Papa my closest friend and confidant, a colossus of no mean repute; you remain the undisputed World’s Greatest Dad, Provider, Mentor, Life-coach, an unassailable Pillar of strength, erudite scholar, Influencer, indefatigable and committed Father!
Papa, writing this tribute is perhaps one of the toughest scripts I ever wrote in my life because I am yet to wrap my head around the fact that you have transited to the great beyond! Just a few weeks ago, we sat together every day analyzing the News on Television or driving around the city engaged in deeply insightful conversations!
You were unarguably my role model! You had a kind heart and altruistic spirit; Papa you emptied yourself and left an enduring and enviable legacy! Papa, your demise left a huge void in my heart; however, I acknowledge the fact that you lived a fulfilled life. You were an exceptional husband to Mum and since my birth till the day God called you Home, you never lived a double or false life and you were consistent in instilling positive values in your 9 children.
You were a man of impeccable character and integrity and would never shortchange anyone of their money or material; you were not a thief at night who portrayed himself as an Angel of light in daytime. Papa, you were also unequivocally blunt and you were not afraid to speak the truth irrespective of whose ox is gored. You lived a sacrificial life and displayed an unparalleled level of honesty and contentment; you taught us never to miss what we do not have or crave what we could not afford.
You swore that all your children would be educated in the four walls of a University (even if it’s a Bachelor’s degree in using Toilet paper).
Papa you taught us that one can have very little and be happy and also have so much and display the rarest form of humility without the world knowing your actual net-worth. Papa, you detested wasteful and reckless use of resources and you taught us to be prudent.
Papa, you were supportive in every way; you were the ever-present husband, father and grandfather who accompanied Mum and my kids to every Doctor’s appointment; you diligently and meticulously filled Mum’s medications and even while you were in the hospital for a few days before your demise, you would insist I go home and fill Mum’s medications to ensure she doesn’t completely run out of her medication and this often prompted me to ask rhetorically under my breath “What manner of man is this?”
Papa, you had the Manual for everything…marriage, raising kids, etc.; you were a Provider and you were always appalled whenever you heard stories of men who would not care for their families.
Papa, you were the father who would consistently go through our school workbooks and put in the personal time in coaching us for National Common Entrance or JAMB examinations and arranging private tutoring sessions to strengthen our areas of weakness. Indeed, you played a pivotal role in our successes.
Papa, you were not just loving; you were also a strict disciplinarian. However, one of the baffling things about you is that you never chewed us up or crucified us whenever we failed to attain or exceed your expectations! I recall the period I had an academic challenge while studying Dentistry at the University of Benin; you told me to keep pushing and that giving up was not an option; you said to me “you have to devote more time to the more difficult and challenging Courses and ensure you graduate because you cannot give naysayers the pleasure of sneering at you if you do not graduate with your intended degree”. You went further to say “even if you don’t intend to practice Dentistry, you can laminate your Dental degree and hang it up on the wall”. Ofcourse, your advice paid off and I graduated!
So many years after I relocated to the US, I informed you I was getting bored with my job and needed to pursue another degree in Medicine; you applauded my intentions and even wrote me a cheque for $10,000 on the day I left for medical school. You were relentless in your drive for your children and grandchildren to succeed and you remained our biggest Cheerleader who never backed down until we conquered any prevailing challenge or circumstance.
Papa, you were the Heavyweight who recommended and endorsed without any iota of reservation, the choice of whom I married. The words you said to me before I finally agreed to quit bachelor-hood and get married still reverberates till date; I recall you telling me “Ifeanyi, marry this girl, her parents are good people whom I have known for years as colleagues and neighbors and I can confidently say she will make a good wife”. You were right!
My kids were so attached to you and they have not made your demise any easier because they are still too young to understand the concept and finality of death and it’s either they are asking “Daddy when is Grandpa coming back from the hospital?” Or “Is Grandpa going to be back on my birthday?” The kids were so confident in the influence you wielded that they would run to your room to seek refuge whenever they did something wrong.
Oh! Papa, you passed away in the hands of myself and Ogo (your lastborn) at exactly 11:39pm on Sunday, May 22nd, 2022!!! It was such a peaceful transition. It was a rare privilege made possible by divine providence that you passed on to glory in my hands; I remember vividly your last words a couple of days prior to your demise; you asked Mum for a kiss and thereafter you turned to me and released your blessings upon me. I didn’t know those would be your last words because you were accustomed to declaring blessings upon your children and grandchildren on a regular basis.
Papa, I am so empty and heartbroken and to say I miss you is a gross understatement.
In summary, I have no regrets because I tapped the best from you and savored the best moments with you until you took your last breath; although I gave you my best, I am deeply saddened because my best could not save your life because God deemed it fit to call you Home.
Rest in Power Papa the Papa! Adieu Ogbuenyi! Rest in Peace in the bosom of our Lord Jesus Christ until we meet on Resurrection day!
Thank you for your sacrifices, thank you for your labor of love! Thank you for building a formidable template upon which our family achievements were anchored. You came, you saw, you conquered! You created a formidable brand in our family name ‘ONYEKWE’.
I love and miss you Papa! Your legacy lives on!
Your Son,
Ifeanyi Onyekwe-#7