Oh Beau… You have always been, and always will be, one of the few constants in my life. Constantly inspiring change, encouraging hope, speaking truth, pushing forward, and picking me up when I am down. These things will not change. I refuse to let that happen. You are a piece of me, and for that, I am eternally grateful. How can our lifetime of me and you be over? In my head, it was always ‘us’. My first real friend, and forever my most treasured one. I pray, pray, pray Shayla and Chael will have lasting memories of their childhood like we do. We had outside and we had each other—what more did we need? The good has always outweighed the bad, until now. I really don’t know how a person survives this. It’s not right, it’s not fair! I’ve spent my life trying to protect you and I failed. Please forgive me for not doing more, being more, or pursuing these adventures with you. If only we could go back and scamper through the woods again, sled the big hill, snowmobile all over the place – when let off of the chain, play in the hay loft even when we weren’t supposed to, water trees together like it was the most important job ever, walk the driveway and wait for the school bus, share a bedroom when living in the garages, play hackeysack ball in the living room, beat Crash Bandacoot on the Playstation, hangout in the tree house, climb the “woodtick” tree, weed the volleyball court, jump on the trampoline and make up games, and have every frickin holiday. Not at all saying the holidays were bad, but that from now on, they will be heart-wrenchingly hard. I went to send you a text today, and dammit, I did it anyways. What am I supposed to do without my little brother? How do I look at my kids and not see me and you, every single second, of every single day? Those beautiful little monsters are us, and one day, that will be a good thing, but in all of it, I will make it my purpose to make sure they count on each other, play together, and love one another like there is no tomorrow. My kids love you Uncle Beau. So much. Shayla told me you’d want her to be goofy and somehow I know you actually said that to her. I just know it. I will keep putting my heart into making you proud of me. And with everything I am, I will always protect my baby brother’s memory, I promise.