Kirstin Leigh Deguara, you were just so amazing to us all. You touched so many hearts. Your dream was coming true but then you passed away. You would have been a really good teacher and your bonds with kids was just so amazing. Your kids would of looked just like you.. Beauitful because you were so beauitful and everyone knew you were. Kirstin Leigh you were the best cousin I could of ever had. I know we had our times where we were fighting but we got over it Kirstin you were always happy and cheerful and loving, we are going to miss your smile and laugh. I loved your little laugh, it was so cute just like you. Kirstin  Leigh Deguara your favourite thing to do was ride horses and be with them, your favourite coulour was pink and it really looked good on you. It was tragically horrifying to see you go at the age of 15 also a month before your 16th birthday. Kirstin we will always remember, we will all miss you so much and will never forget about you. Kirstin Leigh you will aways be in my heart forever and ever.
I LOVE YOU KIRSTIN LEIGH DEGUARA.
You were the best cousin I could of had.

<3 Becca <3 xxxx

One of my last memories of Kirstin is Mother's Day,Scott had arranged a dinner with his girlfriends mother.Kirstin sends me a message by face book asking would I come,I feel terrible as I can't afford to go,Kirstin says she only planned to go if I went-

Mothers day,Scott and Kirstin meet me at their Nan's place,I get the biggest hug from her ,SHE'S SO TINY .Like she's not eating or something. For mother's Day -she has planned to get all four children together for a photo ,I had perversely asked for them not to buy a present or go to any expense,but I just would have liked a photo of all four of my children- I should have taken it then-if i had known -it  would be the last time i saw her, my last hug from her, i would never have let her go.Kirstin was so loving,I will treasure thoughts and memories we have of her-photo's movies ,they all bring tears to my eyes.That's all I have left memories of my dear daughter.15 years,10 months,13 days-not making her -16th birthday by 45 days.

                                   I'LL ALWAYS LOVE YOU-KIRSTIN LEIGH-

                                                  MY TREASURE-MY DAUGHTER

When someone you love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a wonderful treasure to always hold in your heart miss you forever & always. Time may pass and fade away But memories of you will always stay i still think about u everyday & as time goes on its startin to get easier to accept that ur gone but will always be in my heart.. RIP Kirstin Leigh Deguara one more angel in heaven, one more star in the sky. a thousand times we needed you a thousand times we cried,if love alone could have saved you,you never would have died. Can only stay strong for so long, can only take so much...then the tears overflow when i remember the one that was taken from this world with no warning Everytime i hear the rush of the wind or a whisper in my ear i know it is just you watching over me from above and letting me know everything will be alright... i love you

      It's 2004,Caitlin is 1 and a half years old,I'm nearly nine months pregnant with Hayden,who is born on 19Th ,October 2004.We are nearly finished building our dream house,one where the kids have there own bedroom.Mathew has already gone  to live with his dad.Scott is planning where and what he wants in his bedroom-,unknown to us he has also planned to leave,to live at his dad's. 
We are all out side ,it's movie time We have bought a movie camera,,Kirstin thinks it's great ,she 's about 10years old,she has decided she will control the movie camera.She plays havoc with Sonia ,who hates to have her beautiful face on film..Kirstin follows everyone around snapping photo's and taking movies,calling out Daniel is this how you do it,doing a great job all by herself anyway.You wouldn't believe it if it wasn't on film ,but Scott is actually hanging the wash out for me,he hated manual work.Kirstin is passing pegs ,Sonia is just being Sonia ,we called her pest.Not to be nasty,just a pet name.When Kirstin didn't have the camera she is looking out for Caitlin,she calls her bub,a pet name for her.Kirstin loved her from birth ,she didn't feel threatened by her mum having children to some-one else .that's just how she was,she loved life and nearly every-one in it We got some great shots of Kirstin,and some of Kirstin with Caitlin.   It wasn't until today that we found the movie and film.It was a great surprise to see my beautiful young daughter,as she was 5 years ago,fresh and bubbly full of life and the wonder of it.No worries ,just a child  being a child,no pressures of life.She was happy,laughing enjoying the day,I wish I could,I wish ,Bring her back to that time.....

Kirstin would come to school everyday and you really could tell whos she was because she was the smallest. Some days Kirstin would come to school and she would have to go to the toliet every morning. The day of her death I saw her at school and me and Sonia where laughting at her because on of her socks where uneven but we didn't tell her so the whole day she had an uneven sock and so would make sure we where at school before the bell but Kirstin always had to eat before school.. The good times with Kirstin ~ Leigh I miss her

Easter 2000,Our first trip camping at the Burdikin River.

Daniel's Toyoto Landcruiser packed in the back,two dogs heaps of camping gear, Mathew who is 15,Scott who is 10.In the front,Daniel ,mum.Kirstin who is 6,and Sonia who is 3.5 years old.

We arrive at the Burdikin on thursday,prepare camping area.Sonia's got travel sickness and spuws all though the tent.,Get settled for the night,only for it to rain,all gear still in ute gets wet.Yuk! All the next day drying wet sheets blankets (cos it's bloody cold up there)clothes ,etc.Kids spend time swiming ,playing on rope swing that has been tied to a tree.Daniel and Scottie take dogs accross the river to look for wild pigs.They find and chase two bores straight away. Easter Sunday comes all kids spoilt with easter eggs,

Charters Towers not far away,kids also love Macca's,we go there for a change in meals.

We all try catching fish,not alot of luck there.The children all  loved the Burdikin....

  Kirstin ;-a loving daughter to her father,mum and her step-dad.-  Kirstin was a troubled young girl she had watched with dread ,the carnege her parents did to each other Loving them both equillly.She had the strongest desire to do better,not to put her children through the same unnessary pain or indecision of which parent needed them the most.Who to stay with,who will get over it the quickest,who to lie to-who to protect.

Kirstin had first watched Mathew be taken from her mother ,yeah ,not all stories are told truefully.Then seen the clever way her father and other brother Scott ,had planned and connieved to do the same.All happening around the time her father's child support seems due to go up... Wonder Why that was ?Scott was turning 14.

Then in 2007,it was her turn,again the same,but this time more underhand.blaming her step -dad,That's O.K ,Kirstin your the only one to come back and apployagise.To tell your mum the truth,for that ,I did forgive you.Again about the blasted child support,so many iinnocent lives destoyed .All for the dollar....Kirstin was turning 14.

All that didn't matter though,Once gone , 13th May 2010 .NOT even two months ,her father was at it again.This time with Kirstin's younger sister Sonia .He couldn't wait even for the funeral.Of course child support was going up, he had to act quick...

.Sonia moved out to her father on the 4th of July 2010.Thankfully Kirstin didn't wittness that.!

Sonia was 13.

Leaving a already grieving mother grieving the loss of another child..