- 65 years old
- Date of birth: Aug 6, 1948
- Place of birth:
Hartsville, South Carolina, United States
- Date of passing: May 11, 2014
- Place of passing:
Rock Hill, South Carolina, United States
|Let the memory of Odell be with us forever, He will be missed by his loving wife of 44 years, Tammy, Sons Johnny & Bobby, Daughter Amanda and his eight Beautiful Grandchildren. F.A.E.|
This memorial website was created in memory of our loved one, Odell Fields, 65, born on August 6, 1948 and passed away on May 11, 2014. We will remember him forever.
"i miss my my pawpaw :'("
Well your 67th birthday was a hard one for me! I remembered the last one we spent together when I came home from work early and took you out to eat! You said can you take the time away from work and I remember telling you that you only turn 65 once and I will work late and make up the time.
I miss you . Plain and simple my best friend the person who could give it back just as good if not better than I dished it out! You were my rock and my best friend. I so miss out quite times when we would talk about our life together. I miss you fussing me more than words can say!
No one can ever understand this pain inside my heart because no one knew what we were to each other but Me and you. You are everywhere I go and inside every drawer I open every cabinet I look into I see reminders of you! I hate living this life without you! I flippen hate it there I said it!...
I can here your voice sometimes and I am so very thankful you are out of that pain! I know for a fact you did not suffer any longer than you had to! I am thankful that I will never ever have to come into this home and see the pain in your eyes! I know how bad things were for you! I knew you better than anyone. I will keep telling myself that and it does bring me comfort. It does I just miss the good times For the good times and all I am left with are memories of a Man who worked his whole like for me and his family!
I miss you creeping into my room in the middle of the night kissing me on the cheek and pulling the covers up. I never let you know it always woke me up because I never ever wanted you to stop.
Your light will always shine and Your name will still be spoken, For you and time stands still. Your heart is a part of mine with a love that can never be broken! F.A.E. Happy 67th Birthday Old Man I love you Wardon"
"What I wouldn't give to have you standing here to talk to just for a little while. I sure do miss you. It will be a year soon. I just got over being real sick for the first time and it broke my heart. Oh to have you here with me. You know what's inside my heart. F.A.E. Tammy"
Another bad day but not for me, Nancy lost her Husband. Now you never met Ken but he loved her so very much. They were Married for 12 years. He let everyone know how much he loved her . I am not sure what happened but from what I here from Stephanie I think it was the pain meds he was on for a bad back. She was so good to me when I lost you even brought me a sweet potato here to the house and I ate the whole thing. It made me think of you because you made them for me all the time. I will be going over to her house tomorrow to pay it forward as they say. I love you with all my heart and not a moment goes by that you are not right here inside my heart. All my love F.A.E."
"OMG Filing income taxes for the last time as a couple. I had to do that today. I had to sign your name to several pages. It hurt so bad . It brought everything back up again. To see it all in print. Your Death and the lady had to asked me three times what day did you die? I almost lost it. Oh well another chapter behind me and that's how I will just have to look at this as well. But to tell you the truth I am getting sick and tired of just saying another thing behind me. I just want to stop hurting and I want you to come home. I miss you."
