- 52 years old
- Date of birth: Feb 8, 1963
- Date of passing: Jan 7, 2016
|Let the memory of Timothy be with us forever|
"Good Morning my love, we are starting to get settled in our new home. Try as I may I can not get or keep you out of my mind. Everyone I meet I compare to you and of course they can not even start to meet up to you. I miss you so much and love you with my whole heart. As you would say time and time again I need you right by my side at all times. That is how I feel about you my love. I know you are here with me but I wish you were here where I could touch you, hold you, and feel you hold me once again. As I sit on the front porch every morning drinking my first cup of coffee I can almost see you sitting there with me. You would so love this place my love. It is so still and peaceful. We will be holding an open house/ house warning party soon and am busy trying to get as many things put away and up as possible. Your shaving brush and other things you loved so much is sitting on the shelf in the bathroom. Having these little things of your around seem to give me a sense of comfort and almost like you are still here. I love you so Tim and miss you so much. Until we meet again my love you will be in my heart and on my mind."
"Well, it is just past midnight & what should have been our 15th anniversary has just ended. You were on my mind alot thru out the day. I miss you & what we once had."
"It may seem odd that Mother's Day brings you so much to mind & makes the void of your being gone so much bigger. We had no children together. But not a single mother's day passed since we met that you didn't tell me what a wonderful mother you thought I'd have been & expressed regret we met too late to have a family together. But we had all our various 4 legged "children" & you made sure I always got cards & gifts from them. Even when you were traveling, there were e-cards & git's when you ca me home. Always at least 4 - one from each type of critter. It always made me feel so loved & appreciated for holding down the fort whole you were working for our future.
Last week I heard baby birds cheeping in the birdhouse you gave me from our kids last year for Mother's Day. It made me laugh cos you said you only got it cos it's cute but that nothing would probably use it. But it also made me sad - I sooo wished you were here so i could show them to you!
Most of our kids are with you now. Another reason this year hurts so badly. But I am grateful we had the years together with them all. And for the ones still here.
But mostly I am thankful you brought Adam into my life. You did give me a 2 legged kid - not my blood, but I love him just the same. He has your eyes, & every time I see them I'm reminded of all the qualities I loved in you. But I also love him for the young man he is in his own right.
And for that, & so much more, I will always love & miss you."
"Well my love it is May 4, 2016 and here we still are missing you. I know life will go on as it must but life without you right here by my side will be forever changed. That is what you always said to me. I need you right here by my side at all times. I love you Tim, yesterday, today and all of my tomorrows. I miss you more than words can ever say."
"well my love it has been far to many days you have been gone from this earth and I just miss you more and more as each day passes. I may not have been your first love but I was your last love and for that I will always be thankful. you told everyone you had never been happier in your entire life and I am pleased I made your last days filled with love and joy. I only wish like you your self said why couldn't we have met years before. Well honey the short time we had together was more than many others have in a life time together. the love and closeness we shared will live in my heart until we are together once more. I love you Tim. I miss you more than words can ever express."
"Well Sweetheart, it's Valentine's again. You have been in my heart and mind all day. I saw the gifts you gave me last year and smiled and felt loved. This is the day dedictated to romantic love. We shared 15. Each was memorable. I will always be grateful that you taught me Any day can feel like Valentine's when you believe you "mean the world" to the one you love. I know what Valentine's meant to you. You knew what it meant to me. We Both knew where that would lead. I still miss us. I always will. Enough said."
"Happy Valentines day my love. You are with the Lord who Himself has said how important love is. Today as we celebrate a day set aside for love you will be enjoying it with the One who thinks it is one of the most important things for us to do and who has loved you all of your to short of a life. Just wanted to stop by to wish you a happy one. God Bless you honey."
"Happy Birthday my Love, I know we did not get to spend birthdays together but the time we did have together was enough to give me a life time of memories. Joshua, Chris, Joey, Ann and I set balloon's up to you for your Birthday tonight. We had white ones for the angles and lit up ones so you would have no trouble finding them, We did not have near enough time to make all the memories I would have liked to have made but the time we shared can never be taken from us. We shared a love that can never be be explained away. I love you Tim and will hold you in my heart forever.Happy Birthday my love."
"Remembering you with love on your birthday today and always.
I got to spend so many birthdays with you, wondering & planning things to do to make your day special, baking your favorite scotch cake, your favorite dinners, or going to Sam's Boat for long lazy lunch, or getting together with friends. And best of all being home and cuddling. Times I would pretend to forget your birthday (and you would pout) just so I could see your smile when I surprised you. Hours i spent trying to find the perfect cards. All the times I asked what you wanted me to get you & I always got the perfect answer: "just you". How I miss all we shared. I miss You."
