ForeverMissed

TRYING TO DESCRIBE SOMEONE’S LIFE IN A FEW SHORT MOMENTS IS NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE, HOW DO YOU DO JUSTICE TO SOMEONE WHO MEANT SO MUCH TO THE MANY PEOPLE WHO LOVED HIM ? TOMMY WAS A STABLE YOUNG MAN IN AN UNSTABLE WORLD. HE NEVER EXPERIENCED FAME OR FORTUNE, HE LEFT NO GREAT WORKS OF ART, WROTE NO BOOKS, MADE NO GREAT DISCOVERY……. YET HE IMPACTED MANY OF US WITH HIS LOVE AND HIS FRIENDSHIP. FOR THOSE WHO KNEW HIM, THEY KNEW HIS GOALS WERE HIGH, HIS JOYS WERE SIMPLE, HIS FRIENDSHIP AND LOVE FOR THOSE HE LOVED WAS UNQUESTIONABLE. HIS LOYALTIES.. UNDENIABLE. IF YOUR STOPPING BY THIS PAGE YOU PROBABLY KNEW TOMMY AN LOVED HIM. THIS PAGE WAS CREATED FOR ANYONE WHO KNEW HIM TO LEAVE MESSAGES TO HIM OR HIS LOVED ONES. ANY TIME HE IS ON YOUR MIND FEEL FREE TO COME TO HIS PAGE AND SEND HIM YOUR LOVE!

Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2019
Thinking of you a s I often due just watching the years go by and wishing things was different!!! Still missing you everyday and thinking about you,lots of love Dad...
Posted by William Goodknight on May 21, 2019
Another birthday is here and just want you to know everyone is still thinking of you and misses you.Many years have passed but you are remembered e everyday throughout the year!!!
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2018
It is another year gone by and still thinking of you.Alot of changes has taken place but you are missed by everyone everyday!!! You will always be loved and missed.
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2017
Another year has passed and still missing you,you were taken away to soon from this crazy world.Things has changed but you are always thought of and missed always thinking of you love forever dad....
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2016
Another year has passed and we have to get up everyday missing you and slot has changed,but everyone is still thinking of you wishing you were here.Still loved and missed but always with us.Lots of love Dad.
Posted by William Goodknight on May 21, 2016
Happy Birthday another year gone by and we are still missing you as much as the first ! We still think of you with a balloon launch in your memories! So still thinking of you always Love Dad
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2015
Another year has went by and still thinking of you and wondering what could of been done different 7 years ago !!! Still on my mind and missing you lots of love dad !!!
Posted by William Goodknight on May 21, 2015
Happy Birthday another year gone by and still thinking about you and still wishing you were here !!! There is so many crazy things that goes on everyday ! Still thinking of you everyday !!!lots of love.
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on May 13, 2015
TOMMY,
TWO DAYS AGO A FRIEND OF MINE WAS SHOOT AND I automatically THOUGHT OF YOU.... IT GOES THROUGH MY MIND AS IF IT WAS YESTERDAY. I NEVER STOP WONDERING WHY OR WISHING THINGS.WAS DIFFERENT. A GIRL CAN DREAM. YOUR BIRTHDAY IS 1 week away i cant way it gives me a little peace has i watch the ballons fade away in the sky.... Till next week big brother. Love ya to the angels and beyond....
         XOXO LACEY MAY
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on April 20, 2015
Tommy, I want you to know not a day goes by that your on my mind. My girls never got the chance to meet you and they love your memory. When Regan and KyKy get on the swings they say push me high to Uncle Tommy. I wish you was here,I always say what if. It's just not the same without Mr.No it all. LMAO Anyway watch over us. Ooh one more thing visit Mommy and Daddy in their dreams. Love ya always
Lacey May
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on March 6, 2015
Tommy, 
I miss you so freaking much, life's been a little crazy lately but no matter how crazy my day was or how good, I still sit back and thank of you. You. Your memory makes me smile, your lost makes me cry. I love you always bubby and I wish you was here.
  Love always, Lacey May
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on December 26, 2014
Yesterday was crazy so I didn't have time But I spoke to your picture aloud with a Merry Christmas plus I put you in front of the TV with a bowl pack to watch a Christmas story. I get told I'm a Lil weird but the way i see it you can still hear and see me even know I can't you. These last couple weeks I've cried every night because I'm missing you. Hell my girls miss you and they only know you as a story I tell and a picture i hang but I will never let anyone forget. I love my brother friend and angel always.   
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on December 12, 2014
I sure do miss ya but I'm sure you figured that out since I talk to your pictures more then I do my friends. Hell my two furls talk to you as if they knew you not just the memories I tell them. Almost Christmas I hope you fly low to spend it with us. Keep an eye on Mommy some days its like it just happened yesterday for her. We love you Tommy and we miss you daily.
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2014
It's been 6 years and we all still love and miss you! And always thinking of you everyday!
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on June 6, 2014
I can never replace you and I'd never would have drove away without you them could have been seconds that saved you. It's never got better I just learned to deal. You was my brother now your my angel. I love you Tommy Goodnight always and forever.
Posted by Shauna Furrow on May 21, 2014
Happy 27th Birthday in Heaven my beautiful brother, love and miss you always!
Posted by William Goodknight on May 21, 2014
Happy Birthday we love and miss you always Love Dad.
Posted by Jenna Bloxam on May 21, 2014
Happy birthday love:) I miss u so much!! No matter where my life takes me, you will always be my #1. You will always be in my heart & on my mind. Forever yours, Babygirl
Posted by Denise Goodknight on May 21, 2014
Happy Birthday my beautiful baby boy I still miss you everyday and the pain of losing you never goes away and today I am remembering your birth as though it was yesterday and your death just the same way. You were taken from us way to soon. I sure hope it's beautiful where you are and I hope you know how very much I miss you and not just today but every day, you are forever in my heart. Love you always my angel Mom
Posted by Lacey Goodknight on May 21, 2014
Happy birthday Tommy. I love and miss you much. I got me a sparks and a blunt of kush so we can blow together. I send your ball on up with some kush. I never stop thinking about you nor do the kids. We all love you. You got your birthday wish mikey ass is in jail. Love always your Lil sis Lacey
Posted by Faith Furrow on May 21, 2014
Tommy, I hope your birthday was amazing today. You are in a better place. I have been thinking about you a ton lately. I love and miss you a hella lot, bro ❤❤❤

