My beautiful sister Reem, it's your birthday March 31st
March 23, 2021
by fawzya Hirji
From Shirley Khairullah
"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” - Viktor E. Frank
That day we lit a candle while you were leaving your home, that light burns bright. It shows me that you’re ready to go back to your creator.As a mother – and a caregiver to Adam, the love of your life. The desire of your heart is to make a valuable difference to the well-being of that precious child who is relying on you for love, emotional and physical support. It’s difficult to watch him grieving (missing his Mom and Dad), his eyes are looking for you and his heart is still talking to you. You looked for help over the years, and while never wanting to give-up, you were at your wit’s end. Longing for a certain guidance to happen. Then you found St Joseph Forensic in Hamilton: Having access to an experienced physiatrist (Dr. Ferencz) means that suddenly you and your precious Adam are not alone. You found hope in a feeling of trust, a security, and a desire to keep going. My sweet sister you lived your legacy in a marathon through both rocky places and beautiful meadows.
About her achievement: Even though her death was tragic, let's not dwell on our significant loss, but instead focus on paying tribute to her remarkable life. Reem would have wanted us to celebrate her life and speak about her achievements and our fond memories with a smile.
A talented coach, an aspiring mother, sister, cousin, aunt, and friend. She inspired many parents at the Association of Parent Support Groups in Ontario (APSGO) not only how to handle their children but imparted lessons of self-esteem, self-confidence, along with a good belly laugh.
She also was a member of the Institute for Advancement in Mental Health (IAM). She raised funds for research into a cause and cure for schizophrenia (schizo-effective disorder) by participating in an Annual Peace of Mind Walk in Oakville.
She also wrote letters to the Canadian Mental Health Society (CMHS) suggesting to raise the bar higher on mental health. Some of her suggestions were discussed by CMHS and in the process of implementing.
Until then, she’s always be with me – The IT team indicated that Reem logged out of the system at 4:29 pm, the moment in time in which my memory of her will be forever frozen. She will always remain 53., my sister, my cherished one. Yes, grief can blow us open that much, connect us that deeply to all of it. I am grateful for all the love you gave that makes the struggle less important. I love you
"When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” - Viktor E. Frank
That day we lit a candle while you were leaving your home, that light burns bright. It shows me that you’re ready to go back to your creator.As a mother – and a caregiver to Adam, the love of your life. The desire of your heart is to make a valuable difference to the well-being of that precious child who is relying on you for love, emotional and physical support. It’s difficult to watch him grieving (missing his Mom and Dad), his eyes are looking for you and his heart is still talking to you. You looked for help over the years, and while never wanting to give-up, you were at your wit’s end. Longing for a certain guidance to happen. Then you found St Joseph Forensic in Hamilton: Having access to an experienced physiatrist (Dr. Ferencz) means that suddenly you and your precious Adam are not alone. You found hope in a feeling of trust, a security, and a desire to keep going. My sweet sister you lived your legacy in a marathon through both rocky places and beautiful meadows.
About her achievement: Even though her death was tragic, let's not dwell on our significant loss, but instead focus on paying tribute to her remarkable life. Reem would have wanted us to celebrate her life and speak about her achievements and our fond memories with a smile.
A talented coach, an aspiring mother, sister, cousin, aunt, and friend. She inspired many parents at the Association of Parent Support Groups in Ontario (APSGO) not only how to handle their children but imparted lessons of self-esteem, self-confidence, along with a good belly laugh.
She also was a member of the Institute for Advancement in Mental Health (IAM). She raised funds for research into a cause and cure for schizophrenia (schizo-effective disorder) by participating in an Annual Peace of Mind Walk in Oakville.
She also wrote letters to the Canadian Mental Health Society (CMHS) suggesting to raise the bar higher on mental health. Some of her suggestions were discussed by CMHS and in the process of implementing.
Our soul connection: There are those special people in our lives with whom we look forward to sharing our brief moments and experiences on earth, someone to walk beside and someone to laugh like crazy. We saw so much the same way. I was her advisor, her mom (her words), her friend, her sister, her protector, and in so many ways she was mine.
What I've learnt: After days turn into week and months, everything became clear and true to me: Unresolved grief wouldn’t just disappear.
But how was I going to untangle this emotional mess?
I had to untangle those emotions one-by-one to find meaning to what happened. I began to strip away each layer until I distilled it all down to its essence: She had an aneurysm. Aneurysm exploded in her head and that’s what happened. She is in heaven.
Whatever we do at some point, it will be the last time we do it. Whomever we love at some point, there will be the last time we see them, speak to them, or hug them. We never really know when that will be. Reem, made me strong. I love that I became strong, but I resented the fact that I had to lose her to be strong. I hope and pray my children become strong. I hope and pray they don’t have to lose me to become that way. I will mold them and give them tasks to make them strong.Until then, she’s always be with me – The IT team indicated that Reem logged out of the system at 4:29 pm, the moment in time in which my memory of her will be forever frozen. She will always remain 53., my sister, my cherished one. Yes, grief can blow us open that much, connect us that deeply to all of it. I am grateful for all the love you gave that makes the struggle less important. I love you