No matter what or when I needed you, you were always there. You were there when I was a little girl in Perote, Alabama. But because you had previously left home to be on your own and stayed so long, by the time you returned to visit, I no longer knew who you were. And, I was a little bit scared of you. I'm sorry about that.
But we made up for those lost years. And we became inseparable. I will cherish always, the fishing trips that we took. And the way you patiently waited for me to catch as many fish as I wanted to because they were biting so well, even when others were demanding that you "come on let's go." I thank you for that.
When I was married, and I needed your support, and or advice, you stepped up to the plate and handled the situations for me, and caused the "devil" to step aside and leave me alone. I thank you for that.
During the (5) five years that you lived with the rest of the family and me those were the best years of my life. You showed me that you were truly a wonderful, kind, caring and patient brother. You helped me with our sister, and with my two little children (our great grand niece and nephew.) They loved you, and still do, love their "Uncle Buck." When I needed you, you were there.
Our daily walks were so necessary to both of us as we picked up lost change along the way, casually and slowly walking with no clear direction in mind. We just followed our hearts and ended up wherever we wanted to. I enjoyed our periodic stops along the way to laugh or to tell a joke. Or to maybe buy a lottery ticket or two at one of the corner stores. I remember how your bird "Q" would always acknowledge us when we would get back bak hom by calling out "Uncle Buck."
And then you moved back to Alabama to live the life that you wanted to live - and I am so glad that you got the chance to do exactly that. Each time I spoke with you on the phone, and you know that was nearly every day, you always told me about how happy and peaceful you were. And how glad that you had made that move. And that made me happy.
When you told me of your situation this past February of 2015, you told me with the same expression, grace and dignity that you that you would have told me about anything else. And because of the way that you told me, evn though it tore through me, I tried to handle it just like you - my big brother.
You told me not to worry. And you told me to tell everyone else not to worry as well. I told some. Some will read this and know, And some, I will tell by and by. I'm trying to do as you told me to do, and to act as you told me to act, because as far as I know, you have never told me anything wrong. This is so much harder to do, thouh, my dear brother. But "I will stay steady in the boat", remember every word you told me, and I know, just like you told me, A change is gone come and everything will be all right.
Your heavenly journey is the beginning of that change. I will keep "my good eye" open, and look "straight ahead." Thank you for allowing me to travel with you to the end of your journey on the earth. You were always there for me. And I tried to be there for you the best way that I could be. I pray that what ever I said and did really did help you through your transistion.
I wear my heart close to me with pride as I told you I would. I will continue to wear it close so that it will act as a surrogate of your heart and I will imagine that it beats for you, and that the words that are incribed on the back will speak for you, and it will continue to keep your spirit close to me.
I love you my brother, Buck. I will always be looking for you in various places at various times until we meet again.
Love your baby sister, Penny