Leave a Tribute

 
Recent Tributes
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2019
Thinking of you a s I often due just watching the years go by and wishing things was different!!! Still missing you everyday and thinking about you,lots of love Dad...
Posted by William Goodknight on May 21, 2019
Another birthday is here and just want you to know everyone is still thinking of you and misses you.Many years have passed but you are remembered e everyday throughout the year!!!
Posted by William Goodknight on December 8, 2018
It is another year gone by and still thinking of you.Alot of changes has taken place but you are missed by everyone everyday!!! You will always be loved and missed.
Recent stories

Letters to Tommy

Shared by Shauna Furrow on February 15, 2011

Below is a series of letters written by me (Shauna) and others to Tommy after his death.  I guess I decided to share these letters because I want people who hurt other people or people who have been through what our family has been through to understand, when you hurt someone or you lose someone, their story doesnt end with just them.  They have families who live on and who grieve and who have to learn to live with a loss.  I have shared my writtings in my personal blog on my page also but this is Tommys personal space and I just want to share our journeys through life and how we cope each day with everyone.  The letters are in order from the time of his death until recently.  As you can see on his page in his comments area we think about and write to him daily so feel free to send him messages as well and remember that death and grieving doesnt end at the funeral.  The family lives it everyday especially when it comes so unexpectedly!
 
