Happy Birthday Pam. Memories of birthdays past fill my mind and while they bring a smile to my face, my heart is heavy not being able to tell you in person Happy Birthday my friend. You are always on my mind, I love and miss you.

Oh Pam, I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you. I didn't know you needed me. I thought of you often, even though I hadn't seen you since exactly 2 years ago, and things were messy, but I thought I saw you persevering. cont'd

Pam bought me my first pair of Uggs. She would lend me her clothes and taught me the best angles for taking pictures of yourself. She brought me to Zumba, gave me relationship advice -- one time we went to the Entemann's outlet together and pigged out on doughnuts and danishes. I wish I had been more aware, I wish I had given more help.

Was thinking today of all the good times Pam, Dylan and I had. Dinner at P.F. Changs, swimming with Dylan, doing the bridge walk together, hanging out at her house. So hard to wrap my mind around the fact that she is really gone. I missed her when we lost touch but now that hole is much bigger:( Praying for her family during this difficult time!

Truly sadden to hear of a beautiful soul gone.....this life can be cruel and leave us in despair..."Pam...big sister of my teen years"...You were so loved...You truly lit up a room which I don't think you ever knew how you brought love to others with just that beautiful smile and brought two beautiful children to share with your family...Love you butterfly...now you are free

I am so sorry I could not be there for you when you needed me most. I always looked up to you growing up and admired your kindness and generosity. I wish more than anything that I could have helped you more later in life. I miss you and will always love you.

Oh Pam, your laughter and spirit will be with me everyday. I stare at our group picture from Cabo everyday in my office; between that trip and Kim's wedding we made so many memories in a brief period of time.

Please watch over your family for now you are their Angel and will always be in their hearts.

When Pam was born she only weighed 4 lb. and 3 oz. We couldn't bring her home from the hospital until she weighed 5 lb. After many ups and downs we finally got to bring her home knowing she was a force to be reckoned with and a fighter even back then. She was a beautiful little girl with a beautiful smile and so girly and giggly that her Dad called her "Bubbles". -continued-

That smile could light up a room and make her even a more beautiful woman. She opened up her heart to anyone she needed help, love, or a lift up, always kind in a world that sometimes forgets kindness and her own pain made her more caring of others. Pam was a free spirit but like a fragile wounded bird at the end of her life and I know she is finally at peace and flying free. -continued-

Her struggles are over. I will miss her and love her forever, my little girl.

Mom

You were so loved by a family that wanted the best for you. I wish you had left New Jersey and that my kids had had the chance to know their fun and loving aunt.  I hope you are at peace and I will see you again one day.

To my only sister- I will love you always and forever. You will never leave my heart. I wanted more than anything for you to leave NJ and come be with me and while that did not happen I know you are here with me now. I miss you so much and if I could I would bring you back and hug you and tell you just how much I love you. Please be free now and find peace. I love you forever!

I still can't believe that you're gone. I would give anything for one more of our talks. I am a better person for having you in my life. Matt and Nic are who they are because of you. Your spirit lit up a room and your laughter filled my soul when I needed it most. I miss you and I pray that you have found the peace you deserved. You will always be with me, my beautiful friend.