I know its been a while, I don't want you to think I have forgotten you one bit. You are on my mind every single moment. I hate my life without you in it. I don't hurt as bad as I did in the begging hell if I did I don't think I would be here. It would have killed me by now. I still cry at the weirdest times. I will see your toothbrush in the bathroom and I will just lose it and no I refuse to remove it. It will just stay right there until the day I die. I will here one of our songs and my heart just brakes into tiny little puddles of tears that hurt my sole. God how I miss the sound of your laugh. I miss your smell and I miss your hugs. I miss your middle of the night kisses more than anything in he world. You will always have my heart and I will forever be your wife. I will always remember our love for each other more than anything, You were my heart and you always will be, F.A.E. Tammy"
Well a busy few days as we went to court to get some justice for you the kid that killed you. I was so afraid the Judge was going to give him 2 years he was crying in court and saying how sorry he was but he had told so many lies said you has spit on him and thrown a beer in his face and that you pushed him but I knew that was all lies from the first time I heard all of it. Thank God there was a tape of the whole thing and it was played in court it was hard to watch you being killed I wont lie about that but everyone learned the truth you did nothing to that kid and I always knew that because I know you and you would never ever hurt a kid. You would be so proud of the kids all of them spoke in court on your behalf. We all miss you and if you don't know he was given 15 years in prison for taking your life, But watching the tape I saw that you had a good night drinking and you died real fast and it was a blessing that you did not see anything coming at you were gone in a second . I am grateful for that. What a way to go to never know what hit you and to die so fast. That brings me so much comfort I am not sure why. Nothing can ever bring you back so I have to find comfort where I can. We have some closure now on that part. I feel so bad for his family. His Dad just broke my heart. He has two little girls that will now grow up without a Daddy but he is a bad Man and he has done this before he just needs to learn to control his temper or what ever made him this way. I believe he will do this again he was even bragging to his girlfriend the night before court that one man learned the hard way what he can do. He is a sick person. I don't know where I go from here. I would like to try to go back to work but I am seeing a new counselor and he tells me no way he thinks I have been taking care and worrying about everyone else so much that losing you has not even set in yet. Not so sure about that not the way I hurt with missing you, Some days I keep looking for you to come home , I keep hoping this is all a bad dream and you will just walk right in here and we can just start our life again. I miss you but you know that. I hope you can feel how much I still love you I always will. I will hold you right here inside my heart F.A.E. Tammy..."
I am doing every single thing I can to find myself through this jounery they call Grief. I have joined a support group for the first time in my life its like I am swimming and I have forget how to swim. I dont think this is the right place for me thow. Remember a few years ago when the three babies died aroung here Dannys baby then Bobs and Angies little one and then on the end of the street that little four month old and I was so upset I had to go see a counsler ? Well its reminds me of that time having to here about people losing their Children I cant breath it hurts me so much. How can I foucus on my pain when people have it so much worse than I do. I hurt so bad for them I cant think about me. I cant wtite anymore now I am to upset. You know what is in my heart I miss you old Man just like you said I would. F.A.E. Stay close if you can I need you. I cant do this alone I am not supposed to have to you are supposed to be here to help me through this life like you promised,"
I saw your signs all of them. Thanks for the APC truck that was it for me I know without a doubt you are still looking out for me. When I saw that truck coming home form Ga. I knew. OMG that was the perfect sign as we has just talked about how we had not seen one in years and we were looking for one on out trip as we used to do all those years ago. You made my heart sore with that one Odie. God knows how much I love you old Man to the heavens and back. I will see you in my dreams and keep you right here inside my heart F.A.E. It was a good day Oct 24th I felt you near me the whole day. I was not alone as I was afraid I would be. I should have known you would never let me be alone on that day not ever. Our love is way to strong for that to ever happen. I love you.....Tammy Oh and I saw your orange Butterfly you did good...wow"
I had another hard day yesterday I got real upset with myself. I cant remember your laugh? The sound of it. I have lost it. Its gone from my mind. I see you, I hear your voice inside my head but not the sound of your laughing. It breaks my heart. How can a woman spend her whole life with a Man she loves and in five months forget the sound of him laugh? We laughed all the time we would laugh so hard at times. I don't understand, is it because all I can do is cry? Hell I cant remember the sound of my own laugh any more. I will be glad when this month is over. I am not looking forward to next Friday for the first time in 44 years I don't want Oct. 24th to get here. No Happy Anniversary from you No card with you Beautiful words of love written inside , No kisses ,No hugs , No where do you want to go honey? No counting down the years to our Big 50 years together. Some days I feel like this is harder than it was at first I think it has set in for real now you are never coming home you cant, I know you are in a better place free from pain and happy and I want that for you I do. I just miss you so bad and I want you here with me. F.A.E. Tammy P.S. I am kind of glad you were not here last Sunday you would have had a fit I left the car running at Church for two and a half hours. I am losing it for sure. Just got out and walked inside without the keys and let her run.. Oh well I have been doing stupid things a lot...I love you and I always will. Take care of yourself for me."
Five months ago today. Nothing else to say about this. I am no better than I was that first night when I got the call from the hospital. I have got to change my life. Know one but me can fix this. I am going to go and take a shower and get out of this house. I love you old Man. F.A.E."
