Exactly a month ago, I lost you - Adefunke Sandra, my dear older sister. It’s taken this long to write because I kept hoping you’d pop over and tell me it’s an elaborate joke.

You were an amazing sister who simply loved me for who I am. You taught me so much. So many of my “firsts” were shared with you. My first pair of heels at 12, my first make up kit at 13, my first pair of skinny jeans - so tight I always had to lie down to put it on. You took me to my first day at boarding school, my first and subsequent concerts - Kool & The Gang, Shalamar …….. You snuck me into “Aiye” and then feigned ignorance when I couldn’t sleep with the lights off for weeks.

The 10 yrs+ age gap meant nothing to us. We shared too many experiences and escapades. We enjoyed hours of family gossip and endless witty conversations. We shared a lot of confidences - mainly your scandalous ones but I’ve sworn to take it to the grave.

I remember the many parties that you snuck out to. Then at early morning devotion where we all had to recite bible verses, I would have crammed a long verse (effico that I am) delivered with Popsie nodding with pride. When asked, you’d usually quote John 11:35 “Jesus wept”. It never failed to crack us up as Popsie’s veins will be throbbing in annoyance whilst Mumsie would give you serious side eye of “to be continued”.

You were beautiful, fabulous, wickedly funny and fearless. I remember you once threw a party for your 21st birthday that blocked the roads leading to the Estate, we then had to put the house back in order before the parents returned at 9am. Neighbors came to report you yet you remained adamant that it was a party for a “few” friends. Sis, you truly were a legend.

We shared a love of music, dancing, fashion and makeup. I’ll never forget your wedding; I did a smoky eye makeup thinking it was fabulous. Pictures came out and I looked like a panda. I asked why you didn’t stop me, you said, “You felt amazing so why should I burst your bubble”.

You also permitted me to sew a backless dress for the After Party. I had to spend the night avoiding awon parents so they wouldn’t see my age inappropriate aso ebi. You always supported my schemes and endeavors. I remember when I started my entrepreneurship at 16, I’d bring all manners of knickknacks to your office and you’ll coerce your colleagues into patronising me.

The last few months were brutal but you approached it with your fierce spirit. Thank you for the last night I spent praying with you. Little did I know that I was ushering you towards the Heavenly Gates. I know that you will have customised your garments in Heaven, and ensured that the crown matches your shoes, my fashionista Sis.

It’s now beginning to dawn on me that you’re gone. It really hurts to think that I simply do not have an older sister anymore. Thank you for the posse of loyal friends that are willing to make your loss easier to bear.

Thank you for trusting me to take care of your affairs. I hope I have made you proud with my decisions so far.

Thank you for the love and support you blessed me with. I can’t put into words how much you are missed. Rest on Sis, till we meet again.