Happy Birthday Babe, 60 years old today.  I would never have believed I would be sitting here without you for one single day let alone years now.  This isnt the way it was suppose to be.  There is so much i am sorry for and so much i regret..i wish i had one more day with you to love you and hold you to talk and laugh with you.  You gave so much of yourself to me so unselfishly and you were the perfect dad to the girls.  We had many many happy years and memories together, sometimes i try to wish myself out of this life just to be able to be with you again.  Bert was right when he told me i was a sorry excuse for a wife and i may have saved you that night if i was home where i should have been ..i am that piece of shit and i am so sorry..so so sorry you deserve so much better then you got .i will spend my life always hating the me i eventually became..

I love you always..