December 13, 2008 - Saturday 
Monday Dec 8th changed my life and the lives of my family forever.  My baby brother lost his life to something that could have been prevented.. murder.   There are lots of stories going around of what happened to lead up to the incident and I don't know all the details and the truth is I dont care. The only reliable source who knows the truth is Tommy and he isn't here to tell us.  All I know and care about is that my brother is gone.  None of us even got to say goodbye to him. The hours leading up to the police detectives calling and officially identifying Tommy were the longest hours of my life.  The car ride to an from the hospital were the longest 40 minute car rides I have ever taken.  Its been 4 days.  Every day for me is harder than the day before and I know the hardest day is yet to come.  The first day your kind of just there, everything around you feels like your in a dream, just exhausted and praying that you wake up and everything will be ok.  Then tomorrow comes and you realize its not a dream and nothing is the same.   Hes just gone.  I'm never going to see his face again or hear his voice or watch him play with his nieces an nephews again.  Yesterday was so far was the hardest.  We had to go to the funeral home to make arrangements.  I was sitting there and just couldn't believe and never imagined laying my brother to rest.  He was supposed to there when we buried our parents and he was supposed to be there when they buried me.  It just doesn't make sense.  I can feel my heart breaking, literally physically breaking.  It breaks for our (my) loss and it breaks for my parents pain and I cant even imagine how Jenna feels.  Its so hard to understand and comprehend it.  The hardest times come when I am alone and when its quiet and I actually have time to think.  In the car, or the bath tub, laying in bed, washing the laundry and even yesterday in the grocery store. I cant stand to hear the phone ring, my heart stops every time it does and I cant stand watching the news.  I know that God has a plan for everybody and that he is in a better place.  And it may sound selfish but we just needed more time with him, he needed more time to live his life and start a family and become all the things he wanted to be.  21 years is such a short time, at 21 your just beginning to start the journey of finding yourself and creating yourself and shaping your life.  My thoughts are so scattered and I really cant even think straight.  There so many things I want to say and I have so many mixed emotions.   The one thing I learned is you cant take life for granted.  Everyday is a gift a new day and you better live and live it wisely because it might just be your last.  It can be taken away from you in a split second without any warning.  I think that is the hardest part of all this for me, is that we had no warning, its so unexpected.  You know, its not like with a disease or sickness where even though you don't know the exact day an time your giving a prognosis and you know that you better live your life to the fullest and you better say what it is you have to say and you make sure they know they were loved and are loved.   I cant even tell you the last time I said I love you to my brother or if I ever did, I cant remember the last time I hugged him, and so all I can do is hope that he knew and live with the guilt of having not done it when he was alive and here to hear it.  I did and I do love him with all my heart.  You kind of build of special bond when your 11 year old brother checks the bed by sniffing the bed when your going into labor thinking your water broke and the Dr insists you check to make sure it isn't pee, lol. (Oh gosh, I just laughed for the first time in days) He was so funny and he had stories for days.  He had a strong exterior very much bull headed (I think that runs in the family) but he had the heart of gold and he was not afraid to wear his heart on his sleeve.  The boy could talk for days,  if you called to talk to him for even a second about something small an quick you better have made time to talk for a full on hour or more, because he had things to say, lol.   I cant believe hes gone, hes just gone....  I could ramble on, and on I really could because I just need to get it all out but for now, I just want to say, everyday is a lesson and in this week, I have learned a few things, life is short, and leaves you with many questions.  Tomorrow isn't guaranteed, you don't come to earth knowing of when your time is going to be up, it isn't written on your birth certificate and there isn't a book with a list of dates.  So make sure everyday you tell all your loved ones you love them.  I sat my kids down and I made sure that they know I plan to tell them I love them everyday damn day for the rest of their lives but if there is a day when I dont, I want them to know I love them everyday of my life.  I want them to know when I leave this earth or when they do they were loved.  I dont want to be left or leave them wondering were they loved, and did they know how much.   I love you Tommy, and I only hope you knew that too!  Until next time....... 
December 14, 2008 - Sunday 
 


