November 12, 2016
November 12, 2016
Dear Mom,me and charlie are with Martha....on a rainy ,friday night! and trying to call you 3 times.remembering that you aren't here.... i can not say you will be here any minute.with the night wind blowing,I said "hope you are holding the wheel strong " realizing that I won't see anymore....god,...i'm still thinking youare alive! you are alive up in heaven. beautiful,...lovely,happy you. I miss your hands playing the piano,soft sweet voice teaching me the keys.for a minute, i was 3 years old again.you made me safe with you and your piano in your arms....i started to cry....with flashbacks of my journey coming home to you,but, instead of me.....you were called back to heavens truck run. and for almost a full month,you were trying to delay leaving . but you coming back home as well....on sunday, febuary 21,2016. at 1:23 pm. on your grandson,Leeland's 5th birthday.... I tried so hard to make it home to you but,...you had to go to paradise.I could't take it. i felt like 4 again on the 1st day of school .and you were walking away, and vainish... you weren't suppose to leave! Ihappily we could trade places just have you here on earth a little longer.and for the next 7 months after your passing,Charlie & i were blessed to see marlon and CJ , hearing them call us mom and dad. for the last 5 years of your life you were given time to be with them.what a wonderful mother you were to be blessed with the boys!!! god, I love you so much! thank you ! I knew you had them but couldn't tell me . i said to you that if anything should happen, do whatever you have to do to be in their lives...even if you couldn't tell charlie and I.as much as we love our children,if you were meant to be in their lives and not tell us...we understand. ...they had their grammy gail. some folks would be upset, for you to make the hardest choices and was rewarded...I felt my babies with you in my dreams beiliving that it was true....my mom, Gail Guest, is the champ. and from the bottom of your son in law & daughterwe love you . now, in your beautful, woods of Oregon ,we are home..everything you said was true.the people,the change in us,....and most times, seeing or hearing your voice.or looking at traffic, see you.driving ...hauling , more than cross country this time,along the highway rolling before shifting gears and rolling up the night sky.i wish that god would keep you me and our love ones together. one more banna bread, or see you giggle like crazy . or you dancing in my boots to the Gap band....I'm getting some photos of you so people can see you and in your wonderful glory .sometimes, life was very hard, even painful.but, you made it a lesson . other times,I taught you.ups and downs,you showed me that to live, you have to step outside the box. Hell.....we both did. we were together.miles apart , we we and always will be a team.you just had to do heavens job. I know that the Lord has a beautiful, angel convoy waiting to drive their haul home.charlie's grandfather Ed Gormon joined a few years before you .you would LOVE him! he was a hansome man,giving,and loving like you.the last few weeks we had seen 2 semis, neck to neck passing thru town.it does make me smile.....and that big daddy is taking great care of you.a few hours later, my friend asked if i had said thank you? i said no and charlie and two more friends of ours heard a laugh... then someone saying i love you but in a lady's voice with music in the background..but nothing was on. then, the lights dimmed and realized you had come back to make a connection.you mom made my day and night to check on me. the best surprize of all.can't wait until the next timeyou come home....I love you
