Diane Boyden Pesso, (1929 - 2016) - ForeverMissed.com Online Memorials

Have compassion for all, even the tiniest
life forms on the planet & seek out and celebrate (not fear) differences among people.

86 years old
Born on August 8, 1929 in Boston, Massachusetts, United States
Passed away on March 4, 2016 in Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts, United States

This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, Diane Pesso, 86, born on August 8, 1929 and passed away on March 4, 2016. We will remember her forever.

We will arrange a memorial service for sometime later in the year and will post the date and place when our plans firm up.

Diane Boyden Pesso, beloved wife of Albert Pesso and daughter of Martha L. Birchby and F. Wendell Boyden died of ALZ on Mar. 4, 2016 in Chestnut Hill, MA. Born Aug. 8, 1929 she leaves her husband, 3 daughters, Tana Pesso, Tasmin Pesso, and Tia Pesso Powell, and 4 grandchildren, Chris F. Edley III, Kyra Chu Pesso, Jono Pesso Chu, and Xoren Pesso Powell.

With her powerful intellect, compassion, and fiercely independent and creative mind she along with her husband created Pesso Boyden System Psychomotor (an interactive process that creates new body-based memories to heal emotional deficits of the past) in the early 1960's.

Diane began her career in the field of dance. As a young woman, she studied under the legendary modern choreographer, Jose Limon, and was a favorite of the renowned Creative Movement pioneer and teacher, Barbara Metler. In high school she ran her own dance studio. Winning numerous scholarships, she continued her dance education at Bennington College under Martha Hill, founder of Julliard's dance department.

Diane went on to teach dance at Wheaton, Emerson, and Boston University's Sargent colleges. In the 1950's she and her husband established a dance school in Quincy with 500 students which taught primarily modern dance, creative movement, and choreography to children and teenagers.

She was a PBSP therapist at McLean Hospital, the Director of Psychomotor Therapy at the New England Rehab Hospital (now Spaulding Rehabilitation) Pain Unit, had a private PBSP practice, and as Vice President of the Psychomotor Institute trained psychotherapists in PBSP certification programs in America and Europe.

In addition, as a dedicated utopian thinker Diane was years ahead of her time in her attempts in the late 1960's to create a multi age, race, creed, and income community that would have conserved land and have offered shared space for education, art, cooking, and other community activities.

A free spirit with a deeply compassionate wish to heal all the wounds of the world, Diane will be deeply missed by friends and family who remain inspired by her life's work and unique soul.

A memorial service will be held in late Spring.

Anyone kindly wishing to make a donation in Diane's memory and honor may do so here: http://gogetfunding.com/support-for-al-pessos-medical-recovery-expenses/

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March 6, 2016

My mother speaks at length here with incisive intelligence about PBSP's origins and tenets in the video “Frozen Emotions/ Gestolde Emoties,”a half hour documentary on PBSP by the Dutch television series, “Northern Light.” (1999). You can find it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q9bPozHEnJ0

Also featured are my father, Dr. Menno Witter, Professor of Neuroanatomy at Vrije University and Lowijs Perquin M.D., a certified PBSP Supervisor/Trainer and a psychiatrist on the faculty of the Psychiatry Department of Vrije University in Amsterdam.

March 6, 2016

We saw Diane once in Strolling Woods giving you a kiss at the beginning of the workshop. So we could know the love and the connectedness between you two. We presume that was one of the basic elements for creating this wonderful ideas which formed PBSP.
In our thoughts we are with you. We hope that your loved-ones can support you in this hard and sad times.
Baerbel and Guenter from Berlin

March 6, 2016

Dear Al,

We hereby offer you our sincere condolences on the death of Diane. We understood that she passed away without fear and pain; that is important and comforting. Saying goodbye to someone who has been at your side for more than half a century must be an enormous task for you. We wish you much comfort, dear love and warm support from family and friends surrounding you.

In our minds we are with you, with affection,

The board of the PBSP society in the Netherlands,

Maria Arens, Lot Julien, Fijke van Vliet, Wouter Wouters

March 6, 2016

My condoleance to the family of Diane and specially to you, Al. I only met Diane once on a PBSP symposion in the Netherlands. She was such a friendly lady and so close with Al. It must be heavy to let go this life. Hope you can believe that there is more...it gives some strength to go on. Diane will stay in all the memories she gave to you and i know they'll be strong enough to stay on forever.
A warm hug and big support.
I light a candle....
Jo Goemans, Pesso-therapist, Belgium-Europe

March 5, 2016

Such sadness, learning of Diane's death. I'm flooded with memories and a deepened realization of how important she was to me. When she came to do workshops at our Pesso group in the Twin Cities, I found her to be a role model which I needed of a strong, impassioned, opinionated, and just woman. She taught us so much that influenced my therapy practice ever since: the metaphor of shape/countershape; awareness of self-self interactions; naming, expressing, and valuing deep emotions; and always, always the primacy of the patient's needs in their healing. I came to Strolling Woods a few times, and I was always aware of Diane's being the one providing the holding environment.
I remember seeing Diane and Al dance at the Amsterdam conference; she could exude joy from deep inside. We've all lost a rich and creative soul, whose spirit lives on in her wide influence.

