Its almost been a year but it doesn't feel like, i still wait for you to walk through the door. I know you won't but i keep hoping. I am trying to be a good mom to Shy but i don't think i am doing so well. She has become a very good young lady, you would be very proud!! She finds it hard to be in this house without you so she has opted to go live with grandma at least for a little while, we will see, it breaks my heart to not have either of my kids with me, but as you know, i only ever wanted my kids to be happy. I hope this makes her happy as i hope that you are at peace now. How i feel really doesn't matter to me, as long as my kids are happy and at peace. i knew i would have to "let go" someday just think it would be this soon or this way. i miss you every day of my life, i hide it well or so i think, but Shy and Dan can see through that. I have found out who my true friends are through all this and thats ok, i only need Shy and Dan and family. what i wouldn't give to hug you, touch your cheek like i always did hear about your video games and smallvile at least one more time, which i know one more time will never be enough. I will miss Shy so much too, but i know i will at least get to see her and hug her, i can't do that with you. i miss you soooo much my baby boy, i know you aren't a baby but you will always be my baby as Shy will. I am and always will be proud of the people you both are. when i received an email about the angel tree, i instantly heard you say, yes mom, you were always so giving and caring to others!!! There is so much i know you are missing out in life, but i also know that you are at peace and with others that love you and your "new" grandfather Ray (Dan's dad). Dad knows he was waiting for you with open arms and is trying to hog you all to himself, and he's probably right. Dan loved you in the short time he knew you. You are that type of person, anyone that knows you loves you and those who didn't, well its their loss. I love you so much!!! I look forward to the day we will be together again my son!!! I have Shy as you know to take care of whether she is with me or grandma, she is my 1st priority. I miss you so much, that is why i talk to you everyday and every night!!! i love you so much more than you will ever know!!!! My angel Harley!!!! My forever superman!!! <3 forever in my heart, and you forever took a part of my heart with you! But you have left so many good and happy memories with me.