This is a speech that I gave in honor of Aaron when the National 9/11 Flag came to Eagle Grove on it's first trip in 2009. The National 9/11 Flag visited Eagle Grove, Iowa twice in honor of Aaron. Once in 2009 and then on February 24, 2011 in honor of Aaron's 17th birthday.

Follow the Flag speech

Tonight we are here to honor and remember all of the men, women, and children who died during the 9/11/2001 tragedy as well as to remember Ben, Josh, Sam and Aaron who did not survive the tornado at the Little Sioux Scout Ranch on 6/11/2008.

Most people who have talked to us since we have lost Aaron have said “death is a part of life”. Yes, death is a part of life, but when the death is that of a child or a tragedy such as 9/11, it is not a normal part of life.

Ben, Josh and Sam went to the leadership camp at Little Sioux to learn from Aaron and other staff members about being responsible, kind, caring citizens, and how to be a positive role model in the community. As parents, we never thought our boys would step into that camp, and never step back out. We were not prepared to let our boys go.

On June 11, 2008, our boys met God face to face. The place where life as we knew it ended. It was the end of the kisses and hugs and the memories we were making with our sons. It was the end of our son’s futures and our futures with them. We never thought we would have to survive each day without them.

I am sure that the men and women who went to work at the World Trade Center on 9/11 did not expect to never get to see their family members again. The firefighters, first responders, and rescue workers who went into the Twin Towers to rescue and evacuate innocent people did not think twice about possibly never coming back out of the towers.

Our local firefighters, EMT’s, first responders, police and sheriff personell put their lives on the line for our safety every day. They have, I’m sure, witnessed some horrible tragedies during their years of service. Yet, everyday they continue to serve our community knowing that a tragedy can happen at any time.

While at the Little Sioux Scout Ranch re-opening, I had the opportunity to visit with the first responders who were at the camp that night. When I would introduce myself as Aaron’s mom and thank them for responding and helping the boys, most of them would begin to cry and tell me that they wish they could have done more for Aaron, Ben, Josh, and Sam. They carry that with them everyday. You couldn’t have asked for more caring people to respond. I know that they did absolutely everything they could, not only for our 4 boys, but for all the scouts there that night.

In July of 2008 we had the opportunity to visit with President Bush in the oval office while in Washington D.C. The President spoke with us about our grief and he confirmed our belief that we cannot always control what happens around or to us, but we can control how we react. We can help the world heal with us and that is what we choose to do. It is what our sons would want us to do.

In four short years, Aaron touched so many lives in this community with his kindness, caring, compassion, and sharing of his time and talents. We will never understand why God needed to take Aaron so soon. There are so many families in this community who have had to cope with the pain and unanswered questions of losing a child, and unfortunately there will always be tragedies. I want these families to know that when I speak about Aaron, I also remember your child, know your emptiness, and feel your pain.

Every child is a gift.

For all the children and young adults, I ask you to take some time to spend with your parents. Appreciate the time you can share with them. To the parents, take time for your children. Always let them know when you are proud of them. It is important for a child to hear those words. Family should be the most important thing in your day. Everything else can wait.

I would like to thank everyone for their thoughts, prayers, and support over this past 15 months. It is a journey in which we never thought we would have to take.

Please continue to pray for the safety of our firefighters, rescue workers, first responders, and law enforcement for they are also someone’s husband, wife, father, mother, son, or daughter.

I would like to share with you a verse that I say to Aaron everyday:

I thought of you with love today,

But that is nothing new

I thought about you yesterday,

And days before that too.

I think of you in silence,

I often speak your name.

All I have are memories,

And your picture in a frame.

Your memory is my keepsake,

With which I’ll never part.

God has you in His keeping,

I have you in my heart.

Finally, while shopping one day I found a plaque that had a quote on it from Henry Ward Beecher which said, ”Every charitable act is a stepping stone toward Heaven” I think Aaron just walked a little too fast for me.

I thought I would take a few moments to share with you a little bit about our son Aaron. I hope you don’t mind that I included a few funny stories about Aaron because it is the funny stories that get us through the tough times. 

As Aaron’s mom, I am often asked what we did to raise such a nice young man. I cannot really answer that question other than saying we did the best we could as parents and hoped that Aaron would take the best from our parenting skills and not the worst, because we all make mistakes in parenting. 

From little on, Aaron was a very busy child. He really never wanted to sleep in fear he would miss something. He was busy from the time he got up until the time he would finally give in to sleep every night. Getting Aaron to bed was always a struggle. He was a very inquisitive child. 

He had lots of questions about everything. He wanted to know how things worked and why they were made. I remember when he was about six years old and we had an old VCR that no longer worked. We were going to put it in the trash. The next thing I see is this VCR sitting outside on the picnic table with a bucket full of tools and Aaron sitting on the table next to it taking that thing apart. He spent a week outside every day after school taking every nut, bolt, and screw out of the VCR. (Of course after that I had to guard all of my kitchen appliances as he thought he could take apart anything that could plug into the wall.)

People ask me if Aaron was every naughty. Well, all I can say is that Aaron was a typical boy. When Aaron was four years old he colored his pet cat Rusty blue with sidewalk chalk---no really--the entire cat. And then there was the time in second grade when he shot a rubber band in class and hit his teacher in the back of the head and wouldn’t admit that he did it so the entire class ended up staying after school until 4pm., and the time that he decided to take care of my weeding problem in my flower garden and plant grass seed in all the bare spots.…..and I am sure there were many times camping with the Boy Scouts from Humboldt that he showed his “true” colors as well, such as helping to catch a skunk in a live trap at summer camp…..need I say more.

