Let the memory of John be with us forever.

"May each tear and each fond memory be a note of love rising to meet you."
  • 62 years old
  • Born on November 16, 1956 in Chicago, Illinois, United States.
  • Passed away on February 11, 2019 in Arlington Heights, Illinois, United States.

This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, John Demmert, 62 years old, born on November 16, 1956 and passed away on February 11, 2019. We will remember him forever.

John was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma, a cancer of the plasma cells, in March of 2016. He fought this brutal cancer for almost three years before it eventually became stronger than his body. His tenacious, fighting spirit was never diminished however. He always kept a firm, "I will conquer this beast" attitude and never lost his sense of humor. He loved to joke around with everyone and consistently set goals for himself to work towards. 

In time, the cancer began to form masses in the lining of his spinal cord, which eventually caused him to become paralyzed from the waist down. Still, he refused to throw in the towel and was determined to gain use of his legs again one day. However, many sessions of radiation had little to no effect on the tumors, and the cancer continued to take a toll on his body. After developing pneumonia for the fourth time in six months, coupled with a bad urinary tract infection, his body simply could not take the beating any longer.

John was surrounded by a multitude of family members and close friends in his final days. He was immersed in their love and support until the very end.

He is survived by his wife of 35 years, Patty, and daughter, Dana (creator of this website). The loss and heartache we feel is devastating, and is felt by all who loved him (which is undoubtedly a LOT of people). He will live on in our hearts forever though, and we will keep his spirit alive by sharing stories, reminiscing on memories, and partaking in the things and activities that he too loved so dearly. God has a plan none of us can see or understand, but He has gained an amazing angel recently and we are thankful that John is in a place completely void of pain or suffering.

John - We love you so, so much. You are in our hearts, forever & always.

Posted by Patricia Demmert on October 1, 2019
October 1, 1983....our wedding day. Happy Anniversary in heaven, John. Today, we would've been celebrating our 36th wedding anniversary. Instead, it will now be my first one without you here with me.

