bob
Uncule Bob and Me at Wildwood 2009 In NJ Sea Isle City.
Uncle Bob
Dear host-father Bob,
When I was 16, I came to the United States to spend a year as an exchange student and you and Kim made me feel welcome in your family right from the beginning. You have been a wonderful host-father and you and Kim made the year I stayed with you guys to an unforgettable experience. You and Kim gave me the feeling of belonging to your family and treated me as a family member. We share a lot of memories and special moments we spent together : days at the Jersey shore, the week at the beach house, rafting on Delware river, the days we spent in NYC, ice skating in Central Park, broadway shows, skiing, "Bike NY", our trip to Washington DC, all the family gatherings and all the states and places you took me to, lazy evenings in the hot tub, listening to your rehersals, your wonderful cooking, all of our talks... I wouldn`t want to miss one day of it. I will never forget how much fun we had, how much laughing and joking there was and how wonderful host-parents you and Kim are. You guys gave me the opportunity to understand an other culture and with you I was able to experience the American way of life. I`m thankful for everything. Very special to me and my family were the days when you and Kim were staying with us in Germany. I`m / we are so glad that we got the chance to know you. You will always have a special place in our hearts.
There are people who are so wonderful that I think: this must be an angel. Bob, you were such a person. God bless you. I miss you! Love, Stef
Memories shared on the Gallaway & Crane website
Paul, Pat and Liam, May 2, 2010
We all will miss our Bob-a Lanza. He was the best playmate a 7 year-old could have, a master thespian with a terrific set of pipes and an all around buddy to the non-theater literate. God bless and keep our dear friend. Both he and Kim are in our prayers.
A Wonderful Friend and Neighbor
Godspeed Bobby
"the leader of the band is tired and his eyes are growing old
But his blood runs through my instrument
And his song is in my soul"
Rest well my brother. I will always cherish our discussions those mornings in starbucks, being by you side during chemo treatments and the boundless joy of your home, of your beloved Kim and incredible spirituality. In saddened me in later years that because of my own life decisions disappointed you-- but it came to me these last several days it was because of your complete and total devotion to your beautiful and special sister--the way it should be. I could never repay what you gave to me and Pete during the preperation of Artie's service and will hear the chant of "Davey Baby" forevermore.
Living a life worth meaning and leaving without regrets is something to strive and I thank you . When you leave this earth the only thing you take with you is what you've given away-- I know of no one who left richer.
A More Complete Story
Hi Kim.
I decided to write some more thoughts and memories I have about Bob. Sorry if I repeat myself.
I don't remember exact days or times but my 1st memory of Bob was when I was a freshman @ Drexel and started attending a somewhat dysfunctional campus Christian group named Drexel Christian Fellowship (DCF).
Bob attended this group for a little while until they had a guest speaker come in who said some offensive things about Catholics, at which point Bob walked out, never to return (who can blame him?).
Anyway, I liked Bob and we managed to maintain some sort of contact through the years until our senior year, when we decided to room together @ Myers Hall, in a freshman wing (my somewhat misguided idea to maybe be a sort of 'big brother' to incoming freshmen).
Let's just say Bob and I living together probably had the opposite effect as far as being an example to the freshmen. We played pranks of each other, yelled at each other in mock new york / italian accents (we had a thing about watching mafia movies), had weekly 'bunker nights' where we would watch "All in the Family" reruns and sometimes be joined by neighbors (great teacher, that Archie).
I played most pranks on Bob, who, bless his heart, was a great sport. There was the times I would place a cupful of water on top of the door so when he walked in, he'd get drenched (he learned to kick the door open after a few drenchings). Or sometimes I would tie his desk drawer with a rubber band so it would slam shut when he tried to open it, yelling 'John I can't stand you!!'. One night, he got up and ripped my bed sheets from under me at which point I got up and did the same to him, grabbed a bottle of glass cleaner and proceeded to corner him, spraying him. All he had was a salt shaker near him so he threw salt on me, the whole time, both of us were giggling like 2 girls.
He could dish it out too. Many times I would be showering and he would throw debris or cold water into the stall as he walked by. Other times, while in the toilet stall, Bob would walk past, kick the door open and run out. and I can never forget unknowingly sleeping with a piece of spam under my covers until I noticed it the next morning, at which point Bob exploded in laughter on the upper bunk. All the time we would be calling each other 'you piece of trash!' or 'I'm gonna put your head in a waffle iron.' or 'no respect!', or some inappropriate slurs aimed at my South American or his Italian heritages.