Aaron excelled in school academically, however, getting him to do his homework and not lose it from home to school was always a challenge. Aaron wasn’t a fan of day-to-day homework, but he loved the big projects that were assigned. The teacher would always give them a list of suggestions of things to do. For example: they needed to do a project on the Civil War. Suggestions the teacher gave were:

A. pretend you are a soldier and write a letter home

B. draw a map of the territory

C. draw a picture of a soldier

and then there was always that dreaded option at the bottom of the page that would say, “or other project of your choice approved by the teacher”….. You’ll never guess which one Aaron ALWAYS chose; “other project approved by teacher”. Which usually meant a whole lot more creativity than drawing a map or writing a letter…..

On the Civil War Project: Aaron decided to make a guitar out of a cigar box and piece of wood as the soldiers did when then would empty a cigar box at camp……Do you know how hard it is to find a wooden cigar box today? ….. And then there was the project on the Industrial Revolution with the list of choices from the teacher. Again Aaron picked “other project approved by teacher”. I now have a contraption in my garage made out of PVC pipe, an air valve, and a bike tire pump that can shoot a newspaper across the neighborhood.

Aaron was also very creative. Four years ago today we moved to Eagle Grove, Iowa from Nebraska. Aaron explored the neighborhood while we unloaded boxes. Later in the day Aaron and I took a break and walked around the neighborhood so he could show me the neighborhood park. Aaron was excited because there was a tennis court. As we were walking, I noticed these hand-written signs taped on all the trees and posts with our new phone number on them. I asked Aaron about it and he said he put them there because he was going to give tennis lessons for 50 cents---and “oh, yeah, by the way mom, I need to get a tennis racket…….

Aaron was born with a lot of good qualities. From the time he was very small he always seemed to have a big heart and wanted to make everyone around him happy and feel welcome. Aaron, as little as he was, would always stick up for kids who were being picked on, be a friend to someone who needed a friend, and was always very respectful to adults.

We tried to teach Aaron that you should treat others the way you would like to be treated. Aaron wasn’t influenced by the crowd all the time. He seemed to make up his mind on what he wanted to do. If it was something he felt was right in his heart, then he would do it no matter what others thought. To go with that, Aaron had very supportive friends that stood behind what he wanted to do even if they didn’t participate, they applauded his efforts.

Aaron was never ashamed to spend time with his parents. What a gift that was to us. He loved going places with us and doing things together. Aaron and I would go to the Grotto in West Bend, Iowa a lot. We would also go out for pie or ice cream and talk about our day at school. We also never missed a good antique shop or garage sale. Aaron and his dad would play catch, ride bikes, or play board games. They also liked to go fishing, but never seemed to catch any fish. We always made time every summer to go on a family vacation together.

Aaron was proud to be a boy scout. Even though there were no other scouts in Eagle Grove, or an active scout troop for that matter, when we moved there four years ago, Aaron still wanted to continue his scouting. We found a good troop in Humboldt, Iowa. The scouts in Troop 108 immediately accepted Aaron and made him feel welcome. He would never miss a camp out. He was their favorite cook. He could cook just about anything in a Dutch oven. He loved to cook at home as well. Everything from scratch. Nothing from a box.

Aaron enjoyed music. He played the piano, the guitar, and the flute. He also sang and performed in musicals such as “Cinderella”, “The King and I”, and “The Wizard of Oz”. He sang in the church choir and was the first person to sing the National Anthem in the new gymnasium in Eagle Grove for a varsity Volleyball game.

Aaron loved to collect Elvis memorabilia, matchbox cars, stuffed animals, Wizard of Oz memorabilia, and old record albums. He loved animals. Aaron had a dog, cat, rabbit, guinea pig and fish.

Some of the projects Aaron did were:

Pillowcases for patients--making close to 400 pillowcases for kids in hospitals

Orgami folded napkins and made table decorations for the senior citizen center in Eagle Grove

Helped with the summer reading program at the Eagle Grove Library

Altar-served nearly every Sunday at Sacred Heart Catholic Church

Made wind spinners to sell to make money to buy fabric for his pillowcase project

He dressed up as Santa Claus every year and went to the nursing home in Eagle Grove as a surprise to the residents. He and his friend Colby would also sing at the nursing home a few times a year.

Made tie blankets out of fleece for the Wright County Humane Society.

Always was doing random acts of kindness for teachers or neighbors but wouldn’t let anyone know he was doing them--which I guess would include decorated Mrs. Stephas‘ classroom in “Nebraska cornhusker colors.

As you can see, Aaron had a very busy life full of character for only being here for 14 years. As you can imaging how empty our days feel without having Aaron with us. God had a purpose for Aaron. I think that purpose was to show all of us how to become better people. Aaron did the right things because he wanted to. He chose to make others happy and in return received more joy than we could ever hope for.

Aaron was fulfilling one of his dreams as a leader at the National Leadership Training Camp at Little Sioux in June of 2008. He was an exceptional leader to his patrol. He and his co-leader Rob protected all of their patrol members by getting them to safety. All of Aaron and Rob’s patrol survived the tornado. Aaron gave all to protect the boys he was entrusted with… and for that we can only say Thank you Aaron for your kindness, caring, giving, and unconditional love.

Aaron was truly making the world a better place because he was here.