Dear Tommy,
It's been 5 days since you passed away.  I think about you every day and I miss you more than you can know.  My heart breaks every time I think of you. Every one is a mess. I have never seen our parents so distraught especially your (our) dad.  I know he is so used to being in control and being the one to handle everything, that its even harder for him.  It gives me some peace to know that at least your in a much better place than any of us could be right now.  But I just wish we could have had more time with you, that we could have at least said goodbye to you.  I was finally able to laugh out loud yesterday when I was writing about you in my blog.  Oh some of the memories we had.   So, somethings be on my mind since you left and its leaving me with a lot of guilt.  I cant remember the last time I hugged you or even said I love you to you.. did you know I loved you?  Because I do, did and always will with all my heart love you.   I want you to know that were all taken care of Jenna too.  We love her as our family and because we know you would never want anything less were going to make sure she knows she will always be a part of our family.  The other day at the funeral home when we went to make your arrangements, I wanted so badly to hug her but I couldn't, I just couldn't because I didn't want to break down.  I want to be the strong one now.  But I did tell her I love her, and I meant it.   Its going to be so hard tomorrow bub, do you know that?  Tomorrow were saying our final goodbyes to you.  You should know you have so many people who loved you and cared about you more than I think you could have ever fathomed.  You would not believe the out pour of support, really.  I just thought you should know.  I hope that you will be there tomorrow watching all of us finding comfort in knowing you were loved.  Its a shame though that it takes tragedy to bring people together but I guess in doing so you find out who matters, who doesn't, and who never will.  Well I have lots to do in preparation for tomorrow, but I love you and I just again wanted you to know.
Until we meet again,
I love you,
Shauna  


December 18, 2008 - Thursday 
Ten days has passed since we lost my little brother.  I am trying so hard to get into the Christmas spirit for two reasons one being my kids, they deserve to be happy and they just dont quite yet grasp the meaning of death and how devastating it is, an two because Christmas was Tommy's favorite, he would want us to be happy and celebrating the holidays.  I just cant though.  Its so hard.  I have tried to look so hard at all the things there are to be happy and thankful for but losing him has far over shadowed them all.  I did manage to get my tree up but it wasn't done with the love an perfection it usually is.  To me its just kinda there.  Just right now I have no vision.  I am so sad.  I just cant understand why... why my brother, why right now..!?!  I know it was obviously his time to go and God has a plan for him but what?  What is he needed for so bad up there that he had to leave us now?  Why, why, why?  I have questions and I WANT answers, but who do you look to for the answers?  Do I look inside myself an find the answers there, do I look to God an hope he sends me a sign, I mean where do I turn?  I just want to be able to be happy again and I want to know that the sun will shine sooner rather than later.  The gloom cast over me, is heavy and no matter how much I feel like things are getting back to normal, in the darkest of night, when all is quiet, I think and I remember that he is really gone and gloom hangs over me again.  I never thought I could be this devastated, I can only imagine how devastating it is for my parents with him being their son, our children are supposed to out live us.   Just thinking about losing one of my children and trying to imagine how my parents feel my heart aches.   Its an awful feeling.  I know now that I have to cherish all the time I have with my kids, because their tomorrow an my tomorrow isn't promised.  I guess I have always known that but times like this makes you realize you really shouldn't take life for granted, it goes as quickly as it comes.  I am beginning to ramble.. so for now kiss your loved ones, tell them you love them an until next time....
January 2, 2009 - Friday 
 