I missed you yesterday. I miss you today. I will miss you tomorrow. Sending you all my love, John. Today, and always. XO
Posted by Dana Demmert on June 20, 2019
Last Sunday was Father's Day. My first Father's Day without you. It took me a while to post on here - I needed a few days to grieve and be with my own thoughts.
It was not an easy day. I don't imagine it ever will be. Seeing all the posts online, everyone spending their days joyfully with their fathers or getting the chance to at least talk to them.
It doesn't really feel fair that I'll never get that experience again. I'm only 28 and thinking about all of the Father's Days I'll have to endure from here on out makes me ill. It makes my heart hurt in ways I don't know how to convey to anyone.
So I celebrated you quietly, on my own, which is what I needed.
I was in Ohio that day, but I made sure to bring some of your ashes with me. It was an overcast, rainy day which ironically fit my mood pretty perfectly. I went off on my own and spread them under a small tree. That way, you can be apart of that tree as it continues to grow and I'll always know where to find you when I'm in Versailles, Ohio.
Missing you, Dad. Thinking of you always.
Happy Father's Day.
Posted by Patricia Demmert on May 17, 2019
I recently came across this poem, and I would like to share it with everyone. May it bring peace, comfort & hope to all of us. I know that John would want that as well.
HOW WE SURVIVE
If we are fortunate,
we are given a warning.
If not,
there is only the sudden horror,
the wrench of being torn apart;
of being reminded
that nothing is permanent,
not even the ones we love,
the ones our lives revolve around.
Life is a fragile affair.
We are all dancing
on the edge of a precipice,
a dizzying cliff so high
we can't see the dark ravine.
So we must cherish them
without reservation.
Now.
Today.
This minute.
We will lose them
or they will lose us
someday.
This is certain.
There is no time for bickering.
And their loss
will leave a great pit in our hearts;
a pit we struggle to avoid
during the day
and fall into at night.
Some,
unable to accept this loss,
unable to determine the worth of life without them,
jump into that black pit
spiritually or physically,
hoping to find them there.
And some survive
the shock,
the denial,
the horror,
the bargaining,
the barren, empty aching,
the unanswered prayers,
the sleepless nights
when their breath is crushed
under the weight of silence
and all that it means.
Somehow, some survive all that and,
like a flower opening after a storm,
they slowly begin to remember
the one they lost
in a different way....
The laughter,
the irrepressible spirit,
the generous heart,
the way their smile made them feel,
the encouragement they gave
even as their own dreams were dying.
And in time, they fill the pit
with other memories;
the only memories that really matter.
We will still cry.
We will always cry.
But with loving reflection
more than hopeless longing.
And that is how we survive.
That is how the story should end.
That is how they would want it to be.
John, we're all slowly learning to survive without you. It's not easy. It's definitely a process. But all we can do is keep pushing forward...one day at a time. Thinking of you today & always. I Love you with all my heart...now & forever! XOXO
Posted by Dana Demmert on April 11, 2019
Hard to believe it's already been 2 months since we lost you. It honestly feels like it was just yesterday, because it hasn't gotten any easier. I'm waiting for that day when the pain isn't quite so raw and deep.
But today is not that day.
I miss you, Dad.
Posted by Patricia Demmert on March 4, 2019
John...
I missed you yesterday.
I miss you today.
I will miss you tomorrow.
You are forever in my thoughts, and will always be in my heart.
All my Love, Patty
XO
Posted by Dave Haase on March 2, 2019
“What does love look like? It has the hands to help others. It has the feet to hasten to the poor and needy. It has eyes to see misery and want. It has the ears to hear the sighs and sorrows of men. That is what love looks like.”      -- Augustine (AD 354-430)
Written some sixteen-hundred years ago, it’s as if it were written just yesterday with John in mind. Every time I visited with John over the years, he always mentioned how he had the best job in the world at Clearbrook. It was never about money or status, but rather, what he could do to help those who are less fortunate. It’s as if Augustine had somehow been able to peer into the future and had been watching John the past twenty-five+ years at Clearbrook, when he crafted these words.
Posted by Dana Demmert on March 1, 2019
Dad, Patrick Kane has been crushing it for the Blackhawks lately (no big surprise there though). I can't tell you how much I'll miss never getting a phone call from you again hearing you yell "KAAAAANERRRR" and jabbering on and on how amazing he is for the 8 millionth time.
Funny the things we never realize we'll miss so damn much until they're gone. I've still got two of your voicemails saved on my phone from 2016 when the Blackhawks were playing the Blues in the playoffs and it ended up going to game 7 (Blackhawks lost but man was it a great series). I missed your calls because I was out watching the game at a bar and at the time I felt terrible that I missed those calls. But now I realize that maybe it was a blessing in disguise, because now I'm still able to hear your voice yell "KANERRR!" It'll never be the same as getting to answer another call from you, but I still cherish those voicemails more than any possession I own and smile (typically along with some tears) every time I hear them.
Missing you.
Posted by Cathy Watt on February 26, 2019
"Death leaves a heartache that no one can ever heal....Love leaves a memory that no one can ever steal."
Posted by Dana Demmert on February 25, 2019
"Love isn't something that we invented. It's... observable, powerful. It has to mean something.... Maybe it means something more - something we can't yet understand...
Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends dimensions of time and space. Maybe we should trust that, even if we can't understand it."
This quote is from one of my favorite movies of all time - Interstellar.
Love is something we will never fully understand. There are only so many words that can describe its depth and intensity. It's too big for that. It's just something that we innately feel even if we don't understand it. Love isn't stopped by miles of separation. Age has no effect on love. Neither does death. Even when our loved ones are gone, we continue to love them just as hard as we ever did, even though we are aware of the fact that they will never be physically returning to us. Love has no boundaries or limitations.
I go forward into the future, the unknown... but knowing that no matter what, my love for my dad will never waiver. It will be kept sacred in my heart until the end of time. It is unbreakable.
I love you, Dad. Always.
Posted by Joni Anderson on February 22, 2019
"You're gonna have to leave me now, I know
But I'll see you in the sky above
In the tall grass, in the ones I love
You're gonna make me lonesome when you go..."

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