready” and we clapped our hands in joy and full of hope.
Yes, we had every reason to be happy, as children in our then, simple and lovely village, Bali.
Primary school years were exciting and I will visit you at your grant aunt’s place, Na Sarah Segmia.
Then you were the first to lead the way to Saker Baprist College in 1964.
I and Patience could not wait to join you and we did in 1965 and Alic in 1966.
You were the older one and you set me, Patience, and Alice in place.
We obeyed and followed your footsteps in studying and behavior.
We rarely worked punishment for behavior problems because you were our role model.
Occasionally, you would be taken home by late Ni John Fomuso because your eyes hurt and we will be sad for a few days but happy when you returned and usually with goodies from Ma Elizabeth Fomuso that you will share with us.
Ma Helen, Holidays times during our Saker years were great – you will either go to late Ni Robinson in Tiko or to Late Ni Ruden Akwa and I will come by from my late uncle, Aladji Fritz Dohnyem for a visit. We would spend hours cooking, eating, singing and dancing to record song book tunes.
Our after-Saker Baptist college life concentrated on nuclear family building, further education and career building.
Most of all, our friendship grew stronger and stronger – you represented me and I represented you in so many circumstances until the time of your death.
We visited each other back and forth and in different parts of the world!
We shared and supplied as needed with no second thought whenever the need arose!
That was an irreplaceable value we cherished – we knew and trusted each other to the depth!
We relied on each other- for our level of trust for each other was firm and solid.
Our lives and homes are marked with evidence of the truth about our relationship.
Our emotional and instrumental support of each other are written in the story of our lives!
We were there for each other at all times in our lives and with amazingly un-doubtful styles.
An example to illustrate our trust-of-each-other life which turned out to be our last encounter in this life is you calling me in late evening on September 9, 2020, to say you arrived Los Angeles and will see me soon. I asked for the airport terminal to come pick you up and you said not to worry because you were in the Uber already. In less than 30 minutes, you were at my front door with a large suitcase full of food and other things you deemed good for all of us.
Ma Helen, we had quality time for two days and that was our last until we meet in eternity. Some of the foods you brought in September, 2020 are still in the freezer but you are no more!
Ma Helen, you were one in town – beautiful inside and outside, represented truth, reliable, generous, grateful, caring, energetic, dynamic and hardworking.
Truth is God and you presented God in your efforts to make the truth stand tall in this world.
Life is a journey; Ma Helen Lega Tata, you walked this life, fulfilled the meaning of what life meant to you joyfully, and it ended on March 22, 2021 for you to go meet with your Maker, God. As long as I remain in this life, I will try to mimic you so you can truly be at peace – I must continue the journey in the best way I can possibly move it.
Ba Nkom Gwankudla, Dr. Thomas Fofung Tata, You had to go and your beloved wife Helen was bound to go with you. What a pair of love birds!
Your wife needed your companion and you were always there – together in Cameroon, Geneva, the United States and now in eternity.
I am at a lost but Ba, having taken your seat with the elders, you know we are all confused for the departure by you and Mamon Helen Lega Tata who was always ready to go with you.
Ba and Mamon, we ask that you intercede with the angels to look down on earth on all the children and grandchildren you left behind.
You both cared for and loved your children and grandchildren and they miss you dearly.
Ba Nkom, thank you again for all the many things you did for and on our behalves while on earth here including you taking my late father, Ba Tita Fongwa to Mbingo hospital for eye surgery.
We will try our best until we too shall meet again and never to part anymore.
May the loving God of compassion receive the both of you and preserve for His lovely purpose in eternity. Rest in perfect peace Ba Nkom Thomas and Mamon Helen Tata.
What is the silent lesson your two deaths from COVID-19 has taught those still here?
COVID-19 was your path to leave this world, no dispute!
We are challenged to look and listen for the silent lesson so that your deaths would not be in vain. Amen and Amen.