Thoughts from a friend and lover
June 3, 2021
by K Hill
There comes a point in your life when you realize that who you are as a person is a reflection of what you have done and who you have done it with. Some people have simple tastes, simple thoughts, simple goals, and lead simple lives. Joe was not a simple person. Whether his courage was a result of nurture or nature I will probably never know but he lived large for a small-town boy.
I met and dated Joe in college, and we shared wonderful adventures. I rode in my first muscle car that he may or may not have driven a little too fast, enjoyed my first sushi using chopsticks that he trained me to use (I still laugh recalling his stalwart patience), I took my first solo vacation adventure traveling thousands of miles to meet him on an island and I even drove from Vermont to Brooklyn every weekend for a year in my rusty old college car (before he introduced me to the delights of rail travel)so I could romp with him (oh dear lord the walking) the length and breadth of NYC.
Whether I was roller blading around Central Park, learning how to bake the perfect apple pie in Brattleboro, rock climbing in Killington, sharing ice cream on Church Street, hiking Vermont’s famous peaks, or sailing on Lake Champlain, I savored every moment with that man. In the end I needed a simpler life than he had chosen so we parted as friends. He was out there though and that was all I needed to know.
In the last 24 hours I have thought about this long and hard, and I have decided even though his adventure ended before mine, he is not really gone. The way to properly use chopsticks lives on, the knowledge that Patagonia really is a superior clothing brand is still here, crazy cats will call him up, every time I see a stingray, use spray starch to crease pants, buy peanut butter or wear emeralds he will be there. He was an amazing person, he brought me joy, he left me with tools to bear his passing and he will be missed. I am better, so much better, because of him andI will hold on tight to those parts of me, that are him.
I met and dated Joe in college, and we shared wonderful adventures. I rode in my first muscle car that he may or may not have driven a little too fast, enjoyed my first sushi using chopsticks that he trained me to use (I still laugh recalling his stalwart patience), I took my first solo vacation adventure traveling thousands of miles to meet him on an island and I even drove from Vermont to Brooklyn every weekend for a year in my rusty old college car (before he introduced me to the delights of rail travel)so I could romp with him (oh dear lord the walking) the length and breadth of NYC.
Whether I was roller blading around Central Park, learning how to bake the perfect apple pie in Brattleboro, rock climbing in Killington, sharing ice cream on Church Street, hiking Vermont’s famous peaks, or sailing on Lake Champlain, I savored every moment with that man. In the end I needed a simpler life than he had chosen so we parted as friends. He was out there though and that was all I needed to know.
In the last 24 hours I have thought about this long and hard, and I have decided even though his adventure ended before mine, he is not really gone. The way to properly use chopsticks lives on, the knowledge that Patagonia really is a superior clothing brand is still here, crazy cats will call him up, every time I see a stingray, use spray starch to crease pants, buy peanut butter or wear emeralds he will be there. He was an amazing person, he brought me joy, he left me with tools to bear his passing and he will be missed. I am better, so much better, because of him andI will hold on tight to those parts of me, that are him.