Well, after being induced in the evening of the 26th, and going through a fairly easy labor, considering he wasn't that big, my tiny Angel Kaden came into this world at 3:16am on the 27th of December. His heart beat was strong until the very end when they cut the cord then he peacefully fell asleep in my hands.

It was then that I understood what everyone says about a mother's unconditional love. Something so tiny, so perfect, yet lifeless in my hands, had in a moment given me the sense of joy and love I have never felt before.

My family had a beautiful private service with the hospital chaplain and the nurses for my sweet boy. It was then that I could finally feel at peace for at least that moment. He was in God's hands now. And, in a way, God made that very clear to me. Did anyone catch the time Kaden was born? 3:16. As the chaplain put it, at 3:16am, God gave me the wonderful opportunity to hold an Angel in the palm of my hand.

While this is the end of Kaden's physical life here on Earth, I am thankful to be a believer of heaven and I know my sweet son is happy, healthy, and probably creating trouble with his friends and family who have gone on before him.

While I only knew Kaden for only a few months, he will always be in my heart and I pray, in yours as well.

Christmas day 2014 started out just as I had hoped, later than ever and the smell of my dad's homemade waffles. After the Holiday rush at work, I was so glad to finally get a day to sleep in! I figured next year would be very different considering I would have a 6 month old, and my family would be celebrating in FL at Disney World, so I was going to get all the sleep I could. We didn't even open gifts until after lunch!!! I bet I made some other moms really jealous with that, didn't I. 

The day was peaceful, full of smiles, Google Hangouts (Google's version of Skype) with my sister and her family who recently moved to TX, and of course, good food. My mom decided to change things up and instead of making a turkey or ham, both of which I was sick of dealing with, no thanks to my job (Meat department at Walmart) she grilled Steaks! Yes, Kaden might not like red meat, but I do, and the trips to the bathroom later were so worth it. LOL

Unfortunately, that's where the happiness ends for my Christmas. Late that night I was awoken with extreme cramps and some lower back pain. I decided to blow it off when it went away shortly after, but was then alarmed when it came back only a few minutes later. okay, I'm sure some of you are like..duh..it's obvious..but let's backtrack...first baby, I'm tired, and I'm 16 weeks along (not to mention I'm blonde) I didn't put two and two together. Or really, I should say I didn't want to. Not yet.

I woke my parents up and told them what I felt and that I was being serious. Something was definitely not right. Fast forward about an hour and I find myself staring at Kaden once again at the ER on the ultrasound monitor. Everything looked fine, so why was I so miserable? Then I heard that word I didn't want to hear yet "labor."

The team of doctors and nurses worked quickly to stop my labor. But there was one problem...my water had already broken. Time was now my worst enemy. I was scared and nervous, but to be honest I wasn't thinking the inevitable. See, my mom also had preterm labor with me due to complications with a previous pregnancy that ended up with a stillborn brother (and a lucky doctor who my dad decided not to kill). She was in the hospital on bed rest for nearly a month and a half counting the dots on the ceiling tiles of the room all the while her water broke, refilled, and broke again nearly every day. But her body and spirit never gave up and I had enough time to "cook a bit longer." So maybe I was going to beat my mom's record of time on bed rest? How in the world was I going to keep myself occupied for that long with nothing to do but read, watch tv, and talk to people? For two months!!!

While all those thoughts were racing through my mind the doctors continually checked on me. They took my temperature, I had the stupid automatic blood pressure cuff that started that death squeeze of my arm on the hour, every hour whether I wanted it to not. And the phlebotomist with the not so lovely personality took blood work every two hours to check for infection. All I wanted to do was sleep. mind you that went on until late afternoon on the 26th so needless to say I hardly got any sleep.

Then, again, one word would shatter my world. "Infection." My body had decided that clearly it could not hang on as long as my mom's and had already given Kaden an eviction notice. I was to deliver within the next 24 hours or risk serious health problems.

This can't be happening? My baby's fine. I can hear and see his heart beating strong and fast. He was fighting. Why couldn't I?

Usually, a "Baby's first" moment occurs outside of the womb, but I tend to look at things a little differently.

During December, baby K got to experience many firsts. His first photo shoot, his first outfit (thanks to some really excited friends who already wanted to spoil the guy) and first crazy Christmas season music rush. See, his mommy loves Christmas and singing in the choir at a few churches so he got to hear lots and lots of wonderful music. Even cheer her on during a solo.

Lots of friends were excited to finally "see" Kaden, as in my baby bump, at church and I really got a good laugh at some of the looks I got. So I'd say it was a win-win for everyone!

Boy how things can change in a week...

I'm so anxious I'm shaking. I wish doctors would not make patients wait so long for important news. Especially when every minute feels like an hour.

"Miss McClure.. your blood work came back and everything looks great! Your baby is at little to no risk of any genetic disorder." Phew!!! What a relief.

"And...you're having a BOY!"

AHHH!!! A BOY! Life stopped in that moment. This "thing" could finally have a name. And, there was definitely a cute face to go with that name. (Although he was a bit shy and covered his face most of the time during the 3D ultrasound)

So, ladies and gentlemen, say hello to Kaden Sawyer McClure. My SON :)
(All photos that go with my stories will be in the gallery)

Just a few days later on November 7th, It all started to feel real. with one. simple. sound. a heartbeat!

My first doctor visit was scary, exciting, and eye-opening to say the least. I finally got to see what all this fuss was about. And I couldn't take my eyes off it. How was that tiny little peanut shaped thing making me well up with tears of joy? It didn't even look like anything remotely from this planet, but yet I LOVED IT!!!

Well, over the next few weeks I learned how to manage and cope as best I could with the ever changing signs and symptoms that this little thing was throwing at me. I learned that he/she did not like red meat, anything spicy, and unfortunately, bacon. I went to yet another doctor appointment where I learned that it would be best, with my medical history, to have blood work screening done for genetic disorders. She then mentioned that it was 99% accurate (as she put it...blood never lies) at telling the gender. Wait? Say that again!

November 3, 2014 is a day I will never forget. That day my life as I knew it would change. I find it fascinating how one little word has so much power over a person. "Pregnant." Yikes!!!

Now, I know all too well that there are consequences to our actions, so I guess surprised shouldn't be the right word to describe how I felt. I was shocked. Why now? What on earth was I going to do to support a baby? I can barely support myself. These thoughts were a constant battle in my head for a week or so. Then, I decided, you know what, God has this. I'll be okay. And I even suprised myself at how excited I was over this news. I told friends and some family, and to see their joy and excitement made my new mom-to-be title ever the more exciting to me.

And so begins this crazy journey of...growing new life.