I have always loved the Fall weather. This is my time of year. This is October our month. The Month we chose to start our life together many years ago. As I have gone through the process called grief I have been so mixed up. I am at a point now where I am getting pissed off at myself. Not you or God but me and me alone. I should be able to be getting better because I know you are in a better place free from pain and you are standing tall your hands are well and not all bent up and you died so fast you did not suffer at all. I take such comfort in all those things I do. I cry so easy now at the slightest things and the water works will start my heart cant understand why you are no longer here where you belong with me. I am so lonely without you and I remember you telling me Tammy you are going to miss me when am gone and I would think to myself ya right but I never thought I would ever be without you.
That's what I thought. I cant find the Christmas ornaments you walked to Wal-Mart and bought for that new little tree you had us go bye because you said you were getting to old to handle the big one. So we got rid of the seven foot tree this year so I will be able to have a tree I could never have handled the one we had and you knew that.
I will always wonder how you knew this was your time but I have no doubt you knew. To many things you said and did getting things ready for me to go on without you. I know you are still here with me you always will be right here inside my heart. Let me know where the stuff is for he tree before Christmas. I found the tree. I love you F.A.E.
Well I made it through Oct,5th It was a hard day, I have had the hardest week since you have been gone. I cant talk about it that's how bad it was I just have to forget most of it. Some of it was good. I will write you more later. It very late and I have Uncle Bill here sleeping. It is such a blessing that he is still here with us. I have a lot of things on my mind tonight I will have to talk to my therapist Wednesday she wants to here all about it this week and I will tell her. I love you. Kiss everyone in Heaven...F.A.E. Tammy ."
"Hi Old Man,
I don't know why but yesterday I could here your voice. I could see you in the bathroom talking to JJ slick telling him how to brush his teeth and saying be careful go easy up and down. Then I saw you give him a hug. I am not sure if I was dreaming or if I was awake. I could here you tell me not to stay up to late old woman.And I laughed it was like you were here in this house where you belong. It was so beautiful the simple things in life that we all don't pay any mind to and yet it meant the world to me at that moment in time. I laughed out loud at you calling me old woman because you called me that starting at the ripe age of 16. I was your old lady for sure. I am trying to start the next chapter in the book of life but I just can not close the page on you, on us I never ever will be able to do that as long as I have this pain inside my heart that cuts like a knife.
I know you are never ever coming home to me not ever again but when I say that out loud or see it in print it makes me cry. Its like I am here in this house, our home but I am so homesick that's the only way to explain how I feel. Its raining outside real hard right now its like the angles are crying with me . I think I know what my problem is I have not screamed since you where taken from me I am afraid to I think if I start I wont be able to stop.And I need to scream real loud over and over again...You always had a way to make everything better when I was having a bad day, Make the world go away. I have a hard time without you in my life it was always you and me. I don't like being without you...
I feel like a small child having a fit because she cant have the only thing in life she ever wanted..If we could have just one more day. I would love to have one more hour with you . I am thankful for all the years we did have I JUST WANT MORE. I have so much I want to tell you. I do not have to say I love you ,you know how much I do and have my whole life...F.A.E.Tammy..."
It has been a while I have not been lazy just not quite myself as of late.
I never thought in my whole life I would ever get into a dark place such as this. I am working hard to fight my way out with the drs little pills. Ya right no little pill is ever going to help with a broken heart, Not a million pills could help with this I miss you the only thing that can ever bring me out of this is you and that isn't happening. So what am I to do. Deal with it the best I can. Someone told me on the phone this morning that in the begging I handled your death so well that they knew that when it did hit me it was going to be bad. Well here it is In the nut shell.
I found a poem the most beautiful one that makes me think of you. I have only just lost you the pain is hard to bear
Do I have to go through life knowing you're not there
please some one explain to me why he had to go
are there any reasons I really need to know
I sit here and remember all the lovely times we shared
the talks the laughter of every one you cared
I am told the pain will ease in time
and I will think of him without a tear
but that will be impossible as I need to have him here
He was my very world to me my ever guiding star
Just kiss me softly on the cheek and tell me where you are
But I know where you are you are in heaven and you are never ever coming home where you belong. The therapist told me yesterday I need to get out of the house again and take another trip that looks like her answer to everything. Take a trip I almost asked her if she had the money for gas or better than that a ticket to go on a plane. That would be better.
