Dear Mom,
I miss you so very much. A lot of changes over the past few years. We always kept things mum, but I'm starting to Let It Go!! I went down the alcohol rabbit hole for a little while. But the survivor me stopped and became awake. I learned how to eat better or what is best for me. When I started my healthy eating journey I initially lost about 60 lbs. Making the decision to stop or limit my drinking has been a blessing for me. And it showed me how people can leave when they don't want you to succeed. I have been learning to love me, give myself compassion and empathy. To believe I am worthy of every positive blessing I am given. I have lost some friends, but perhaps they were never a good friend to begin with. LOL I come here to talk to you because I know others have forgotten this site. It' my connection to you. I'm trying to break the negative feelings and learning that all the negative brainwashing we were given can be turned into Positive thinking. There are days it is a struggle, but I am determined to help my family see how they are enough and valuable to this life. Well Mom, hopefully I will post your passing on the right day. I always put the 6th, cause I sat with you, watched and listened to you go through your life. My heartbreak was when you cried and said: Please don't hurt me, please don't hurt me. I knew that memory all to well due to that evil man...... Ah life, it truly is what we make of it. I'm seeing so many wonders, wonderful times, humor and joy. Finally!!!! Oh and I truly am loving me, I dance for no reason, sing for no reason, laugh and laugh! Still need work on some of my anger issues, but I meditate and manifest with the believe I will be better. Love you Mom