March 5, 2016

Dear Al and Family, I am so sorry to hear of Diane's passing. I recall the light of her being as she served as such a lovely and gracious hostess from my summers at Strolling Woods. Peace and blessings to you and sweet and easy passage to Diane. -Deb Antari

March 5, 2016

Thinking of the second family I had as a teen tonight. Diane you gave me my first job when I was 14, I worked for you and Al for the next 3 years and then a number of times throughout the years thereafter. You hired me as a cook for yours and Al's summer workshops at Strolling Woods and you knew I could do it even when I didn't know it in myself. It turned out to be what I still say to this day, were probably several of the best summers of my life. I learned a lot about myself and it was a pivotal point for me in my trust of people. I will remember you fondly. May you rest in peace and the dancer in your soul be free to sway the heavens.

March 5, 2016

When teaching PBSP here in Europe, Al always emphasized your essential contributions in creating this wonderful method. You have brought so much healing and growth to so many people all around the world. I bow to you in respect and gratitude.
"To know that even one life has breathed easier
because you have lived, this is to have succeeded!"

March 5, 2016

Dear Al, I am with you in my thoughts and prayers, with a deep gratitude for everything Diana brought to this world... with much Love Nada

March 5, 2016

At the PBSP Conference in Holland in 2009, when I first encountered Diane, I remember being profoundly struck by the huge appreciation and respect for Diane that pervaded the PBSP community, notwithstanding the fact that she had not been greatly active as a therapist or teacher for some time. Her contribution to the development of PBSP was enormous, and her support for Al's later work as a teacher and therapist during their time at Strolling Woods irreplaceable.

On the final evening, at the end-of-conference party, she and Al danced to the band, and we were all able to witness the grace and balance that would have marked her in her prime as a dancer.

As a member of that community I remain deeply greatful for Diane's life.

March 5, 2016

Dear Al,

Only good memories from Diane, warm hugs and keep well, Rubens

March 5, 2016

I am so glad her passing was with peace, just like I remember her in life; what a wonderful beautiful person and her gift to humanity with her creative work along with Al in the evolution and development of tbsp
May she rest in peace and dance in the heavens.

March 5, 2016

Since 1996 I am in touch with PBSP. Workshops and training. Three times I met Diane: once in Basel, once in Holland and once in the States. Unfortunately, never working with her. During all these years Diane's presence and impact was there. Each time when working with Al, through his eords when mentining Diane's contribution to PBSP , by the tone of Al's voice speaking of her and by the expression, his appreciation and love were deeply felt. We knew that on each day away from home Al was speaking eith Diane.
So, although my acquaitance with Diane is quite limited, I feel the sorrow of knowing that she is not there anymore. Feeling the urge to hug her farewell and hug Al in this moment of such a loss. Only when loosing someone we know really the meaning of the person for us. I know that Diane is inside my heart.

March 5, 2016

My thoughts and prayers are with you, Working with and living with your family are some of my cherished memories of Boston. I always felt very supported by Diane and hoped some of her grace and openness would rub off on me. Learned so much from all of you. I am sorry for your loss.

March 5, 2016

"It was a privilege to work with Al and Diane at Strolling Woods. I am so grateful for Al and Diane's work which has so influenced and informed my life. Condolences to the entire family and I wish them strength and love, grace and healing light at this time."

March 5, 2016

FROM MARG WHEDON

Where do I begin, having met and getting to know Diane and Al Pesso when I began working for them at their retreat center on Webster Lake in New Hampshire back in 1979 ??? Diane allowed me to bring my children with me as I did housekeeping, took care of guests needs, and eventually became a "jill of all trades", sometimes helping put together newsletters, and doing mailings and filing for the ever growing PBSP. I realize now that Diane made room for me to bring my 6 year old and my 1 year old and her playpen, because she honored my belief in being my own children’s caregiver / mother, while I found a way to contribute to the workforce and budget of my own home.

I went back to work for (and with) Diane several times over the years and I was there in 2009 to help Diane with downsizing and packing decisions and to assist with their move to Boston. I stayed on in New Hampshire to continue to operate a NH Business Office / communications presence for PBSP, Diane's and Al's life work.

As Diane's Alzheimer's progressed and Al's lecture and teaching tours in Europe grew in length, I actually moved into their Boston home to assist Diane for 4 or 5 days per week for the ten week duration of Al's travel schedule. This brings me to my fondest and most fun memory with Diane. During one of my stays with Diane, downtown Boston experienced one of the worst power failures in history when a major transformer fire occurred just 2 or 3 blocks from the Pessos' home. It was chilly wintertime and life on the 17th floor with no power, when we realized how long the outage might last, was a little scary. However, the living room windows faced south to receive some warmth from the sun and heat rises, so the 17th floor took a few days to begin to get cold. We talked about bundling up and getting in my car and traveling to daughter Tana's or north to NH but decided to be brave! The Star Market across the street was running generator(s) to keep one cash register open and a store full of things that didn't need refrigeration were available for purchase. Diane and I decided to turn worry into FUN. We "camped out". We were survivors! We actually had a BLAST, reminiscing about "old times" and Diane telling me how she met Al and all about their dance years and her daughters when they were little. We turned those 4 days into an adventure and ate like campers and laughed and went to bed when it got dark. It is, and will remain, one of my fondest memories . . . Godspeed on this new adventure, Diane.