"I have never known that being fatherless will also make me feel worthless, powerless, aimless and helpless. Dad, wherever you are now… I just want you to know that regardless of how much we have fought, argued and misunderstood each other, you still end up being my Dad. That is what my heart always knows… I miss you dad, happy birthday in heaven!"
"my love Tim, no words could ever tell how my heart hurts for you no longer being here with me. I still reach for you in the night and sometimes it feels like you are still here reaching for me. I miss you and your smile, your touch, your stories, the movies we always watched together. I miss sitting with you and cuddling every day and night. I miss you getting on me for driving to far over to the right when we went places. I miss going out for lunch and all of the funny things you always seemed to come up with. Every room in our home is filled with you my love. I can barely stand to stay in it. But leaving does no good as you always called or texed me if I was more than an hour out of the house so I wait for your call while I am driving. I have had to stop on my way so many times as my heart was breaking knowing I would never receive another call from you. I loved you with all of my heart Tim. You will forever live in my heart and I will hold you there until I can hold you in my arms once more. I don't know why the Lord would put you in my life to only take you back so quickly. I will always be thankful for the time we shared our lives together. I only wished we could have had the rest of our lives together. We had so many plans but they were cut way to short. I love you Tim and I know you truly loved me. Rest a while my love until we can be together once again."
Once I believed you could read my mind &see into my very heart & soul. I hope that was true & still is. If not, I hope these words reach you somehow. And so Sweetie, forgive me if I expound one last time.....
You were my best friend, lover, partner & confidant; my champion & my critic; the smile on my face & a pain in my "arse". We said there was no you or me, only "us" & "we". My belief in your love & our future together was my strength & sustained me when we were apart. You were my greatest joy, & finally my deepest sorrow.
This is the 2nd time I have felt the horrible pain of losing you. Life threw us curves. The oilfield is a demanding mistress & kept us apart when we needed each other most. Time apart took its toll. When you told me you wanted a new life without me, my world imploded. "We" had died, & I grieved over the loss of"us", & of you. To stop the pain, I tried to stop loving you. I buried all of the good memories behind a wall of anger. We fought as fiercely as we had loved. You said you changed your mind & wanted to stay. But hurtful words spoken in anger could not be unheard by either of us. Soon a house full of animosity was all we shared & divorce became the only option. You moved on. I told myself I had too. I had convinced myself I was getting good at being just me again. Until I saw you Thanksgiving & you wanted to share a beer like old times. I realized I hadn't moved on as much as I thought. Being "just me" around you was too new & still painful, so I shut you out & sent you away. I remember thinking "later, there is plenty of time for this later, when my feelings aren't so raw".
But we weren't given time. You left this world for a better one too soon. So again I mourn your loss. But this grief is different: just as deep, but more gentle. You took my anger with you when you passed. A void was left. The good memories & feelings I had suppressed came rushing in to fill it. And with them came forgiveness & gratitude for having shared even a portion of your life & love. Even with all the absences during our 15 years, you gave me as many memories to cherish as many couples share during a lifetime. I am blessed to have the family & friends you brought into my life, & all our 4 legged "children". It helps to think of you with so many of them now. You will remain alive & loved in the minds of those still here until we join you again.
You asked me last summer if I would shed a tear when you died. You doubted I would. In my pain & anger, I honestly didn't know. I wish I didn't know now, because I cry each day . And then I remember you happy, walking on "our" beach in Ababa at sunset, leaving footprints in the sand like those you left on my heart. And I smile past the tears.
I will never forget the way your smile could light up your face, the twinkle in your eyes, the warmth of your embrace, the simple pleasure of holding your hand, or the sound of your voice when you called me "Strange".
I loved you then, now & always.
I am glad we didn't miss the dance.
"I miss the stories Tim used to tell of his life in Africa and of all of the different countries he went to. I miss his smile and his laugh. He loved life and it was filled with adventure for him. I will be forever thankful he was a part of our lives even if it was for to brief a time. I love you Tim and miss you more than I can ever say."
"my love, we did not have near enough time together but you will remain in my heart forever. I love and miss you with all of my heart. I hope your family and I will be able to get closer and we will be able to comfort each other in the days ahead."
"Tim we had some great times together. Wished I could have a drink for you buddy,but as you know and loved I was on a oil rig today. I'm so thankful that you were able to come spend a week with us this fall. Joe the neighbor loved you he was sadden by you passing. Years have went by,but when ever we talked it was like yesturday. You will be missed my friend, Rip and have a drink with my mom."
"You left us way too soon!! Rest in peace!! So happy that your son is in our life now! We will celebrate your life today!"
"You will be missed Dad. RIP I love you lots"
"You will be missed Tim, I Love You."
Have a suggestion for us?