I lost my job yesterday F.M.L.A. ran out so I was let go. it is what it is. I cant worry about that. I don't even care at this point now much bothers me anymore. I don't do much but sleep. I do that a lot. well I am going to take a nap I love you old Man R.I.P I miss you always F.A.E. Tammy
I tried to write yesterday but I was so upset the words would not come out of my mouth. When have you ever know me to have a problem with words. It was not the words it was my heart. You know over the years every time Mark called we wondered if it was about Sis well it was this time. she passed away in her sleep.
I was worried about how I was going to get through working on your Birthday this first year well that wont be a problem as I will be with Johnny in Monks Corner with the rest of the Family saying goodbye to the Sister who has been in my life for the past 44 years. I will never forget her telling me not on our last visit but the one before she looked at me told me she loved me then said Tammy thank you for loving Odell and for being his wife. That came from her heart. She and I had a special bond between us it was the love we had for you. Her Johnny Odell Fields. And when she found out that was not your name I promised her she would have her Johnny Odell Fields in this family as that would be the name of our first born Son. And together we made that happen. For Marry our Marry for you loved her more than anyone on this earth. She was our rock. I think I looked up to her more than anyone in my life. She was so special. I cant get myself together today and I need to get ready for work but the tears are flowing like a river.I find it hard to breath . I don't know how much more of this I can take. I always try to be positive but this is to much, I know it was her time. I have to tell myself that. Love F.A.E.Tammy"
"There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about my Grandfather Odell Fields (AKA Paw Paw). It seems like that it was just yesterday he was showing me how to cut grass at the house on Canberra Dr. with probably one of the biggest yards in the neighborhood, and everyone but him had a riding lawnmower. I can also remember the first basketball I ever got, was from him when we went to the landfill one day. Which was also the first time I ever heard the expression, "One man's trash is another man's treasure." It was the late nights we were on the front porch talking about everything and anything from 12:00 - 3:00 AM and he would say to me every single time, "Keep the wind to your back, and the Sun to your face." I never really understood what those exact words meant until May 11th of this year. I thought of it like he was talking to me as if we were on a ship and we were at sail. Always be aware and know where you're headed and don't let anything hold you back. If there is one thing, if not everything, I've learned from my Paw Paw, is to just let life go on. Let it happen. I love you Paw Paw, I'll play the game of pool and round of golf I owe you some day.
I miss you so bad tonight, my heart hurts. I messed up and went into the cedar chest. I wish I had kept my butt out of there. I found so many cards from over the years, Beautiful cards. Christmas, Birthday, Mother Day, Anniversary cards going back to our 13th wedding anniversary. Some have smoke damage where they were in the house fire but I still have them. I feel like my heart has been ripped out all over again.
I could see you setting at the kitchen table writing in those cards your beautiful words of love that came from your heart. OMG This is so not fair that you are gone and I am left here to go on without the love of my life. Oh and I even found an old valentines card a real big one. You were so good at giving me cards. You never ever forgot one special day in 44 years not one.
I also found your birth certificate. I never knew you were born at 11 15 pm. So I have both your death and birth certificate. You were born on
August 6th at 1115 pm and Died May 11 at 8pm and out of your 65 years and 9 months on this earth I was bless to have had you in my life for 44 years . I will always treasure our life together. The Family we raised the love we shared and the life we lived will remain in my heart until the day I die. We never had a boring day not one you made sure of that it. was a ride I will remember forever. Not always easy but worth every second of the trip. Every moment for sure. Most of the cards you write how you will always be near me ? where are you tonight when I need you to hold me and tell me its all going to be ok? that I am not alone? You cant do that anymore because I am alone for the first time in my life its me and me alone without you.
Ok enough of this feeling sorry for myself because you are not here. I have to go on with my life. I know you hated to see me upset. Nothing made you more upset than to see me hurt and upset. If someone upset me you were ready to have someone head. I always loved that about you my Man he took care of his wife. No doubt about that never a truer statement than that.
I just found another card from a flower shop it has Happy Easter
I love you from the bottom of my heart hurry and get better Odie F.A.E.
