TO MY WIFE, LOVE OF MY LIFE, MY SOUL MATE, MY BEST
FRIEND, NWANYI OMA, MY FLO!
Babes, this wasn't the plan. I don't even know where to start. I didn't know that life could be so cruel. My dear, I am completely shattered as it's like a nightmare that just won't go away. Getting to America, it was like a reality check that you’re gone. You came into my life like a thief in the night, stole my heart and disappeared. The pain is just unbearable and unbelievable. We had so many plans on how you will move to London so that Kobi could go to a football academy and maybe end up playing for Arsenal FC.
My perception about life changed on the 21st of December, 2015, as I learnt that we have control over nothing and that we are just here as mere pawns. Babes, I didn't see this one coming. I always felt proud when you called me Houdini that nothing was impossible for me, but obviously this one was. On that fateful day I prayed like I had never prayed before and also said to God not to give me what I cannot carry. So much has gone through my mind in the last one month that I often feel like I am losing my sanity. But then, I would say 'Afam put yourself together, you have kids to raise'.
Sometimes I wonder where I went wrong, who I offended, why must this happen to me and at the time when I was having a ball of a marriage. I always bragged about you to my friends, family and whoever cared to listen. I would also beat my chest that anybody that feels that they are having a better marriage than me should come out. Life was almost perfect and you were the perfect wife. I didn't know that the day we sat in my car eating chicken wings and waiting for your boarding to be announced was our last meal together and the last time I would see you. I beat myself every day for not travelling because I feel I might have taken a better decision but you kept on saying I shouldn't worry that everything was fine. It's like you were preparing me for the role of a single parent because you made sure I learnt everything from changing Kobi's diapers to knowing when he is sick, giving him drugs, taking him to hospital, buying all his clothes etc.
Going down memory lane, I vividly remember the first time I saw you at Concord Hotel, Owerri. You came for a school show. I was standing with my friend Kingsley and I said to him 'this is my wife' and Kingsley said 'Afam please leave this innocent girl alone'. I later saw you at a Diamond Bank branch. Then I begged Kingsley to introduce us, but he was reluctant because he believed I won't be serious. When we finally met, I asked for your number and you said I should get the number from Kingsley. I said: 'No that I asked you for the number not Kingsley'. Eventually you gave it to me and for the next two years you tried hard to discourage me. What kept me going were two things: nothing good in life comes easy and there was just something exceptional about you that I never saw in other women that came my way.
I remember telling you not once or twice that I wanted to see your parents. You smiled and asked me why would I want to do that. I said because I wanted to marry you and you said is it your parents I would ask first or you. We laughed about it and I went to see them. After seeing them, I never said anything till another year went past and you never asked me anything. Then I came again and said I wanted to see them, you replied in a sarcastic way that there was no problem and that they are always there in Abuja for me to see. I laughed and still went to see them. Nothing was said again for another year and you never asked on each occasion what I had discussed with your parents which at the time I thought was weird. Then came the visit of an angel when I was asleep, with first question: “Young man, why have you refused to take a wife?” I said I had not come across the one I can live with yet. The angel said: 'Yes you have a wife a while ago' and I was wondering what and who he was talking about. Then I suddenly woke up because I dreaded that word marriage so much and my friends can testify to this.
I didn't understand the dream at that time until after a month, it all came to me in one moment. I looked at every possible scenario where I could find a fault in you but all that came up was that you were simply immaculate. Then I knew you were the one the good Lord had kept for me. Many felt and told me that I didn't not deserve you, but I always said that I am simply favoured by God and indeed I am.
You completely changed my life, made me more responsible, got me closer to God, made me proud, put a smile on my face every day and gave me the most beautiful children anyone will die for. Most people around me including my close friends and especially me could not understand the drastic and positive change in my life. You are the best thing that happened to me and I will ever remain grateful to you. Going forward, I know that life will be extremely difficult without you, but I will try and stay positive. You are now my guardian angel and the same goes for Kobi and Zina. The saying that good people don't stick around is actually true, because you were loved by everybody that came in contact with you, generous to a fault, easy going and you always had a smile on your face no matter the circumstance. If I say I am not completely broken, I would be lying. But what gives me strength is that I was privileged to be your husband, and the wonderful years we spent together and the beautiful children you gave me would always be my source of comfort. Now, I wonder who I will go to the movies with, laugh with, talk with on phone 10 times day. I can go on and on for next decade and till eternity.
I will miss you dearly my love but I know that the good Lord wants you more and I promise you for as long as I am alive, Kobi and Zina will be well taken care of. Rest in peace my love. I will see you later where we will part no more.
Your ‘Fam
