THE BABA I KNEW
I met Baba, as he was and will forever be fondly called, for the very first time when I went to look for one of his many “flowers” that he had in his “garden”.
For those who may not understand my parable and why it is important to my memory of Baba, I will explain.
I had met his daughter, ‘Fadekemi, in Borno State during our National Youth Corp Service year.
And as we rounded up service, I made a strategic move of collecting her home address before we all went our separate ways at the end of our service year.
Living in different states at the time, I made an even more strategic move to visit her for the first time after our service year on her birthday at her home.
And this I did to her great (and pleasant) surprise – thank God!
But it was also my first time meeting Baba.
As a father with 6 beautiful daughters (and a handsome son), I’m sure Baba would have guessed “wuz up” with my august visit in December.
And even though, on the surface, my visit was to wish ‘Fadekemi a happy birthday, my ultimate mission was about how I would pluck this “particular flower” from Baba garden.
Any father would have his antennas and guards up when such happens, and I know Baba was not any different.
Nevertheless, it was with very warm and open arms that he received me that day.
And as I got to later know and realize, Baba was a very, very friendly and welcoming person to practically any and everyone – especially to his children’s friends.
I thank God that I was not an exception to this.
He never gave me any ha ssles or issues concerning dating his daughter – none whatsoever.
Yes, he asked questions about me and my family but nothing beyond what any good father would.
And once it was confirmed that his daughter and I would be tying the knot, he drew me even closer.
I can remember how he took me from his home in Abeokuta where he lived, to his house in his hometown of Ilesha.
Beyond the times I used those Nigerian luxury transport buses to come from Borno State down to Lagos State during my service year, I had never experienced any road trip in Nigeria that was that long and adventurous.
I can remember another time when he drove me to his only full and older sister, “Mummy Ife”, as we called her, who lived in Ife.
He took me to her and like Baba, she too embraced me with open arms.
He also took me to one of his “adopted sons”, Boda Segun, all the way at Igbeti.
Baba, being a Yoruba lecturer, was always fond of telling me stories of not just his past but also historical stories about not just the Yoruba race, but of Nigeria as a whole.
I guess that he must have told those stories so often that when he began to tell/retell his stories, his children, especially his daughters, would stylishly excuse themselves, thus leaving to me, many a time, to be his sole listening audience.
Yes, Baba did all to make me feel like family.
He treated me like a son and I always felt welcome.
I remember during our traditional wedding when offered the customary bride price, he emphatically noted that his daughter was not for sale and that no amount of money could buy his daughter.
And he meant it.
Nevertheless, being a man of Yoruba customs, he just collected the token to fulfill all righteousness.
Even after we got married and we tried to offer him and Momo (his lovely wife and my ever-caring mother-in-law) some sort of gift, he reluctantly accepted it, noting that he didn’t want us to spend so much on them as we were just starting off as man and wife.
He was never shy to express his feelings openly – especially when it concerned his children or grandchildren.
He was all tears when he saw his first grandchild for the first time and carried her in his arms during her naming ceremony.
This was the man Baba.
And even though ill-health made a him a shadow of himself towards the time he passed on, the memories of him in his hey days will forever have prominence in our hearts.
Thank you, Baba, for being a very warm and caring father-in-law to me.
Thank you for being a very accommodating father to many.
Now, as you take your deserved rest, may you find shelter and solace in the arms of the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, just as so many found solace with you.
Sun re Baba.
Sun re.
Ayodeji O. Somolu
(Your first son-in-law)