Love, Marg

March 5, 2016

Dear alI. I just remembered one night of 4th of July at John Gale house in NH few years ago. Diane and Al were dancing. It was so beautiful! Diane was a real artist: intuitive, emotional, graceful and such a free soul. That is something very unique. She contributed with her special qualities to the creation of PBSP. What a life! Petra Winnette, Prague

March 4, 2016

Among the greatest gifts our mother gave us was the belief in the importance of being true to ourselves, creative, and individual paired with the courage and fearlessness in pursuing that path. She reinforced this idea even at birth with the choice of our names. She wanted us to have completely unique names so that we could be free to be our unique selves without the subtle and restricting influence of the examples of lives of other people holding the same name. As children she encouraged our creative expression and instilled a horror of coloring books or paint by numbers kits which would restrict our own ideas. As a dance teacher she was unique in teaching improvisational dance and also elements of choreography to young children.

Somehow, our mother made us feel so comfortable with being different and free thinkers that despite living in a primarily working class town, and being children of dance teachers who taught modern dance in a time and area favoring tap and acrobatics, we never felt out of place or strange. That was quite an accomplishment given how different we were from our neighbors. Perhaps this was because she also instilled in us not just a tolerance of diversity, but a celebration of it. She would find opportunities to bring people of different ethnicities into our lives and take us to local festivals celebrating world cultures.

Another gift she gave us was the courage to carve our own path and stick to it regardless of what others might think. She was fearless in pursuing her beliefs and so was a model for this. And lastly, she celebrated the creativity and accomplishments of her children and grandchildren all through her life. At the age of 83 and needing a walker and the help of a caregiver, she went to a late show at a nightclub in Boston to cheer on her grandson who was performing as a singer songwriter. He will always treasure the memory of his grandmother kicking up her heels and dancing in the aisles as she reveled in his music and performance to demonstrate her support for his creativity and path in life.

March 4, 2016

My thoughts and prayers go out to you Al and your family at this time.
I have such great respect and memories of you and Diane while attending many of the experiential workshops in N.H.
What a great gift she left us with, in PBSP.
Thank you Diane.

March 4, 2016

I have so many wonderful memories of Diane! Her grace, suppleness, kindness and ever-present concern for others, for justice and fairness. Her creativity and belief in people and determination, as Tana captured so well, to help them find themselves. She was a dancer for freedom, a choreographer for inclusion, a tireless worker for all. She shed a great light in this world that will continue long after her passing.

March 4, 2016

I remember the wonderful photographs of you (Al) and Diane as dancers. In my belief system Diane is dancing free now and very aware watching over you. Love and hugs,

March 4, 2016

Oh my! I remember Diane as a wonderful host for our Strolling Woods workshops as well as providing our Minnesota Psychomotor Training group with several workshops emphasizing her PBSP exercises that got us very involved and expressive in our movement on early Saturday mornings in the 1990s. As she moves into stardust, I look forward to dancing with her when my time comes. Dance on.....Diane...by the light of the moon spread your wings of consciousness..acceptance, peace, inclusivity, compassion,,.

March 4, 2016

My condoleance to Al and the family. I wish you all the best.
I met Diane and Al 15 years ago. during the workshop I stayed in there vacation house. It was a good memory!
Beste wishes,
Raoul Papavoine (clown, dancer, tai chi fool) , Amsterdam, The Netherlands

March 4, 2016

I will always remember the grace with which Diane moved and the graciousness with which she welcomed all us rambunctious PBSP students to Strolling Woods in the summer, and the so obvious love she and Al shared for so many years. With much love to all the Pesso's,
Ginny Wright

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March 5

Dear Diane,
last week I started a new training group. I taught the exercises and, as always, emphasized your central contributions. Your achievements continue to live on and improve so many lives!
Love, Barbara

March 6, 2023

Dear Diane, on your anniversary I am thinking of you with appreciation and gratitude.
In my trainings I keep mentioning your major contributions to PBSP. And my fascination is lasting, even growing about the information you gave us in the US Trainers' Training: That you explored the sponaneous Emotional Movement in reaction to the Expression of neediness before you trusted its "genuineness" enough to offer it via Ideal Parents. That was so visionary and in fact reoccurred much later in Al's conceptualization of Holes in Roles.
The true self contains the impulses both of receiving (in basic needs), and giving (after full maturation), and both contribute to the realization of uniqueness and potentiality. Maybe it comes with my own age, but my focus on that is growing - for myself and a portion of my clients and trainees.
May PBSP with its wealth of understanding of the human nature be able to maintain its momentum and contribute to the well-being of so many human beings!