I must have been sick I have no idea what year but we lived in Charlotte N.C. because that's where the florist was located. I did not work when we lived in Charlotte so you had to send flowers to the house I don't remember that it was to many years ago.
Odell where did the years go ? I wish I knew? They just went by so fast those 44 years we had was like we blinked and then gone just like that. I would give anything for one more hug. One more I love you my dear old Man...I love you to. From the Bottom of my heart. I think you told me a lot more than I ever told you...Tammy F.A.E."
"Good Afternoon, My Dear Husband
I have never written you in the afternoon but with me going back to work tomorrow I just wanted get this off my mind.
When we first fell in love there was no telling where it would take us. I feel like it its taken us just about everywhere! We've hit some wonderful highs , a lot of lows and a whole lot of in-betweens. But one thing we did know when we started this journey is how we would get wherever we were going....together. Side by Side, Heart to Heart and in LOVE the whole way. And for me .that's always been the very best part of the past 44 years of our life and it always will be. F.A.E. Your Loving Wife"
"Good Morning sweet Man,
Back Home in good old South Carolina where my Dad moved us to back in 1967 I must say it was wonderful to see family again. I also visited nine gravesites was able to put flowers on seven I did not know I would be going to the other two. I had no car when I was home my cousins were driving me around and it was nice. I don't get home enough to know my way around you know how I am with directions. I think I saw just about every family member that still lives back in Ohio. I know I visited all who do not.
I did a lot of thinking a lot of hugging a lot of growing a lot of searching for my lost youth. Then I remembered I never lost my youth it is right here inside my heart I just had to reach down and pull her back up to the top where she has always been. I lost you and half my life to a stupid young punk but I am right here.
I heard myself laugh a lot ...loudly at my 89 year old wonderful Uncle Bill. He is so funny and then it hit me like cold water being thrown into my face...Tammy you are going to be fine you are inside here and you are coming out of this dark place where death clouds and destroys living people. I am going to do what that you would want me to do I am going to live my life I am going to laugh I am going to smile I am going to be me. I will never again be the same person before I lost you as I am forever changed but I AM STILL ME.............Have a wonderful day in heaven kiss and hugs to everyone who has passed before I have to get ready for Monday morning as I am returning to work. F.A.E. your loving wife Tammy"
It has been a few days. went home to Ohio to see the Family Uncle Bill turns 89 tomorrow. He is still young at heart and funny as ever. He had me laughing my head off and at this point in my life not easy to do.
I am going to go back to work Monday I am so ready I miss it. I just hope I can make it out this door without my daily helper the Man behind the woman pushing me making my snacks , coffee, making sure I have everything I need for my day cell phone badge all the things you did every single day, I have to be a big grown up girl for the first time in my life and suck it up and do this thing all by my own self...Remember to lock the door I never ever had to do that you were always here to walk me to my car and carry my things kiss me goodbye and tell me to have a good day. Oh did you have to spoil me so bad? I am getting better I promise I am. The heart wants what it wants but I know you are not coming home and life goes on. I know you would be so proud of me. The tears are not near as bad as they were when you first left us. I know you would not have left me if you could have stayed it was not your choice. It was your choice to go to that place but you did nothing to cause your death. I was mad at you for a while but I am not upset with you now. I just miss you I think I always will. Time for bed all my love kiss everyone in heaven . Oh I had a long talk with Daddy back home at his gravesite I thanked him for our 44 years together, He made it possible for us signing the papers for us to marry in the first place..That was important for me to do that. It felt right and so good for me to be able to do that. Kind of like closure sort of for our life somehow. I am not sure why. But it made me feel good to set there and talk to him and poor my heart out. He only lived 7 short months after we were married but you know that. R.I.P I will always love you F.A.E.Tammy"
"Good Morning Sweet Man,
I have been a busy lady, Went 2000 miles away and saw Danny. It was the most beautiful place I have ever saw in my life. Well it was right up there with when you took me to see the grand canon for sure for our 25th anniversary! I even walked over 2 miles can you see me doing that? I am working hard at finding my way without you as I know you would want me to do that,
Coming home was hard I miss you with every breath I take it was me and you for 44 years now just me but we talked about this day coming and one of us being left behind to go on without the other I just did not know how hard it would be,
The Grandbaby's are having a hard time JJ is for sure you know him he hides his feelings but I see it. He is such a sweet loving child takes after his Paw Paw.
