Times of grief and sadness pull our hearts toward God as we look to him for comfort and relief, for those who believe in him. Sometimes our thoughts and feelings become so messy that we seem like strangers to ourselves. Some people just cannot make sense out of anything that is happening. Some are even caught off guard by the way they are responding to it. Chatting to others may help, but they’re not always around. Nonetheless God is, and he’s always ready to listen. Some people find ways of taking prayer one step further by keeping a hard copy of their prayers. For them, it is to hold it in their hands as proof that they have indeed placed themselves and their circumstances in the hands of God. Whenever we put into words our fears and frustrations, we move them from our consciousness into God’s. As we do this time and time again, their power over us decreases and God’s power in us increases.  

Today, I lost an Uncle and father. Uncle, there has never been a pain so blinding, so breathtaking. Never a loss like this. My friend. My uncle. My father. My mother’s best friend and brother. A best friend to my aunt, his baby sister and a wonderful brother to her. The empty year(s) yawn before me (us) like a great murky gap. All the memories of our life together deluge my senses and send me reeling.  If I could only lie down beside him and sleep forever…

Then even now-even in my numbness-I can feel your caring voice, see your bore hair and laughter around me. In answer to my unspoken prayer, you have sent the Comfort, the One who will grieve with me (us), and the One who knows how it feels to be human.

And it helps to know that the one we love and care for is seeking us at last, face to face. He always said he’d like to devote the first hundred years of eternity asking all the questions he’d never found answers for. Then he wanted to meet Moses and Abraham and the other greats.

Teach me to live again, Lord. Then take me home so we can all enjoy you forever.

 Until then,

I missed you, but the connection stays forever!