Dear Tommy,
It's me again. Writing to you an/or about you has gotten me through this thing more than anyone could know. I have thought about you everyday since you left us. Some days are better than others but tonight since the kids have begun to settle down and Mark is sleeping everyone is gone and all is quiet, it has hit me hard. That's usually when I think about you the most. I am so sad right now. I am sad that your gone, I am sad that everyone is hurting.  Because I am hurting I am not much help in being a comfort even though I am not so good at showing my feelings. I dont think anyone but you knows how much I am hurting because I never cry in front of anyone. And I am sorry for that but, I need to be the strong one. I have always been good at being strong, and I have never been good at being the one who needs someone.  I thrive off of being strong and in control, cause that's what comes with the control freak territory.
So its finally 2009. It hasn't quite been a month since you passed away, but Christmas has passed and now its New Years day. I am sure seeing as how your watching over us you know we (Mark an I) spent last night with Lacey an lil Mark and Jenna. With everything that has happened, we thought it would be comforting to spend time with family at home.  Actually it was Marks idea. He's been really great through this whole thing. I dont even think he knows how much he has helped me through this. And I know that it he is hurting just as much as the rest of us. You have been family to him for 14 years.  He just wants to make sure that were all okay. It was really hard on Jenna last night. She's strong though, stronger than I am sure she knows. You never know your strengths until your put to the test and I truly believe God only gives us as much as he thinks we can handle. I promise Jenna is going to be alright, and were all here to help her. She and I had some bonding time after everyone went to bed last night, we talked about lots. I felt comfort in talking to her and reminiscing about fun times we all had together and memories I was able to share with her about some of our fun times or funny times from when were younger, lol. She knew most of them but at least we were able to smile. I wish you could have been here last night celebrating with us, well if you called our night celebrating. I know you were here in spirit though. Was that you turning the lights up an down and not letting Jenna sleep last night?
Before I go I just want to tell you that I miss you. We didn't talk everyday or see each other all the time but just knowing that I cant see you or call you up whenever I want breaks my heart. I have learned a lot of life lessons losing you. Not taking your family for granted has been one of the biggest ones. Each time we spend time with our families we need to spend it to the fullest, make it quality time and make it count because it only takes one day, one hour, one minute to lose someone you love. Sometimes you dont even have a warning, one night your phone rings and your life changes forever. That's what happened to us. And it doesn't matter what type of relationship you have with that person, it changes you. Sometimes its little ways and sometimes its major life changes, but it always has an effect. Its sad it takes losing a person to realize what it means to be a family. I am going to go for now, but not forever, and until the next time, every time I think about you, I am going to think about the happy times, and I am going to smile. You weren't just somebody's brother you were OUR brother! I ♥ you an miss you much, see you in my dreams.
Until next time,
Shauna


Saturday, January 10, 2009 
 

Dear Bubby
 
Its Lacey yea that right I never shut up, do I?? I just cant come to bring myself to believe that one day you was there & the same night you was gone. I have so many question that have no answers and some may never be answered till you open up the gates for me. First I want to say I love & miss you so much I still wait for you to walk done the stairs, I can remember you falling down them just a few weeks before you died & you were saying Sis I thought I could make it over the gate I always do & I said to you Bub you cant do the same things drunk, we just laughed. Second I want to talk about Ashton boy does he miss the hell out of you, you know he always looked up to you & your name was always in his month. He thinks that you cant found him although in the same sentence he said My Uncle Tommy is an Angel & way in the sky on the moon. He doesn't understand you gone but he does understand that you haven't been around. It breaks my heart to hear him talk about you everyday, Ashton will never forget you & he wont let you be forgotten. Now on to Mom & Dad, they are a mess, I know everyone is upset that your gone but I can only imagine how they feel sense you where their son, I know Id go crazy if something happened to Ashton, it breaks my heart that you gone but we all know Daddy is my world, my mister Ill stand by you even if your wrong, he gives me my wants & needs, he's my GPS, You know my everything & seeing him cry its like some body stumps on my heart every time I look in his eyes. Last but no least Jenna, shes lost without you but I keep he close & I'm going to keep her in my left packet on till she's ready, I'm doing all I can for her & I'm going to keep her in Ashton's live as Aunt Jenna. He already lost his hero I wont let him lose his love too. I just want you to know that I'm doing all I can for our family you know me I'm not into crying Ill break the sadness with my silly personality. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about you, listening to music makes me sad so I just leave the radio off, I have some of your cloths, I where them with pride. I just want you to know I love you & wish you was here with me but I wont every get that so Looks like your gonna be in heaven achieved with me seeming how I always find myself talking to you, I don't know if you can hear me but I hope so if not Ill keep talking to myself. R.I.P. Tommy I love you