I have to see Dr Johnson and Dr white today I am going to have then release me back to work I am more than ready. My mind is clear now I have accepted what happened and you are not coming home and life goes on. I am a strong lady after all look at the Man who raised me ! I was just 16 years old and it was you who taught me how to be strong willed and how to stand on my own...I can here you tell me don't take crap from anyone not even me and if you want something in this life go for it and never let anyone stop you not even me! And trust me you know I lived by those words my dear sweet husband I lived by those words. You did not call me the Warden for nothing .
I cry a lot how can I not you are not here where you are supposed to be. But I also know you are in a better place free from pain and free from all the hurt you suffered in your life from that damn war... I will see you again one day my love until then all my love F.A.E.Tammy"
"We all have to Die. Never a more true statement than that. Not going to get out alive. None of us are. I am lucky I was Married to a wonderful Man a very loving Man who no matter what problems he might have had he never once thought of walking away from his Family his Wife or Children. The hardest working Man I ever met in my life that was him. He had more love in his little finger than most have in there whole body. That wonderful Man gave me everything I asked for in this life. I asked for a family and I told him I wanted to stay at home and raise them myself no daycare. He said ok done. I did not go back to work until our baby was 5 and he never missed a school event. He never missed a ball gave when the boys played. He was always with me when I was sick or in the hospital for what ever reasons. He was the real deal. We did not have money we did not care about that we were rich we had love real love the kind that makes a family. We has laughter and happy times and then someone took his life, but what would have happened if it had not have happened like that? He was almost 66 years old and God works in his way not ours. I do think We were spared him form suffering a painful death. He never knew what hit him as he was hit from behind in his neck so hard and when he hit the ground that was it he was gone. He was not there after that so maybe that was a good thing or is this the only way I can deal with what happened to him but I don't think it is. I think this is what happened for real. If I had to chose watch him die a painful death through an illness...OMG No that would have killed me. So I chose to count my blessing he never knew what hit him . Thank God...
I will always love you old Man F.A.E. Tammy Willis Fields Your Loving Wife......"
"I so love this ...I am learning how to heal one baby step at a time. love you Odie
In fact, the capacity to love requires the necessity to grieve. You can't heal unless you openly express your grief. Denying your grief will only make it become more confusing and overwhelming. Embrace your grief and heal.
Reconciling your grief will not happen quickly. Remember, grief is a process, not an event. Be patient and tolerant with yourself. Never forget that the death of someone loved changes your life forever. It's not that you won't be happy again. It's simply that you will never be exactly the same as you were before the death."
"Hello Sweet Husband
I miss you every single Day of my life I always will. No doubt about that. The tears are not as bad as they were at first.. I have listened to you and am working hard at planning my life without you in it just like we talked about so many times. One of us would be left here to have to go on without the other . See I told you I would not die first and leave you! I know how worried you were I would.
I am going to see if the Dr will let me go back to work I am ready. I also am going to get a little kitten so I will have something to come home to . Just one baby girl kitty from a shelter. I need something to look forward to come home to and that's just the thing for me. You know I have missed our tiger ever since the house fire back in 1995. It is time I got another one.
All the kids and Grandkids are ok but then you know that you can see us all. I talked to JJ about you just yesterday on Amanda's 34th Birthday
It was a hard day for her missing you I knew it would be. She was a Daddy's girl for sure. Well its after 1pm and way past bedtime for this ole lady. I love you will write you later see you in my dreams I love you F.A.E. Tammy"
"Sunday Morning Good morning Old Man,
I don't understand why the mornings are so hard? I think its maybe because its knowing I have to face another day without you here and for the last 44 years of my life I always knew it was going to be you and me. I had two good days this week I did real good then back to missing you so bad I have a hard time thinking straight. I think I know what it is. You were my rock, you were the one I turned to for every problem every little complaint every pain I had every tear that fell was with you. Every loss in my whole life you were my comfort, every problem it was you, I turned to. every idea I bounced off you every decision I ran buy you first well almost all of them. But I would tell you later on for sure. I am just so lost without you here to talk to. I miss fighting with you and laughing then starting all over again. We had a great life together you and I. I could not have picked a better Man to spend my life with. I just hope I told you as much as I felt it. I so loved you and I always will...Tammy F,A.E. You know what that means you taught me at 16..."