Bob also was very protective of me as a friend, as evidenced by his referral to a lady who broke up with me in Drexel as 'the Trashwoman' from the break up on.
After graduation, we, along with Dave Keener and Linford Martin decided to torture ourselves by canoeing Maine's Allergash waterway for 80 miles during the thick of 'black fly season'. I remember the nets we used on our heads to keep from being bitten and how at night we had to run into our tents and quickly zip them closed to minimize the number of flies that would enter with us. Bob would then smash each one of them against the tent walls and yell 'dead!' each time he got one.
Our citronella and deet insect repellant was useless against these flies and actually seemed to attract them. We did not find much relief until we got a can of a 'mystery' spray from another canoer who happened to work for the phone company by fixing the wire posts. This can merely said 'Fugbug' and had a warning that some ingredients were unknown, but boy, it worked wonders!!! Every time someone complained of flies Bob would toss the can to them, saying 'Fug'em!' Also, who could forget the 'gorp' (peanuts, raisins and M&M's) trail mix and hot spam and eggs for breakfast.
Over the years, we would see each other at least once a year and have dinner, watch a movie and chat. I eventually moved to Michigan, but we maintained our annual 'meetings', sometimes I would visit him, sometimes he would see me while near Philly and he flew a couple of times to Michigan. We always made a point of dining at a good restaurant, Italian, Indian, Japanese or Mongolian.
I was astounded at his positive attitude during his bout with cancer, maintaining a sense of humor about his situation.
I once asked if his faith was affected by his disease and his response was: 'not really, I just figured shit happens.' And once, when Kim complained about a bad hair day, Bob responded with 'hey, at least you got hair'.
I truly felt liked and appreciated by Bob. He sought me out, we truly enjoyed each other's company. As recently as this February, he made the effort to drive down to Jefferson Hospital to provide support to me as I stayed with my mom while she was being treated for cancer. His being in remission from his cancer for over a decade by that point serving as a living encouragement to me and my family. I will never forget his warm embrace as I wept in fear of losing my mother and sadness at seeing her suffer.
I still have not fully absorbed this loss of such a great friend and don't expect to ever fully accept the vaccum Bob's untimely departure from this world has left.
I love you, Bob and look forward to seeing you again, till then, I leave you in Jesus' care.
Good bye, my brother, I truly love you as such.
John
Super Bowl stories
I have so many great memories of Bobby over the years. Most of them involve Bob and I eating copious amounts of food loaded with garlic!
Since we all know that Bob wasn't exactly a sports nut, I was very surprised to receive a call from him a few years ago asking if he could come watch the Super Bowl with me because he knew I would be watching and he thought the game might be a "pretty big deal."
We got gourmet pizza and Kim sent him over with a bag full of Lindt truffles (we ate everything!) and started watching the game. Rabid New York Giants fan that I am, I yelled at the TV, "The Giants cannot settle for field goals when they get in the red zone against the Patriots in the Super Bowl!!" Bob's reply was, "that's right they can't!!! What is the red zone?"
Our Super Bowl "parties" have been a tradition for the past three years. Next year won't be the same. Nothing will ever be the same. I have called this beautiful man my friend for over 25 years. You will always be in my heart.
I don't have any great singular story to relate. Just a deep appreciation and the honor of having known Bob and worked with him over the past ten years with Ridge Light.
Carmen and I were deeply shocked and saddened to hear of Bob's passing. He was one of the most sincere, sweetest and kindest souls we have ever met. A gently caring man whose dedication to his craft was balanced with a warm and engaging sense of humor and an enviable work ethic.
Some of the most memorable moments I have of Ridge Light Opera productions were not performance highlights (although there have been many of those) but were more the simple pleasures of sharing a laugh and talking about our families and hobbies backstage either during rehearsals or shows.
I know Bob will be greatly missed but I am also certain that his spirit lives on not only as part of the vastness of God's creation but in the powerful impact and love he had for his immediate and extended family.
John Hammel and Carmen Artis
P.S. I am also forever in Bob's debt for his turning me on to Guerriero's in Morristown!
An example of service ...
... Since the time we met through the Newman Center and the trip to West Virginia we connected.
We were so happy when you accepted our invitation to be our baby girl Goddaughter and didn't even blink an eye to say you would come to Argentina.
Thanks for being an amazing example to Camila.
