On mother's day in 2012 I made the accidental best mistake one could.

I not only gave a speech for my mom while we ate out saying I appreciated her, I gave the same speech for my dad.  I told him that on Father's day, he better expect for something to be coming for him.

That something was intended to be a hug.  My father and I never really hugged, it's not what my family did.  Sadly, my father passed before Father's day.

On that day though my father and I reflected on my past like we often did.

He really found it amazing, that so much had gone off path for me in life, but that my life always found an overall path nonetheless.  As he worded it "My son used to be that guy dancing on the side of a street in a quiznos outfit, and now he's a major part of a small business".  I believe it gave him confidence in not only his faith in God to take care of his children, but that his children no matter how lost were going to come back to him.  He was astounded at how much I in particular had changed though out of the bunch, and he brought it up often, that it was something else to see what I had become.  But it wasn't just me.  All his kids, as he put it were "so many people going so many different directions". 

My dad kept us grounded while we figured out where we were going, and everytime we had doubts he would say something to keep us on track.  So on mother's day we had our technical goodbye, with me telling him how proud I was to have my parents, and him saying I was one heck of a prodigal son, with one heck of an odd history.  We talked our usual politics, we talked about our Uncle Robin being a bit of a hellion as well in his youth, and it was a great day. 

When I was broken, you didn't tell me to take it easy.  You told me that's when I had to fight.  That I had to do what it took, because that's the only person who can:  Yourself.  And I followed that path when it came to bringing our family closer together.

It's part of who you were.  You didn't wait for others.  You took on the burdens of the world yourself, even when you weren't asked.  I have never met someone who tried to handle as much as you.

When I told you I wasn't ready, you didn't just say I was.  You explained the ways that I was.  You reminded me of my strengths, when I doubted them.

We began as any father did, you would lead and I would follow.  But towards the end we became a team.  You taught me all I needed to know, and sometimes, I would lead and you would follow, just so you could let me become who I needed to.  And I saw when you did it too.  You didn't once mention Elle until nearly a year after I dated her.  You were worried, I'd repeat Brittany, but as you said "she yelled at you, and you took care of it". 

I took care of what I did because you taught me well.  I'll miss you.