".Written 6 11 2014
You Have been gone one Month today. I still have not cleaned out the food you liked to eat from the rotter in the fridge. I will through all that out today containers and all. I have not touched your things yet I don't think I will ever be able to do that, I did wash your sheets on your bed and make that up. No one will to go into your room. Your T V has not been turned on one time. I will go to the cable company today and turn that off you would want me to do that. And the home phone I will turn that off also I only kept that on so I could reach you I don't know how to delete all the messages off the darn answering machine anyhow you always did that stuff. Oh and the filter on the air conditioner I cant change it I cant climb that high. I don't know what to do about that. I will work it out somehow. My mind is not working right I am trying to get it together. Going to a therapist I like her a lot. You would like her to she is all about me taking care of me just like you were. I did try to go back to work that lasted one day I could not think my mind is just to jumbled. I make a list of things to do then don't do it. well not all of it. I manage to get one or two things done a day. I have never lived without you. you are the one I turned to my whole life for everything. without you I am just so lost. I am strong I will work it out I wish someone could give me a time limit on this but what I here there is no time limit to be found. I miss you I miss your big mouth fussing at me asking me what have I eaten today and how much fruit I had, How much water have I drank, and what time did I go to bed last night? Then fussing at me I need more sleep and how important it is for me to get my rest! I Pray you are Happy in heaven that's what keeps me going is knowing you will never have to suffer again in this world. R.I.P. I love you..F.A.E.Tammy...
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Thinking about things , and about you .and what made you happy. Being a Dad and a Paw Paw made you happy but you also took that as a job with lots and lots of love but you also knew in your heart you had lessens to teach and things you wanted them all to know and that was important to you. I saw that. You never felt you measured up., But then I got to thinking you were so proud of one thing. The one thing you talked about more than anything to anyone who would listen, You would stick your chest out and brag and talk about us and out years together. The life we had and how we always stood together through it all. Even when the experts said was a 95 present chance we would not make it though that without a divorce we proved then wrong not just once but several times. We were going to have our 50 years come hell or high water. We came real close old Man real close. Remember when we got Married way back in 1970 everyone laughed said we would never make it past six months. We showed them. That's what love will do and a wise Man you were because you Married me...lol I knew that would get ya...Love you F.A.E BOO COO Always and Forever Tammy"
"Had to go to the Court House in York South Carolina yesterday. Now from what I was told the building was not open but I walked right in and lost it as the memories rippled through my mind I screamed as I held my hand over my mouth. Oh my God what am I doing here in this old building I had not been here in almost 44 years that was the same place we had to go when we got our Marriage licenses on Oct.22 1970. I had the papers in my hand. I walked around that old building for at least 20 minutes no one was around as it was closed. Then a Man came out of an office and explained where I needed to go was in another place as everything had been moved for remolding. He asked if he could help me I explained no. At this point know one can. Not a good day but maybe it was. Its another chapter behind me. I have realized things are worse for others I have a lot to be thankful for. Have a great day all. Tammy"
"Your favorite time of year summer hot, humid ,sticky and yucky oh how you loved it when it turned hot! You so loved working in your yard cutting your grass. I can see you now trimming the driveway with those big black scissors . You would work for hours on that and take so much pride in the way it turned out. Back breaking work but that was you. The harder you worked the happier you were in your self it was a pride thing with you its what made you feel good as a Husband ,and Father , I remember you coming home from work days on end with your hands cut and bleeding from building the most tires and the pride in your eyes and that smile on you face because you were taking care of your family . You had a heart of gold, I will forever remember that Christmas on Cedar street and Bobby's list. piece on earth , moms love , dads love . super Nintendo that was it I cant remember the year but I do remember you and how you said no more of that kind of video games in the house as we had a game system of some kind maybe two I cant remember. But with that being all he asked for well I went out and bought it and it was under the tree. Then well I was just going to pretend on Christmas I had no clue where it came from, but on Christmas eve you and that heart of your messed up my big plan and said hurry we have to get to k mart and get Bobby's Super Nintendo ! Well I should have known that was going to happen I was pretty good at knowing what you were going to do and say well that did take a few more of being married maybe not way back then. I came clean and you laughed hugged me said of course its under the tree and we went to buy more games for the darn system because you said we had to...Yes that's was his Daddy's Heart for his son. I hated shopping on Christmas Eve you loved it .I think it was the only day you loved shopping.