I wish I would have not taking you for granted and had put a bigger effort to keep in touch more these past few years.
We'll miss you.
Pablo
Meat and fat!!
Bob and I roomed together in Drexel and this is him after a very satisfying meal of dinty moore beef stew.
Enjoying food was one of the great ways we bonded, shared stories, and laughed like 2 idiots.
I still remember how back at the dorm, he liked to throw food in the microwave, slam the door, set the timer and yell at the food 'COOK!!'.
We tried Indian, Mexican, Middle Eastern, Japanese and of course Italian food every time we met, which after I moved to Michigan became at least a yearly event . He introduced me to Victor's, a great restaurant where the waitstaff sings arias to the patrons.
I think to Kim's horror, we also enjoyed a good mafia movie and I was really looking forward to dining with him at a Philly restaurant named 'Joe Pesce'.
There were many inside jokes and sayings we shared. Many of which a bit offensive :) like the times we would quote lines from Spike Lee's 'Do the Right Thing', or 'All in the Famliy', an old sitcom Bob introduced me to.
There was the time when us and a bunch of freshmen were in our room in Myers hall watching All in the Family when several of our 'guests' started to yell obsenities. I almost fell over with laughter when Bob yelled : 'HEY! This is a Christian room, GET THE HELL OUT!!!
I remember seeing him act in the 'Forum' play @ Drexel, hearing his cover of Vaughn Hayden's song 'Calling out', both the official and 'unofficial' versions.
And more recently, his warm embrace as I wept in Jefferson Hospital after seeing my mother's despair in having just been diagnosed with a brain tumor.
Last time we spoke, last week, seems so trivial now in comparison, litlle did I know it was the last time we spoke when I gave him some car advice on whether to fix or sell the their Mazda Miata.
I do and will miss you terribly, Bob.
Kim, you and Bob made such a great pair, you are in my prayers. I ask that Jesus's presence is very real, heartfelt and soothing to you as you mourn Bob's untimely passing.
God bless you and the Lanza family.
John
A Note of Thanks
Bob,
I will always remain in awe, of your eagerness to try anything on the menu,hike off in the middle of winter to pitch a tent with friends, take roads less traveled and call it a vacation, of your generosity of spirit, and willingness to light the path or the fireplace for any who entered into the very wide circle of your love.
Thanks for the great times Chris and I shared with You and Kim and Amazing Tribe Lanza.
See you later,
Jim
A poem of love by Camila (his Canadian/Argentinean goddaughter)
I seek to find the love
in every heart I'll find
there's always some for everyone
no matter of the kind
It blooms in every single soul
when paired with someone kind
together it will live forever
even in the deepest times
Even when the soul is gone
Our love will still remain
it burns with us through dusk and dawn
our hearts won't ever be tamed.
Lanza Beach Week
Lots of laughter, good food, and drinks at sundown on the beach. Sea Isle City will never be the same without you. Boogie boarding, washer game, Yahtzee, chess, snoozing in the sun, miniature golf with the kids, sausage and brocolli rabe sandwiches, sidewinder sandwiches, and a cold beer after a hot day. So many good times and amazing memories that we willl always hold close to our hearts. We Love You, Bob.
Enjoying each other
Having a ball
Mark Flanagan, Kim & Joanie Flanagan
Kim & Bob in Honduras
White House in AC with Momma G
I met up with Bob to see Johnny Maestro & The Brooklyn Bridge at the Hilton in AC. Of course the trip wouldn't be complete wthout his first trip to the "White House" to sample their "hoagies,"some people call them subs He loved the whole experience of having to wait to be told you could enter the store,from the little waiting area. I had to snap this picture with my cell phone to capture the moment in his quest for the perfect Italian hoagie. After eating he smiled, sighed and said" it was good but it's not a Primo. Just one of many,many happy times with my 2nd son , not only my son-in-law,my heartfelt friend.
Love,Momma G
Curlig in Canada
Men did we have a blast. This was in December 2009. Kim and Bob had come for a visit to Calgary to visit us. Camila, my daughter and their godaughter was soooo excited about seing them again. On this trip we introduced Kim and Bob to curling, a Canadian delicacy. We went to this rink for 2 hours to try curling. We were surrounded by seniors with years of experience that were kind enough not to laugh and give us advise and instructions to how to play this "olympic" sport. I have a video of him pushing the rock and his happy face for being able to get it to the other side. I have known Kim and Bob since university and I have so many great memories!! You will be missed and you were well loved by many.