06 21 2014 Tammy Willis Fields F.A.E."
"Odell, you were my brother in law for such a long time that I thought of you as one of my own brothers. I even saw you more than them. You were always so kind, respectful, only to say a few.
You were always and forever talking about Tammy and y'all whole family.
I always knew you we're an awesome husband , father and grandfather. They all felt your love and kindness.
Mr. Odell Fields you are missed by so many and always will be.
Forever your sister!"
At times the pain is so fresh
I can feel the stabbing through my heart.
Then there are times when
I can breathe normally.
At times I can almost
Smell your cologne.
Then there are times when
I have a hard time seeing your face.
At times I think
I'll never be happy again.
Then there are times when
I feel myself smile.
At a memory of the two of us."
"i'm so sorry for your lost, my heart go out to you Tammy, i didn't know your husband but from what i saw and hear he was a great man, god bless you and never forgotten
When someone we love dies, it seems as if time stands still. And silence... a quiet sadness... often can be felt, not just heard, a longing for one more day... one more word... one more touch... And we may not understand why God chose to have him leave this earth so soon, or why he had to leave before we were ready to say goodbye, but little by little, we will begin to remember not just that he died, but that he lived. And that his life gave us memories too beautiful to forget. We will see him again someday, in a heavenly place where there is no parting. A place where there are no words that mean goodbye." sherry griffon"
"It is impossible to put into words the last 33 years of my life with the man that I was blessed to call my daddy. He was wise, humble, stubborn, loving, giving, selfless, and honest. Most of all he was my hero. He helped me above and beyond the calling of a parent. Helped me with my two children when I needed him most and stepped up as the father figure to my youngest son. I will never forget the sayings and quotes: funny or serious this man has left me. He truly left a legacy for all of us. He and I would sing and laugh and goof off as often as we could. Sometimes honestly at the expense of my beautiful mother (sorry mom :) He loved her dearly and set the perfect example of what I hope God has in store for me. I will forever treasure the memories of my dad and all he did for me. He never missed a school event, helped me with my homework as a child, taught me right from wrong and supported me in every decision. He and I even ventured into places that we should not have but hey...those were good memories too ;) My rock, my guide, my protector, my closest friend who understood me because we were made just the same inside and out....I love you old man!! Love Your Daughter Amanda Yvonne Fields (fyi, he named me from the Waylon Jennings song Amanda....oh how i will miss him singing me the song) Rest in peace with the angels, your loved ones passed before, and in the arms of our precious savior Jesus Christ. See you again one sweet day daddy...until then...Vaya Con Dios"
"How do you write about the last 44 years of your life on a memorial web page? It is not possible. I lived inside this Mans heart. I will forever love you. We first met when I was just 16 and you 21 years of age. I did not know your name but told everyone I would marry you that was 44 years ago this month. You laughed and said you would never marry and the rest my dear is history! Three beautiful Children Eight Grandchildren. Our life was cut short like your Fathers was. You were loved more than you will ever know and not just me my sweet Man not just me. I know how you were I know you would not like the tears and you knew me. The tears will flow like a river and when I am done I will laugh and the funny memories we shared over the years. Your Family is amazing I am not alone God is always by my side. I feel your love. As I start this last chapter in my life without you I hurt, I hurt so bad but it all a part of living. I miss you, I always will and its only the beginning. I was strong enough to end your suffering. I promised you I would never ever let you go through that and I did it! I was the wife you need me to be. For that I am proud. See you in my dreams. Meet you in Heaven F.A.E. Your Loving Wife Tammy Willis Fields"
"This is so beautiful..... Tears tonight as I think of your loss. Also this makes me think of my sister that left us way to soon.... My prayers are with you Tammy.. I love you always.. You are such a wonderful person...."
"When I was 8 or so I rode my bike to hardees threw it on the ground and said oder give me a chocolate shake and some fries! I love you man RIP oder. Love David"
"RIP my dear sweet brother in law"